From: TURTLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: cat            
Date & Time: 08/31/90 00:23:50
Message Number  8306

>...it [Mad Dog Velcro] will hold a volvo t the underside of a steel
>I-beam, right next to the guy from the Crazy Glue ad.
 
Yes, but how well does it stick to rabid canines? THAT's what /I/ buy
Velcro for!
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 00:25:58
Message Number  8307

>Any general who'd send American ground troops and expect them to
>survive is hopeless...
 
That is my point EXACTLY.
 
>Where the heck is our "front lines" in this case?
 
On the Saudi-Kuwait border, where a not inconsiderable number of Army
infantry has been sent, of course! My point is this: The Iraquis invade
Saudi Arabia. They have lots O' tanks and infantry. They overrun the
relatively few American and other infantry stationed in Saudi Arabia.
Lots of Americans die. We retaliate with air and sea-based forces. We
win, in the long run. The American soldiers are still dead. The phrase
"human trip wire" as it applies to the American infantry in Saudi Arabia
isn't a creation of mine, I fear; I picked it up from the gentlemenm in
Father's Air Force unit, who seem to be even more pessimistic than I
about the fate of the poor schmucks on the front lines in Saudi Arabia.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 00:31:09
Message Number  8308

>What do y'all think [about the money scheme]?
 
I think the good Senator's been snortin' too much Peruvian marching
powder.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 08/31/90 00:34:46
Message Number  8309

>...did you ever notice that those two are like, really REALLY similar?
 
Only in certain areas, politics and furry fandom being two of them.
Max is also much more sloppy about grammar than I am.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 00:36:36
Message Number  8310

>...I don't think Hussien will use his Chems...remember, he's gotta
>cross that space, too!
 
Not necessarily. He could just sit back and shell large areas with
chemical weapons, with the intent of inflicting as many casulties as
possible--strategic, rather than tactical, use. He's already got a
proven track record for doing that sort of thing.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 02:05:11
Message Number  8312

  They never intended to invade Saudi.....
===========

From: SNAKEBYTE           
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Animalism!     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 02:20:52
Message Number  8313

I aggree to an extent.....but the main point is that the people 
"being taught" must be willing to "learn". Hands on is the best way.
I'm an Automation Engineer and I learned by being a machinest, a tool
and die man, an assembler, an electrician, a detailer, a designer and
then here. Actually went to school for Marine Biology, got where I am
through "doing", hands on!!! But I WANTED to learn......
    sssssssSNAKEBYTE .  .
===========

From: SNAKEBYTE           
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Zappa          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 02:24:44
Message Number  8314

>Zappa....sensitive people...
  
I think anyone who DOESN'T like Zappa can be classified as a "sensitive
person" when it comes to hearing his music <grin>. I took a tape in that
I had compiled of 90 minutes of my Zappa favorites in to a friend at 
work. He played a little on his tape player on his desk and the looks he
got....(hmmmmm, maybe that's why he got transferred to our south plant).
===========

From: SNAKEBYTE           
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Wilmington     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 02:28:10
Message Number  8315

I was there around '75+. I used to hang around Kure Beach and 
Wrightsville alot!!! Been to Fort Fisher often, too. Used to walk out
the breaker wall to Victoria Island and have some big oyster parties
out there during high tide. Used to live at The Crest and Red Dogs. I
went by UNC-W a while back and WOW has it grown. When I was there they
had just opened up their first dorm (Galloway Hall) and now the place
is BIG. Kind of miss that area....but love it here, too. Guess I'm just
hooked on the beach.....
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Hutchinson's   
Date & Time: 08/31/90 06:38:04
Message Number  8317

 
  Where is it? I've never heard of it... It's in Sarasota, isn't it?
===========

From: BIG LEW             
To: JONBOY              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 13:35:41
Message Number  8319

Can you tell me where this place is?  And what kind of music you play?
I missed some messages, I think.
Thanks.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: weire          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 17:37:25
Message Number  8321

>Do what the big boys do... call it a feature.
 
"The following is a heretofore undocumented feature," hmm? While I'm
at it, I suppose I could write a set of docs for aLTER rEALITY in which
twenty percent of the definitions are of the form "A ________ is a
sequence of non-blank characters separated by blanks."
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 08/31/90 17:40:51
Message Number  8322

>Van Hagar sucks. at least with Roth there there was a solidness there
>and action in the songs...
 
...not to mention inanity, triteness, and lyrics that were (literally)
written on the john. Sammy Hagar brought with him something Van Halen
had never before had--an intelligent lead singer.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: KEN OBER            
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 08/31/90 17:44:35
Message Number  8323

>I saw William Shatner as "The Big Kahoona" in some surfer movie ...
 
"Back to the Beach," by any chance? (It's kind of embarassing to admit,
but I've actually watched that entire movie...at least I didn't pay
money to see it! That 'un ranks right up there with "The Stuff" and
"Killer Klowns from Space."
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Nuke Kids      
Date & Time: 08/31/90 17:48:57
Message Number  8324

>I think Ken here is grabbing for something to support himself...
 
For what it's worth, Ken's not the first person to claim "Lucy in the
Sky with Diamonds" is in some way supportative of drug use. Of course,
the same people who make that claim also generally say things like
"'Stairway to Heaven' has Satanic messages in it" and "Judas Priest
makes people commit suicide."
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 08/31/90 20:35:35
Message Number  8325

>What is more fun than leaping to conclusions?
 
Leaping from them?
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 21:37:11
Message Number  8328

>...when you sit down and tell a machine to play something over, that
>is not so great...
 
THANK YOU!!! It is always wonderful to see someone who has SOME sort
of musical sensibilities in this world of sequencers and lip-synching.
Drum machines, when used correctly, are interesting devices; Yamaha
makes a really nice hexhead kit that's played /exactly/ the same way
you'd play an acoustic kit, only it allows you to define the sound each
"drum" makes when struck. That sort of thing doesn't bug me--hell, if
I could afford it, I wouldn't mind owning a set (or even a set of 
generic old-fashioned drums, for that matter)--but the Paula Abdul
school of "Flip a Switch and Off You Go" really ticks me off.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: HI!!!!         
Date & Time: 08/31/90 21:44:13
Message Number  8329

>How many of y'all wanna get together and party?
 
Count me in, if this message isn't obsolete already...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: weire          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 21:45:52
Message Number  8330

>...I saw a book, "The Search for Turtle's Navel"...
 
Don't buy it. It's totally unauthorized, and full of the most malicious
disinformation. Imagine, beliving I can't find my own navel...(grumble,
grumble. When my lawyers get done with them, those low-down good-for-
nothing Turlte ignoramuses will rue the day...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 22:04:44
Message Number  8332

>...can you actually outperform a CD??
 
Yes. CD is not a perfect medium. The NeXT can sample and play back
sound at the same resolution as a CD but with better frequency response;
so can DAT. Truth be known, by today's standards CD resolution just
ain't that good--but it's so firmly entrenched at this point that it's
damn near impossible to switch to a new standard.
===========

From: MIKE GREENAWALD     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: words          
Date & Time: 08/31/90 23:50:54
Message Number  8333

Turtle, I have great regards for you wisdom. You take great pride in
what you say. I wish that more did.
Have been attending a conference on communication in Tampa. I got asked 
to participate. This really made my day after reading all the NS comment
on another board. I can truly say now that my logic while it might be
a little old and faulty at times is still good. I got a seven rating out
of ten. I felt tghat I was maybe a four.
You should try those conferences. All that you need is a letter and a fe
w dollars for the hotel and food. The leaders of the conferences teach
fair fighting which is a good concept. You have to have a message to
give and use a technique to communicate. It is neat to borrow a term
i heard the other day.
===========

From: MIKE GREENAWALD     
To: ALL                 
Subject: rufus          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 00:10:58
Message Number  8334

By the way what has happened to Rufus? I dialed up his board when I got 
back from the city of Tampa only to find that the number did not work.
Has he surcome to something or is his board n need of repair again?
===========

From: MIKE GREENAWALD     
To: ALL                 
Subject: Apple hard driv
Date & Time: 09/01/90 00:18:41
Message Number  8335

Has anyone come across a software program that will restore ProDos
to a hard drive without destroying all the other programs on the
drive? I have a 20 Meg and a five Meg Apple profile on an Apple IIe.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/01/90 01:18:20
Message Number  8336

 
 I don't think music was meant to have intelligent lead singers.
   I'd take songs from the john any day over 'love comes walkin' in'
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 01:23:50
Message Number  8337

   and me..... I just listen to Cassettes and records!
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Hutchinson's   
Date & Time: 09/01/90 10:24:53
Message Number  8346

>...It's in Sarasota, isn't it?
 
Yep, along with George Bush, Jimmy Hoffa, and one SR-71.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/01/90 10:27:04
Message Number  8347

>"The Stuff" and "Killer Klowns from Space."
 
Both of which you can find at Blockbuster.  They may be over priced, but
they do carry some weird stuff.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: MIKE GREENAWALD     
Subject: rufus          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 10:31:22
Message Number  8348

>Has he surcome to something or is his board n need of repair again?
 
Actually, I've joined the dark side of the Dew.  And my board is in need
of some repair, which I shall be doing today (I suppose).  And this
is the first time since it's been up that it has gone down.  The first 
week of struggling with it doesn't count as repair.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: MIKE GREENAWALD     
Subject: Apple hard driv
Date & Time: 09/01/90 10:33:08
Message Number  8349

Errr, do you have a partition set up for ProDOS on the HD?  If you do, 
you just need to copy ProDOS onto it and your off and spinning.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:44:07
Message Number  8351

   Hey, I LIKED Killer Klowns.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:44:38
Message Number  8352

  By the way, that's "Outer" Space, though Tman dudn't say it either
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:50:58
Message Number  8353

> "Backto the Beach," by any chance?
 Nope, ol' Bill wasn't in that flick.
> ...I've actually watched that entire movie...
 
  Kinda depends on what mood you're in. If you feel like seeing Pee-Wee 
Herman do a new version of "Papa Oom Mow-Mow" called "Surfing Bird", 
then this is the film for you...
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Nuke Kids      
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:53:21
Message Number  8354

> Ken's not the firstperson to claim...
 
