
1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask...
2 ******************* INSTALLED: 26 NOV 84 ********************************
3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System)  Mike Day System operator
4 *************************************************************************
5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION
6                     PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM.
7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned
8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public.
9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is
10 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be
11 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved)
12 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the
13 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the
14 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace
15 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up.
16 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
17 ************************************************************
18 """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
19 I BELIEVE THE COMMENT IS "AT THE TOP!"
20 """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
21 """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""POOH BEAR""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
22 
23 
24 "#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"
25 
          SAMMY TWIT WAS HERE!!!

26 2#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"#"
27 WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE MESSAGES. HAS THE SYSTEM BEEN PURGED?
28 && && &&
29 It does look that way...
30 MiG: does he drive worse than I do? At least I've never run anyone over...
31 (I think.)
32 && && &&
33 The Poet was having trouble hanging on to his perceptions. Things started out in three dimensions, alright, but
34 what appeared to be natural lines rapidly shifted before his eyes into crystalline fractal shapes extending off
35 into the n-dimensional spaces of this reality. Perhaps extending into realities beyond. Strange, he thought, it
36 usually takes at least half an evening's drinking before things look like this... A buzzing grew insistently in his
37 ears, rising to an agonizing level as he raised his gaze to the sky and saw slicing through the unseen spaces...
38 "The golden Eagle!" The words exploded from him, startling his companions (whose attention was somewhere else 
39 entirely). They were less startled, but more disturbed, when he then stiffened and keeled over onto the Piper.
40      && The Mad Actor &&
41 <+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>
42    Dear MIG:
43           According to her last entery, Kathy also asked for some hints on
44  ZORK.
45                          ASP.
46 <+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>+<+>
47 GOODNESS!  Drive B only has 461 lines on it, and it's already been demoted.
48 I guess Mikey must be planning on being OUT for a while?
49 			_innocent bysitter_
50 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
51 I have come across a rather bizarre catalog. It's for the SOF EXCHANGE.
52 Among the knives, guns, camo fatigues, etc they have slogan T-shirts.
53 A list follows:
54 Peace through Superior Firepower
55 Death Rides a Pale Horse
56 Special Forces - Living by chance, Loving by choice, Killing by profession
57 Marines - Let me win your hearts and minds or I'll burn your damn huts down
58 Participant Southeast Asia Wargames - 2nd place
59 Visit Lebanon, Help a Syrian meet Allah
60    (backed with: "Hey, we just stepped in some Shiite.")
61 Grenada: When you care enough to send the very best
62 Communism is CONTRA-Banned
63 C.A.T.T. - Central America Training Team
64 
65   (Pity, they don't have my all-time favorite: Kill 'em all, let God sort 
66 'em out)
67                       Ian MacHinery
68 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
69 ::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::11/26::::::::::20:41::::::::::::O O::::::::::
70 Ian: bring that along to PorSFiS Saturday (Yes boys & girls, it happens
71 again this Saturday at the Mult. Cnty. Library at 2 PM); I'd like to
72 take a look at it.  Some of those T-shirts tickle my fancy (I won't say
73 which ones, I'm not in the mood to defend myself against hordes of angry
74 whatevers here).
75 And if you happen to have any extra archive disks by then......?
76 And by the way - are you related to Francis X. MacHinery?  Your position 
77 as head of the Network and his as hereditary head of the FBI are somewhat
78 similar.  (name that 'tune'...)
79 Given the presence of a certain party, do you suppose it would be a good
80 time to pick up on our McKane story again? (Where it left off, of course..)
81 babble babble babble babble babble babble babble babble babble babble babble
82 oooops! I mean
83 :::::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::voyeur:::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::
84 Voyeur: I have on good authority that Ian's branch of the family was
85 disowned by Francis's branch (something about selling the Jupiter Bridge..)
86     As for archive disks, I should have 2 - 3 boxes of them back by Sat.
87 (& yes, I'm sure Mr. MacHinery will bring the catalog)
88 L'homme: As for archive disks, for any sessions after the current one, 
89 could you put files FOUR (4) to a disk? And in *ORDER*?
90 _____________________________Leonard_______________________________________
91 UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
92 So there we were levitated above the floor of the citadel by a glorious
93 ring of light.  This is the feeling I h
ad always associated with the
94 phrase "gyre and gimble in the wabe."  Except that we were wafting over a
95 sea of little rotund creatures who, no longer lulled by the music, were
96 baring their cute little fangs.  Milchar scouted out possible exits through
97 time, space, and whatever other dimensions he commands.
