FILE ON
MARGIN IS 76 
STATUS: ALL ALLOWED
NUMBER OF LINES: 629 
1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask....
2 ********************** REMOVED: 24 DEC 83 ******************************
3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System)  Mike Day System operator
4 ************************************************************
5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION PLACED ON
6                     THIS SYSTEM.
7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned
8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public.
9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system.
10 It is intended that the system be normally used for messages and
11 advertisments by the users. As the system is privately owned, I retain the
12 right to remove any and all messages which I may find offensive
13 to me. Additionally because of the limited size of the system, it will be
14 periodically purged of older messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved)
15 The saved information will be cycled to drive 'B' while the information on
16 drive 'B' will be archived, and a fresh disk will be installed in drive 'A'.
17 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out
18 of the enter mode. The message is automaticly stored.
19 If after entering the message you find you made a mistake,
20 use the replace command to replace the line.
21 To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up.
22 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
23 ========================================
24 
25 DARN PESKY INJUNS! THEY DON'T EVEN DRINK TEA!
26 =============================================
27 ARE WE HERE AGAIN CLYDE?
28 I TOLD YOU I WANTED THE 4TH DIMENSION. THIS MUST BE THE THIRD!!!
29 LOOK AT HOW WIERD THESE PEOPLE ARE.
30 AND LOOK AT THAT...SOMETHING
31 ABOUT 'INJUNS' THIS IS WIERD. GET ME OUT OF HERE CLYDE
32 
33 Yes, Clyde, and teach him how to spell "weird" while you are at it.
34 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
35                  SOMEONE LEAVE ME A NOTE PLEASE...IF THERE IS 
36    ANYONE OUT THERE.......
37                                 BOBBY.
38 \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
41 +%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%%#%#%#%#%           
42 BOBBY- HI, I AM JODY. I HAVE BEEN GONE FROM THIS SSTEM FOR A WHILE BUT AM 
43 BACK NOW I SUPOSE I WILL STICK AROUND FOR A WHILE. WELL, HOW DO YOU LIKE
44 THE INN SO FAR?    
45 
46 ALL- WHERE'S DOM? STILL GONE?
47 
48 #%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%##%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#
49 
50 YOU EVER NOTICE HOW ON ALL THE CEREAL COMMERCIALS THEY CLAIM THEIR
51 RAISONS ARE "~'PLUMP AND JUICY'? IF THIS WAS TRUE, THEY WOULDN'T BE RAISONS
52 THEY WOULD BE GRAPES AGAIN! WHY IS THIS THAT THEY THINK WE LIKE GRAPES
53 INSTEAD OF RAISONS?
54     I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW.
55              Andy Roony
56 hello my name is jim, this is the first time i have been on your system, tha
57 exit
58 break
62 help
63 goodby
64 off
65 exit
66 bye
67 HI JIM! THIS IS LOTS OF FUN. STICK AROUND AND I THINK YOU WILL SEE WHAT I ME
68 AN,~. YOU CAN LEAVE ALL KINDS OF STUFF. THE ONLY PROBLEM IS,
69 SOMETIMES IT IS HARD TO FIND THINGS.
70 
71 ###############################################################
72 
73 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
74 *  IMAGINATION ALERT        *
75 * * * * * * * * *            * * * * * * * *
76                 * FI GDM - TO NEXT MESSAGE *
77                 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
78 
79 
80 **************************************************************
81 ******                                                  ******
82 ****                                                      ****
83 **                    INSIDE BACKWATER                      **
84 *                    (The Untold Story                       *
85 
86 
87 A number of recent messages from newcomers showed an interest 
88 in learning more about what Backwater Messages is all about. 
89 Though relatively new myself I've picked up enough information 
90 to give a fair idea of what's going on. I'll leave it to the 
91 oldtimers to jump in and correct any factual errors I might 
92 make.
93 
94 It is a fascinating story that begins in the middle east. For 
95 many years Syria's President Hafez Assad wasn't concerned 
96 about having a strong intelligence presence in the United 
97 States. However, with he growing American presence in Lebanon 
98 he grew alarmed at his inablity to get solid intelligence 
99 about the west.
