
Confucius say:

 Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
 Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
 Stand on toilet, get high on pot.
 Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!
 Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
 Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
 Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
 Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk.
 A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
 Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
 Man who run behind car get exhausted.
 Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
 Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake with smelly finger.
 Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission
 grow up to be shiftless bastard.
 Man who lay girl on hill not on level.
 Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
 Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
 Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
 Man with atletic finger make broad jump.
 Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
 He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
 Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss baloons.
 Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.
 He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
 Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
 The hand that turneth the knob, opens the door.
 Man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.
 Man who lay woman on ground have peace (piece) on earth.
 Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands..
 Man who is jacking into a peanut butter jar is fucking nuts.
 Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
 Man who fly upside-down have crack up!
 He who eats to many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
 Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.
 America Good Place to Put Chinese Restuarant.
 Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.
 Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
 Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
 Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.
 When lady say no, she mean maybe
    when lady say maybe, she mean yes
    when lady say yes, she no lady
 He who rapes a man's daughter, draws and quarters his
    son, and buries his wife alive in an anthill should not expect to
    sit at that man's dinner table without the subject coming up.
 He who outruns the cheetah is fucking fast on his feet!
 There is no such thing as rape;  Woman run faster with skirt
    up, than Man with pants down.
 Man who take lady on camping trip have one intent.
 Man who put head on railroad track
    get splitting headache
 He who pull out to fast leave rubber behind.
 He who refuses to listen is lying.
 He who stands in corner with hands in pocket
     doesn't feel crazy, feels nuts.
