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   ooooo   ooooo  .oooooo.  oooooooooooo       HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #712
   `888'   `888' d8P'  `Y8b `888'     `8
    888     888 888      888 888             "Dr. Seuss, What A Pevert!"
    888ooooo888 888      888 888oooo8
    888     888 888      888 888    "                  by Six
    888     888 `88b    d88' 888       o               7/1/99
   o888o   o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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        My mother was big on reading when I was a kid.  She read to me and
 mysister every night.  Over the years we accumulated hundreds of childrens
 books.  Now that we are in our twenty's the time has come to clean out our
 closets and shelves and get rid of those childhood toys.  I was well aware
 of the graphic content of many old fairy tales prior to their revamping by
 Disney and the Brothers Grim, but never ever did I suspect dear old
 Dr. Seuss, until recently.  As my sister packed up her bedroom to move on
 to her new apartment, my mother and I boxed up the contents of her
 bookshelf for storage in the basement.  I picked up the book with the worn
 red cover and said out loud 'Look Green Eggs and Ham, I can't belive this
 is still in here!'  My mother, sister and I shared a chuckle and I
 retreated to my room to relive some childhood memories.  I thumbed through
 the first two or three little rhymes till I realized what the old doc was
 really trying to say! The Horror!  It starts off so innocent as the
 sinister Sam I am tempts his friend with his green eggs and ham. Did Seuss
 really mean green eggs and ham or was it a symbol.. for something else..
 Observe..

                Do you like green eggs and ham?
                I do not like them Sam I Am.
                I do not like green eggs and ham.
                I would not like them here or there I would not like them
                anywhere.
                I do not like green eggs and ham.
                I do not like them Sam I Am.

                Innocent right?  Just you wait..

                Would you could you in a car?
                Eat Them! Eat Them! Here they are!

                Would you could you on a train?

                Say in the dark? Here in the dark! Would you, could you, in
                the dark?

                Would you could you in the rain?

                Could you would you WITH A GOAT?

        How sick is that! A GOAT!  What the hell kind of things was
 Dr. Seuss trying to convince small children of?  Not to mention it gets
 even worse!  Once Sam I am convinces his friend to try the green eggs and
 ham, and his friend likes it.  So when people say that television has
 corrupted our youth and that it's sex and drug problems stem from that.
 You tell them they need look no further than our dear old pal Dr. Seuss
 and his drug pushin, goat sex wantin friend Sam I Am.

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 [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!        HOE #712 - WRITTEN BY: SIX - 7/1/99 ]