100 
101 He decided he needed a network of agents familiar enough 
102 with western mores and cultural values to make sense of 
103 the psychology of American Imperialism. To train his new 
104 agents he turned to an independent American arms dealer who 
105 who dealt in computer equipment on the side. Between the two 
106 of them they set up the network you are now monitoring.
107 
108 Across America there are 165 computer bullitin boards 
109 similar to Backwater Messages that are used for the training 
110 of Syrian Agents. Up to 80% of participants of systems like 
111 Backwater are Americans. The remaining 20% are "characters" 
112 controlled by Syrian agents, who in turn are controlled by 
113 Soviet psychologists trained in high tech foriegn espionage. 
114 
115 Each Syrian spy has four characters, each with a different 
116 personality, that he manipulates to learn American response 
117 patterns. Each agent is controled by a Psychologist who 
118 supervises all entries and monitors all American reactions.
119 
120 In following Backwater Messages it can be difficult to tell 
121 the Americans from the Syrians.
122 
123 Here are some tips:
124 
125        1) Because Syria has a limited number of 
126        educated people they must recruit agents 
127        from the aristocracy. Consequently, Syrian
128        agents are often arrogant and rude...though 
129        not always.
130 
131        2) Syrian agents can sometimes be spotted 
132        by their limited sense of humor and abhorance
133        of anything imaginative.
134 
135        3) Syrian Agents can not speak Pig Latin
136 
137 
138 I hope this information has been helpful to those of you who 
139 are new. If you have any further questions feel free to ask.
140 
141 
142 
143                          GRAND DRAGON MASTER
144 
145 *                                                             *
146 **                                                           **
147 ****                                                       ****
148 ******                                                   ******
149 ***************************************************************
150 GDM - You are welcome...just trying to be nice. 
151 ***************************************************************
152 YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING.
153 WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THIS RUBBISH?
154 I HAVE BEEN CONNECTED WITH THE RUUSIAN KGB AND WE GOT NO NEWS OF THIS
155 INVOLB~VEMENT IN AMERICAN MATERS~~~TERS. I CAN ASSURE YOU ALL, WE HAVE NO
156 INTENTIONS OF INVADING YOUR PRIVACY. YOUR PRESIDENTS~'S PRIVACY IS ANOTHER
157 MATTER. THE SYRIANS HAVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS. THEY GO AROUND WITH TOWELS
158 ON THER~IR HEADS ALL DAY.
159 WE APPRECIATE YOUR EASY ACCESS AND ANY MILITARY SECRECTS YOU CARE TO
160 SHARE WILL BE WELCOME.
161 
162          I.M. RED    -RUSSIAN KGB
163 OFF
164 
165 
166 ***************************************************************
167 
168       Meryln:
169 
170             Walt Disney called and wanted to know
171         when you're going to show us your imagination.
172         He cancelled two meetings with Donald Duck so
173         he would be available to monitor your stuff. I
174         don't know if I can keep him interested much 
178         longer.
179 
180 
181                            Grand D.
182 
183 **************************************************************
184        ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
185                       ARGHH!    
186 
187 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
188 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
189 WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE HAVE NO IMAGINATION OR SENSE OF HUMOR;
190 YOU RUNNING IMPERIALIST DOG!
191                                    MOHAMMED WASSIR
192 P.S. THIS IS AN ALBANIAN NET NOT A SYRIAN ONE!
193 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
194 Long live Jimmy Hoffa...<glub> <glub>
195 
196 SAY BROS! WHAT'S HAPPININ' MAN. STAY KOOL BLOOD STAY KOOL. THIS BE A BROTHER
197 I SAID THIS BE A BROTHER'S NET. NOW DON'T NONW~E OF YOU COMMIES COME
198 STEPPIN' THROUGH HERE AND MESS IT UP YA HERE?
199  STAY LK~~KOOL BROS.
200             WE BE STEPPIN' ON.
201                 PRIMEMINISTER
202 **************************************************************************
203 
204 I FEEL MORE LIKE I DO NOW THAN BEFORE I CAME!
205 
206                     R.F.
207 
208 **************************************************************************
209                                                                             
210 
211 
212  DID YOU EVER NOTICE HOW IN THE CARTOONS, WHEN THE CHARACTERS FALL OFF A  ~CLIFF HOW THEY HANG FOR A WILE BEFORE THEY FALL?
