This File: School Phun 4, aka "College Phun!!!!"

Thanxz to the Locksmith and other MegaDeath members for various ideas and
input. 

Well, here it is, the First ever COLLEGE PHUN tutorial!
Here we discuss institutional hell-raising on a post-secondary level for those
who for whatever reason do not belong to a frat (the normal, respected source
of activities of this nature). 


- Let's start with "Computing Services". One of the neatest places you can piss
  people off is in the terminal room of your local U. The Classic Krazy Glue in
  the keyboards goes over well, and so does Krazy Gluing the Terminal 
  brightness knobs on minimum (which means OFF). Another neato is to remove 
  the "anti-glare" coating from monitor screens. If there is necessary terminal
  documentation posted near terminals, remove them; it confuses the hell out of
  moronic first year students.
  Still more fun? Put a big slash in the big huge wide ribbon of that line
  printer; it will wear out and break shortly, but while you are not around.
  Go to the paper stack behind the printer and rubber-stamp whatever you want
  on every sheet in the stack, like "the lab instructor is a known faggot" or
  something to that effect. Better yet, steal a BOX of paper, and have this 
  sort of thing offset printed onto EVERY sheet in the 4000 in the box.
  Ah, yes, back to the terminals. Have you ever noticed the "SETUP" key on
  VT-100 and VT-220 terminals? You can have endless phun with these guys; make
  the screen 132 columns so it looks really retarded, or make it 
  black-on-white text, or both. Enable a foreign character set, too. For REAL
  laughs, change the baud rate of the terminal. Most terminals support MANY
  different baud rates; from 50 up to 19200. Usually a terminal will be set by
  university techs to 9600 baud; change it to 50 baud. Change ALL the terminals
  to 50 baud; 1st year geeks especially will wonder why the computer is so damn
  slow!!!
  Alternatively, leave the "receive" speed at 9600 baud so the computer's
  output looks normal enough, but set only the "transmit" speed to 50. The 
  terminal will not be able to keep up with good typists at this speed, and 
  will cause *MANY* dropped characters.
  Another interesting thing to do to terminals is plug up the vent slots with
  bubble gum, Krazy Glue, or whatever, and see how fast the terminal melts 
  itself from overheat.
  Lastly, hacking user accounts is always fun. How to do this is another story
  for another file, but WHAT to do when you get there is almost unlimited. Do
  things like send pornographic email to all the female students (and faculty!)
  or make "minor" changes to the docs that accompany student programs...like
  have them say what a wank head the prof is or what a gay assignment that was
  or whatever. Using up a whole lot of other people's computer time is also a 
  gas. Get online to some moron's account, and dial out to decent pirate boards
  nationwide. Take a whole lot of files at 12 or even 2400 baud and print them
  up on the hi-speed line printer. That's how to get a whole lot of files,
  really quick and free.



- The Library, ah yes, the Library, probably the favorite college prankster's
  grounds. God, the things you can fuck up here...
  Let's start with stacks of books. If you see a study carrel with a mess of
  someone's belongings in it, place a library book in the middle of his/her/its
  texts so he/she/it doesn't notice. If your library has electronic theft
  detection (and what library doesn't?) then the sucker will get beeped at by
  the alarm and get into a whole mess of trouble.
  Rearranging the card catalog into a random order has always been a favorite,
  and it still gets great results (Russian Poetry in the middle of all the
  Nuclear Physics cards???)
  Also, taking cards out, and re-typing them with phony info about its Dewey
  number or Library of Congress number, is always fun. Replace the cards, of
  course, but only the re-typed ones. Also, change the dates of old books to 
  this year; people will expect a nice new easy-to-read book and will get
  beat-up falling-apart old heaps of shit. Or, you can "help" make new books 
  older very quickly...
  Back to study carrels. Place water on these, so papers get wet and ink runs.
  Or syrup, the stickiness will drive people NUTS. Take a knife and create
  various trenches and pits in the surface of these, so that it is impossible
  to draw a straight line against them.
  
  HOW TO STEAL BOOKS: 
  OK, you know those damn electronic theft detectors I mentioned? Well, they
  only have those at the door, so what you do is open a window, and throw
  whatever books you want outside, with an accomplice out there to help catch
  them so you don't fuck them up or leave a suspicious-looking pile of books
  lying outside. It's best to do this after dark, for two reasons: (a) Because
  at later hours there are fewer library attendants to catch you in the act,
  and (b) so that your accomplice is not flagrantly obvious in broad daylight
  as he catches books falling from the sky...

  