   Yeah, but he /knows/ it's been  admantly denied by John Lennon. If 
you don't think that's important, you should hear some of the things 
Lennon HAS admitted to...
 
  It's really a moot point anyway. He told me he did it just to set me 
off... (it worked, eh?)
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:56:34
Message Number  8355

> THANK YOU!!!
 
 YOU'RE WELCOME!!!
 
  I see your opinion is the exact same as mine.  But, would you consider
something like you described (the Yamaha set) a "drum machine"? That
sounds more like "electric drums" to me, not a machine.
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 12:59:15
Message Number  8356

> ...weird background hiss...
 
  Is this along the same lines as when you record a CD on audio tape and
get an annoying high pitch on your playback?
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 13:00:34
Message Number  8357

> CD resolution just ain't that good..
 
  Hmmm.. news to me. I can  see that your quote out of context looks 
REAL bad... sorry. Anyways, my question is: Even though we've got the 
system firmly implanted, can't we just improve it to get better audio
response? I mean, to me, the CD is a miracle. I would like to hear 
/better/...
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/01/90 19:58:06
Message Number  8358

Great! Tell me the time and place. If I can, I'll be there.
           Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:02:03
Message Number  8359

You could fix it that way, I suppose... but what if there's an off-
chance that I'd want to actually get into the glove compartment at
some time?
            Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Mr.Ed Dimension
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:03:05
Message Number  8360

The dimension of Mr. Ed? <Very puzzled look on unicorn's face.> As
far as I know, I'm the only equine furry on these BBS's. Terribly
lonely storyboard...
            Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Rabid canines  
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:05:22
Message Number  8361

>Yes, but how well does it stick to rabid canines?
      
    I sincerel hope you didn't get the Mad Dog Velcro attachment to
your shell...
                  Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:07:11
Message Number  8362

<About the changing the color of money...>
    
   The scariest part was that Senator D'Amato bought an hour's worth
of satellite time to broadcast this idea. The same one-minute newsfeed,
over and over. I wonder if ANY station cared enough to broadcast it?
               Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: SNAKEBYTE           
Subject: Animalism!     
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:10:00
Message Number  8363

Came across a really great quote the other day. Can't remember where.
   "When students are given the chance to walk out of classrooms in
the same way they walk out of plays, then the classrooms will be filled
with eager minds, and the playhouses will all fail for lack of support."
     
   If school weren't mandatory, would I have gone? Absolutely -- but
maybe not to the place I went. 
                 Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: BIG LEW             
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/01/90 20:13:45
Message Number  8364

I have no earthly, heavenly, or hades-like way of knowing where the
"Dog House" is. But, I've been pushing to get together a "pick up
band" among the members of this system, and one suggested the Dog
House. Style of band? Damn if I know. My only experience in bands have
been from high school and a >very< alternate jazz band -- in both
cases, playing clarinet (and a few other, stranger, instruments.)
   I'll be bringing two guitars -- one classical, one Ovation. And maybe
a clarinet. And probably a kazoo.
   Our eventual style? Dang if I know.
                Chip P. Unicorn
    
Do you play? Wanna join in?
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 10:43:31
Message Number  8371

>  Hey, I LIKED Killer Klowns.
 
And they like you.  I never implied that Killer Klowns wasn't a good 
movie.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/02/90 10:46:04
Message Number  8372

>but what if there's an off-chance that I'd want to actually get into
>the glove compartment at some time?
 
You can't have it all, my horned friend.  I'd suggest just ripping the
door off.  That way it won't hit the knees, and you have real easy 
access to it.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Rabid canines  
Date & Time: 09/02/90 10:48:02
Message Number  8373

>     I sincerel hope you didn't get the Mad Dog Velcro attachment to
>your shell....
 
Silly unicorn, Mad Dog's for dogs.  Turtle uses "Mad Reptile" Velcro.
 
    ...maybe that's why he's such a babe magnet??
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 10:50:45
Message Number  8374

>And probably a kazoo.
 
Is it electric?  Either way, count me in for the kazoo.  And Zot plays a
mean mouth harp.
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 12:03:40
Message Number  8375

 
  If they're thinking of  the same dog house I am, it's here in the town
of Bradenton, of US 41 in an odd place, not far from a McDonalds...
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 12:05:43
Message Number  8376

> count me in for the kazoo.  And Zot plays a mean mouth harp.
 
  Hey, that sounds cool... Lets see you and zot do something like 
"Dueling Mouth Instruments"...
  
  I take it that you and Zot plan  on going to this dog house jam?? You
think you would consider taking me along with you guys? Yeah, a kazoo 
player, a bassist and a wannabe drummer....
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: MAX                 
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:02:30
Message Number  8378

Actually, the suits have not been so thoughroughly tested that you can
get such an accurate time on when they are no longer effective, and so
the 30-60 min estimate is a conservative one put out by the Army so
when you are using one you will get the hell outta Dodge and not dally
for the (about) 100 minutes which is it's max.  
  And, in my defense, I never said anything about how effective they
were against biological agents. -- But then again, I don't think that
the troops are in danger of a Bio attack.  
 
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: MAX                 
Subject: Furrys         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:07:46
Message Number  8379

Yes, you are right...but you know my twisted mind...
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:10:56
Message Number  8380

SW>Specialist, I'll never call you a Homophobe...just a bigot.
  
Thank you.  I prefer the term.
  
  
  
What insult term may I use to refer to you with?
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: ...            
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:14:43
Message Number  8381

Oh, by the way...
  
Wahhh!
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Yo! Furry Fen! 
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:16:09
Message Number  8382

Oh, by the way, I'm not much for kids, either..."pedophobe" I'm not.
I just can't seem to relate to little kids...(I'm the youngest in my
family and never had the opportunity).
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:20:27
Message Number  8383

Hold it, we aren't invading another country...yet!  We are tring to get
Kuwait back.  And for that matter, to assist Saudi Arabia from getting
invaded.  Now.  If they start some shit, then sure, we have to kick 
thier butts.  Of course, we will lose some men...but the alternative
is to just let that madman take over all the oil fields one by on until
he's got a monopoly on them...then what?  
  
  
WHat's YOUR solution?
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Yeah!!!        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:23:46
Message Number  8384

JB>I'd like to get a group of us there and just have fun...
  
WHEN!!??  WHEN!!??  WHEN!!??   I'll be there...invite everybody...
  
  
  
Hmm....doncha think we all (the band members) ought get together and
coordinate on what songs we know and can play?  So we can at least sound
semi-audible?  (Decible?)  *(Tolerable)*?
  
Oh, incidentally, I have a friend who plays drums (or used to, I don't 
kmow how good he is now, though he practices all the time on his 
steering wheel.)  Should I enlist his help?
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:32:41
Message Number  8386

You are wrong.  American troops are not stupid enough to sit around and
wait for the first wave of troops to come and get them, and yes, they
WILL know far in advance when they are coming.  And yes, they ARE well
prepared to resist any initial attack, and act accordingly for any
following attack.  
  
As in any conflict, we will lose soldiers, but they will lose more...
and they know it.  Why do you think they haven't attacked yet?
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:36:25
Message Number  8387

Right, he sits back and inflicts casualties with chems...we sit back 
and shell the hell outta him with the naval forces, with the tac nukes
(105 and 155 MM howitzers) and with the airforce (probably a little more
difficult, but it wouldn't take long to wipe out his air force).   
Besides, how to you think he's gonna get those shells to us?  Artiller
we could wipe out in a few hours, and rockets are no problem with our
new anti-rocket missiles.  We's shoot missiles down while they were stil
in Iraqi air space!   
  No, no problem.  
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: ZOT GNOP            
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:44:49
Message Number  8388

Hey, do you wanna play for the band?
I understand that you are a killer bass..
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Harleys        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 13:46:02
Message Number  8389

"Outta work?  Eat your rice burner."   That's why I'd buy a Harley.
If for no other reason than I don't feel like supporting the Japaneese
economy.  
  
                         A Blindly Loyal Specialist.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: BEATLE              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:09:51
Message Number  8390

   
   Here's a Relief wanabe drummer..
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:12:26
Message Number  8391

  Kuwait was Iraq fiiiirst.....
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: UNIVERSE            
Subject: ..........     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:15:32
Message Number  8392

 
 
 
        Spellwind is Dead, I am Spellwind.........
          pondering..............
          pondering..............
          pondering..............
        From the same body comes a new being?
          pondering..............
          pondering..............
          pondering..............
          sleeping?
===========

From: MAX                 
To: AJ-<TOPGUN>-        
Subject: Letter         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:22:06
Message Number  8393

Thank you.  I don't have anything against the Specialist and I don't
mean to make him feel that I'm out to get him in some way, but I'm not
sure that it ever really, truly clicked that I had a reason for seeming
personally offended.
===========

From: MAX                 
To: TURTLE              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:32:41
Message Number  8394

> Max is also much more sloppy about grammar than I am.
 