213 WHY IS THIS ? COULD IT BE THAT THEY ARE LIGHTER THAN US? WHY CAN'T WE DO THIS TOO?
214 MAYBE IT IS A RUSSIAN SECRET THAT NEEDS LOOKING INTO.
215 IT BOTHERS ME. I WOULD LIKE T ~O KNOW  ~WHY WE CAN'T DO THAT.
216   
217  
218              Andy Roony
219 
220 **************************************************************
221 
222             Andy:
223 
224                Cartoon characters are not lighter
225             than humans. The floating in air phenomonon 
226             is created by the scientific fact that 
227             cartoon environments are heavier. 
228 
229                               Mickey
230 
231 **************************************************************
233 HEY.... LIKE THAT'S REAL HEAVY MAN!........
234 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
235      well, so far you people have done nothing to impress me. 
236 Don't bother reponding to that coment because I will never read it. This is the first and last time I ever come here again.
237 
238 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::mucked up:::::::::::::: :::::::::::::::::
239 
240 WELL NOW!
241 
242 FIRST OF ALL I NOTICE HOW THE LAST TEN MESSAGES OR SO HAVE BEEN SPRINKLED
243 EVERY OTHER MESSAGE OR SO BY A LITTLE FUNNY MARK LIKE THE ONE MY MODEM
244 MAKES WHEN THE CARRIER BREAKS. ON SOME KEYBOARDS THIS IS THE CHARACTER
245 FOR 'APPROXIMATELY'. FROM THE WAY THEY APPEARED, I GUESS THAT IS THE 
246 MARK SOMEBODIES TERMINAL MAKES WHEN THEY TRY TO ERASE SOMETHING, AND THEY
247 ARE NOT AWARE THAT THE TEXT IS NOT BEING ERASED. THIS  MEANS THAT ALL OF
248 THOSE MESSAGES MAY HAVE BEEN LEFT BY THE SAME PERSON. ALSO I NOTE THAT
249 NATASHA, BIG BILL BROOZY AND SO ON HAVE DISSAPPEARED (MUCH TO OUR DISMAY,
250 I'M SURE)(I LIKED 'EM ANYWAY) BUT THAT THE GRAND DRAGONMASTER MAKES
251 LITTLE BOXES AND THINGS JUST LIKE BIG BILLS BOXES. 
252 
253 SO I THINK WE HAVE HERE MAYBE TWO PEOPLE TALKING THROUGH TEN CHARACTERS
254 EACH, OR MAYBE JUST ONE BODY WITH TWENTY PERSONALITIES WHO ONLY GET
255 TOGETHER HERE ON BWMS.
256 
257 IF THERE REALLY IS JUST ONE PERSON AND TWENTY PERSONALITIES, IT FIGURES
258 THAT THE PERSON IN QUESTION IS ACCUSING THE REST OF US OF BEING MESSED
259 UP. PEOPLE USUALLY THINK THE OTHER PERSON IS MESSED UP, NO MATTER WHAT.
260 PEOPLE DON'T SEEM TO CHANGE MUCH, EVEN IF THEY SUFFER FROM
261 DODECAPERSONALITONIA (GIVEN BY MY DICTIONARY AS 'HAVING EITHER
262 TWENTY OR TWELVE PERSONALITIES, DEPENDING ON HOW YOU LOOK AT IT')
263 
