





                          The Urban Terrorist Presents...



                            Avoiding Law Enforcement



The file is designed to help you deal better with the cops and how to avoid
getting arrested.  This will only discuss breifly how not to get caught in the
first place (Rule #1- COMMON SENSE!) but will get very detailed on how to avoid
being arrested.


Let's begin.

Like I said earlier, the best way to avoid getting busted in the first place is
to use COMMON SENSE.  If you have no idea what this is, delete his file, sell
your modem, and start learing to program profficiantly in LOGO.

Now, if you have common sense, you're already one jump ahead of the cops
because they have none.  Step 2- Learn to walk.  If you are moving REAL fast,
wearing dark clothes and are between the ages of 16-22 and it's night they're
gonna nab you!  They have nothing better to do. They believe that you are a
bigger problem than Drunk Drivers!

there are two ways to be inconspicuas:

#1- Walk mellow.  take your time and observe your surroundings.  Stop and talk
to someone one the street, bum a cigerete (even if you don't smoke) ask
directions, thumb a ride, act harmless.  Even if you have just ripped off
$20,000 don't act like it.  keep the breathing under control and be smart.  No
matter the situation, keep a cool head.  I'm gonna mention this several time to
make sure you understand!  KEEP A COOL HEAD!

#2- wear either a full black SWAT outfit or camoflauge or a compbo of the both.
Move in the swaddows at night when no one is around, as soon as there's a car
ASSUME that it's a cop!  The 1st time you don't think it's a cop it will be!
Hop fences only when you are sure there are NO dogs, although they can be tamed
with some RAW meat...


That covers the general way not to be seen.


HOW TO DEAL WITH THE COPS WHEN YOU GET CAUGHT


Let's face it.  Everyone get's caught.  I've been popped with Possesion of
Illeagal Fireworks 3 times an gotten of all 3 times!  the first time I was
lighting bottle rockets off the top of a parking Garage over the bus terminals.
File Krackers, whistling bottle rockets etc...like I said, I got away.

Rule #1- DON'T RUN!  Unless you have done something that they are gonna haul
your ass in big time for, don't make a break for it.  If it's BIG and they
catch you anyway, the evading arrest charge will be thrown out of court (at
least in California.  Check with your local laws reguarding 'double' jeperdy).
If the cops screem at you, drop everything, throw your hands on top of your
head (fingers locked) scream "I'M UNARMED AND AM TURNING MY SELF IN" then walk
SLOWLY backwards doing everything to the letter that they say.

Rule #2- Speak with the upmost respect to the cops.  Let's face it, they go
home and beat off after making some kid piss his pants, in fact, do just that-
PISS YOUR PANTS.  Shake, babble, cry.  Especially if you are in HS. If you're
lucky they will feel sorry for you and take you home.  When talking to cops,
act like your in the Army, "Yes SIR."  "That's correct SIR." "Sir, my name is
John Doe SIR".  That get off on that too.  If they pull the famous "You're
gonna have a boyfriend in there" just say "Thank you, SIR" with the most
respectful voice you can dish up without sounding like a smart ass.

Rule #3- Tell them what they want to know.  If they havn't read you your rights
you can say anything.  Once they read you your rights say NOTHING.  You are
going to jail if they do that.  Say nothing till you call a lawyer.  You don't
even have to say your name, they have your wallet, they know who you are.  But
if your standing there talking, go ahead and answer their questions.

Rule #4- Be a good bullshitter!  I got out of all of my pridicaments by being
able to give them a serious line of bullshit that was very believeable.  When
asked about fileworks, I didn't say "Oh ya, my buddy here smuggled'em over 4
state lines!"  I say, "I found'em in my old mans closet."  Works nice, sounds
good too.  If all else fails, your old man get's popped for Contributing to the
deliquincy of a Minor!!  Think of the possiblities on that one...

Rule #5- USE COMMON SENSE!  Think about it, the cops hate paper work.  They
have so many forms to fill out when they arrest it's pitiful!  They usually
will nab your goods and tell you to get home!  Also, rememebr to play off their
EGO trip.  Sound scared even though your not.  Stddering gives you more time to
think.  When approched about something your friend is holding and he's going
through his pockets, empty out your and show them what you have (gives you time
to stash or toss stuff!).  Be eager to show them your ID, even before they ask
for it!  THINK THINK THINK!  You have no better tool than your brain so USE IT!



Welp, that'll wrap it up for now.  Hope this gives you some insight on dealing
with cops.  Oh, in closing, if you have no ID (good if you're doing someting
vandelistic!) try to have someone ELSE's ID memorised, like the goody goody
nerd in your 5th period class.  Memorize all of his info so that you can roll
that off to the cops.  He'll have a clean record (or at least DID till you got
done with it!).


Take care and kill a Faggot for 'ol UT...

Urban Terrorst, signing off