98 (pause for switch to present tense.)
99 Suddenly the tide of globuloids is galvanized into quivering attention. A 
100 large unhappy creature strides into the hall with a retinue of wide-eyed
101 smurfs.  They fear him.  He despises them.  The more they try to please
102 him, the more he holds them in contempt.  The Blue Demon is bored with his
103 conquest of this cuddly horde and if there were an easy way to do it, he
104 would casually annihilate them.  This is sad, but we have our own problems 
105 to consider.  
106 Blue Demon has seen us. He smiles.  Company, at last.  A challenge. Fresh  
107 meat.  He seats himself in a lush chair and smugly awaits the dissipation
108 of our spell.  We swim about helplessly as Milchar thumbs through his spell
109 collection muttering, 2here is pellxszfaalert189:0phgtirirowpw@
110 
111 muttering "where is spell alert when youneed him?
112 (This is not a code)
113 We dropped to the ground at Blue Demon's feet just as Milchar yelled,
114 "Of course, of course, we knew it all along!"
115 "Thank you, my little pilgrims, for collecting all the parts of the neck-
116 lace for me," simpered Blue Demon and put his huge hand around 
117 Milchar's neck."
118 Knew what all along?
119 UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Lila UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
120 
121 ***********************************************************************
122 I'm slightly disapointed, I had hoped to find some helpfull hints so
123 i could dtop tearing my hair out when sitting down at adventure again.
124 Zork is worse, I have managed to get the painting upstairs, and kill
125 the troll, not much else. help!!! but what did I find? what I expected
126 a new disk.  I think there is a cure for the smurfs and a way to get the
127 smurfs to go against "papa". but I'm not telling!!  Ill be baccck later
128 with another "thrilling" chapter.
129 *********************************kathy************************************
130 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/
131 Wasp:White Anglo Saxon... My country is the U.S., my aftershave is blitz 
132 dark, my computer, SV328. My skin colour? depends on how much welding I do.
133 I have yet to find a Vic-20 user who doesn't have a better machine, write a
134 decent program. Nor have I seen one who enjoys his Vic-20 ever input any-
135 thing of great import. Any Vic-20 lovers out there care to disprove me?
136 Asp:Oops! thanks for setting me forward.
137 CDP:EEK! what an enjoyable evening, lets do it again sometime? We can get 
138 into more and better Microcode. 
139 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?  ? ? ? ? ~ ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/MiG/? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?  ? ? ?/
140 *************************************************************************
141 HMMMMMM
142 **********************.**************************************************
143      As we speak, Leo and Ontho are circling the northern wasteland of
144 Iceland watching for strange things that go "FLASH" in the night, err
145 or day, depends..
146 **************************************************************************
147 
148 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
149 >> ALL ALLOWED <<  Wow, that's a change...  I guess a couple of people
150 have had a change of thinking.
151 Prometheus: Would you happen to be one of the people that got to see a
152  private showing of `Star Trek III...' at ten o'clock the day it opened
153  at the JB Cinema? I was there also...
154 Voyeur: Since you were the last to bring up PorSFiS, is its meeting a
155  regular occurance?
156  And is the M.C.L. you mentioned the one downtown?
157 
158 Yarn Weavers of The INN:  Is it just my imagination, or is there more than
159  one person sharing the by-line to the same story?  Every time I read another
160  installment of what seems to be the same story, there's a different name pinned
161  to the bottom line of it all. [` I'm so confused! ']
162 The Doctor: Does the name Lady Romanadvoratrelunder mean anything?  If not
163  then it would be pointless to ask: Which re-generation?
164 To all: The young Master West should be on his way soon as probably only a
165  weekly installment from here on; I still need to consider alternate paths.
166 Three cheers for poetic license! 
167 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     --->Sondargaard     ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
168 
169 ***************************************************************************
170 FYI: SONDARGAARD, YES IF YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT THE STORY CURRENTLY 
171 EMPLOYING SMURFS, BLUE MEANIES ACTUALLY AND SOME 3/5 CARDS? I PERSONALLY
172 AM NOT INVOLVED WITH THAT ADVENTURE, BUT SEVERAL OTHERS ARE.
173 ***************************************.***********************************
174      Meanwhille back at the "ranch", Alex is starring up into the night
175 sky, giving his thoughts to the air. He had grown quite attached to Leo
176 and hoped she would endure the mission well. He could console himself in
177 knowing he passed on his knowledge to her with the best of his ablities.
