
     cOOL KEwL Ko0L quewl COOoL k00l KOol c00l KUewl kco0l CO0l KOOL KEWL
     CoOl Kewl ko0l quEwl COooL k00L Kool C00L KuEWl kCO0L cO0L kOOL kEWL
     cOOL KEWl KO0l -------------------------------------- CO0l Kool Kewl
     CooL kEWL kO0l !       The HiPpIe dIpPy klub        ! CO0l KOOL Kewl
     coOl kEwl kO0L !             PReEZenTz:             ! Co0l KOoL keWL
     Cool kEwl KO0L !                                    ! cO0L KoOL keWL
     CooL kewL ko0L !      a profoUnd EXpOSE on tHe      ! co0L kOoL KEwL
     cool KeWl ko0l !    514 (FivEOnEFOUR) ArEA CoDe.    ! CO0L KoOl kEwL
     COOL kEWL Ko0l !             l0ser T0wn             ! Co0l koOl KEwl
     cOol keWL KO0l -------------------------------------- cO0L KoOl Kewl
     COoL kEwL Ko0L qUeWl CoooL K00L kOOl c00l kUEwL KCo0l cO0L kOol kEWL
     cool Kewl ko0l QuEWl COOOL k00L koOl c00l kUewl kCo0l cO0L KOoL KEwl

     --------------------------------------------------------------------
     waRNinG (reaD tHIS asSHOLe): The AuthoRs wiLL remaiN aNOnymouS FOr
     THe mOMENt. moRE detaiLs will APPeaR in A FUTUre rELEase, WItH mORE
     DeTAils, MoRE maYHem, aND FUlL SiZE coLor PiCTUres (HuH?).
     --------------------------------------------------------------------

     - paRt W0ne - AN inTWodUCTiOn:

    weLcOMe to Da SeCUNd IsSue O' Da gREaTesT serIEs evEr WitTEN. BUt WHo
 rItes diS InCREDIBlE MastepiEcE OF LItteratuRe? WeLl if yOu'rE t0o st00pId TO
 fiGuR' dAT oUt, ThEn y0Uz Don'T DeSErvE TO kn0W. Now, A lOt o' YOu cOmPlaINed
 About dA !<-RaD WritTIng. wElL TUFF LuCK L0seR. I gUEsS onLY DA wEAl elYTes
 CAN WEAd dis FILE. yOU Know, DA K-ko0L chUmS who wriTE lIKE dIS eVeWYWhErE On
 DA BOardZ. dIs IssUe woN'T coNtAIn Any HaCKS or LOSer LIstS, just plaIN OLd
 StowIs o' gO0D OlD 514, L0sER t0WN usa. 0oPs, wE BE In KanaDA. bY DE Way, if
 YOU cAn'T hanDlE WAt DiS SAys, GET L0ST LOSER. In dIs issue, tHE l0sER
 sTaTUte tri0, mOre on tERRor 'N' TORMents, Da pCBoReD cwazE, anD MUCh m0RE...
 alSo, noTIce tHE k00L kodING in dIs onE. 100 purCeNT QEdIT. WeaL G00D nO?


     - PaRt T0O - dA WeaL elyTes o' L0seR t0wn:

