### Apollo BBS Archive - September 24, 1988

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    Message: 4292
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Rod
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 16:04:20

    So "realizing that we are kin" means whining about relatively minor problems
    while sneering at those who truly suffer?

    Message: 4293
    Author: $ Mike Carter
    Category: Idea for thought
    Subject: "KIN"
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 21:16:39

    Hey Rod,

    Try reading a newspaper sometime. If you're careful, you will see that
    "KIN" are killing each other with knives, bombs, guns and even poison.

    Try replacing your shallow insight with another word;

    Jesus Christ.

                            -Mike

    Message: 4294
    Author: $ James Hawley
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 06:33:43

    Oh, is it *his* fault?

    Message: 4295
    Author: $ Daryl Westfall
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: JT/What?
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 12:56:39

    Whatever it is you're attempting to convey (whenever you actually ARE
    attempting to convey some point), it is usually obscured by your character
    assassinations, insults, and other props you use to prop up your own sense
    of self-superiority. If you ARE trying to say something, then say it and cut
    the rest of the crap.

    By the way, since when did you ever suffer?

    Message: 4298
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: JT/suffer
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:22:27

            Are you referring to the men, women and children in Viet Namn who
    were napalmed, sprayed with chemicals which ate their insides out, their
    villages zippoed, their bodies tortured by the Americans?  Oh.

    Message: 4299
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Mike
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:23:23

            And you can't read messages very well, otherwise you would know what
    I'm talking about.  And Jesus Christ is a jerk.

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    Subject:JT

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     1:        I am sorry to say this but I have the feeling that JT was subjected
     2:to parential denial.  In other words, his early years were without the love
     3:emotion from either of his parents.  I may be wrong, this is just a guess I
     4:am making based on JT's character at this stage in his early life.
     5:        If this is true, fear not, love can be found from beggars on street
     6:corners, I know.
     7:                                Rod
     8:P.S.  Or tramps in alley ways.
     9:end

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    Message: 4301
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Suffering
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:02:21

    Though it should be obvious to anyone who is even semi-literate, I should
    clarify that I am not setting myself forth as someone who has truly suffered
    or engaging in a silly competition with Rod over who has suffered more.  I
    have no doubt that his life has been considerably more difficult than mine.
    My point is that Rod's suffering is relatively trivial when compared with
    the lives of those who have been forced to live under ideas such as those
    Rod espouses.

    Rod, you're now talking about American abuses in Vietnam.  True, there were
    some.  But whatever America did wrong in Indochina is far overshadowed by
    what the Communists have done since the U.S. left.  You didn't have millions
    of "boat people" fleeing Vietnam until after the fall of Saigon.  Thousands
    of Vietnamese risked their lives to come to the United States.  Why do you
    suppose that is, Rod, when our "pig capitalism" is so awful?  You seem to
    think you have some special insight into how rotten our system is.  How is
    it that you know so much better than people who have lived under another
    system and are able to compare?

    Message: 4302
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Westfall
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:04:16

    Well excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me.

    Message: 4303
    Author: $ Travis SYSOP
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: years
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:43:02

            Tomarow is my Birthday............

    Message: 4304
    Author: $ Zak Woodruff
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 17:09:48

    Well then happy birthday.

    Message: 4305
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: JT/other systems
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 17:51:05

            I know a few people from other systems but they aren't allowed to
    write or they may get into trouble.  You see, everything they do write is
    censored.
            I never said that I particularily suffered a lot.  I have had my bad
    moments but I do realize that many others have truly suffered just by being
    born in a particular location.  My problems are petty compared to theirs.
                                    Rod

    Message: 4306
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Father-in-Law
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 17:51:54

          Actually, you cannot judge my father-in-law by something I said
    that he said.  I quoted him out of context and what I posted had
    little to do with the current conversation.  For this I apologize.
          I did not pass on your remark to him as this would have been
    unfair.  The fault was mine.
          Jasmine's father is an interesting man.  He retired several
    years ago from the U. S. Health Service.  For a while he was stationed
    in Washington, D.C. but he didn't like being there because of the
    politics.  He went looking for the person who had the rank to transfer
    him back to New Orleans.  He found out that that person was himself.
          He designed the health program that the U.S. Military uses.
    After he retired he became a professor of entomology at Tulane
    University at New Orleans.
          He has written many a book on insects and the study of vector
    borne diseases but he also has written books on other subjects as well.
    He wrote, The Complete Ballerina, which of course is about Ballet and
    this book sold copies all over the world. The book is about the life
    of a famous teacher of that art, Maria Halleran (sp) althought I can't
    remember her exact name.  Jasmine's sister, Dixie, a student of that
    dance is featured in the last chapter.
          On so little evidence, you should watch who you call an idiot
    although from the way it happened, it could be understood.
                                            Rod