178 And her test would also be his test of teaching. Sigh.. As he turned and
179 walked back to the shelter, he meet the old woman who offered her support.
180 No words were exchanged, but they clasp hands and went inside.
181     The sun was beginning to break and Leo wiped her eyes with the inside
182 of her mitten. the deck of the disk was covered with a fine coat of ice
183 that made moving about quite dangerous. Ontho was stirring too. Looks like
184 both of them had fallen asleep on the job. (tsk tsk!)
185 ***************************kathy********************************************
186 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
187    Milchar & Co. -- sorry I've not had time to contribute much lately, but
188 I'm up on a deadline at work (known as 16 hr days, 7-day weeks).
189 I'll try to help more when I can.  Keep it going -- it's a pretty good 
190 adventure so far!
191 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
192 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
193 I barely had enough time.  I yelled, "NARTQ RLOOJF!"  A small ball of light appeared in my right hand, and I threw it
194 at the beast and ducked.
195 The ball travelled in a long arc, then decended down into the beast's eyes.  The ball disappeared, but from the look of
196 the demon he wasn't too happy about what had happened to him.  A brilliant light that close to his eyes had blinded him
197 temporarily.   #Let's regroup, and plan out our defense from this thing.  I have a small idea, but I'd like to hear 
198 from the rest of you first.  He'll be busy with trying to see for a little while.#
199 I looked about and tried to see what else existed here besides a huge demon and more crystal.  Hmm... the citidel 
200 was much more close to us now than before.  And the little blue things were nowhere to be seen, although they could be
201 heard (to the west).  I realized just how tired I was after all this effort.  #How about we find a good spot to rest 
202 for a while, after we get a good distance from this thing?#
203 +++++++++++++ Milchar ++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 06:47am / 11/27/84 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
204 ::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::11/27::::::::::08:19::::::::::::::O O:::::::::
205 Sondgaard: correct on both counts.  PorSFiS is the Portland Science Fiction
206 Society, and meets every other Saturday at 2 PM at the Multnomah County Library
207 downtown on 10th. It is also an informal BackWater meeting (see what strange
208 faces lurk behind these even stranger personas).  And Yes, some of the stories
209 here are multi-authored.  The one about the smurfs is being written in
210 various amounts by Milchar, bard, piper, Lila, L'homme.
211 Kathy: West from the Troll room is the maze.  Gather up all the junk you can
212 carry, then enter.  Drop a piece in each room, then start mapping
213 (which way(s) can I go in each room - N,S,E,W,NE,NW,SE,SW,U,D).  It takes
214 a while, but there are at least three reasons to figure out the maze.
215 :::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::voyeur::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::
216 {  ^+/* ---------------- ^+/* ---------------- */+^ ---------------- */+^   }
217      "Sometimes this place is like an oak tree in summer." Mez mumbled to no
218 one in particular.
219      "That doesn't make any sense at all", remarked the person with long
220 silver hair at a nearby table, "I don't suppose you'd care to explain?"
221      "Easy, there may be 'twittering at the top' but there's a great deal of
222 substance beneath, however, not all of it is readily visible."
223      "Oh, talking in riddles again, right?"
224      "Not at all, it's just that things are not always what they seem."
225      "Perhaps you might give a few examples. Would that be possible?"
226      "I'm afraid not, but there is a story that comes to mind that might
227 clear up the point a bit.
228 
229      Once, in the days when craftsmanship flowered, there was a tinsmith, a
230 man of strength and character. Daily he worked at his trade, turning out
231 items that were both beautiful and functional. His work was in great demand
232 and there were few households in town that didn't have at least one utensil
233 made by this fine craftsman. His scope of vision extended beyond work, and
234 he could not help but notice the repressive conditions created by the people
235 in positions of political power. A great number of folks were little more
236 than slaves, taxed heavily to provide comforts for the rulers, and few
237 freedoms they could call their own. The efforts of the tinsmith to rectify
238 these conditions did not go unnoticed, he was thrown in jail.
239      As time went by the jailers became fond of the tinsmith and permitted
240 him to have a prayer rug, woven by his wife. One day when he was talking
241 with the jailers he said, "Perhaps you are aware that I am a metal craftsman,
242 and a good one at that. If you would bring me materials and tools I will
243 fashion artifacts. You can take these items to the market and sell them, thus
244 we can all profit from this miserable situation."
