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                            The End is Near
                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                <<-HoE->>

                                          By, Mogel (Senior Officer)

 Release Date: 09/02/94
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        Ok, First let me get this clear: I am not an environmentalist.     
 Everyone and anyone that is even mildly strict with that sort of thing 
 would agree that I am just a hypocritical, wasteful, dick (and I guess 
 that is me).  Anyhowzydasie, I'm just sick and tired of some people 
 <coughcoughpoliticianscoughcough> sitting on their ass, and talking the 
 lines, but doing shit.  I'll admit that I don't do enough, and I don't take 
 my own advice enough, but these people claim themselves (well, at least 
 when it's convenient) to be the "examples".   
 
        These vary same assholes are into the "number"/statistical facts.  
 A lot of them. These numbered facts are great for them, because they can
 make abstractions and twist things around and then nothing will get done.  
 However, I'm going defy this and give them a <GASP> thesis...one that's 
 based solely on a cold fucking hard FACT?...and here it is, plain and 
 simple: 
                            We are destroying ourselves!!!
 
        That's right geezers & Tots, we're doing the big "self-over-fuck".     
 Does that make you cringe?  Well, if your not one of those apocalyptic 
 bastards - it shouldn't.  I mean it's real spiritual and all to predict    
 the end of the world every few days, but it's tiresome.  And there's those   
 idiots that actually live by the premise that they can do whatever 
 destructive and wasteful thing they want, since "the world is gonna end    
 anyway." No you fuck, it's not.  Well, maybe in millions (or is it 
 billions?) of years when our sun burns up it's fuel and expands into a 
 "Big Red" and grows as big as the orbit of Jupiter... THEN the end will 
 come.  I guess if you wanted to take things to extremes then the end IS    
 coming, but I think that's a long enough time away to say that we are here    
 for a long while.  Ah, I'm sure some of you really uptight religious 
 idiots...er, I mean people...have caught me here as an atheist.  Well,   
 actually I'm not -- and I am...ok, so it's hard to explain and I won't even 
 attempt to do it here, but the idea that Jesus is coming along after we 
 shit ourselves is shitty in itself.  Shit, Shit, Shit, Shit.  Ahhh, now   
 that's out of my system...I'll continue.... The TRUE idea of the bible (a     
 book which I will respect, but never follow) is to do the same thing that    
 all religions TRY to do... make people happy (strangely enough, many people   
 forget this!).  But, let's get real now... What is in the church?  
 Condemnation, intimidation, stupid and unnecessary tradition, and of 
 coarse a lot and lot of guilt.  Does this sound like a way to make people 
 happy?            
 
        I'm getting off the already off-the-topic point here (read some of   
 Mr. Sandman's word's on the topic in his article: "The Freedom Philosophy"),   
 but the bible (on an abstract level - If you believe the bible on a literal    
 level your an total phucking moron<g>) says that there's a future where 
 Heaven is on Earth.  That idea is actually thinkable, and you don't have to   
 be Christian to believe it...I think Lennon said it best...that's right:   
 WORLD PEACE.  Ok, with some of these thoughts off my chest, I'm going to   
 tell you why the world is falling apart... and why we have to DO SOMETHING  
 ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT BESIDES SITTING ON OUR ASSES AND TALKING ABOUT IT 
 LIKE WE'VE DONE FOR 34+ YEARS.  Earth Day was real nice... but face it, 
 nothings happening...not enough people really care...Writing this I'm
 realizing that we really need some fucking change in the government.  
 AGHH!  I said the Clinton word... I don't want "change"... I want a total 
 fucking RESTRUCTURE!!              
 
        When we have a real government represented by the people then I'll    
 be happy...but the only government that will ever do this is NO government.   
 Self-Government... That's right... wonderful Anarchy.  Not the initial 
 image that someone may have of chaos.  TURE anarchy is a beautiful place.   
 It's a world where everyone has common sense and has SELF-controlled    
 morals.              
 
        Ok, I'm off the topic again... My actual point of writing this was   
 to talk about the environment... <REALLY!>... I'll get to it then, here's 
 a run down of five of the "more" dangerous things of what is happening...              
 
        HEY!!!  Put that Playboy mag away... I'm talking about something    
 IMPORTANT!  It's important to protect the environment at all times for 
 many reasons... I think one reason could be that the future of human 
 existence is at stake?  What do you think...?  Picture, if you will (and 
 if you don't... you WILL), the world in the far off year of 2030... 
 (Shit, I'll be FIFTY-FUCKING-YEARS old -- No, wait I forgot, I'm going 
 to kill myself at thirty...nevermind):            
 
        1) The amount of CLEAN water will be scarce -- if nonexistent -- due   
 to dumping.  No, not THAT kind of dumping.  I mean toxic dumping - you 
 know, companies that couldn't give a flying phuk and just dump shit 
 whenever...And the Oil-Spill rate will surely rise as it has been...That's 
 right, you'll be drinking up some dirty shit on those fine days... Maybe 
 toilet water will start to look good?            
 