264 WHAT REALLY UPSETS ME IS BEING MADE A DUPE BY THE SYRIANS. I AM SURE THEY
265 PLANTED THE NOTICE FROM THE 'ALBANIANS'. I AM SO UPSET THAT I AM GOING 
266 TO WRITE A LETTER TO THE SYRIAN AMBASSADOR IN PROTEST, IN FACT. IN 
267 MY LETTER I WILL GIVE THE AMBASSADOR A GOOD TONGUE LASHING. THAT
268 WILL CERTAINLY SHOW HIM.
269 
270 WHICH WAY DID THEY GO, GEORGE? WHICH WAY DID THEY GO?
271 
272 AN INTELLIGENT PERSON MAY SHOW A DISPOSITION TO GIVE ANY IDEA A FAIR TRIAL,
273 CONSIDERING EVEN THE MOST REDICULOUS IDEA IN DETAIL BEFORE REJECTING
274 IT. THIS IS KNOWN AS BEING OPEN MINDED.
275 
276 A CROCKER SPANIEL CAN BE VERY OPEN MINDED AND INTELLIGENT, I THINK.
277 AT LEAST, WHENEVER I DISCUSS THE SOUND OF ONE HAND CLAPPING WITH MY 
278 CROCKER SPANIEL, OR REQUIRE HIM TO CONSIDER SOME OF MERLYN'S IDEAS
279 ABOUT PHILOSOPHY AND MEANINGFUL DISCOURSE, MY CROCKER SPANIEL LOOKS
280 VERY INTELLIGENT INDEED. 
281 
282 HE NEVER REJECTS AN IDEA OUT OF HAND, OR WALKS AWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF
283 A RANT I AM GIVING. HE APPEARS TO HANG ON EACH AND EVERY WORD I 
284 AM SAYING, GIVING ME A VERY THOUGHTFUL, EVEN YOU MIGHT SAY A
285 VERY PERPLEXED LOOK. AFTER I AM DONE, HE GOES OVER TO HIS FAVORITE RUG
286 TO SIT AND THINK ABOUT IT ALL. SOMETIMES HE CAN REALLY THINK UP A 
287 STORM. WHEN HE REALLY THINKS HARD HE DOESN'T MOVE AT ALL FOR
288 LONG PERIODS OF TIME, EXCEPT TO SCRATCH AND TAKE A LOT OF THOSE DEEP
289 DOGGY BREATHS THAT THEY TAKE WHEN THEY ARE LAYING ON THERE SIDES 
290 WITH THEIR TONGUES HANGING OUT LIKE BIG PINK SLUGS.
291 
292 MY DOGGIE IS AT THE VETRINARIANS NOW. HE WAS THINKING OVER SOME OF 
293 THAT HEAVY ZEN-TYPE STUFF I LAID ON HIM LIKE "EVERYTHING I TELL YOU
294 IS A LIE" THAT I GOT FROM MERLYN. AFTER A WHILE HE WAS THINKING 
295 REALLY HARD AND I NOTICED HE WAS REALLY QUIET. 
296 
297 OH,OH, I THOUGHT. TO MUCH SATORI, OR SOMETHING. 
298 
299 THE VET SAYS HE IS IN A COMA. PRETTY SOON I WILL HAVE TO DECIDE ON
300 WHETHER TO PULL THE PLUG ON ALL THOSE RESPIRATORS, PLASMA DRIPS, AND
301 OTHER THINGS THAT ARE KEEPING HIM GOING. I AM HOPING I WON'T HAVE TO GO
302 BEFORE THE SUPREME COURT OR THE ASPCA OR THE ANTI-VIVISECTION LEAGUE
303 OR SOME GROUP OF WELL MEANING SOLONS LIKE THAT.
304 
305 ANYWAY, I THOUGHT I HAD BETTER CALL UP AND WARN YOU ALL BEFORE IT'S
306 TOO LATE. THERE APPEARS TO BE A DRAWBACK TO BEING A LITTLE TOO OPEN 
307 MINDED. I HAVE A FEW SUGGESTIONS.
308 
309 1) IF YOU RUN INTO THE PHRASE "THINK ABOUT IT", DON'T.