245      His keepers, being somewhat greedy, agreed to bring the tools and other
246 items requested. He fashioned many beautiful things. These were sold by the
247 jailers and the profits divided, although not very evenly. One day when the
248 jailers returned from the market they found the jail unlocked and the
249 tinsmith gone.
250      Our story moves forward to another time and place. The one time tinsmith
251 is now the leader of a large following, a group called the 'designers'. One
252 of the new arrivals to the group is inquiring how the name came to be.
253      "It's from a time when I was imprisoned for my beliefs. My wife went to
254 the person who had fashioned the locks on the jail and obtained the details
255 of the design. She then wove these into a prayer rug, at the very place where
256 my head would rest, during my daily prayers. Once I recognized the design for
257 what it was I fashioned a plan for escape. Under a ruse I persuaded my
258 jailers to bring tools and materials. From these I fashioned a key and made
259 my escape. That is how I came to be free, to form this group."
260 {  ^+/* --------------- The Mesolithic Mathematician --------------- */+^   }
261 
262 
263 /$&!)_%&#)_&^_)#&!)_&_!&%+_!)#*&%_)&!#^_)&)_@$^&$)_&@)_#&%^@)_&^_@&_+@#&^_@)^
264 Lila:Is it safe to assume that you found the elusive 'key' that unlocks so
265      many 'important' things? Things to be treasured, and not ignored. Things
266      that require constant attention, without distractions from cross-country
267      truckers hell-bent of self-destruction. In as much as we try to survive
268      this world in which we live, conditions sometimes warrant extreme action
269      that may go against the first edict of survival. Self-preservation
270      is a strong force, but in preserving pain and suffering, is anything
271      really accomplished?
272 Leonard:And what else would you like sir, the proverbial eggs in your beer?
273      I have all the new archives on PCDOS disks now. I will delete the headers
274      for you, but the ordering of the files will remain as random as wheat
275      thrown 'gainst the wind. That could change however, if the man who is
276      responsible for the xfer of text files from machine to machine, namely
277      one voyeur, can be convinced to copy the files in order. Four files per
278      disk can be handled iff (not a typo, check you math texts) four files
279      fit. We try to please the customers here at Archive Center East, as long
280      as it doesn't mean too much trouble for us.
281 Kathy:Do you still need hints on getting the pirate's treasure chest? As for
282      Zork, voyeur can be a great aid. He recently stumbled through it, and
283      according to rumor, achieved all 350 points. His hints and clues will
284      I am sure be cleverly worded, to avoid giving too much away, unlike the
285      clods who reside on the CBBS systems.
286 PC&S'ers et all : So what exciting things are we going to do the Saturday?
287      I can't stand another early breakup like we had two weeks ago. I need
288      a break from my books. One can only take so much studying before the
289      words and numbers merge into one indistinguishable mass of jejune
290      abstraction.
291 *)_#*@)_%*@#)_%*@#_)*#@_)%*@#)_%*@ L'homme sans Parity *&#)_@*%)_*)_%*)_%@#*%
292 
293 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
294      Not to go overboard on the current BUCKAROO BANZAI fascination, 
295  I think the unindoctrinated should know just a little about it before they
296  go. Namely, yes there is somewhat of a comic book format to it, but also
297  that the director of the movie has been writing BANZAI stories for years,
298  which may tend to leave a few bases uncovered, such as...
299  *you kind of get a STAR WARS feeling about some of the characters because
300   sometimes there may be a reference to an individuals past or his character
301   trait.  No problem, except they don't get back to it to tell you what was
302   so funny about the reference.
303  *And since he's been writing the stories for so long,(a matter of YEARS of
304   unpublished material,) some of the background is lost as to how some of the
305   characters actually developed.(Sorry, kid. That first screenplay don't cut it)
306  *And the last point is this; you might get the feeling that if it were a book
307   that you somehow read chapter five before you got to chapter two. (What?)
308  But don't let this sway you away, BUCKAROO BANZAI is a terrific show, and I
309  wouldn't miss it.
310  (I'm not too biased because I'm a projectionist at a Portland movie house,
311   but a good movie is a good movie...)