    wElL EVewY Body iN L0seR T0wN HAS bean WaiTing Fo dIs ONE. wHat? Da new
 K-rAD 0 milLiSecuNd waRezwOLf BoaRD? no! dA New K0OL fIbeR 0PTIc, UNtrASsaBLE
 pbX? nO! yOu GUEsSEd IT, Da LonG AWaITED WeleasE O' THe StatUTE, L0seR t0WNs
 OwN K-K00l eLyTe MAGAZINe. YUp, 416 gOT da iNFinITY, 604 GoT pwOpAgANda, sO
 wE gEtS tw0o l0sErZ tWINg tO RiTE A MaG FuR 514. YES, pr. sinIStur, And dr.
 cwiPpleD (0oPs, DR. CWIPPEN). W0w, a DR. and a PR.! DEese GUys musT be SMArT.
 wEll WROng agaIN. DEEsE guYS Are thE wEAl K-K00l ElYteS O' L0SER t0WN. dEese
 gUys are BEyONd SMart, dEesE gUys be soupa k-rAd! ANYwAyz, Da coDINg wAs
 RIPped ofF fWoM da IllumINatUs magaZINe (aNother k-K00l PIWATe waReZ CRAPPEr)
 wit a fEW faNcy tUrBO toOlkIt FUNctiOns ToSSEd in, AnD a KRAd COmPwESSiON
 SchEmE: rENamING A zipFile To A .DAt. W0W, kodInG SuPreme. aNyWays,
 eVeRYTHIng in diS thing SuCkeD haRD, FRoM DA ArtICLEs to THe GrapHiX, to DA 4
 yeAR OLD gaME Weviews. Da gAmE has ALREaDy BeEN LEechED ANd plAyED 0ne
 mIlLi0n TIMEs, WatS dA pOiNT o' WEVIEwing it? jUst fILls UP A mENu I gueSs.
 n0W lET's LooK At a WeaL eLYte boreD, DA lAb. WItTEn wITH k-k00l leTtERs. Da
 LAB, riGhT. MoRE liKe dA pLAce WHErE We teStZ DA FLAVourING Of shakE 'n'
 bakE. DIs boARD is A Soupa SekRut OnE So DON't mess wIt it. IT's elYTe.
 ESPeCiAlly siNCe 75% o' THE Lo0SeRs (0oPS AgAin, YOoSeRS) ARE LAmE locaL
 pAyiNG onEs. cAN YOU Say B00tLEggEr? OH, BuT IT bE a FAiRliGht disTWO sITe.
 wElL THE ONLY TWo FLT MeMBeRS ON HaveN'T PoSTEd a siNgul MESSagE yET. eXCEpT
 k-k00L CwIpPLEd, bUT We GEt TO im laTUR. YA, DA ONLy tinG DIs BoArED
 dISTrIBUTeS Is THE FEEliNg oF diSGUst as i wAnt to v0MiT eaCH TIME I LOG Ont0
 It aND See da l0cAl WAreZ pUpPIES WarRInG oVEr If os2 is bETTA DAN wINDOws.
 wh0 CArEs! nexT wE HavE tHE k-k00L CoUwiER CwiPPen. mAn, dIs guy kEEpS
 PosTing DAt hE goT a lifE outsidE OF dA bBSinG. i gUeSS hE Be Da only w0ne.
 he iS mY hER0. W0NdER wY He gOt A FiveHuNdrEddoLLAr m0DumB IF hE nEVEr BbSeS?
 GueSs hE BE an ElyTe aLsO. dEn NUKe weNT AWaY dis wEEk. i BEt yA daT the pR.
 aNd dA dR. WIll Say IT is BEc0SE O' de StAtUTE, wIGTh? let'S juST Wait and
 SEE. AnD DIS CwipPen gUY. hE bE the Best cause hE hAS ALl Of MCi sPRiNTErs
 OLd STUFF. JUST LiKe an ELYTe To USe stuFF sOmeONe elSE wrOTE, and den TAke
 da KREdiT F0R IT. N0T gO0D cWipPEn.


     - PArt t0O - terror 'n' ToMEnTs uPDAtE:

    weLL, TNt IS BAcK Up pOlluting dA AIR of L0SeR t0Wn ONCe AgAIN. BUT dEEsE
 gUYS ARe So ST00pId, deY haVe nOT a ClUe WhO hACked Da BOarD. Duh?! Can we
 SAy "IDIOT". daTs i-d-i-O-T. eye, deE, eYe, oh, tee. ANywAYS, SEe If DiS GUy
 sTiLL BE Up vEwy lONG. anODeR idIot is HIS Go0D fwIEnd psYchIc dOnuT, sYsOP
 o' sHoUT AT thE deVIL. oOoO, A tuff nAME. I'm sCAReD. mommmmmy. dIs gUy IS a
 k-RAD hACkER WhO OnLY aCCEPTs k-K00L hakerz AnD PhREAkErZ. t0o BaD he iS dA
 SySuP o' dA BOaRD, siNce he don't know shIt imSelF. oh, ANd He Be pART oF a
 K00L nETWURK. DA uSn NET. wIt 3 k00L Hp boArDS. ALl In L0Ser t0wN. aNd dIs
 k00L net HAs ABoUt 12 bASES, hALf oF which arE EMPTY, THE OTHer haLf Wit
 UnDEr 20 PosTS. AND tHIs Net gets abOuT 1 PosT per wEeK AT Da MaXIMuM.
 anYwayZ, KaLl It And sEe yOUrselvEZ. i hOpE Dat SGT. rATtLeBread And psYcHic
 DONUt lEAVe Da m0dUmB SCeNE fASt, SO DAT L0sEr T0WN L00kS lEsS Like A
 pLaygwOund FoR CHILdWen.