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    Subject:Travis

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     1:        Happy Birthday Anniversary!
     2:end

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    Message: 1010
    Author: $ Mike Carter
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Ann
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 21:19:36

    After the last ontest I particpated in, I got rather disgusted wuith
    the way things were handled. I think you remember.
    My boycott remains in effect.
                            -Mike

    Message: 1011
    Author: $ James Hawley
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 06:34:33

    Sour grapes, eh?

    Message: 1012
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Chit-Chat
    Subject: Mike/Kontest
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 07:58:55

    Why not forgive and forget if you have a grievance? I like being in
    compatition against you - even though I usually come out second! Lets have
    another Kontest with a Halloween theme. OK? =*--ANN--*=

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    Subject:Ann/last

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     1:        Okay on the Kontest, but please, NO hollow weenies, please.
     2:end

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    Message: 1014
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Rod/last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:33:57

    OK - I promise no rocket pictures from me or anything simular! Ta, ta.
    =*--ANN--*=

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    Message: 2034
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: Ann
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 16:06:08

    That's right, darling, I'm one of THEM.  And don't try to escape, because
    THEY are watching you.

    Message: 2035
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: "Straight talk"
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 16:06:46

    Incoherent rambling is not "straight talk."

    Message: 2036
    Author: $ Mike Carter
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: All on JT
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 21:22:22

    "You are what you eat..."

                                            -Mike

    Message: 2037
    Author: $ Sandy SYSOP
    Category: Question ?
    Subject: Mike/last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 00:53:12

            Was it you I saw last night walking down Van Buren
    eating a Twinkie and a Ding Dong?

    Message: 2038
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Question ?
    Subject: Sandy/last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:01:29

    Mike was eating a 'Ding Dong'?

    Message: 2039
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: JT dear
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:06:41

    Yeah - I know 'They' are watching! And since you are one of them - I take
    back all I said about you being 'shit' and eating shit!' You are a fine
    fellow and I have the utmost respect for you and your opinions! Keep up the
    good work and I wish you well guy. Sincerely =*--ANN--*=

                   * The above is 'Stright Talk!' *

    Message: 2040
    Author: $ Daryl Westfall
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: JT/One Of "Them"
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:11:07

    Tell me, is it true what they say about Room 101?

    Can I get you a drink? Some gin, perhaps?

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    Subject:JT

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     1:        If my message about you suffering from lack of love early in life is
     2:false then my second guess is now that you have joined the establishment,
     3:you have started drinking too much alcohol.
     4:        My third guess is that the John Birch Society relayed this attitude
     5:to you.
     6:        In any case, I really mean this,  I love you.
     7:                                Rod
     8:end

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    Message: 2042
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: Rod
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:05:04

    What exactly is the "establishment"?

    Message: 2043
    Author: $ Gary Jones
    Category: Cosmos-Chatter
    Subject: last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:21:50

    Every person on earth except JT & Rod

    Remember what the Quaker said?

    I think everyone is a little peculiar except me and thee,
    and sometimes I wonder about thee.

    Practice what you preach, sir.

    Gary

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    Subject:JT/establishment

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     1:        I dunno!
     2:end

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    Message: 54257
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Ann
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 16:00:44

    You take my statements out of context, and you accuse me of having a
    "gigantic ego"?

    Message: 54258
    Author: $ Apollo SYSOP
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Rod? Friend
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 18:53:13

            I am for a strong military.... I guess I ain't no friend of yours
    then!  So be it!
            The Military helps employ thousands!  Where do you think the money
    goes?  It goes from top to bottom in the economy, even bomb builders need to
    buy bread.