312 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     --->Sondargaard     ^^^^^^^^^^
313 
314 oh yea! More often the case is that the viewer isn't sophisticated enough
315 to tie loose ends together, and make coherence out of chaos. The general
316 public can`t take a complex movie, digest it, and come out feeling secure
317 in the knowledge that they 'understood' the film. Why are movies like ET
318 so popular, while films with real meaning and deep understatement like
319 'The Last Metro' go un-noticed, except for the intellectual set? It is a sad
320 day when movie directors must simplify plots and characters to keep producers
321 rolling in money from moronic masses in movie houses. How many good films
322 could have been great, if they hadn't been Americanized? For a society that
323 considers itself sophisticated, we sure could learn much from our European
324 neighbors. Foreign film directors are the last bastion of intelligence in
325 the movie theater. Without their input in the form of foreign films, what
326 a wasteland the movie industry would be. The few renegade American directors
327 who flush the Hollywood mentality all have been influenced by past and
328 present foreign directors. Without these kindred souls who still believe
329 movie making is an art, and not an industry solely bent on the almighty
330 dollar, the only thing of substance coming out of Hollywood would be the
331 NO SMOKING commercials. Save the dying breed of intelligent film makers.
332 Voice your opinion, support your position. If you revel in the carnage of
333 Friday the 13th part 2^5, then take no heed; but if your are a truly
334 concerned film goer, show your support in the best way possible, at the
335 box office.
336                                       A FILM FAN.
337 
338 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
339 This will be a joint entry, the Doctor is sitting here cracking poor jokes as I type this.  I am trying to convince him
340 to come to thee next PorSFiS, would any of you help me?
341 ++++++++++++++
342 L'homme; what progress?  I haven't your working plot routine or the time to finish it anyway.  I still have to do 2 
343 late AP english assignments.  I did talk to Tom about Saturday, I think he will hire someone else soon if my situation
344 doesn't change.  Oh, well.  Anyway, I can go.
345 +++++++++++++++
346 Haven't anything to enter for the adventure right now...
347 ????????????????
348 The Doctor and K-9 were STILL trying to fix the Dimensional Stabilizer floating around in E-Space (Pick a time, ANY
349 time!!).  While rummaging through a pile of misc. items looking for a certain replacement part, he comes upon a strange
350 device..."Banzai Oscillation Overthruster...good idea, bad design.  I'll have to have a talk with him.  After all my 
351 teachings and he still can't get it right."  The Doctor chucks the 'thruster away.  Just then a sudden jolt strikes the
352 Tardis.  "What the...K-9, what's going on?"  'Master.  We are being pulled somewhere by a force registering 610.4 on 
353 the Umu scale.'  "Damn that Milchar!  I'm going to rip up those #%$'#'% 3x5 cards..."
354 ?????????????????
355 That's it for now...
356 ??????????????? The Doctor ?????????????+++++++++++++++++ Milchar ++++++++++++++------------ 04:43 on 11/27/84--------
357 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
358      The wind howled as the door to the Inn opened.  A tall lean man entered
359 and ducked to avoid a flying blue smurf.  The man mumbled under his breath
360 and threaded his way through the noisy crowd to a table in the rear.  He
361 sat with his back to the wall, an old habit.  He had been gone for a long
362 time, but recognized many.  A faint smile came to his lips.
363      "What can I get you, sir?"  It was a woman's voice.  The man looked
364 up expectantly, but it was not Pam.  
365      "A glass of wine, if you please?"  The barmaid turned to go.  Salazar
366 laid a hand on her arm.  "Have you seen Pam or Leroy Mckane?"
367      "You'll have to excuse me," she said blankly.  "I'm new here."
368      Salazar nodded and let her go.  The cryptic message said Pam would be
369 here.  He could see faint signs of her passing, but that was all.  Maybe it
370 was too late.   Too late in more ways than one.  He had thrown off his
371 pursuers for the moment.  But they would never give up the chase.  Salazar
372 touched the reassuring weight of the automatic nestling under his right
373 armpit and settled back in his chair to enjoy the tales of adventure.  He 
374 had experienced enough adventure of his own in the last few weeks.  He would
375 let the others entertain him for the present.
376 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*Valinor*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
377 
378 
379 
380 HEY, DO ANY OF YOU HITCHHIKER FANS KNOW THAT IT WILL SOON BE COMING OUT
381 IN CINEMA FORM
382 WHERE IT CONTRADICTS EVERYTHING IN THE THIRD BOOK AND THE BRITSH RADIO 
383 VERSION
384 
385 
386 A Film Fan: Do not take what I have said harshly, my words were only in 
387      warning to those that might wish to view the film not knowing what to
388      expect, as was the case with ERASERHEAD, another off the wall movie to
389      say the least, but I enjoyed it also. (Am I still so critcal of the
390      current throng of movie goers, well...)