Well, I guess we can't all be born editors....
===========

From: MAX                 
To: BEATLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:38:56
Message Number  8395

Despite what Turtle said, I don't think we're going to see anything with
markedly better resolution than CD's for home use in the near future.
Master tape equipment is still a bit out of most people's price range
(not to mention you can't get anything on it unless you work at the
studio); I have heard CD's of live shows that are digitally recorded
that sound slightly /better/ than the original show when played on a
good (and "just" good, not $10,000+ audiophile) stereo system, since
the speakers in most home systems often have better response than
concert systems do.  Beware of the audio fanatic syndrome -- a component
that looks "twice as good" on paper as another given component may
have almost neglible sound difference, kind of like the difference
between a computer monitor that has 2048x2048 resolution with a 2
million color palette and one that has 4096x4096 resolution with a 16.7
million color palette.  The latter one obviously has 4 times the
resolution and 8 times as many color choices, yet you'd have trouble
telling the difference between the two if you showed the same picture
on both of them.  Even if there were one or two cases where you could
see a miniscule improvement, would it be worth paying 10 or more times
the cost of the "low-res" one?
===========

From: MAX                 
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: jap cars       
Date & Time: 09/02/90 14:48:33
Message Number  8396

Actually, Toyota parts are pretty reasonable now, because a lot of them
are being made in America (in fact, I think about 70% of Toyota's cars
sold in the U.S. now are also made here, along with their replacement
parts).  Still not quite as cheap as some American car parts, but in
some cases, a lot less -- a typical Toyota distributor cap is about half
the cost of, say, a Chrysler one, because the design is a lot less
complicated (I don't know how you can make a distributor cap complicated
but this is what the auto parts dealer said when I asked why Chrysler's
was twice as expensive).
   The Japanese cars still have a problem of perception.  To a lot of
American buyers, especially sports car people, every Japanese car is a
Tercel.  I have actually seen a supercharged MR-2 take a Mustang GT 5.0
(when a hotshot high school type decided that he wanted to prove how
much better his big stuff car was than the rice burner next to him at
a stop light, something he probably regretted about 5 seconds later).
Toyota has actually designed a car called the 4500GT which can compete
favorably with exotics like the Porsche 911, but they don't know what to
do with it -- it'd still cost around $45K to produce, just like any
other exotic, and even if a 4500GT could beat a 911 five ways to hell
the average status-conscious yuppie type is going to go, "Oh... it's
a... Toyota, isn't it?"
   American cars could increase in quality and go down in price if they
changed the way the cars were actually assembled, although it's true
that Japanese labor makes significantly less than American labor does.
Their labor also has a lot more input into the car design and a lot more
importance in the actual manufacturing process, though, which is
something Detroit could be taking a cue from.
===========

From: KEN OBER            
To: ALL                 
Subject: Shorts         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 15:59:26
Message Number  8397

<-->
 
Just when you thought there was enought 1/2 hour commercials for Auri,
Astonish, Amazing Woks, and DiDi-7 ... Jessica Hahn is now doing her own
1/2 hour commercial for ... What else?  A 1-900 Love Line where you can 
meet friends, dates, and even find someone to wed ... The cost is only 
$15 for 15 minutes ... And you may even be able to speak with Jessica 
herself!
 
<-->
 
The Pink Panthers are on patrol in New York City.  Travelling in groups 
with their black T-Shirts with the pink paw imprented on them, they're 
out to get rid of the over-abundence of "Gay Bashing" in NYC.  First the
Guardian Angles ... Now the Pink Panthers ... What next?  The Specialist
better watch out when he travels to NYC again!
===========

From: KEN OBER            
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 16:05:44
Message Number  8398

Yup, T'was BACK TO THE BEACH ... WOnderful movie!  I think I have it 
taped somewhere here...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/02/90 16:45:14
Message Number  8400

>I don't think music was ment to have intelligent lead singers.
 
That's too bad. Intelligent music generally ranks over inanity in my
book; might be why I'm such a fanatic Rush/Pink Floyd fan.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 16:52:03
Message Number  8403

Actually, my favorite part of "Back to the Beach" was "Ohhhh, not peanut
butter sandwiches /again!/" and the guy's father clobbering all the
surfboards.
 
That's one amazing movie--but not in a positive way.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 16:53:26
Message Number  8404

Technically, a set of Yamaha hexheads is a drum machine. The obnoxious
noisemaker that less talented would-be musicians use to back up their
obnoxious warbling is a drum synthesizer or a drum sequencer, rather
than a drum machine.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: MIDI           
Date & Time: 09/02/90 16:54:53
Message Number  8405

If you're getting a high-piched noise on your tapes when you record from
CD, the problem is in the stereo setup somewhere--that shouldn't happen.
The only problem with a tape recorded from CD should be the normal
background hiss that tape in general is subject to--and of course
reduced frequency response.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Rabid canines  
Date & Time: 09/02/90 17:09:11
Message Number  8406

>Turtle uses "Mad Reptile" Velcro.
 
Reptiles aren't fuzzy, so it's kinda hard to get Velcro to stick to us.
We prefer "Mad Reptile" epoxy.
 
>...maybe that's why he's such a babe magnet??
 
He is no such thing. Cut that out.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: jap cars       
Date & Time: 09/02/90 17:11:27
Message Number  8407

>...I think american manufacturers could improve and take a lesson from
>Korean and Japanese...
 
The Americans can make a car that's a good as a Honda Civic, no problem.
Trouble is, who'd pay twenty thousand dollars for it?
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 17:15:05
Message Number  8408

>If they start some shit, then sure, we have to kick their butts...the
>alternative is to just let that madman take over all the oil fields one
>by one...
 
I *hate* when I agree with you.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 17:17:35
Message Number  8409

>We's shoot missiles down while they were stil[l] in Iraqi air space!
 
I don't share your faith in technology--no complex weapon system is
100% effective.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: YNGLING             
Subject: HI!!!!         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 18:59:33
Message Number  8410

TY>I'll even buy the first pitcher!   
 
Yer on!
	                        A thirsty JonBoy
 
(Actually I've had my quota of beer this weekend!) :)
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: YNGLING             
Subject: weire          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:00:59
Message Number  8411

YNG>( I think you can figure out what the "f" stands for ). 
 \
But of course, m'sieur!  In the military *everything* is a B.F. and the
final initi whatever it is that you are referring to.  ie a 
hammer is a BFH. etc.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: cat            
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:04:03
Message Number  8412

T>but how well does it stick to rabid canines? 
 
Er.... is this somehow related to the subject - ie wrong genus...
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: SNAKEBYTE           
Subject: Wilmington     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:07:21
Message Number  8413

SB>WOW has it grown. 
Yeah what with Research Triangle and whatnot.  I have a lot of fond
memories from that place.  My buddy dated a gal that had a real fishin
fool for a dad.  We would take the truck, boat and cooker out there and
start a pig roasting Saturday morning.  We'd clam, gig flounder, crab
and use these to start a good ol' Cajun Gumbo in a giant kettle that 
we'd bury in the sand.  The smaller kids' job was to keep basting the
pig and keep the kettle stirrd.  Oh my!  The /memory/ of those feasts
makes my mouth water!!!!
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: BEATLE              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:11:44
Message Number  8414

B>but can you acutally out perform a CD?? 
 
CD's have been touted as the ultimate in audio.  Hah!  Their major claim
to fame is they are resistant to noise pickup with use and age if you
treat them good.  As far as audio range... an LP is capable of as good
a reproduction in practice.  In theory an LP can do better simply becaus
it is an analog media.  No matter what anyone tells you, the digital 
methods used to make CD's is not the greatest.  The sampling frequency
alone shoots the high end to hell. The music between samples is 
extrapolated.
As far as dynamic range... again the LP comes out on top.  I really don'
understand why they limited the CD as bad as they did except that the
economics and state of the art are probably the reason.  There simply
aren't enough bits to give the dynamic range that the media is capable 
of.  The strong points of CD's are their stereo seperation which unless
you are listening to something quiet and deliberately recorded on a 
single channel, you really can't perceive anyway.
My biggest bitch is that they are overpriced as hell.  The DAT's had to
be crippled so that you can't record CD's more than once, ie they have
a detector circuit that will allow you to copy a CD, but /not/ let you
copy the copy.  This is what kept the DAT from being sold for the
last 5 years while they duked it out in court over copyright infring-
ments.  They are really trying to milk the cow for as long as the 
consumer is stupid enough to pay $16 per CD.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: BIG LEW             
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:23:18
Message Number  8415

BL>where this place is? 
The intersection right before Cortez behind Rose autoparts. (57th???)
BL>And what kind of music you play? 
I play some blues type stuff, rock-n-roll and my own brand of music
that I experiment with.  For the last year I have been playing with 
an 'E' tuning which is normally used by slide players.  It has
been so long since I played with anyone, I would be hard pressed to
name anything off hand I used to play!  Lemmeesee.... Gimme Three Steps
by Skynrd, bits-n-pieces of other Skynrd stuff... Neil Young....
some Ac/DC, Van Halen.
I really should just fire up the stereo and learn some songs again.
Either that or get off my butt and finish my own songs that I work on
every now and then.  I have found that when I start programming it screw
(oops) screws up my poetic sensibilities - I can't write anymore!!!
Maybe the cold logic of the computer is in antipathy to poetry...
Gads! Whata thought!  More likely is that I'm mentally fried by the
time I finish.  Like right now I've got 80 pages of routines that I've
written for this new machine and I have to start tying it all together.
I may be a stranger to the board for the next two weeks.  After that,
I'm gonna need a party!  You furries read me????
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Nuke Kids      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:33:00
Message Number  8416

T>not the first person to claim "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" 
T>is in some way supportative of drug use. 
 
According to P McCartney - the song was written because someones kid
said it and they thought it sounded neat.  Kind of written on a "lark".
I seem to recall he said they were talking about politics and the kid
repeated what she thought she heard them say..  It's been so long ago.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:36:55
Message Number  8417

T>THANK YOU!!! .... wonderful to see someone who ... musical sensibiliti
 
I agree too.  I have a Dave Sanborn CD (Change of Heart) and there is
a song that I love but also hate...  he is such a fine sax player that 
it really pisses me off to hear him throttle back because he is trying
to play along with a soulless machine.  You can tell it's a MIDI track
Sighhhh with real live musicians at least the tempo can change and flow
as the situation calls for.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: HI!!!!         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:40:06
Message Number  8418

T>Count me in, if this message isn't obsolete already...
 
Nope, we just need to pick a suitable Friday night and do it!
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:54:28
Message Number  8420

CPU>Great! Tell me the time and place. If I can, I'll be there. 
 
Let's get a consensus. I don't wanna lay down anything that would
not agree with everyone.  A Friday or Saturday night is Ok by me for
a large get together.  A wednesday would be good (Taco Night!) for a
small get together.
Let's hear some preferences folks!
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 19:58:11
Message Number  8421

CPU>I have no earthly, heavenly, or hades-like way of knowing where the 
CPU>"Dog House" is.
 
