
 '##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
  ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #369 !!
  #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS!  !!
  ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "What Really Happened at Christmas"      !!
  ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Avenger                            !!
 ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/22/98                                 !!
 !!========================================================================!!

        A long time ago, g0d was bored.

        "y0, uh, g0d.  the people want a savior and shit," said an angel.

        g0d scratched his head and thought.  there was this chick named
 mary that he was going with at the time, and he decied to have her pop
 out a baby, and it would be the savior that the people wanted.

        so, uhm, he gave it to mary.

        9 months later, mary was walking around somewhere in israel. 

        "man..israel sure does suck." she said.  suddenly, her stomach
 started to shake violently.  

        "that goddamn g0d.  i guess i'm having his baby and stuff.  so,
 uh, phear."

        anyway, after she had the baby, some werid fucking stars
 appeared in the sky.  some mogi came wandering along, wondering why the
 fuck the stars were so bright.

        "hey, bitch.  turn those fucking stars off.  i'm trying to haq 
 something," said a mogi.

        "whoa.  mogi?  like, mogel?  are you his ancestors or something?
 do you guys read h0e?"

        "guh.  you dipshit.  we own h0e.  except now it's called
 'hormonally overcharged ethiopians.'"

        "so, did you bring gifts or something?  this is g0d's s0n.
 chr1st."

        the mogi handed her some sand, a back issue of cDc, and a piece
 of murmur's burnt flesh.

        "what the fuck is this?!  you lame-asses!  i want real gifts!"

        the mogi shrugged and walked off.  mary read the issue of cDc,
 and was inspired to make a bomb.  she later blew her stupid fucking
 head off.

        g0d was pretty pissy.  he whined that chr1st was their savior,
 and stuff would be elite from now on.  instead, it was more like h3ll.

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 !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!    #369 - WRITTEN BY: AVENGER - 12/22/98 !!