    SMILE! (-:} *=* the 'Mighty' Apollo SYSOP *=*

    Message: 54259
    Author: Apro Poet
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: It's back!
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 19:35:18

      Yeah, yeah.  So APS mainlined some heavy juice to my
    Promodem & it wasn't wearing a rubber.  <>  Major
    Data withdrawal symptoms.  <>  Pardon me while I
    gather my wits.
         Apro Poet

    Message: 54260
    Author: $ Dean Hathaway
    Category: Politics
    Subject: Rod/Reagan
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 19:50:08

      Why is it, exactly, that anyone who is for military build up is not a
    friend of yours? Is anyone who is in favor of self-defense also not a friend
    of yours? It is interesting that it is 'build up' and not aggression that
    you point to as the deciding factor.
       See You Later
          Dean H.

    Message: 54261
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Cliff
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 20:05:46

    The idea that we should spend money on the military because the military
    creates jobs is sheer idiocy.  We have a military to defend the country from
    aggerssion, not to make work for people.  The military is a drain on the
    economy just as any government program is -- those employed by the military
    or military contractors could, were there no need to defend the nation, be
    working producing more consumer goods.  (Of course, military research and
    development often finds applications in the consumer sector, so this
    formulation is admittedly a bit simplistic.)

    The reason we have a military is because we need one to protect our freedom
    and our nation from those who would destroy them.  If we had no potential
    adversaries, we would be far better off without a miliatry -- it would make
    no sense to continue employing people, at taxpayer expense, doing something
    unnecessary.

    Message: 54262
    Author: $ Apollo SYSOP
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Military $$$
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 20:38:22

            Not what I quite ment Mr Taranto.  There are people that complain
    that ALL Moneys spent on anything military is money thown away.  I disagree!
            First off, the Military is for "Defence". With out a STRONG defence,
    there might be many other nations wanting to take over this prime property
    we call the U.S.of A.
            Yes, the TAX payers pay for this, but the personal in the military
    also pay taxes, thus a good turnover of money.   Money sitting on a shelf is
    not going to do anything for the poor or rich.  The military is one very
    large employer, and it's better than being on welfare.

            The point I am trying to make is the money is not destroyed, just
    redistributed in the economy creating a demand for service and product.
    This goes round and round....  A lot of taxpayers earn their money from
    military spending... so what that they have to pay taxes, at least they have
    have money to spend and pay taxes.

    SMILE! (-:} *=* the 'Mighty' Apollo SYSOP *=*

    Message: 54263
    Author: $ Apollo SYSOP
    Category: Commercial
    Subject: Repair anyone?
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 20:47:02

            Drive Alignments, Printers cleaned, and other general computer
    services.....  Call SYSOP Cliff!  He can even pick-up and deliver (for a
    small fee) or set up complete systems!  (he just can't spell)

    SYSOP Cliff at 843-3346, I REPEAT, 843-3346!

    SMILE! (-:} *=* the 'Mighty' Apollo SYSOP *=*

    Message: 54264
    Author: $ Mike Carter
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Military
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 21:09:45

    The very notion that tax dollars spent into military funds are a waste
    of money is at best nearsighted.
    If all of these wailing peaceniks with their teflon'd nostrils berating
    world peace and stomping around in circles had THEIR chunk of real estate
    invaded by a foreign power, they're most likely going to be the first
    screaming CIVIL DEFENSE !

    Familiarity breeds contempt, admittedly the groans uttered from my own
    vocal cords on payday when I see the amount taken out for taxes are
    painfull. At the same time, I've been in countries that live in a constant
    state of fear because their border neighbors are hostile and hungry for
    land and resources and have a much bigger army .
    Instead of turning a blind eye toward what humans do, really are and if
    allowed, what they will do to others try playing a game of RISK with
    some friends (immediate familiy members exlcuded) and see what can happen
    if you allow a hostile foreign power to gain control over other countries.

            Enjoy
                                    -Mike

    Message: 54265
    Author: $ Carol Graham
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: JT/ANN
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 00:42:23

    She has good reason to bitch. What is there to gloat about concerning this
    election?   Dukakatitis could be catching. Soon we will all go around with
    fake Mona Lisa expression on our faces, speaking out of the ends of our
    noses and plodding, just plodding. Put him on the front of the plow and we
    can get rid of all the jackasses.

    Then, Beat around the Bushitis would set in. We could pretend we know what
    we are talking about, pretend that patriotism is greater than realism and,
    wow!  what a state we would be in.  So, Ann, I am with you!!!!

    Speaking of realism...what in heck has happened to the cash flow in this
    country????

    Carol->

    Message: 54266
    Author: $ Carol Graham
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: Cliffy/Arms
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 00:46:47

    I am with you on this issue!

