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 +=            "Is poo-poo one word or two?"   - Nybar                     =+
      
 ... ..    ..       .      .

 YO BITCHES
 - joltcola

 we've picked up a new writer, the pilsbury fro boy. bf said he would write,
 but i haven't gotten his submission yet. oh well. 
                    -
 ... ..    ..       .      .
 
 TABLE OF CONTENTS
 1; yo bitches - joltcola
 2; the truth about republicans - nybar
 3; the night before lab - the pilsbury fro boy
 4; mission 29843198273 (the truth about republicans #2[yes, we're poupey, and
 we're not afraid to have two parts of a series in one 'zines])
 5; writer's bios

 ... ..    ..       .      .

                      THE TRUTH.. ABOUT.. REPUBLICANS!!!!!!  -Nybar..
           tI lla detrats kcab ni sb.. OH FORGET IT!
         I WILL NOT BE BRIDED INTO TELLING IT IN.. BACKWORDS WRITING!

        FIRST... THERE WAS COLONEL SANDERS! HE RULED HIS REALM BY MIND
       CONTROLLING CHICKENS!!!!!!! HE WAS LOVED BY NONE AND FEARED BY ALL!!
      THEN.. THERE CAME REBELLION!! NYBAR
       AND HIS MINIONS BROUGHT HIM DOWN
     .. BIG TIME!!! BUT HE STILL SECRETLY PLANNED!! REMEMBERING THE POWERFUL
    DAYS OF OLD, HE BOUGHT A CHICKEN FRANCHISE!!!!! Then, he put his mind
   controlling additives in certain chickens. The ones which would reach
  important people. It made them vote against good sense. They formed a
   council. THE COUNCIL
    OF THE THEM!!! It's nerve center includes..
    The money man, Walt Disney. The power handeler.. Richard Nixon himself.
      The hidden members... JFK and Elvis.. (they're deaths were faked, then
     they were brought before the council.) there funnel, Clinton, and the
    puppetmaster Colnel Sanders. They formed a new party, republicans, with
   ease. I control resistance. I have on my side, Joltcola (worthless, but
   helps me write this `zine,) Snakeface, my best
    field agent, and a
   brilliant general/politician. Mr.Mojo, intelligence commander. He runs
  5 tabloids (which are true) and he has recently gotten the info of the
  leadership of the Council of the Them. Then, there is The Pillsbury Fro
  Boy. His fro is so big, it has 5 major
  cities in it. He is my power broker.
 He supplies the men for my operation (called STEMAN, IN YOUR HEAD's...
 little 4 armed creatures who live in his head.) The world is in a state
   of constant trouble. We managed to take out one of they're best people
  recently (Nixon.) Still.. we are fighting a losing battle. The nigh
 endless supply of Ste-Men is running out. We need new agents. The Council
 is about to end this file, they are coming for me. Please.. NO!!!! NOT YET!!
 AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 HAHHAHAHAHAHA! I LOVE LIFE IN THE FAST LANE! <sounds of gun shots>..


                          FIN?

 ... ..    ..       .      .

 The Night Before Lab
 - The Pilsbury Fro Boy

 this was written by nybar and joltcola's brother, the pilsbury fro boy.
 it's about conditioning rats (based on the night before christmas).
 wolf hall is where class is held, and B.F. Skinner is a pioneer in the
 field of conditioning rats to do your bidding. 

 ==POUPEY== <---- divider

 'Twas the night before lab;
 Class had just been let out

 All the rats 
 They were stirring
 Because they wanted out

 To their boxes
 We took them
 And placed them with care

 In hopes that
 B.F. Skinner soon
 Would be there

 The students were nestled
 In their small little cells
 While the rats went to the bathroom
 It emitted a smell

 My labmates
 In their kerchiefs
 And me with my FR0

 The 2nd day
 Of shaping our rats we did go

 When outside of McKinely there arose such a clatter
 I jumped from my cubical to see what was the matter

 Over to Wolf Hall i sped in a dash
 Climed up the stairs and tripped over the trash

 The rain from the 
 Street that I
 Saw from afar
 Gave a glint to the street
 That waxed of film noir

 The sight i then saw it did knock me flat
 Spome old guy on skates pulled along by eight rats

 Could it be Santa Clause?
 No; this guy was thinner
 And i know in a minute it must be B.F. Skinner

 More rapid than field mice
 Because conditioned they came
 And he hooted and hollered and called them byname:
 "Now Jerry! Now Speedy! Now Ralph S.! And Micky! 
 On Algernon! Sabastian! Pinky! and Minny!
 To the top of the building
 To the top of Wolf Hall
 Now scurry and scamper and dash away all!"

 As ungraded papers berfore a whirlwind do fly
 When out the window students throw them,
 Mount to the sky
 So the the top of Wolf Hall his Rats they flew
 With a bag full of pellets
 And B.F. Skinner, too

 And than in an instant on the roof i did hear
 The scratching and scraping of little feet drawing near

 I hid in the corner close to the ground
 As B.F. broke through the window
 Making quite a loud sound

 He slipped on the tile
 And fell on his ass
 His close they were ruffled and cover with glass

 A bag full of food pelletes and previous tests
 He cluthced in his arms held close to his breast

 With a pair of thick glasses,
 A coat and a tie,
 And a receding hair line
 I know by and by;
 That this guy was out there 
 Which made me afraid
 But i knew if he helped us we'd get a good grade

 He fed all the Rats while through the darkness he lurked
 And than Cical came in and said "Get out of here, jerk!"