It is AKA as Mulcahey's Dog House and is the intesection before you get
to Cortez going north on 41.  I beleive this is 57th street.  It is 
exactly behind Rose's Auto Parts.  The reason they call it the Dog House
is because they bring in their specialty hot dogs from Pennsylvania.
They also serve seafood, finger food (Buffalo wings, Tacos, Fried
Mushrooms, cheese sticks etc) and other Mexican food.  They have a 
full bar that runs right down the middle of the place, they have darts,
the bandstand, a basketball shoot, a bigscreen TV and a couple of bar
TV's.  More like a pub really than a restraunt or bar.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Yeah!!!        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 20:07:22
Message Number  8422

TS>doncha think...coordinate on what songs we know and can play?
 
Hmmm... that /does/ keep down on nuisance beer bottle throwing.  This
is getting a little confusing.  I would like to just have a get together
sometime to meet some more of you folks and I'm familiar with the Dog
House.  I figured it would be neat and maybe plink around with some of
the instruments since some of you are musicians.  As far as actually
/playing/ anything, you're right.  The people there ( a fun loving 
bunch) would assume that we had played together and could actually 
play something identifiable as "music".  It would be cool to have
someplace to get together to jam.  I would volunteer my place but it
would be awhile as I tend to live like a slob when I have more than
one project going (btrutal honesty never hurts!:> )  When I get finished
and can clean the place up, we can have a party here.  The neighbors
are already broke in! ]:>  Who has what and can anyone sing?  I play
elctric and acoustic I have a Crate 40 watt practise amp and three
electrics and two 12 strings.  If we really sound shitty I have a stereo
to console us.  Anyone else have a place to get together?
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: KEN OBER            
Subject: 900 numbers    
Date & Time: 09/02/90 20:19:55
Message Number  8423

KO>A 1-900 Love Line   And you may even be able to speak with Jessica 
 
Gag! <retch> #barf#  In a nutshell - 900 numbers are what is wrong
with America.
                          A Queasy JonBoy
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: friends        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 20:22:29
Message Number  8424

T>Marriage is a silly (and obsolete) concept.
 
Ok, <grumble>  I'll byte... /why/ is it an obsolete concept?
 
                                    JonBoy
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: JONBOY              
Subject: HI!!!!         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:15:02
Message Number  8425

Friday? Bad night, dude...can't get things started until after work
( 6 - 6:30 or later)...now Saturdays we could start whenever we felt
like it. :)
                             The Yngling ("If the sun's not over the
                             yardarm yet, well, lower the goddam yard-
                             arm!")
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:18:31
Message Number  8426

To quote the Bay City Rollers ( ghod, who ever thought I'd be doing
that? ) : "S...A...T...U...R...D...A...Y...night!"
                               The Yngling
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: JONBOY              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:20:22
Message Number  8427

If I may elaborate on what you have already said: The DogHouse is 
located in a small shopping center called The 41 Center.  It is on
the East side of U.S. 41 (on the right if you are northbound) right
after McDonalds.  And they make great sandwiches as well as Mexican
food.  
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Paintwars      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:25:57
Message Number  8428

Rufus,
Is the Paintwar scheduled for the 8th or what?  Need to know ASAP.
Call me by voice if you want to to confirm or deny.
                                  The Yngling
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: KEN OBER            
Subject: Not Lacey      
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:49:47
Message Number  8429

 I think that was Frankie Avalon.......
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:50:34
Message Number  8430

 
      Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
  OK OK! You got me!!!!!! I never really got into Floyd much, never
 got past the Wall.... Diehard Iron Maiden fan(I HATE Somewhere in Time)
(Piece of dog doo). I guess they're pretty smart...they can write...
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: friends        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:53:56
Message Number  8431

  Are you saying we've evolved past marriage?
 I think marriage has evolved past us.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 21:56:36
Message Number  8432

 
  but he doesn't care about Saudi Arabia! (much)
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: JONBOY              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:04:44
Message Number  8433

    By Jove! Jolly good! I say!
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:17:20
Message Number  8434

>I'd suggest just ripping the door off. 
     
   Do you rip off body parts of yourself when they get in the way?
Hmph. See if the Green B*tch (notice: she is NOT the Green Bitch. The
splat must be pronounced correctly.) ever lets you in...
                Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:19:15
Message Number  8435

I only have an electric wazoo. No electric kazoos.
I haven't seen a mouth harp for ages...
           Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Yo! Furry Fen! 
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:21:32
Message Number  8436

>I just can't seem to relate to little kids...
     
   I understand that idea precisely. Anyone who calls 'em "little
angels" has NOT either babysitted for them or been one themself.
               Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:22:53
Message Number  8437

>The alternative is to just let that madman take over all the oil 
fields one by one until he's got a monopoly on them...
       
   My God! You mean he's going to attack Mexico, Alaska, and Siberia
next?! What is that madman Hussein up to, now?
     
   Seriously, the most Hussein can hope for (and a damned low chance
at that) is to take over the entire Middle East. Though it has a signif-
icant amount of the world's oil reserves, it's by no means a monopoly.
Remember, y'all: America DOES have some oil of its own.
            Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: KEN OBER            
Subject: Shorts         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:29:32
Message Number  8438

The Guardian Angles? Sounds like an obtuse group to me.
          Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: friends        
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:30:38
Message Number  8439

>Marriage is a silly (and obsolete) concept.
      
<RED FLASHING LIGHTS GO OFF FROM HORN!> Uhh... Turtle. I don't think
so. You might feel sex is -- and should be -- a form of recreation;
you might feel sexual monogamy is unimportant for a relationship,
but there is one vital purpose of marriage (even common law marriage.)
Keeping the species alive.
   Sure -- a woman can have a baby out of wedlock, if she chooses. I
don't believe there should be any problems with that. But -- any man
who would get a woman pregnant, then leave her is a very low man in
my book. (Let me tell you the story of Angeles sometime.) Marriage is
an attempt to give the woman some legal protection for the sake of
the child. (It also should serve other, more personal, purposes. But
that's the main reason.)
   Let's face it. Men and women are different. It's physically possible
for a man to have hundreds of children and forget about them. It's not
so easy on the woman. Call marriage something that gives the woman
"a level field."
                    Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: JONBOY              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:40:37
Message Number  8440

Two weeks from now, I'll be up in Jacksonville, wishing my filly a
very happy birthday. (Very happy, indeed. We haven't seen each other
for months.) But, three weeks from now -- the weekend of the 22nd and
23rd would be fantastic! How 'bout y'all?
     
   Also, about the Animation festival: I'm going next weekend, on the
night of the Eighth. Anyone else want to join in, leave me a message.
                   Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/02/90 22:44:02
Message Number  8441

Jonboy,
   The last message's date can be changed. Wednesday night for tacos?
Yum! Great!
   How 'bout THIS Wednesday for our first practice?
   Oh... by the way. What will the band be called?
              Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: KEN OBER            
Subject: Shorts         
Date & Time: 09/02/90 23:59:51
Message Number  8442

Oooh, shake, shake...
"Thtop!  You mithcreant!  Theath and dethistht!  I won't HEAR of you 
making fun of me aGAIN."  [points to shirt]  "I'm  Pink Panther, you 
know!"
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: jap cars       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 00:04:07
Message Number  8443

T>...who'd pay twenty thousand dollars for it?
  
"Oh, right, that's my point exactly."  Monty Python
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 00:05:23
Message Number  8444

TS>alternative is to just let that madman take over the oil fields...
 
T>I *hate* when I agree with you.
  
Uh, me too!   Er...Gun proliferation!  Nuclear power plants!  uh...
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 00:07:26
Message Number  8445

T>I don't share your faith in technology -- no complex weapon system
T>is 100% effective.
  
No, but don't forget...Uncle Sam is a belt and suspenders man.  Lotsa
backups to minimize casualties as much as possible.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: YNGLING             
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 00:16:34
Message Number  8446

Yes, and it is on the intersection of 49th and 41... (57th is far down 
the street...it's before 53rd, even...)
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: ALL                 
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 00:21:59
Message Number  8447

CPU asked what we would call the band.  Personally, I believe that I'd
like to hear the band play BEFORE we go off half-cocked and start 
giving it a name...
  
  Other thoughts?
===========

From: ANGEL               
To: *.*                 
Subject: cleaning crew  
Date & Time: 09/03/90 03:41:53
Message Number  8449

    "Don't argue, Reginald.  Of course, this is the place.  The captain
warned us to expect the unusual.  From what other local bar would we
hear gun shots?"  Few even glanced up to see the two new-comers enter
the Pub.  Of course, to view the one, a person would have to glance
VERY far up ... the giraffe and baboon stood in the doorway surveying
the assortment of strange beings and the carnage left first from the
explosion and then from the recent gunshot.
    "Uhhh, I, uh, don't think the first plan is gonna work.  Who do
we ask, Trixie?"  asked the Giraffe.  The baboon chose a person at
random and crossed over to Rufus.  "Excuse me, sir.  I'm first mate
Trixie of the _Billie C_, who might be in charge here?"  Rufus, glad
to have a temporary respite from Mulligan's questioning, pointed
the baboon toward Xonzoff.  "Thank you ... nice coat."
    The giraffe, Reginald, followed Trixie to the bar.  "Mr. Xonzoff,
Captain Hec sent us here to remove the wreckage of a piano she brought
here."
    "Fine," said Xon, "you're welcome to it."
    "Unfortunatly, we will have a modicum of difficulty accomplishing
our task.  We did not wish to admit this to our captain, but neither
one of us knows what a piano is.  We thought we could enter your
establishment and identify the article by the fact that it was in 
pieces.  However, it seems that more than just the piano in question
has been damaged here today.  Could you please identify which item
of wreckage is our?" Following Xon's indication, the pair went to the
soggy and still-smoldering remains of the piano.  Reginald placed
the piano bench on his back.  Trixie hoisted the box of piano rolls
on one shoulder and the piano on the other.  "Oh, I nearly forgot,
... Reginald, the package."  The giraffe snaked his neck around to
the pouch that was strapped to his back and removed a small package
which he dropped on the bar.  "This is from Captain Hecuba to Donthen,
with her regards."  With that, the bell-bottomed baboon and the
giraffe left.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: BEATLE              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:18:43
Message Number  8452

>  I take it that you and Zot plan  on going to this dog house jam??
 