     - Part tREE - pcbOred BOArdS:

    it IS 1992, AnD it SEEmS daT telEGArd bOARDS aRe diSsApEARIng. But tAkING
 THErE pLACE is da K00l PwoGRAms of WENEGAde anD pCBoReD. weNEGADe suCks, aS
 was clEarLY deMONstraTed BefoRe. now, 0n TO pCbOrED. dIs PRoGRAM WoULDn'T bE
 so BAd iF Deese dUMb SysOPs KnEw H0W to SET IT UP. dA fiRSt w0Ne Or tWO
 BOarDs RUNning IT wEre 0k, BuT DEn thE l0CaL L0SerS OF L0sEr T0WN got a HoLd
 0F It, aNd DeESE f0OlS dOn'T havE A cLue HOW TO SET iT UP. gET WEal lAMERs,
 go SEt up wWiv, someTHinG you MIgHT BE abLe t0 HaNdlE. diS G0ES ALong WIT aLl
 da otheR cRAcKED VERsIOns oF CeLeRITY, VisIOn aNd a h0sT Of otHEr UNreGisTerd
 BbS sOfTwareZ. Y0U ALL deSERvE TO frY.


     - ParT F0r - PcP, The NEw L0sEr T0wn JoKe:

    diS WAs CaPtuREd oFF a boaRD in L0sEr T0wN:

   --

 Msg #: [###/###]                        Base: xxxxxxxxxxxxx
 Date : Wed 03 Jun 1992  7:40a           Stat: Public
 From : Satan #YY
 To   : Mr. Anonymous #XX
 Title: Message title
 Reply: This message is a reply to ####

 *** Quoting Mr. Anonymous #XX to Satan #YY ***

 MA> What's PcP ???

   It's a group that I am associated with.  The details cannot be
 discussed, I'm sorry.  But I can tell you this, PcP is dedicated to helping
 out (irradicating the BBS comunoty of unwanted people and boards).  We also
 are involved in reprograming scanable virii to make them worse and
 non-scanable. Last thing I can say, PcP is also involved in locating, hacking
 and distribution of PBX numbers.

   If you want more information, call S.H.A.R.P. Platoon 2 at 626-8668.
 That board is PcP's WHQ.  Later!

                             °±²  Satan  ²±°  [PcP]

   --

    n0W, Let's AnalYse dis MeSsAge. IT'S sOuppa sekrut, s0 wE caN'T Talk
 ab0UT it In pubLIk, rIGhT SATan? repRoGWaMminG ViRiI! iF w0NE oF dEm CoULd
 PwOgram, ThAT MiGHT heLP. locATing, HACkIng AnD diStributING PbX NuMBeRS! wHo
 haS EVer g0tTEn A pbx fr0M pCP? no 0Ne. aNd aS F0R eRRADicatinG uNwAntEd
 boarDs and pEopLe, WelL starT BY Erradicting PCp, It's MEMBurS aNd It'S ONly
 BOrEd, ThAT sUckS BY DA WaY.

                                   ---/---

    WElL DaT's It F0r DIS isSUE. IF YOu WoULd LIkE TO WeACH ME, to RAg Ab0ut
 DIs FiLE, 0R To SubMiT an ARtIklE fOR Dis, DEN lEAVe Me A puBliK pOSt
 soMewheRE, AnD i'LL GET baCk to Ya. You cAn kALl mE mR. K00l K-RaD ElYTE
 FuNKY d0Ode. GwEEts g0 To: y0u kN0W whO yOu GuY's ArE. SpOns0Red By Shake 'N'
 BaKE. We D0N't CheK da SpeLLinG.

                              -EoF-06/07/92-EOf-