 Skinner's eyes grew nearly as wide as a grape
 As he sped up the emergency fire escape

 He slipped on his skates 
 Which indeed were quite big
 As his Rats scampered off sort of doing a jig

 But as his rats pulled him off i did hear him say
 "Opereant conditioning shapes behavior as a sculptor shapes clay"

 ... ..    ..       .      .

                             Mission 50235 -Nybar
            This is a modified report of our biggest success since the
           original de-throning of Colonel Sanders. It is the real account
          of what happened to Richard Nixon.
          <HELLO MY NAME IS BRAKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!>
          -----------------------------------------------

       Nybar was reading the ste-man in you head reports. Mixed reports.
      The Pillsbury Fro Boy (AKA BraveHair) was training rats to do the
     duties of Ste-Men.. and the Council of the Them (AKA THEY) had taken
     our secondary base.. complete with 500,000 good men.. ste men. It paled
    in comparison next to what Nybar < I AM TALKING IN THE THIRD PERSON!! >
   , Mr. Mojo, and Snakeface were going to attempt. They were going to blow
    the lid off of The Council of the Thems main source of political power
    at the time. Pretty boy Richard Nixon himself.

       -------------------------------------------------------------
             ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ .. SNORE!!!!!!
        ------------------------------------------------------------
           The first few parts went fairly smoothly. Mr. Mojo
         Overrided the security lasers, Snakeface took out the guards
        (by biting them.. lethal immediatly.) The real trouble started when
       I confronted Richy. He was prepared for me. I walked into the room..
      and saw a.. GIANT DEATH ROBOT!!!!!! It started shooting missiles at me
      .. while saying "EVEN IF YOU TAKE ME.. YOU WILL NEVER STOP THE WEB
     DECENCY ACT!!!!!". for the missiles, I simply dodged. One of them, using
    my high velocity repeller <neat name.. isn't it?> and shot it back at him
  , making a hole big enough for me to dump a bucket of water into, shorting
 his circuits. From there.. it was fairly simple to beat him to death.

                         FIN <damn fish>
 ....  ..    ....     .....        ......       .........

           FORIN <Joltcola is teaching me to be elete> STORY
          One day I was pawing through a foriegn language book.
         It vas neat. So.. I saw that it said popah meant butt, and dinazar
        means dinasour. So I walked up to joltcola and said "You Dinazar's
      Popah!!"
         ()_/-/---/---/-----/------/--------/---------/----------/-----/_()
        He.. not understanding.. said "AND PROUD!" Then I started laughing
       . Then he started laughing. Then a big fat calf walked in and started
      laughing. It was beautiful. Then.. I became a real boy.  
                          Fin <forin!!>

 ..... .... ..      .     ..
 writer's bios - JOLT FUCKING COLA and nybar

 we're HoE and dto posers[tm], we're doing bios for all our writers. 

 nybar - (by joltcola)
 comin' from the mean streets of delaware this k-cool cat spends his
 time calling bbs's and playing muds. every once in a while he'll write a
 hilarious issue of poupey. he's convinced that the appocolypse is coming and
 that cats will be the only survivors. sometimes he lays in bed at night
 wishing he were an elf.
 Turn-ons: cats
 Turn-offs: republicans

 joltcola - (by nybar)
     from the stinking suburbs of newark.. DE, come gansta boy JC.
    He enjoys going on IRC channels with the name "Bigtits"
   and laughing at cyber-sex. he is obsessed with infomercials.. and cheese.
    the cats are beating him up all the time. he is conviced that the
    apocolypse will never happen.. BUT IT WILL DAMNIT!


   Turn-ons: naked men
   Turn-offs: naked men he knows
    
  Pillsbury Fro Boy -(by nybar)

      The brainchild of a mad invenetor working at pilsbury central, he was
      cursed with dangerously large hair. he was kicked out of his birth
      place (the lab.) since then, he has invited everyone to come and stay
      in his hair. He has gone through a period of refinement, from which
      he emerged COMPLETELY CRAZY!! (and with bigger hair)

     Turn-ons: Cookie Dough
     Turn-offs: Short hair

 .... ..............         .. ..            .         ..

 Fat Bald and proud
 jolt ... cola
                                                      
 i'm addicted to flinstones vitamins!@# ayieeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i like to play
 ping pong....... with goggles on. "jc, play better" inspirational isn't it?
 if you're ever going to make a 'zine remember puncation is your enemy! gorf.
 nybar is looking over my shoulder. he wears sweatpants a lot. they're blue.
 MMMMM I LIKE HOMEFRIES. that many could kill you@!# sigh. heheheh :) :) :)
 heheheh !!!!!!! hehehe :) lish!!!!!!!!!!!1   florm gorf hoggle.
  ...   .. .
 the end

 poupey #3 - sponsored by bF