310 
311 2) IF YOU READ THE PHRASE "I HATE TO TELL YOU THIS, BUT...", DON'T
312    LET THEM TELL YOU. THEY'LL FEEL BETTER, TOO.
313 
314 3) FINALLY, IF SOMEONE DECIDES YOU'RE TOO DUMB TO TALK TO ANY MORE,
315    DON'T TRY TO TALK THEM OUT OF QUITTING. MAYBE YOU ARE TOO DUMB.
316    IF SO, YOU COULD END UP LIKE MY DOGGIE. I OFTEN THOUGHT THAT HE
317    MIGHT BE TOO DUMB TO EXPLAIN ALL OF THIS HEAVY STUFF TO, BUT I
318    DIDN'T HAVE THE HEART TO BE HONEST WITH HIM ABOUT IT, HONEST LIKE
319    SOME PEOPLE ARE WITH ME. AND JUST LOOK WHAT HAPPENED. 
320 
321 I FEEL SO ASHAMED.
322 
323 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HROTHGAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
324 THIS IS ANDY, THANKS FOER THE INFO ON THE CARTOON SETS, I NEVER
325 WOULD HAVE GUESSED. JUST NOW THOUGH, I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING.
326 DID YOU EVER NOTICE HOW WHEN YOU THING~K ABOUT YOUR TOES
327 INSIDE OF YOUR SHOES THAT YOU END UP GETTING IN FRENZY TRI~YING TO GET
328 YOUR TOES OUT. IT IS LIKE THEY WERE TRAPPED AGAINST THEIR WILL IN
329 YOUR SHOES. WHY IS THIS? I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW.
330 DO YOU EVER NOTICE ALL THOSE LITTLE FUZZ BALLS ON YOUR GOOD DRESS SOCKS?
331 WHERE DO THEY COME FROM? THEY CAN'T COME FROM THE MATERIAL
332 OR THEY WOULD BE ON THE INSIDE TOO. THIS IS HARS~D FOR
333 ME TO COMPREHEND.
334 
335 
336                Andy Roony
337 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
338 is it just my imagination or does there seem to be a lot of garbage on this 
339 board???