391      Touche' as to the European influence! So, someone else knows where to
392      look when not satisfied with the present lot. Your insight was quite
393      refreshing, a good parry/reposte to the ` I-just-saw-Terminator--
394      Wasn't-he-awesome?   (give me a hammer and put them out of my misery)
395 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     --->Sondargaard     ^^^^^^^^^
396 
397 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
398 Greetings:  Hello, and thank you for your interesting stories
399 of FLYING SMURFS, exciting adventures, upset movie goers,
400 and other odds and ends.  This is quite an interesting little system.
401 I am real new to your system, and would like to find out what kind
402 of equipment you use.  I am using an ALPHA MICRO AM-60 terminal with
403 a SIGNALMAN MK XII 300/1200 baud ANCHOR AUTOMATION, INC. modem.  I
404 use this primarily to tie into the computer at work, where I am the
405 system operator.  Our system has 2- 60Mb Winchester disk drives, a
406 25Mb Removable cartridge winchester drive and a 25Mb fixed drive.
407 The internal memory configuration is 5-512k memory boards (2.5Mb).
408 To interface with this nice little system, there is 14 terminals,
409 6 Okidata printers, and a 600 lines per minute DATAPRODUCTS printer.
410 Currently we are discussing the purchase of a 400Mb Fujitzu(?) drive
411 which has a lot faster disk access time (however this would be for
412 the next fiscal year probable).
413 I would like to findout from others what they have.  11-27  2040 hours
414 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(they really do call me..) PAPA SMURF~~
415 
416 PaPa Smurf:  You begin to remind me of Mez...  
417 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     --->Sondargaard     ^
418 
419 M
420 
421 Qu%q
422 
423 Arrr2rgggcgc!!!!  A4ic on my phon! line!!!
424 ::::::::::::O O:::::::::::11/27:::::::::::::::22:38:::::::::::O O::::::::::
425 Leonard: you made the Cities connection quite rapidly.  Is that perchance
426 the origin, or do you merely have every book memorized?  Or WAIT -
427 I know - you have them all indexed and cross-referenced on your M100
428 (your high-tech bag of holding).
429 Regarding the archives, last time I did the transfer, I applied as much
430 negative entropy to the order as I could.  Judging from the result, imagine
431 the mess *I* recieved.  As they say they say (I've never heard it, but I've
432 heard it referred to) - GIGO.
433 L'homme: that msg to Lila, so ambiguous to the outsider, was just Dripping
434 with hidden references/meanings known only to the two of you.  Fun being
435 on the inside, isn't it. (the same urge responsible for those AE boards you
436 like so much like Rome...)
437 Oh, by the way - thanks for the kind words vis-a-vis my Zork abilities.
438 ("stumbled through it.....  rumor has it.... ").  Speaking of which, hows
439 the quest for II & III coming?
440 As far as something exciting to do after PorSFiS/PC&S, hows about we go over
441 to Leonards, warm up his MC-10, and run 10 X = X + 1: PRINT X: GOTO 10.
442 That should keep us interested for most of the afternoon, waiting for the denouement.
443 Kathy: if you want non-blatant Zork answers, how about this:
444 N, W, NE, D, S, N, E.  That gets you from SOMEWHERE in the maze, to 
445 the troll room. (be warned - the converse does not necessarily work).
446 :::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::voyeur::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::
447 TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
448 film fan--the mass of Europeans, so I understand, regard Clint Eastwood
449 and Jerry Lewis as high art and berate their own filmmakers for being
450 unable to produce similar material.  So it goes. 
451 voyeur--one can satisfy one's degenerate penchant for sick and hilarious
452 t-shirts at Andy & Bax.  They have some real zingers. (universal minds
453 rule the slime pit.)  You can also get pure wool Portughese combat
454 jodhpurs. And day-glo watch caps.
455 kathy--leap in with any ideas on getting out of smurfville; you can be
456 a new arrival from the Ruby Valley or Blue Demon's business agent or
457 whatever you want. We're dying to be rescued.
458 TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT G. Minsky TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
459 L'homme: You put 4 (and sometimes 5) files on a disk LAST time! I asked for
460 four so ask to avoid all the shuffling caused by trying to find room for
461 that one last file! 