    Wouldn't we be in a fine kettle of ashes if we had not built them up?
    My gosh, what do the disbelievers think has been keeping us out of war?
    Perhaps our charismatic president's manners?  Perhaps our rock stars?
    Perhaps our great penchant for sports?  or is it just because we Americans
    are so well-loved?  You know darned well what it is!  And I couldn't agree
    more.   So it helps our economy????  So, it's a good thing that *something*
    is helping it.

    Maybe Rod wants to preserve the country with greener sewers?

    Carol->

    Message: 54267
    Author: $ Carol Graham
    Category: Answer!
    Subject: James White
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 00:47:15

    Do good....I'll be listening.

    Carol->

    Message: 54268
    Author: Michael Kielsky
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Drugs/Netherlands
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 01:49:30

    Hardly an "enlightend" policy!

    Supplying subsidized drugs to adolescents, and providing free heroin to drug
    addicts is not hardly very "bright"!

    And as for freedom, did you know that most Western European nations
    "require" that you register with the local law enforcement agency when you
    establish residency in their jurisdiction?  By keeping tabs on people, they
    make sure that they can kick in your doors anytime to verify the fact that
    you are still free (this is hysterical blabbering on my part, but so what?)

    Michael Kielsky

    Message: 54269
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Todd on JT
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 07:53:02

    Re: his ego - it isn't particually his accuracy (for the most part, his post
    are accurate and well put) - it's how he presents them! For instance, his
    post #54261 to Cliff was an excellent one but why was it necessary to use
    the words 'Sheer Idiocy' in responding? This is to imply that Cliff is an
    idiot to have his own opinion. This kind of response no doubt builds up his
    ego even more in his own eyes - but takes away from the gist of his post.
    People in turn respond in defense and then the subject gets put in the back
    ground and there is a scuffle to find to appropriate 'put down' to use in
    retaliation. This isn't conversing. It's alright on some of the other sigs.
    but not this one. Portential new members will log on to see what Apollo is
    like and see all those insults and not log in again. I reccommended Apollo
    to a friend and he finally logged on and when I ask him about it - his
    response was "No thank you! That isn't disscussing - that's tearing each
    other apart.!" I noticed he never logged on again. Maybe it's no big deal to
    have lost him - my opinion is 'if you can't stand the heat, then get out of
    the oven!" But I feel all these 'little' insults are unnecessary here and JT
    is the worst for that. =*--ANN--*=

    Message: 54270
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Carol.
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:00:03

    Thanks Carol. =*--ANN--*=

    Message: 54271
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Ann
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:35:46

    I think you owe Cliff an apology for calling him an idiot.

    Message: 54272
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Cliff
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:41:42

    Government redistribution programs are no good for the economy, and if
    military work were merely a make-work redistribution scheme, it would
    perhaps be worse for the economy than welfare, since it draws some of the
    most skilled people away from civilian jobs.

    Of course, if we dismantled the military it would be a disaster for the
    economy, since the country would be taken over by those who aim to destroy
    the freedom that makes the economy work.  As long as the nation faces
    external threats, we need a military.  But this is the only justification
    for it.  It is not a giant welfare or job-creation program, and the tendency
    to view it as such is detrimental both to our economy and our national
    secutiry.

    Message: 54273
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: JT/last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 09:11:55

    See! You can answer without insults and it was a good post. I agree!
    =*--ANN--*=

    Message: 54274
    Author: $ Daryl Westfall
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: ann/last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:15:22

    Agreed!

    Message: 54275
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Apro
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:33:18

            You were missed.

    Message: 54276
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Dean/military
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:39:00

            The billions (trillions?) of dollars spend on military build up is
    in my opinion a sin as long as there are hungry, homeless and under employed
    people in this land.  Our few thousand nuclear missles should be sufficient
    until our internal problems are settled.  We have more than enough military
    hardware to destroy this entire earth.  When will it end?
                                    Rod

    Message: 54277
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Mike Carter
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:52:28

            I like how you worded your message.  True, it is the land (real
    estate) we are protecting, not necessarily our freedoms.  We are all taught
    we are free in school, just so we will know.  Without a military of any kind
    we would be in jeparody of losing our land.
            Just as President Jackson went to war with Mexico over the
    southwestern part of what is now the United States, another country could
    easily do the same.  It was proved that Mexico's army was not strong enough
    to defend its prime real estate.  They should have done as Jackson suggested
    and sold the land to the U.S.
            But we have more than enough military hardware, more than enough
    body bags so why the huge expenditures?  I think the military tried to solve
    several problems during the sixties, draft poor minorities to fight in
    Viet Namn and by so doing solve the U.S. welfare problem.
            This is just a bull$hit message.