Errr, not really. I dunno.....
Someone know if there is some silly age restriction for this place?
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:23:06
Message Number  8453

>Hey, do you wanna play for the band?
>I understand that you are a killer bass..
 
Yea, when Zot starts swinging that bass around, you should get out of
the way.  Of course, his favorite bass trick is sticking the neck in a
ceiling fan.  In all honesty, I haven't heard him play for a while.  I
assume he's improved.
 
   ...to be really honest, 	I haven't heard anything in the past 17 
hours.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: TURTLE              
Subject: made in USA    
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:30:21
Message Number  8454

You haven't heard my new motto for GM yet, have you?
"GM- We design flaws better than anyone else."
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Rabid canines  
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:32:48
Message Number  8455

>We prefer "Mad Reptile" epoxy.
 
Doesn't GE make that?
 
>He is no such thing [a babe magnet]. Cut that out.
 
Yea, right, sure.  We believe you.
 
 
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:41:33
Message Number  8456

Re: a large get together.
Friday or Saturday sounds good to me.  Wednesday depends on the whimsy
of my teachers.  Question:  Is there some age requirment?
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: YNGLING             
Subject: Paintwars      
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:45:07
Message Number  8457

Yngling, it is off for the 8th.  As in N-O for a number of reasons,
which I'll explain later.  My BBS should have been back up this moment,
but my software has decided to wretch and vomit.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:47:07
Message Number  8458

>  Do you rip off body parts of yourself when they get in the way?
 
Luckily, none have gotten in the way yet.
 
>See if the Green B*tch ever lets you in...
 
How about if I apologize?  She's such a lovable car.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:50:15
Message Number  8459

>  Also, about the Animation festival: I'm going next weekend, on the 
>night of the Eighth.
 
Well, I know I'll be going on the 8th w/ Roy and Mark (via Lakeland, no
less).  I assume I'll see you there...
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 13:52:56
Message Number  8460

"Half-cocked" and "Other Thoughts" sound like some good names.
Or "JonBoy and the Biohazards."
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 14:07:41
Message Number  8461

 
  Band on the run! Hahahahahaha!
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: mMIDI          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 17:54:12
Message Number  8463

The CD's dynamic range is so limited because at the time it was
difficult to mass-produce CD's that were good enough to provide
that sort of information density without errors, and the error
detection and correction algorithm the CD player uses isn't all
that sophisticated. Result: wasted bits (like 4 bits from every 14-bit
word are there for error detection) and loss of dynamic range. They
coulda fixed the problem by making the disc store less music, but Sony
wanted one disc to be able to record all of Beethoven's 5th Symphony,
for bizzare reasons concerning Japan's almost religious fascination with
that piece. (This bit of knowledge isn't as apocryphal as it sounds;
I got it from one of Radio Shack's tech manuals on their first CD
player.)
 
It's easy to see why the CD's are so outrageously overpriced. At the
time they first came onto the market, there was exactly one company
making CD blanks in quantities large enough to supply the major labels.
As a result, the blanks (and finished CD's) were very expensive. Later,
when people started realizing just how phenomenally the CD was catching
on, the record companies realized that a sixteen-buck price tag didn't
seem to bother anyone all that much, so they kept the price artificially
high. It's actually cost-effective to sell CD's at the same price you'd
sell tapes for, but nobody wants to do it as long as people are willing
to pay almost twice as much for 'em...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Cat house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 18:00:55
Message Number  8464

>Maybe the cold logic of the computer is in antipathy to poetry...
 
Nuts to that! They're both an art form.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: made in USA    
Date & Time: 09/03/90 18:03:26
Message Number  8465

>[The Japanese] were slapped on the pee-pee for ruining the US semi-
>conductor industry...particularly DRAMS...
 
Funny thing there. Good ol' Ronnie "Nuke 'Em All" Reagan responded to
pressure from Texas Instruments (and others) in regards to the
Japanese undercutting US RAMs, and slapped a high tariff on the import
RAM to "protect American jobs." Result? The nasty RAM shortage we're all
familiar with from a few years back which blew up the price of RAM's
so high that a lot of small American computer and electronics companies
went under. Net impact on American jobs: about 30,000 more people went
jobless than what would have happened if Reagan hadn't gotten so antsy
in the first place. (Gods--how many magazine ads have I seen that said
"If you're selling DRAM, we're buying...Price and availability subject
to DRAM availability...RAM surcharge on some products..."
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 18:08:11
Message Number  8466

Friday or Saturday nights are good with me for some sort of shindig--
the First Weekly A/R Musicfest, perhaps? :) Weekday evenings fairly
late (like after 6ish) are also acceptable.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: ALL                 
Subject: UBAFTM         
Date & Time: 09/03/90 19:43:34
Message Number  8469

Yes, after 4 hours of playing "Make a BBS from 16 parts," Uncle Bob's
Alligator Farm and Tofu Museum is open.
That number is: 371-3498
3/12/2400
[Hit return after CD so the modem from hell knows yer baud]
 
Remember, if it ain't Tofu, it's probably better off.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: RUFUS               
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 21:07:45
Message Number  8472

R>"Half-cocked" and "Other Thoughts" sound like some good names.
R>Or "JonBoy and the Biohazards".
  
Now, cut that out!  
  
  
  
Hmmm...thought that last one *does* sound pretty good.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: ALL MUSICIANS       
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/03/90 21:25:40
Message Number  8473

Hmmm.  I would like to propose a tenative roster for the band:
  
Lead Guitar--  JonBoy
Rythm Guitar - The Specialist
Bass Guitar -  Zot Gnop
Keyboard ---   ???  (I can play a little but not much)
Percussion --  ???  (I have a friend who plays a little)
B/U Drums  --  Beatle/Spellwind  (Should be able to keep a rythm)
Brass/Woodwind-???  Any suggestions or volunteers?
  
I dunno who else wants to join or even anyone else who can play.
Note that this roster is **Tentative**!  Also, did I miss any 
instruments that someone out there can play? All who want to perform,
RESPONDEZ VOUS SIL VOUS PLAIT!
  
Also, where we gonna rehearse?
===========

From: OMNI                
To: *.*                 
Subject: ....           
Date & Time: 09/03/90 21:36:03
Message Number  8474

   At the moment that the girrafe and the babbon leave the bar, another
patron enters.  He stops at the doorway, adjusting his multifaceted 
eyes to the light, and walks to the bar.  
  Xon responds to his wave after a few minutes.
  "Do you have any drinks which are not alcohol based?"  the patron
asks in a high thin voice.
  Xon nods, and says "Anything in particular you need?"
  "No," it responds.  "How about some fruit juice?"
  Xon nods and retreats to the room behind the bar.
  Youg looks to the commotion and studies it intently, paying particular
attention to the injured man with the trashed coat.  It is apparent from
the condition of the bar that the assassin robot did not accomplish it's
assigned mission.  Though Youg's face cannot imply emotion, he is 
experiencing a mix of irritablity and anxiety.  
  "Here's your drink," says a voice behind him.  He turns and takes 
the drink.  
   "That'll be six pieces," says Xon.  
  Youg reaches into a pocket and pulls out a ten piece.  "Here," and
throws it on the counter.  Internal alarms are silenced by the 
imbibement of the fruit juice.  A message sounds in his brain...
"Phagocytic index normal."
  "One more thing...do you have any communication devices here?"
===========

From: ANTIC FREDDY        
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:17:08
Message Number  8476

  well.. i see you have 2 allready, but i play a mean guitar... 
rhythm and/or lead...
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: YNGLING             
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:24:00
Message Number  8477

YNG>To quote the Bay City Rollers ( ghod, who ever thought I'd be doing 
YNG>that? )
 
Good question!!!  Ummm has it been an Ok weekend for you.  Y'know,
too much sun can make one halucinate and in extreme cases delirium
sets in...
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:32:22
Message Number  8478

R>Someone know if there is some silly age restriction for this place?  
 
Hell no!  The place is crawlin with rug-rats early on about 5:00 to 6:00
The families usually leave about 7:00 or so.  This place is more like a
tavern than a bar OR a restaraunt.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:35:12
Message Number  8479

Friday or Saturday sounds good to me.
 
So far three Saturdays from now seems to be the one that most people
can make.  No age restriction and I would like to point out that it
apparently has gone over most folks heads that on one hand the musical
people wanna get together and on the other - just a general get-together
Specialist is right - we need to get together someplace "offline" to
see what we sound like.  No sense in assulting innocent people with
aural torture.
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: CD's           
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:39:46
Message Number  8480

The thing that really slays me about CD hype is the 4..N x oversampling.
What a load!  The oversmapling is there also for tracking infornmation
and is consulted ONCE at the start.  I had a guy try to tell me 
(I *love* playing stupid with smartass salesmen and then taking them out
) that the oversampling was for "more samples means that it reads more
of the music off the disc".  Oh boy - yesterday I couldn't spell
oversampling...
===========

From: JONBOY              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: made in USA    
Date & Time: 09/03/90 22:45:01
Message Number  8481

T>
T>Result? The nasty RAM shortage we're allfamiliar with...
 
Well, it was a case of shooting long after the duck flew over.  All but
two manufacturers of DRAMS had called it quits when the action was 
taken.  It would be interesting to speculate on what would have happened
three years earlier...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: friends        
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:00:04
Message Number  8485

The idea of marriage in the context of a society in which 50 to 75%
of all marriages fal within five years, and one in which you can go
down to the local office supply store and pick up a pad of fifty
do-it-yourself divorce forms (NO JOKE) is obviously an ideal that's
no longer terribly relevant in that society. The /ideals/ behind
marriage (ie, commitment to another individual) are still perfectly
valid, and there are some non-idealistic (ie, economic) reasons for
two people to get married, but the act itself clearly has little value
in a society that takes marriage as lightly as this one does.
 
I also have other problems with the idea--it seems to me that a lot of
people conside their spouse almost as their property, which bothers me
immensely. It also seems to me that to many people the one overriding
concern to a marriage isn't anything as idealistic as a loving
commitment or anything as practical as the creation of a stable platform
from which to build a family--it's sex, pure and simple. Most people
will /claim/ that sex is not the most important part of a relationship,
or the most important aspect of love, but sexual infedility will
destroy a marriage with amazing swiftness. Kinda like saying "No, sex
isn't the reason I love you, but if you perform a sexual act I dis-
approve of consider the love part null and void." Manifest Bullshit (tm)
that be...anyway, I'll stop ranting now before I REALLY get going.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:08:17
Message Number  8486

>Diehard Iron Maiden fan(I HATE Somewhere in Time)...
 