462      In any case, once we start getting the 5 1/4" archive disks, I can see
463 no problem with keeping things in order.
464 Voyeur: I *FIRST* read some of those stories in 5th grade (and got my copy
465 of "A Life for the Stars" confiscated...). You've seen my bookshelves. I
466 have read EVERY book on them AT LEAST once. If it's a good story, I've 
467 probably read it 5-20 times. (I have worn out 2 paperback copies of "Stranger
468 in a Strange Land").
469     As for Blish, have you ever read "Black Easter"? If not, please find a
470 copy and read it! If you have read it, read the SEQUEL(!!) "The Day After
471 Doomsday".
472 __________________________________Leonard_____________________________________
473 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
474   As Salazar sipped his wine, he noticed that there appeared to be
475 something on the bottom of the glass. He drank some more thinking that if
476 it was poison or a drug, it was far too late already.
477   Peering more closely, he saw that it was a message:
478 
479 WELCOME BACK
480      THE NETWORK
481 PS. YOU REALLY SHOULD BE MORE CAREFUL
482 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY
483         Reaching into his pack, Bard flipped a switch to TIME-STOP. He then
484 extracted an ancient tome. After locating the appropriate entry, he set the
485 tome down and proceeded to remove a vial of ink(?) and some drawing tools.
486 He hummed to himself as he worked.
487         Finished, he stepped back to admire his handiwork. He then packed
488 everything away, flipped the switch back to NORMAL, and ran!
489         While he had been blinded, the demon was still able to "feel" the
490 pentagram appear. He'd never felt one take shape quite that fast before, 
491 but no matter! The foolish mortal didn't know the truth about pentagrams or
492 he would never have tried one!
493         True, the demon was compelled to appear in the pentagram (a limb at
494 each of four points while the head occupied the fifth). However, once he
495 had appeared in the proper spread-eagled position, he was free to LEAVE it
496 and attack. 
497         He had shown SOME ingenuity, as the pentagram was only about one-
498 third of the demon's normal size. Unfortunately for the mortal, hthe demon 
499 would AUTOMATICALLY change size to fit the symbol. The demon grinned evilly
500 as he disappeared.
501         The grin was gone a split second later when he reappeared in mid-
502 air AND IMMEDIATELY DISAPPEARED AGAIN! 
503         "Where in hell...
504                      is the bloody....
505                                  damn pentagram!"
506                                                screeched the demon as he
507 continued to disappear and reappear, each time one-third of his former size
508          Meanwhile, bard was smiling as he thought of the demon. True, the
509 solution wasn't ORIGINAL, but it was still elegant.
510         He could picture the demon's wrath when it finally realized that
511 the pentagram was tatooed on its STOMACH!
512 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
513 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/
514 Papa Smurf:The industry consensis (and also my own) is that the "eagle" 
515 drives from fujitsu happen to be the best avalible. Sounds to me like your
516 running a 34-36 or system 1. Not even close? perhaps one of the select few 
517 who had brains enough to get something from DG? 11/750 perhaps? 25 megs is
518 a bit small for a 780. then again, I am a biased speed phreak when it comes
519 to larger processors, I think 4 megs isn't enough when 16 people fire up
520 a compieler.
521 I am currently using a SV328 configured as a terminal to tie into a '780.
522 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/The Man in Gray/? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/
523 ************************************************************************
524 THANKS MUCH FOR THE  HINTS MY FRIENDS, SEE YA ALL AT THE MEETING ON
525 SATURDAY.  I GOT ZORK CLUES TODAY, ANYONE TO GIVE ME A HINT ON THE
526 PIRATES CHEST IN ADVENTURE?
527 ********************************kathy***********************************
528 $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$h$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$,$$$$$$$$($($$$$$$$$$$$
529 $$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
530 
531 0433 HOURS 11/28/84
532 
533 Sondargaard: As it happens you don't remind me of anyone. NO, I have no
534   connection with Papa S. (don't even know who it is). Besides I don't
535   even know what kind of computer I'm using! Does it really matter?----Mez
536 ==========================================================================
537 You know you are really in trouble when.... you steal from old Mad 
538 magazines and pass it off as original.