    Press  to abort
    Message: 54277
    Author: $ Rod Williams
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Mike Carter
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 13:52:28

            I like how you worded your message.  True, it is the land (real
    estate) we are protecting, not necessarily our freedoms.  We are all taught
    we are free in school, just so we will know.  Without a military of any kind
    we would be in jeparody of losing our land.
            Just as President Jackson went to war with Mexico over the
    southwestern part of what is now the United States, another country could
    easily do the same.  It was proved that Mexico's army was not strong enough
    to defend its prime real estate.  They should have done as Jackson suggested
    and sold the land to the U.S.
            But we have more than enough military hardware, more than enough
    body bags so why the huge expenditures?  I think the military tried to solve
    several problems during the sixties, draft poor minorities to fight in
    Viet Namn and by so doing solve the U.S. welfare problem.
            This is just a bull$hit message.

    Message: 54278
    Author: $ David Burkhart
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 14:24:55

    Yeah, it was.
    JT is correct that military spending adds little to the economy, since they
    don't produce something people want, just protect us.  Note that that
    "Massachucetts Miracle" is largely due to defense spending.  But as David
    Friedman says, it's better to pay taxes to Washington than to Moscow -- the
    rates are cheaper.
    During the last eight years, the Soviet Union has not taken another inch of
    soil.  Yet many countries have moved closer to democracy and freedom (the
    Phillipines, Grenada, and so on).  The INF Treaty, which for the first time
    in history destroys nuclear weapons, would have been impossible without the
    decision to deploy Pershing missiles in Europe.
    A strong military results in less war.
    I remember knowing someone who was committed to nonviolence.  Yet he bought
    a gun to protect his family.  He said he would use it if he had to.  So why
    doesn't he understand the nation's need for a deterrent too?

    Message: 54279
    Author: David Hale
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Words of wisdom
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 14:37:05

    In the event that biological existence renders you the recipient of oblong,
    yellow-tinted citrus fruits with an excessively tangy flavor, it is hereby
    recommended that you utilize the aforementioned vegetation, in concert with
    sucrose and dihydrogen oxide, in the production of a pleasant-tasting
    beverage.

    It is false to assert that the aggregate of a duet of improper actions is
    not inequivalent to a single laudable action.

    Message: 54280
    Author: Apro Poet
    Category: Politics
    Subject: PROJECT CENSORED
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 15:35:15

    From *Ute Reader*, SEPT./OCT. 1988:

    The top 12 censored stories of 1987

      We are constantly reminded that we live in the Information
    Age.  And to some extent this is undeniably true -
    magazines, newsletters, videocassettes, direct mail flyers,
    radio reports, cable programming, leaflets, fortune cookies,
    and filofaxes all clutter our consciousness with unending
    streams of facts.  Yet Project Censored makes a convincing
    case that we are not always privy to some of the information
    that matters most, especially regarding threats to our
    health and news of government malfeasance.
      Each year Project Censored highlights the most important
    news stories underreported or overlooked by the American
    media.  An *Utne Reader* article topped the list this year,
    production editor Lynette Lamb's look at the limited number
    of wealthy families who control most of the American media
    and how they influence what is reported as news (Jan./Feb.
    1988, p.17).  The No. 12 story selected by Project
    Censored's panel of media experts concerns the alarming
    extinction rate among plant and animal species, with an
    *Utne Reader* In Brief by Jeremiah Creedon cited as a source
    (Jan./Feb. 1988, p.15).  Two other In Briefs researched and
    reported by regular *Utne Reader* contributors - Karin
    Winegar's update on food irradiation (May/June 1987, p.29)
    and Chris Gunderson's report on U.S. military activities in
    Puerto Rico (Jan./Feb. 1988, p.13) - also were among the 25
    stories singled out for attention by Project Censored.
    We're proud to be part of such an important journalistic
    enterprise.