        2) Yes, the O-zone layer (that thing with the big hole over Maine),   
 the thing that you never took seriously and told a million lamer jokes    
 about will haunt you.  By 2030, the Ozone layer will be so thin and the   
 heavily debated Greenhouse effect (Aside - note the opposition to the   
 existence of an unnatural greenhouse effect is made up primarily of 
 Republican Conservatives that only act up when there is a money 
 expenditure at stake) will be so intense that the Fucking POLAR CAPS will   
 be able to melt and thus will FLOOD most of the land areas across the    
 globe (Note: Anyone who is not a fisherman is fucked).            
 
        3) We will have no form of dependable energy by that point.  
 WAKE UP - Fusion does NOT exist and we are pissing away what limited 
 resources we have more and more everyday.  Does anyone fucking care?? 
 All we'll have left is the goddam Nuclear power plants... and if we used 
 them to power everything (and you can imagine how much power will be 
 needed in the year 2030, as it grows everyday) then there'd be so much 
 Nuclear/toxic waste we'd shit ourselves trying to put it somewhere... 
 and get this: It stays radioactive for something like a 
 Ka-Zillion-Schmillion-Trillion years...hell, the end of the world will 
 come before that stuff is safe.            
 
        4) Do you like animals...?  Well, if you do, then it's tough shit...   
 because by the year 2030 the only animals left will be a few cows, a few 
 hogs, a lot of cockroaches, and a FUCKING MOOSE.  At the current rate of
 extinction via the poacher fucks there will literally be one species of 
 animal becoming extinct every hour!!            
 
        5) Oh, and that li'l' thingy called the Rain Forest.  Ever hear of   
 it?  Well, fuckit, that thing won't annoy you anymore... that's right!     
 Nobody will have to hear anymore nagging people asking for money to save    
 those shrubs.  Of coarse we'll all be dead.  "Why would we be dead?" You    
 may have asked (Aside - Even if you didn't ask...you guessed it...I'm    
 gonna tell you...).  Well, see us humans...we need this funny thing called   
 air... and well, the Rain Forest counts as not one, not twenty, not 
 thirty-nine, but FORTY PERCENT of our world air supply (or WaS as I like    
 to call it<g>).  "So who needs forty, right?  We still got sixty...we'll  
 be fine..." you may say... But NONONONOPERDOODLES!  Remember that lil'    
 O-Zone thingy I mentioned earlier...we'll if that silly li'l' contraption    
 get's enough holes in it.. it kills off the big bulk of our WaS... The 
 Algae in the ocean.  Sucks, huh?     
      
      Shit.  We are fucked up, huh?  IS the end of the world coming?  Well, 
 I guess you want me to give you a few words to encourage you to go fight 
 the powers that be, huh?  Well, uh I don't got none.  Well, actually I do. 
 Sorta.  Do I sound confused?  These are confused times, though<g>.  I'll 
 stop rambling and say this:  GET INVOLVED!  It's only going to happen if  
 we let it.  That's right.  Don't preach world peace, Don't preach about 
 any glorious future, and DON'T preach about true anarchy if you don't do 
 shit about what's happening.  Educating yourself is neato, but that doesn't 
 do shit if you just sit there on your lazy ass.  Here's a few people of 
 the more INTERESTING people/agencies that you can contact:            
 
        1) To obtain a report on the largest releases of toxic chemicals in   
 the country, "The Top 500", call the National Wildlife Federation at    
 (202)7976800 or mail them: 
                The National Wildlife Federation          
                Backyard Wildlife Habitat Program                  
                1400 16th St. NW                          
                Washington, DC 20036-2266            
                
        2) You want to save paper and reduce that annoying stress to boot?   
 You can write this group to keep your name off all major mailing lists in    
 the country... Thus, they won't send you junk/shit mail.                          
                Mail Preference Service                          
                Direct Marketing Association                          
                6 E. 43rd St.                
                New York, NY 10017            
 
        3) Nag people.  Send a letter to the United Nations Environmental   
 Programme (Don't ask me why there's no "er" at the end of that...I guess    
 they just wanted to be weird) urging the UN to intensify discussion/action 
 on preserving the Rain Forest, among other issues.                   
                Mosfa Kamal Tolba (Sounds contagious)                       
                Executive Director                          
                UN Environmental Programme                           
                P.O. Box 30552                
                Nairobi, Kenya            

        4) Not only Hippies recycle!  Call the Environmental Defence fund   
 (you won't have to phreak it, the call is toll free) at 1-800-225-5333.   
 Ask the operator how much they weigh, their favorite color, what is on   
 their mind RIGHT NOW, and then (most importantly...I think) ask them to   
 send you a phree <evilgrin> recycling info pak (I left the "c" out for you   
 dumb K-Rads, who I would be surprised actually read this far into my    
 article).            
 
        5) Big Daddy-o Greenpeace:    
                Greenpeace USA, Inc.                         
                1436 U St. NW                          
                Washington, DC 20009       
                (202) 462-1177            

        6) Nag the shit out of the US Department of Energy.... Tell them   
 to shape up or you'll use some text files on them<or what's IN the text   
 files for a better reaction>.  You can also get the free cheesey lil' they 
 offerbook called: "Tips for Energy Savers"..blah!  That title makes me 
 want to murder a boy scout in cold blood.                          
                US Department of Energy                          
                Office of Public Affairs   <-------Shit, they have                          
                Washington, DC 20585               a whole office                          
                (202) 586-5575                     for THAT.            
                
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(c)opyexcusethemanyramblings Mogelian Productions