That's because you're brain-damaged, boy. Somewhere in Time is one of
Maiden's best albums--"Caught Somewhere in Time," "Stranger in a Strange
Land," and "Wasted Years" are all excellent songs. I also like the
albums "Powerslave" and "Piece of Mind," and "Seventh Son..." has some
good tunes on it as well (the best being "Infinite Dreams").
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:12:29
Message Number  8487

>I only have an electric wazoo.
 
You mean they make /mechanical/ FIDO handshaking protocols? For what,
the Difference Engine? I didn't know WaZOO had been ported over to
any of Babbage's machines...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: friends        
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:14:34
Message Number  8488

Marriage, as I said, does have some value when you consider it as a
platform from which to raise a family. However, it's rather easy to
sire children out of wedlock, now, isn't it? Where's your "level
playing field" in that case? In a time where sexual intercourse out-
side of wedlock was a rare occurance, marriage served precisely the
function you describe. In a society where sex outside of wedlock is
more common than sex within wedlock, marriage is no longer likely to
serve this purpose; clearly, something else is needed. I am all for
a system which obligates a male to behave responsibly if he should 
father children; however, increasingly often marriage isn't that system.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Shorts         
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:18:44
Message Number  8489

>Oooh, shake, shake...
>"Thtop! You mithcreant! Theath and dethistht!..."
 
I know of at least one bisexual individual who has earned seven
black belts in seven unrelated martial arts. He was jumped one evening
by three "racially disturbed youth" (read: gang members) in one of
Ft. Myers' seedier neighborhoods one evening; all three of 'em ended
up in the hospital, one in intensive care. He suffered a broken toe
on his left foot when he kicked one of his opponents.
 
Not all gays match your stereotype.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Rules of..     
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:21:58
Message Number  8490

>Gun proliferation!
 
We have that already, don't we?
 
>Nuclear power plants!
 
I'd be all for 'em if the people who build and run 'em knew their ass
from a hole in the ground. I used to be a /very/ fanatic nuclear power
advocate; the thing that made me a little more cautious is our very own
Crystal River plant. You seen the sort of dipshits who are responsible
for that place? I wouldn't let these people park my car! 'Course, it
also doesn't help that the people who design the goddamn things
generally failed outta grade school. I read one report (issued by the
Nuclear Regulatory Agency, natch) that complained the control rooms in
most nuclear power plants are so badly designed that they'll put
controls fifteen feet away from displays that correspond to those
controls, stupid shit like that. Add that to a general reluctance on the
part of utility companies to invest i things like fast/slow breeder
pairs and plants fueled by ceramic fuel rods (you can't get a meltdown
in such a plant; cooling fails and the whole thing just sits there
without doin' squat but the rods cost twice as much as conventional
fuel rods so nobody's interested) and you got a Godawful mess.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:30:45
Message Number  8491

"JonBoy and the Biohazards".../like/ it! It's got this ring...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:32:34
Message Number  8492

>...did I miss any instruments that someone out there can play?
 
Depends how you define "play," I guess. I used (read: USED) to mess
around with drums, but it's been 'bout five years since I even so much
as touched a drum kit...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: CD's           
Date & Time: 09/03/90 23:35:11
Message Number  8493

"more samples means that it reads more of the music off the disc."
I LOVE it! How come I never get any salespeople like that??
 
In CD's defense, though, I will say one thing about the media: it
exhibits graceful degredation, which you can't get from an analog
medium. Take an LP and wipe out some of the information on it, you
get a really obnoxious POP! when you hit the damaged area. CD's store
contiguous samples non-contiguously and can extrapolate to fill in
errors, so if you start losing information you get a smooth inter-
polation and no hideous noise. 'Course, a typical CD player will
register about a thousand errors (not necessarily non-recoverable)
a minute on a good day, and I've heard of players notching up five
thousand read errors per minute...seems like the medium coulda used
some work before it hit the market, hmm?
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 02:31:11
Message Number  8499

YES! YES!      no (WINCE)
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: JONBOY              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/04/90 02:33:22
Message Number  8500

YEEE HAW Halleluja and pass the ammunition!
Of course, some people play their voice better than others.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: TURTLE              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/04/90 02:35:30
Message Number  8501

Actually, it should take several attempts at listening to a song to get 
the full effect. You can't just hear a song once or twice and be able to
immediately make a sound judgement as to its value. You should listen 
once for the melody, once or twice for the lyrics, a couple of times for
the individual instruments, and once for the over all affect.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: JONBOY              
Subject: HI!!!!         
Date & Time: 09/04/90 03:10:19
Message Number  8502

WHERE WHERE WHERE is this "Dog House"?????  Sounds like Heaven with 
an amp.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: RUFUS               
Subject: cat            
Date & Time: 09/04/90 03:17:55
Message Number  8503

I thought CRT was Cheerfully Ridiculous Tennis shoes? How about a 
happy medium: Charmingly Repulsive Tennis shoes!
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 04:13:29
Message Number  8504

CPU>I haven't seen a mouth harp in ages.
 
I've got one... and I'm damn good with it, too.
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:13:19
Message Number  8505

TS> Uncle Sam is a belt and suspenders man.
   
Let's hope he doesn't forget shirt and pants.
              C.P.U.
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:16:06
Message Number  8506

CPU>See if the Green B*tch ever lets you in...
R>H
ow about if I apologize? She's such a lovable car.
     
    Hmph. Ask her, not me. And don't blame me if she slams the
trunk door on you. (Yup -- it's happened before.)
     
   Anyway, how's the van doing?
             CPU
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:20:23
Message Number  8507

JonBoy and the Biohazards? Sounds hideous. We'll take it.
             CPU
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:21:30
Message Number  8508

GROWL!!!!! You forgot about the unicorn!!! HMPH!
      
   After being one of the ones to push for it... <SIGH!>
     
   Can you use another rhythm guitar? (I'm more trained in classical,
but...) Woodwinds: clarinet. I can fake some keyboards, too... (but I
can't supply 'em.) 
                       the peeved CPU
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:26:57
Message Number  8509

>I didn't know WaZOO had been ported over to any of Babbage's
>machines...
     
   Not Babbage's machine. Turing's.
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: ZOT GNOP            
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:33:49
Message Number  8510

CPU>I haven't seen a mouth harp in ages.
ZG>...I'm damn good with it.
    
By the way, how the heck do you manage to fit 88 strings into your
mouth?
      :)          CPU
     
Seriously, I've played around with it a bit, but I'm not good.
   
===========

From: MAX                 
To: TURTLE              
Subject: CD's           
Date & Time: 09/04/90 13:44:57
Message Number  8511

According to a recent issue of "High Fidelity" and an article on	 CD
players, your "1000 errors a minute" for a typical CD player is high by
an order of magnitude for a disc that's in good condition.
 
> seems like the medium coulda used some work before it hit the market,
> hmm?
 
And what would you propose?  In real-world conditions, any medium is
going to suffer wear and tear far beyond any ideal... CDs, or whatever
medium you are talking about, are going to be mishandled, scratched,
left out of the case, dropped and occasionally abused in ways far too
horrible for someone who respects music to contemplate.  I still don't
think there's any PRACTICAL alternative to compact discs with superior
sound reproduction and significantly less susceptibility to real world
problems.  DATs don't cut it, and won't unless the recording industry
changes its collective mind (?) and supports the format as strongly as
they are doing with CDs; since the DAT and CD sampling rate are
deliberately incompatible, a recording of a CD on a DAT is going to be
about the same quality as a metal tape recorded on a Dolby C/HX Pro
deck, on a medium that's twice as expensive.  The format that will
replace CDs isn't here yet -- and as I said before, I think we'rea
already approaching the "point of mootability," the level of fidelity
where doubling the resolution, frequency response, etc. won't matter
unless you're sitting in an acoustically perfect sound laboratory or,
in some cases, unless you're a computer.  The difference between a
30,000 KHz high end and a 60,000 KHz one is, unless you're a dog, a
moot point.
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 16:21:55
Message Number  8512

Chip,
>America DOES have some oil of its own.
Ah, but does she have enough to supply her friends?  Remember, its like
my mother used to tell me when I was a little The Yngling, "If you dont
have enough to share, don't get it out."
    Seriously, I think you are intelligent enough to understand the
social and economic upheaval that would be experienced WORLDWIDE if any
one man/government gained control of such a large portion of the World's
oil supply.  This conflict is /not/ centered on the price of gas up at
Starvin' Marvin's - it is an attempt to prevent the decimation of the
economies of nearly every major industrialized nation on the planet.
                                    The Yngling
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 16:36:24
Message Number  8513

I volunteer to be the designated drinker for all rehearsals and/or
performances ( its a dirty job but....) 
                                 The Yngling
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: JONBOY              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 17:44:35
Message Number  8515

>The place is crawlin with rug-rats early on...
 
Errr, okay.  But I really despise rug-rats, and small children in 
general.  JonBoy, I'd jump on Turtle's shell about him copying
that show for you...he's got the tapes...
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 17:46:15
Message Number  8516

>No sense in assulting innocent people with aural torture.
 
Why not?
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: JONBOY              
Subject: CD's           
Date & Time: 09/04/90 17:47:28
Message Number  8517

>I had a guy try to tell me that the oversampling was for "more samples
>means that it reads more of the music off the disc".
 
So that's why I never hear any lyrics on my CDs.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Green b*tch    
Date & Time: 09/04/90 17:55:27
Message Number  8518

>  Anyway, how's the van doing?
 
Oh, we sold the van.  We are now the proud owners of a Dodge Paganmobile
(read Dodge Ram Charger).  Sure, it gets 15 miles to the gallon, 20 on
the highway, but at least the seats don't tilt, and I've seen better
suspension on some rocks.  It's not a bad car, but there are so many 
little flaws in it...sheesh.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 17:57:59
Message Number  8519

>By the way, how the heck do you manage to fit 88 strings into your
>mouth?
 
