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   ooooo   ooooo  .oooooo.  oooooooooooo       HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #692
   `888'   `888' d8P'  `Y8b `888'     `8
    888     888 888      888 888            "The Trenchcoat Mafia and Me"
    888ooooo888 888      888 888oooo8
    888     888 888      888 888    "                  by Neko
    888     888 `88b    d88' 888       o               6/18/99
   o888o   o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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        Hail hail hail hail hail hail.

        Bail bail bail bail bail bail.

        Tail tail tail tail tail tail.

        I'm really tired and I'm bored at work so I am going to not fuck with
 my shit in the database like I'm supposed to do and instead I am going to
 tell you how the Trenchcoat Mafia has adversely affected my life.

        Probably everyone knows about these two kids, Dylan and Eric, in some
 city in Colorado that went to their high school and shot their classmates.
 This school shooting rivaled the one last year where the kids pulled the
 fire alarm and then shot everyone as the exited for creativity and planning.
 This kind of shooting was much better than some lameass walk-into-a-school-
 and-pull-the-trigger shooting.  Which is actually what this shooting was,
 only they supposedly planned it.

        Anyway, less than 24 hours after the shooting occurred, a website
 went up at www.trenchcoat.org that parodied everything the media was saying
 about the Trenchcoat Mafia.  (I'd offer up a copy, but my personal copy
 disappeared when my hard drive crash, and the one I stored on my school unix
 account has had its permissions changed so I can't access it.)  They talked
 about the new KMFDM album, the Matrix, and their favorite place to buy
 trenchcoats, Burling Coat Factory. Any reasonable person with a brain could
 figure out that it was a parody, but we all know how many stupid people are
 out there.

        In any case, the trenchcoat.org website said "The man is trying to
 shut us down, we need mirrors!"  So I downloaded the html and put one copy
 up on my school account (http://www.iwu.edu/~jheisel/www.trenchcoat.org) and
 one up on my own web server (http://www.adkg.com/www.trenchcoat.org).  The
 copy I put on my webserver I listed on Altavista.

        Bad idea #1.

        Soon, I was getting over 1000 hits a day, just for the fake
 Trenchcoat Mafia homepage.  An average week for my web site is to serve
 about 1000-1500 pages.  I added the Trenchcoat.org page on a Thursday and by
 the time my statistics regenerated the next Sunday, I had served up over
 4000 pages.  The following week I served over 15,000 pages.  The week after
 that I server almost 5,000, and finally I got back to normal. 

        When I saw the number of hits the trenchcoat.org mirror was getting,
 I became jealous.  In two days it had gotten more hits than my entire
 website in its 6 months of existence.  That did not make me a happy camper,
 so I took the site down and wrote a rant about it
 (http://www.adkg.com/www.trenchcoat.org/rant.html).  I received dozens of
 emails (http://www.adkg.com/www.trenchcoat.org/emails.html), some praising
 my actions, some condemning them.  In any case, I decided to put up a link
 to the other mirror on my school account.

        Within 48 hours I got an email from a friend at my school.  He had
 received an email from a woman who informed him of my trenchcoat.org mirror,
 said she was passing my website on to the FBI and demanded that I be kicked
 out of school.  The message was sent to a dozen other people at my school,
 ranging from the president to the dean of students to the admissions office.
 That was Sunday.  I didn't know what was going to happen, but I knew nothing
 would happen until Monday.

        Monday night I come home and my sister tells me that D.G., my
 school's dean of students, had called for me.  At home.  Not at school.
 Home.  We were on break.  So I wondered if this had something to do with the
 trenchcoat.org shit.  She called me at home, after all, and left a message
 to come see her immediately when I came back to school Tuesday.  I checked
 my trenchcoat.org mirror on my school account and it said: Forbidden Your
 client is not allowed to access the requested object.  ... Oh shit.

        I drove down to school Tuesday and arrived around noon or so and
 found a sticky note on my door that told me to find D.G. and meet her.  When
 I finally did this, I found out that the media had found out about my
 trenchcoat.org mirror and had been calling my school all day Monday to try
 and get comments.  The dean wanted to warn me that they might call me at
 home.  She also wanted to tell me that the school did not give out my home
 phone number.  They never called, but I wish they would've.  I like playing
 with the media.

        She went on to tell me that the school was still deciding what--if
 any--action to take against me.  I told her I meant to take the site down,
 but I was at home and we had a firewall at school that prevented me from
 getting in and changing anything.  I also showed her the rant I wrote on my
 own site about why I took the mirror down.

        This all pleased her greatly and she acted very friendly towards me
 from that point on.  After a few days of suspenseful waiting she told me
 that the university would not be taking any action towards me.  And she
 added that she had shown my website to the PR department here, and they
 might contact me about writing copy for them.

        How fucked up is that?

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 [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!      HOE #692 - WRITTEN BY: NEKO - 6/18/99 ]