539 =================================================== Sudden Death =========
540 ******************"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*""*""**"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"      
541 AND BACK ON THE SUBJECT OF INTERESTING TITLES ON T-SHIRTS
542     
543   you should look in a copy of Soldier of Fortune Magazine
544      
545   Mercenaries Don't Die.....................they just go to hell and regroup
546   Better Dead than Red
547   Kill a Commie for Mommie
548   GOD,GUNS,&GUTS made AMERICA...lets keep all three.
549   U.S Army..the only thing I feel when I kill is the recoil of my rifle
550   Join the U.S.M.C...travel to distant lands;meet exciting,unusual people and 
551  kill them
552   Nuke their ASS and take their Gas
553   WARNING!!!TRESPASSERS WILL BE SHOT.......SURVIVORS WILL BE SHOT AGAIN
554   NOTICE...ANYONE FOUND HERE AT NIGHT WILL BE FOUND HERE IN THE MORNING
555   IS THERE LIFE AFTER DEATH????...............TRESPASS HERE AND FIND OUT
556   IF YOU COME THROUGH THIS DOOR YOU WILL BE KILLED....SI VIENES POR ESTA PUERTA
557 TE MATO....
558   CRIMINALS BEWARE..WE SHOOT BACK
559   CRIMINALS BEWARE..NO PRISONERS TAKEN
560   AL TRESPASAR TE PEGO UN TIRO
561   
562 *"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*""*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"* ANY COMMENTS*"*"*"*"*"*"*
563 "*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*SPOOK"*"*"*
564 ################################################################################
565 ################################################################################
566     PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING
567                                                        NOTICE
568   
569  >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
570    INSTRUCTIONS IN CASE OF NUCLEAR
571            ATTACK
572 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
573  1. SEEK IMMEDIATE COVER
574 
575  2. STAY CLEAR OF ALL WINDOWS
576 
577  3. KEEP AWAY FROM OBJECTS THAT MIGHT 
578     CAUSE INJURY
579  
580  4. AS SOON AS YOU SEE THE FLASH OF THE
581     NUCLEAR EXPLOSION, BEND OVER, PLACE
582     YOUR HEAD BETWEEN YOUR LEGS.........    .....AND KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE.
583   
584 
585   >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
586         THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION
587 
588  ###############################################################################
589 ########################################
590 
591 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
592 Mez: I only meant  [PaPa S] :: [Mez]  not  [PaPa S] = [Mez]
593     Because you both have the gift of stating something simple that can
594     cause others to stumble if they eavesdrop. And no, it doesn't matter...
595 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     --->Sondargaard     ^^^^^^^^
596 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
597   From Prometheus: The Designed
598   I am asorry for not being more prompt in returning any messages of late, as I was in Peru for a canference on African Bees.
599   Africanized bees are what some people have taken to calling "Killer Bees".  In any case, I am back and, as usual,
600 assorted messages follow...
601 
602   Man in Gray; Financing is cleared through NSA and I can't touch it from here.  Salog can tell you what he damn well pleases,
603 but I don't get a penny until someone in Washington clears it.
604   Salog is screwed anyway, I payed up on the Red, Blue and Black vans three days ago.  And filed it with NSA immediately.
605   Kendall is still sitting on the plane as I enter this.  I found out that he and his secretary are heading for the Observtory
606 with about three Federal Marshalls. I can handle the Marshalls, but I think were gonna tip off Kendall in the process.
607   I am due on a flight in an hour to Colorado, and I'll beat them to the Observatory by about thirty minutes.
608   The bastard wouldn't even pay for a direct flight.  Would you beleivethe flight plan he bought calls fortwo layovers.
609   I have a little red light here that says someones tapping, gotta go, messages to Sondargaard, and Kathy and such later...
610 
611   Anyway, it must've been line interference on this end, but nothing more to say on that, but Grice is all upity about APPLE,
612 and the modem.  I am after a modem cord, and then things can get back into action.  MLCbbs is quickly becoming reality.
613 
614   SONDARGAARD; I was at the 'Screening' and think I know your borne identity, to make sure, please tell me if I have  seen you
615 on a Tri-Met line more than once.  I am pleased at finding I have met you.
616   KATHY; If you would be so kind as to attend the next PorSFiS, I can bring a very nice Pente set (Just received as an early
617 Christmass present) An interesting pente game passes as exciting.  Doesn't it?
618 
619 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
620 
621 
622 ;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;.,;
623   I disagree that only Foreign films have intelligence. I also
624 disagree that having understandable chacters means having dumb
625 characters. And I also disagree that understanding characters
626 means that the audience is dumb, and unsophisticated. One could
627 say that never grasping what any character ever means is dumb...

TOTAL NUMBER OF LINES = 627 