You've never seen Zot's mouth, have you?
 
  ....you should see him play the mouth pipe organ.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/04/90 18:14:00
Message Number  8520

 A FEW (couple) of the songs were OK, but the rest stunk bull.
Trivia: The name of the first lead singer in Iron Maiden...?
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 19:49:12
Message Number  8522

 
  Thanks for the vocab. In today's world, where everything that is 
technical has three times as many names as the inventors, it helps to 
know that someone can tell what they're talking about...
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Nuke Kids      
Date & Time: 09/04/90 19:54:29
Message Number  8523

 
  Well, yer real close. The official story  (from every Beatle) was that
John's first son, Julian, did a drawing of a schoolmate, Lucy, and said 
it was "Lucy in the sky with diamonds." Lennon was picking sources from 
all over at that point. Another song on "Sgt. Pepper" was taken pretty 
much from an antique circus poster.
 
  That story is the second most mentioned Beatle fact. The other one (at
least in my expierence) is John Lennon's appology for his "bigger than 
Christ" statement. I can quote that.
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/04/90 20:05:23
Message Number  8524

 
> Band on the run!
 
  Ha! I like that. It fits in with the chaos of the messages, doesn't it
....
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 20:08:42
Message Number  8525

 
   I'd just like to sit in and see some good live music or jamming... I
would, however, like a chance to TRY drumming. I've only been behind a 
REAL set (had a cheap toy one for years) once in my life, but I beat out
rhythms constantly on anything 
available. And some others will say I also make incessantly annoying 
(supposed) drum imitations with my mouth. I've also been known to play 
my chest and belly. :)
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/04/90 20:15:41
Message Number  8526

 
> "JonBoy and the Biohazards".../like/ it!
 
  I think that /definitely/ be it. I think it just sounds neat when you
say it, and it's controversial
too...
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 20:23:56
Message Number  8527

 
> Errr, okay.  But I really despise rug-rats, and small children in 
> general.
 
  You don't seem too enthusiastic about this. 
 
  Do you really think these rug-rats are going to take to you, though?
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 20:25:24
Message Number  8528

>> No sense in....aural torture.
 
> Why not?
 
I'm all for aural torture... let's do it!!
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: ANTIC FREDDY        
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:38:16
Message Number  8529

It's up to JonBoy...he is de facto the leader of the band.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Rules of..     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:44:25
Message Number  8530

Now cut that out!  I was trying to get back at odds with you!  Oh, I 
know!
  
  
Bash Homos!  Bash Homos!
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:45:59
Message Number  8531

T>I used...to mess around with drums,
  
Can you play?  Yes, or no...can you play?  (Keep a beat with all for
the general purpose of maintaining the background rhythm?)  Nothing
complicated, if you can't hang we can get someone else.  Not that
*I* have any say, I believe that JonBoy is the Band leader.  (By
default.)
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:53:24
Message Number  8534

CPU>Let's hope he doesn't forget shirt and pants.
  
Cute, real cute.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:54:27
Message Number  8535

CPU>Can you used another rhythm guitar?
  
That's up to JonBoy (defacto Leader of the Biohazards).
 
CPU>Woodwinds: Clarinet...I can fake some keyboards, too...(but I can't
CPU>supply 'em.)
  
I dunno what they have there in the way of Keyboards...JB?  
  
  
HEY!  All this talk about MIDI and none of us have actually thought 
to bring a MIDI system to play!  I have a freind...maybe he'll let us
borrow his MIDI setup...hmmmm....bears investigation.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: YNGLING             
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/04/90 21:59:03
Message Number  8536

YNG>I volunteer to be the designated drinker...
  
Wow.  Y'know, I don't believe that we have filled that position yet. 
I vote in favor (strongly!) on your behalf...but (as always) it's up
to JonBoy.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Really?        
Date & Time: 09/04/90 22:05:26
Message Number  8537

SW>I wish I were born in Japan.
  
Not too late, you know.  Emmigrate.  Bye.  Don't forget to forget to 
write.  Have fun learning Japanese.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: MAX                 
Subject: Wyverns Den    
Date & Time: 09/04/90 22:06:52
Message Number  8538

So, like, when will Xon answer OMNI?
===========

From: THRUD               
To: ALL                 
Subject: bears          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 22:27:30
Message Number  8539

midi.....bears investigation.......hmmm, Gjolp wants  to know if 
somebody was paging her - she's is in fact the Chief Bear Investigator
in these parts.
===========

From: THRUD               
To: ZOT GNOP            
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/04/90 22:36:02
Message Number  8541

Ok, ya listen to a tune half a dozen times to fully appreciate it.
But how many times do you watch a video to catch a cleavage shot?
Answer - as many times as it takes.
                                   Thrud
===========

From: THRUD               
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/04/90 22:51:09
Message Number  8542

Aural torture, as long as it's spelled properly, is perfectly
acceptable in most states.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/05/90 00:17:54
Message Number  8544

JB> No sense in assaulting innocent people with aural torture.
 
No such thing as an innocent. I say let 'em WRITHE!!!!!
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: ALL                 
Subject: Bleedin' Weird 
Date & Time: 09/05/90 00:42:03
Message Number  8545

  The dwarf looks up into the bewildered insurance salesman's face.
  "ZOT! WHERE !?!"
  He looks around desperately as if to locate some imagined foe. 
  "Oh. Oh yeah, me. Well, uh... So Ruf, how ya been?"
  Suddenly perplexed by his old friend's odd behavior, Rufus barely 
notices the giraffe and baboon that have chosen this moment to enter the
bar.
  "Ghods, Zot! How did you get here? I thought you had been killed when 
that Vogon ship exploded."
  "It's...er...a long story. I'll tell ya bout sometime, eh." Zot 
answers vaguely. 
  Looking around again, this time taking a better look at his 
surroundings, Zot gives forth a long low whistle.
  "These are some WEIRD bleedin' dudes in dis joint!" Spying the giant, 
Zot exclaims, "Hey, get a load of the BIG guy! He's like somethin outta
THOR."
  "By the way, is it always so violent in here? I was under the 
impression that firearms and energy weapons were tabboo on this hunk of 
rock."
  Rufus is about to suggest a hasty withdrawal to avoid any more mention
of high tech paraphernalia around the authorities, when his attention is
drawn to the strange noise emenating from Zot's long black bag. 
  It starts at the edge of his senses, almost imperceptible, like a gnat
buzzing around his ear. But soon it grows to very audible proportions. 
So audible, in fact, that soon several other patrons of the bar hear it
too. A high pitched whine that sounds vaguely familiar, yet also very
alien. However, it is not just a solid tone. Slight changes in pitch and
vibrato soon become apparent, until a definite melody is at last 
achieved. 
  Turtle listens intently, head cocked to one side. 
  "That sounds a lot like an intro to a Metallica song I know."
  "No its not. Its an ancient mariner's song. I'd recognize it 
anywhere."
  "You're both wrong. It is that song which the Valkyries sing as they
ride to a battle."
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: ALL                 
Subject: The Song       
Date & Time: 09/05/90 01:19:13
Message Number  8546

  It appears that everyone hears a different melody. And not just any 
melody, but one which has special significance to each individual. To
every one who can hear it, the song tells of home and of longing and of
loneliness. Yet....it has no words, just a melody. A simple melody.
  
  With a swift fluid motion, accompanied by a loud curse, Zot flings the
bag over everyones' heads and into the far corner of the bar.
  "DAMN YOUR MISERABLE STRINGS!!!   I told you not to do that in public!
Now I suppose I'm gonna be asked to play for you all. Play my MAGNIFCENT
instrument." The words are dripping with sarcasm and rage. "Well nothing
doing! I ain't goin near that thing til it learns to behave in public."
  With that, Zot goes up to the bar and yells, "Gimme somethin' with 
LOTS of alcohol in it. And bring the whole bottle!"
===========

From: BIG LEW             
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 09:57:11
Message Number  8553

Well, if you find out where it is and y'all get together, will you let 
me know?  I don't play, but would love to join in the fun!
===========

From: BIG LEW             
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Music          
Date & Time: 09/05/90 10:05:30
Message Number  8554

I love David Sanborn's "real" music - the things he can do with that sax
But, I agree with you 100% - I have been real disappointed in the last 
year or so!
===========

From: SNAKEBYTE           
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Animalism!     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 12:17:40
Message Number  8555

But my friendly Unicorn...where would you of gone? I know if you let a
child feel they made the decision to do something (wheither or not they
freely decided) they really get involved in what they're doing. It's
just like the commercial "Don't let them know it good for them." Maybe
we should make high grades illegal or something, then kids might get 
them just to be "cool" or something....<grin>
===========

From: SNAKEBYTE           
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Wilmington     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 12:21:33
Message Number  8556

Sounds great!!!! Let's say we meet at the south end of Oleander Blvd 
this Saturday around 6am to get an early start <grin>. Man oh man what
times they was......why aren't they like that here???....oh well
===========

From: YNGLING             
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/05/90 15:17:52
Message Number  8558

>I vote in favor (strongly!) on your behalf...
*sniff* I want to thank everyone responsible for bestowing this great
honor upon me and I promise to do my best not to let any of you down.
And in the spirit of my new position, I'd just like to say:
  Set 'em up, bartender! :)
                                 The Yngling
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: BEATLE              
Subject: The Band       
Date & Time: 09/05/90 16:53:40
Message Number  8560

And, as an added bonus, I have a biohazard symbol which we can scan in
at 300 dpi, port over to Page Maker, add some lettering, and make a
real big poster.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: BEATLE              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 16:54:44
Message Number  8561

>You don't seem too enthusiastic about this.
>Do you really think these rug-rats are going to take to you, though?
 
Ohh, I'm not worried about rug-rats anymore.  A few warning shots and
they usually leave me alone.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Wyverns Den    
Date & Time: 09/05/90 16:57:49
Message Number  8562

>So, like, when will Xon answer OMNI?
 
Ya know what ticks me off?  When OMNI sends me 16 letters saying "This
is your last chance to renew at these really low, low prices."
 
