
 '##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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  ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #326 !!
  #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS!  !!
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  ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Fuck Tibet"                             !!
  ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Zaff                               !!
 ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/11/98                                 !!
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        My attitude toward Tibet had been one of relaxed indifference of
 late.  What, after lightning struck a Tibetan Freedom Concert last
 summer, I thought that God himself had pretty well spoken on the matter
 and set things clear for once and for all as to where Tibet stands in
 the cosmic order.  But, sometimes, God just doesn't talk loud enough, it
 seems.

        Today, during Daria, there was a Levi's commercial in which two
 'friends' (read:  very smug womyn fashion victims) were sporting tatoos
 on their tummies.  "It is Tibetan for hello" one of them says, giggling.
 And that reminded me that Tibet, despite the good intentions of the
 People's Republic of China, remains one of the trendiest causes in the
 American suburbs.  But I sure don't see why.

        Religion you say?  Tibet is the birthplace of Many Important
 Eastern Religious Traditions.  But, if it is religion you want, I direct
 your attention to Jerusalem, the Middle East.  Christianity, Judaism,
 Islam--*all* very nice and important religions in their own right, and
 all born in the Middle East.  But you never see Billy Corgan drag his
 ennui drenched ass to Jerusalem to do a benefit at the Wailing Wall, or
 pleaing for the violence to stop among the Jews and the Arabs.  You can
 hardly heave a grenade in Jerusalem without blowing up a major landmark
 of vast religious significance, but kids in the burbs don't have
 "Yahweh" tatooed on their bellies, or wear "Free Mecca" tee shirts.

        I never grasped why Eastern religions were more trendy than
 Christianity, Judaism and Islam.  I mean, those three are *just as easy*
 for half-witted kids with too much time and money to fundamentally
 misconstrue as Buddhism or Hinduism.  Maybe easier!  Besides, as I have
 mentioned before, Jesus had nice abs whereas the Buddha in his
 traditional representation is a fat little bald man and it just seems
 like Jesus would play better with the 15 year old girls and their
 intellectual kindred who squawk about freeing Tibet.

        Maybe you want to talk about natural beauty in Tibet.  If you
 want beauty, though, just go a little further on down to Sri Lanka. 
 Lush, green forests, breathtaking hills, they have elephants for God's
 sake. Gorgeous nation which is itself rife with injustice, people
 blowing up each other right and left.  The terrorists there even go by
 the name "Tamil Tigers".  Sounds like a baseball team.

        Or if you want to talk about the sheer quality of oppression (or
 quantity for that matter) Tibet cannot hold a candle to other parts of
 the world, especially in Africa.  Take Rwanda.  Please.  Two tribes,
 apparently pissed off at their silly names (the Hoot Owls and the Toot
 Toys I think) took to each other with guns and machetes.  Huge
 carnage.  UN is in desperate need of help running the war crimes
 tribunal.  Prisoners piled up literally 100 to 150 to a room.  Where
 are the Beastie Boys?  Why aren't the Crust Brothers being indier than
 thou in Rwanda?

        The best I can figure, we are angry Tibet is oppressed because
 it is being oppressed by those mean old Chinese.  And why do we hate
 the Chinese?  Residual aspects of phony Beatlemania.  Remember when
 John Boy got all pissed at Mao because he realized that Maoism was
 *not* the idealistic utopian way of life that he thought Communism
 was supposed to be?

        That's right, years later, we are still reeling from the
 terrible effects of the British invasion and its impact upon our
 culture.  We have been pop-culturally conditioned to dislike the
 Chinese, which means disliking Tibetan "oppression" while we allow
 more serious offences all throughout the rest of the world.

        The solution is to ship all the Free Tibet kids to Jerusalem, or
 Rwanda, or Cambodia, or some other shitpit where they are crazy about
 torture and genocide.  It will teach them a thing or two.  Or just
 weed them out of the gene pool, which leaves more used beemers and Doc
 Martens and hackey sacks for the rest of us.

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 !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!       #326 - WRITTEN BY: ZAFF - 12/11/98 !!