    (continued)

    Message: 54282
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Rod
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 15:51:47

    You are making even less sense than usual when you assert that military
    spending is a "sin" as long as there are "hungry, homeless, and under
    employed [whatever that means] people."  Anyone who is making enough money
    to pay federal taxes to support the military is not going hungry or living
    on the streets, so this is a non sequitur.  I guess if you really want to
    nitpick, you can complain that people who don't pay taxes are "free riders"
    because they benefit from our defenses but don't pay for them, but I am
    happy to pay a bit more than my share to safeguard my freedom rather than
    worry about the fact that people aren't paying their share when they can't
    afford to.

    Message: 54283
    Author: $ James Taranto
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: Ann
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 15:51:57

    Shut up, you moron.

    Message: 54284
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: JT
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 16:31:01

    Oh no! Your at it again! Sigh. =*--ANN--*=

    Message: 54285
    Author: $ Zak Woodruff
    Category: Chit Chat
    Subject: just dropping in
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 17:26:11

    I am in Phoenix for the day.

    School is OK.  A lot of reading.  A lot of boring lectures.  I have
    prefessors who use phrases like "the giganticism of hugeness."  It's fun and
    at times extrememly gruesome.  I think I'll stay.
    Bulletin Board command:JN

    *=* Journey to a SIG *=*

    *=* WAY Below Normal Bulletin Board entered *=*

    WAY Below Normal Bulletin Board command:$C

    Press  to abort

    Message: 281
    Author: $ Sandy SYSOP
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Story
    Date: 09/23/88  Time: 16:58:56

            With that thought lingering in David's mind he closed his eyes.
            The warm rays of the sun found their way through a small crack in
    Digger's tattered, termite infested shack and followed their way up his back
    stopping for a moment to warm his face. Digger woke up, farted, burped, then
    scratched his rear.
            "Yeow!" screamed James as he pulled his finger out of his butt
    forgetting about his new-improved bionic arm. "Man, what happened ....?"
            James shuffles over to his dust covered Fridge for something to eat.
    He ponders over last night wondering what he is remembering is for real or
    if he was having one of his usual post-drunk nightmares. "Na!" he says to
    himself. Digger reaches in the Fridge for his leftover MacDonald Burger
    and Fries. Before he could put the burger in his foul smelling, salavating
    mouth the top to the bun falls off and buries itself amoungst the dust and
    cob-webs. He bends down and picks up the burger top. As he puts the molded,
    dusty, cob-webbed bun top back on his burger a vague image of last night's
    events comes to mind. "Joe? ..... Rod? ...... what about Joe?" he thinks to
    himself. Digger drops his burger and fries clasping his head in anguish.
    "Oh, Joe!" cries Digger remembering what Rod had told him. Digger grabs his
    burger and fries }iand heads out the door. He is ......

    Message: 282
    Author: $ James Hawley
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 06:40:39

    I don't eat McDonald's hamburgers.  And don't you ever state otherwise or
    you'll find yourself in court.

    Message: 283
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Story
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 08:27:42

    ... just about to lose his burger because he found out it was a McDonald's
    and he NEVER, but NEVER eats them from that joint. However, he managed to
    keep the little bit he ate down and he started shuffling between the
    tombstones and stopped in front of David Burkhart's!
    "I was right! This grave has been dug up from the inside! David IS BACK
    among us!" he muttered, shaking so hard he could hardly stand. He reached up
    to pick his nose and came away with blood all over his finger.
    "Damn this bionic arm! It'll take some getting used to!"
    A soft hand touched his shoulder half scaring him out of his wits and he
    turned to face James Taranto!
    James stood in the early morning sun, looking like he might have came from
    the grave himself! Deep lines etched his face and his eyes were sunk in and
    bruised looking - his shoulders stooped.
    "Why James! What in the hell is the matter with you? You look like 'death
    warmed over' or something! Are you sick?"
    :Don't be silly and idiotic Digger! I just havn't had any sleep for the last
    couple of nights and came here to see if this is true!" He points down at
    David's grave. "Has he truly risen"?
    "Yes, it's true James!"
    "Oh my God! Then tonight I will be next! I just know it!"
    Before Digger could console him, James, looking to be in a daze, started
    back towards his car thinking to himself "Tonight I meet my destiny! I only
    pray it will be swift and painless! Tonight! Tonight .........