 ...oh, you mean the character on the story board.  Oops..
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: THRUD               
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/05/90 16:59:40
Message Number  8563

>But how many times do you watch a video to catch a cleavage shot?
>Answer - as many times as it takes.
 
Or get a really good VCR and play it frame by frame.  And Hitachi has 
out this thing that will print color pictures of the TV screen.  To 
bad the resolution is really bad, and it's $800.
===========

From: THRUD               
To: BIG LEW             
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 18:23:43
Message Number  8565

Sounds like Yngling's designated drinker table might be more fun than
their jam. Pass the pitcher, and flag down that wench.
                             Thrud
===========

From: THRUD               
To: SNAKEBYTE           
Subject: Animalism!     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 18:25:34
Message Number  8566

Gawd, I've tried to convince my daughter that high grades are cool!
She gripes because all her friends are in one group, and she's stuck
with the uncool ones - in a faster track. Tough to convince a kid
that there are reasons for school besides socializing....durn, I 
figured it out by the time I was 26.....
                                      Thrud
===========

From: THRUD               
To: RUFUS               
Subject: omni           
Date & Time: 09/05/90 18:30:27
Message Number  8567

......and they tell ya your subscriptions about to run out whe
oops...when you have nine months left on it. What really slays me
is a notice I got from PC Computing 4 months before my sub ran out,
stating that if I didn't renew NOW, I'd probly miss an issue because
they couldn't print address labels in time! Doncha think somebody
in the editorial dept would tell the folks in the sub dept that the
PC Computing readerbase might see thru that? Even if we are a bunch
of dirty low down rotten MS-DOS users.
                                       THRUD
===========

From: THRUD               
To: RUFUS               
Subject: inane lyrics   
Date & Time: 09/05/90 18:35:40
Message Number  8568

ya, pause feature on my VCR makes the picture much to fuzzy....next
time I'll instruct my mother to spend much more on my Christmas
present.
===========

From: THRUD               
To: ALL                 
Subject: spouses (spice?
Date & Time: 09/05/90 18:38:45
Message Number  8569

Do yall catch a lot of grief over the time ya spend on the boards?
When I got started, it was "Shush, dads busy" or "Honey, I hate to
bug ya...." But lately they act like I'm sittin here doing nothing.
Jeez, I hate to tie up the line while my wife tells me about what
some dizzo did at the bank, but I can't tell her to shut up, but I
really want to Read&Post, but.....do yuz know what I mean? I've cut
down a lot....don't play any games, just do the message thing.....
I think my wife is jealous of my computer....
                              Thrud
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: YNGLING             
Subject: Laws of...     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 19:04:08
Message Number  8570

>I think you're intelligent enough to understand the social and
>economic upheaval that would be experienced WORLDWIDE if any one
>man/government gained control of such a large portion of the World's
>oil supply.
      
    Thanks. But, I'm noticing that no other nation in the world is
as firmly entrenched in this battle than the U.S. Do they know something
we don't?
                 Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: BEATLE              
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 19:11:10
Message Number  8571

>Do you really think these rug-rats are going to take to you, though?
      
    Ya never know. Even O.E.M. (the very alternate band I've belonged
to...) had its fan club. (Once met one of the members of it outside the
band. He didn't recognize me, but he told me about this "really neat
band at the Main Street Book Shop." I recognized him. <Sigh!> For the
days of O.E.M., where three's a crowd, and four's an audience.)
                     Chip P. Unicorn
     
I can imagine Rufus taking a liking to one of them, and showing it off
to his parents: "He followed me home. Can I keep him?"
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Really?        
Date & Time: 09/05/90 19:15:43
Message Number  8572

>Have fun learning Japanese.
       
      !       /  \         !
    ----       - !       -----
   /  /  -       !         !
  ----   -      //        / \
      
                  Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: SNAKEBYTE           
Subject: Animalism!     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 19:21:19
Message Number  8574

>Maybe we should make high grades illegal or something, then kids might
>get them just to be "cool" or something... <grin>
     
    I can imagine the psychology now.
    
    Mother: Didn't we bring you up right? What did we do wrong?
    Father: It's not as if we ask for much.
    Mother: And don't you love us?
    Child:  Well, yes but --
    Mother: <interrupting> Then act like it! Show us some respect.
    Father: It's not just the report card.
    Mother: Although that could use some help...
    Father: I'm glad to see you at least made a 'C' in history.
    Mother: But four A's and two B's?!?
    Child: Well, I guess...
    Father: But what really gets me is your rebellion.
    Mother: Acting nice to your sister! Cleaning up after yourself!
            Why when I was a child, I tied my sister to the hot water
            heater at least once a month!
    Father: Calm down. Now, Jeder, it's not the music you listen to.
    Mother: Those hideous groups! With such strange names and
            instruments! Bach! Tschicovsky! John Cage!
    Father: Well, you know you could listen to something a bit more,
            ummm... modern.
    Child:  But I don't like...
    Mother: You don't like?!? You don't like?!? That's just like you!
            All you think about is yourself! You never think of others!
     
    <ad nausium>
                      Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: THRUD               
Subject: spouses (spice?
Date & Time: 09/05/90 19:33:08
Message Number  8575

>I think my wife is jealous of my computer.
     
   Computer modeming is an addiction. (Hell -- if it's good enough for
a defense attorney to win a case, it's sure good enough for here!)
<This is your brain. This is your brain playing with modems. Now,
this is your brain playing with modems with a side of bacon.>
     
   It's a good way for introverts (like many of us are) to hide behind
our screens -- and yet meet people. But -- real flesh and bones is
better. Spend more time with your wife -- or, like I did with my
filly, get her addicted as well. (Tell her it won't show up in any
blood sample.)
                    Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: RAVEN               
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: spouses (spice?
Date & Time: 09/05/90 20:16:45
Message Number  8576

>-- or, like I did with my filly, get her addicted as well. (Tell her it
>won't show up in any blood sample.)
 
Or keep handing her information, gifs, . . . etc. so that she gets
something useful out of that time.  (also get a second line).  Sure you
still get griped at, but not as often, and not as much.
 
                  -R-
 
(and you don't feel as guilty about it)
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 20:50:13
Message Number  8579

>Not Babbage's machine. Turings.
 
Yes, you got me. I goofed. The Difference Engine was Turing's; I should
/know/ that. Now I feel dumb...
 
...but hey, I bet Bo doesn't know his computer pioneers!
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: MAX                 
Subject: CD's           
Date & Time: 09/05/90 20:52:29
Message Number  8580

I agree that CD's offer the best currently available sound reproduction
under real-world conditions; I was simply pointing out that not only are
they not perfect, by today's standards of digital recording they're not
that good. If the media were being developed today, I suspect we'd end
up with something about on par with current CD technology pricewise,
with significantly better sound reproduction and higher resolution. Un-
fortunately, 'tain't gonna happen what with all the market support
already lined up behind the CD. (This whole conversation got started as
a result of Beatle's question, "You mean there really is better-than-CD-
quality technology?" The answer is, Yes, there is.)
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Rules of..     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 20:57:54
Message Number  8581

>Bash homos! Bash homos!
 
I agree. That homogenized milk, nasty stuff. If Nature intended for milk
to be homogenized, cows'd have attachments for paint shakers.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/05/90 20:58:52
Message Number  8582

>Can you play? Yes, or no...can you play?
 
Well..a reserved yes'd be in order. The reservations are: I've never
played with a group before--t'was always just by meself--and I haven't
done it in a number of years, and therefore have no idea as to whether
that's the type of knowin' what sticks with you fer a long time.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 21:10:51
Message Number  8585

>Even O.E.M...had its fan club.
 
But they weren't very good at it--both of 'em had to be home by 9.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: THRUD               
Subject: Co-habitators  
Date & Time: 09/05/90 21:22:17
Message Number  8586

Yup... I know what you mean!  I got rid of mine because she wouldn't 
let me get on the boards as much as I wanted.  Selfish?  You bet your
ass!  Listening to her bitch wasn't worth it!  So...
  
SSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYA!!
  
  "Heartless Asshole" and "I Wish You'd Pay More Attention to Me" are
trademarks of Typical Women, Inc.  Any use here is in thier most common
sense.  Patent Pending.
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Rules of..     
Date & Time: 09/05/90 21:30:22
Message Number  8587

Dammit, I said STOP THAT!!!
===========

From: THE SPECIALIST      
To: JONBOY              
Subject: Drummer        
Date & Time: 09/05/90 21:32:39
Message Number  8588

I think we have got ourselves a drummer...now if we can just lure 
a Turtle from it's shell...
  
  Perhaps you should hold auditions.  You have several guitar players
to choose from, a couple of drummers, a pair of kinda-keyboardists,
and even a clarinet player!  What do you think?
===========

From: ANTIC FREDDY        
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: The Band (JB&B)
Date & Time: 09/05/90 22:06:41
Message Number  8589

    Do i know him???
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: RUFUS               
Subject: dog house?     
Date & Time: 09/06/90 02:33:16
Message Number  8597

Don't your warning shots usually include removing a limb? Personally, I
prefer to warn them away with a toddler-head on a stick. It serves as an
example of what will happen if they get too close.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: THRUD               
Subject: spouses (spice?
Date & Time: 09/06/90 02:36:46
Message Number  8598

Just tell her that it's only a fling and that she's one you REALLY love.
I'm sure that the female logic circuits will override her desire to beat
the crap out of you after you tell her that.
===========

From: ZOT GNOP            
To: THE SPECIALIST      
Subject: Drummer        
Date & Time: 09/06/90 02:42:19
Message Number  8599

I say we use everybody. Just think of the impact of 4 rythm guitarists 
two lead guitarists, two drummers, two keyboardists, a clarinet, a kazoo
and a mouth harp all goin' at once. We could call our first album 
"Entropy" or "Chaos Dogs from Hell's Off Ramp"
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Really?        
Date & Time: 09/06/90 14:23:09
Message Number  8600

 Konichiwa-Chip-san. Japanese is not that hard to learn, written or 
spoken. I've already started to learn......Hmmm--does this mean I'm a 
natural born business-man?
===========