    Message: 284
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Police A.P.B.
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 09:13:26

    * POLICE A.P.B. report.        ____          Have you seen this man?
                                 (/____\)
    He is reported to be        (/ _  _ \)       Some eyewitnesses say
    armed with a huge axe       (\ u  u /)       he looks to be from the
    and highly dangerous.        (\ -- /)        grave - especially
                           ________(__)_________      the smell!
                          /        l  l         \
    DISCRIPTION:         /    /l   l  l    l\    \   Do not approach this
    Over 6 feet tall.   /    / l   l  l    l \    \  suspect as he is
    Clothes, tattered  //\/\/  l   l  l    l  \/\/\\ linked to one murder
    and old, blood     /  /    l   l  l    l    \  \ and one maiming!
    spattered and     /  /     l\/\l__l\/\/l     \  \   Just call 911 if
    odoriferous.     /  /       l          l      \  \  if you do see him.
    Grey skin.      /  /        l          l       \  \
                   (  /         l    _     l        \  )
            _______((((____     l   l l    l        ()))
            ---------------     l   l l    l
           /   \                l\/\l l    l
          /_____\               l   l l\/\/l
                                l___l l____l
                               (____)(______)
    *This man is reported to be one David Burkhart! Files have confirmed
    this, but he has been dead over a year! Police believe this to be some
    pre-Halloween prank!*

    Message: 285
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Story
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 10:55:59

    James Taranto sat in the dingie hotel room in the waning evening light
    reading the Police A.P.B report he had gotten from a friend that works
    in the local precinct. His heart very heavy in his chest. Before that,
    he had tidied the room and put on his best clothes all the time
    chuckling to himself - "when they find me, at least I'll look good!"
         His mind ambled back over the last couple of years. Him and David
    seemed to have had a good relationship on Apollo. Some of the members
    even claimed that David was his clone but when they started to compare
    his insults - with James coming out ahead, David seemed to have slowly
    went bazerk, eventually taking his own life in despondency. "How silly
    it was of him to do such a wasteful thing" mumbled James. But then he
    suddenly realized that such name calling got him into this fix to begin
    with. He hung his head on his chest, knowing now, it was too late!
         In his reverie, he did not notice that evening was gone and
    darkness had descended - heavy and dank. His fate was just beyond the
    hotel room door as he was lost in what was to be his last thoughts!
         The door knob slowly turned and the door opened to reveal a
    gigantic figure in silhouette against the night. James slowly raised
    his head and much to his surprise, found no fear in himself - only
    resignation.
         "So, you've finally came for me David! What is it that you want
    from me"?
         The figure stepped into the room and slowly made it's way over to
    where James was huddled in the chair - his axe dragging  Cont.

    Message: 286
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Story
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 10:58:04

    ... along the floor, leaving a bloody trail on the worn carpet. He
    loomed huge and disgustingly smelly as he looked down at James.
         In a voice that sounded like it came from hell, the figure spoke
    to James with foul odors coming from his fetid breath. "Yes! It is I
    James Taranto and I have came to collect what I want - what I always
    wanted and envied from you!"
         "I have nothing you could want David! What is it that I have that
    you do not? We are both young and intelligent - at least you were once!
    It was so stupid to do yourself in and ..........."
         At that, the dead creature let out a bellowing roar and raised his
    axe high over his head. "Shut up already! You have uttered your last
    insult! Prepare to meet your maker you intellectual bore!"
         The axe came down on the top of James's head - splitting it open
    like an egg. A surprised look was still on his face.
         The dead thing dropped the axe with a sickening thud and reached
    up and pulled James's scull apart, revealing the brain. He put one
    gorey hand inside and with a tug, pulled the brain out, stem and all
    with one jerk, leaving all the blood vessels spouting gore like 'Old
    Faithful'!
         "Now I have what I want my friend - what I've always wanted and
    envied! It is mine now!" He held it high as if it was an offering, the
    brain matter dripping down his arms, on to his chest and face. He
    devoured it in two short gulps! Now, James's brain was his completely!
         His face contorted into a deadly smile and he thought "Tomorrow is

    Message: 287
    Author: $ Ann Oudin
    Category: Tawdry Tales
    Subject: Cont.
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 11:06:49

    another night and another victim!"

    All over town, the members of Apollo found themselves with a feeling of
    impending doom decend down on them! Collectively, they somehow knew that one
    of them would not be heard from again and wondered who would be ineviablly
    next!

    But one did know - did know for sure that they'd be next, but this time, it
    would be different! "No one is going to butcher me with out a fight!" said
    ......

    Message: 288
    Author: $ Zak Woodruff
    Category: Christian Rod!
    Subject: last
    Date: 09/24/88  Time: 17:31:35

    Travis Sysop.

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