340 20
341 GUYS. GUYS. GUYS. DON'T GET IN A HUFF OVER IT. THIS IS THE ONLY
342 FUN BULLITIN BOARD AROUND. ALL THE OTHER ONES HAVE ALL THOSE COMMANDS TO
343 REMEMBER AND STUFF. THIS ONE YOU CAN JUST DROP IN AND GET CRAZY.
344 I HOPE THE SYSOP READ ~S THIS TOO. AS LONG AS THE BOARD SERVES THAT
345 PURPOSE OR ANY OTHER PURPOSE IT IS WORTH WI~HILE. LETS NOT HAVE A FIT 
346 ABOUT IT. JUST I~ENJOY IT FOR WHAT IT IS.
347 
348                 NOT CONCERNED
349 
350 **************************************************************
351 HROTHGAR: AS I REMEMBER, THE '~' IS A BACKSPACE ON THE ATARI.
352 AS PER YOUR REQUEST ALA 'REASON'. I SUBSCRIBE TO IT, SO UNLESS
353 RICH'S CAN'T GET IT FOR YOU, ABOUT ALL I COULD SUGGEST IS TO 
354 SUBSCRIBE TO IT TOO. THE ADDRESS IS:  REASON, 
355 SAN DIEGO, CA 93103 (714) 485-xxxx. IF YOU CALL, MAYBE THEY
356 WILL SEND YOU A SAMPLE ISSUE. REASON IS A NON-PROFIT ORGINIZATION.
357 AS YOU CAN PROBABLY WELL IMAGINE THEY SPEND A RATHER LARGE
358 AMOUNT OF TIME FIGHTING WITH UNCLE TO KEEP IT AS IT SEEMS THAT
359 UNCLE DOESN'T LIKE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ALL THE NASTY THINGS HE'S
360 DONE AND OR IS DOING, SO HE KEEPS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A WAY TO
361 REVOLK THE NP STATUS. AS I REMEMBER THE SUB RATE IS $15 WITH A
362 PER ISSUE COST OF $2. OH YES, IF YOU DO SUBSCRIBE YOU WILL FIND
363 YOUR NAME ON EVERY LIBITARIAN MAILING LIST IN THE COUNTRY, BUT,
364 EVEN THAT CAN BE INTERESTING AS YOU CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT THE
365 LIBITARIAN VIEW POINT. OF COURSE GIVEN THE VARIED PAST YOU DESCRIBE,
366 I WOULDN'T BE SUPRISED IF YOUR NAME HAS FOUND ITS WAY TO ONE OF 
367 THE LISTS ANYWAY, YOU SEEM TO GO FOR A LOT OF UNUSUAL READING!
368 BY THE WAY, MY FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH THE 'GOVERNMENTS VERSION
369 OF THE TRUTH' WAS WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL WRITING A TERM PAPE
370 ON THE PUEBLO CRISIS. I USED RADIO HAVANA AS A ALTERNATE SOURCE
371 OF INFORMATION TO FIND OUT WHAT THE OTHER SIDE WAS SAYING. MY
372 TEACHER WAS IMPRESSED AND GAVE ME A B- DESPITE THAT THE PAPER
373 WAS BARELY WORTH A 'C' IN REALITY, HE GAVE ME THE EXTRA FOR
374 USING MY IMAGINATION AND EXPLORING REAL ALTERNATE POINTS OF VIEW
375 INSTEAD OF JUST GOING TO THE LIBRARY AND COPYING WHAT SOMEONE ELSE
376 WROTE. EVER SINCE THEN I'VE ALWAYS TAKEN THE 'OFFICAL WORD' WITH
377 A BIT OF SCEPTICISIM.
378 OH YES, THE '~' IS CALLED A TILDA IN CASE YOU WANTED TO KNOW.
379 ***************************************************************
380 P.S. PAM? HAVE YOU GONE SILENT ON US AGAIN? I WOULD HAVE HOPED THAT
381 YOU WOULD JOIN INTO THE FRAY! SPEAK UP! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! 
382 HELLO PAM? ARE YOU THERE PAM? HELLO? HELLO? DARN, MUST HAVE HUNG UP.
383 *****************************************************************
384 P.P.S. d. YOUR PRESENCE IS NOTED. AND ACCEPTANCE GRANTED. MUST CATCH
385 THESE TIMES ON BWMS BETWEEN OTHER WORK.
386 *******************************************************************:
387 P.P.P.S. HAVE I MISSED ANYONE ELSE? OH YES, THE STANDARD BY NOW
388 WHAT HAPPENED TO DOM? PLEA. WHERE'S DOM?? 
389 ********************************************************************
390 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
391 MR. ROONEY <You Capitalist Lackey>
392 HERE'S ANOTHER DEEP PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION FOR YOU:
393                      WHY IS THERE AIR?
394 THIS QUESTION WAS POSED BY THE FAMOUS 20th CENTURY STOIC PHILOSOPHER,
395 WILLIAM COSBY (Another Imperialist Running Dog).  THAT ONE WILL KEEP
396 YOU AWAKE NIGHTS FOR A LONG TIME TO COME
397                                      MOHAMMED WASSIR
398                                      <The Albanian Firebrand>
399 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
400 
401 *******************************FI GDM-NEXT MESSAGE*************
402 
403 HROTHGAR:
404 
405 I was flattered that you took the time to speculate about my 
406 characters. You were partly correct. I do not have hundreds of 
407 characters. I have only four, Grand Dragonmaster, Natasha, Big 
408 Bill Broozy, and LeRoy McKane. Occassionally I'll leave an 
409 unnamed message if I feel it might help the flow.
410 
411 I'm glad you enjoyed Natasha and Big Bill...that seems to make 
412 two of us.
413 
414 LeRoy was my first character. He was the one I used to try to 
415 figure out what was, and was not, appropriate for this board. 
416 I retired him because he kept drawing too much flack. I guess 
417 he taught me what not to do.
418 
419 When I got real tired of LeRoy's bickering I introduced the 
420 GRAND DRAGON MASTER as a peaceful alternative. The Grand D. is 
421 my attempt to create a character that is a "gentleman". The 
422 dragon master aspires to avoid nastiness and concentrate on 
423 having fun.
424 
425 I am hoping to find kindred spirits among the members of the 
426 Inn who can share my delight in imagination. Some days are 
427 more discouraging than others.
428 
429 Sorry to hear about your dog. When that happened to my dog I 
430 took care of it by reading to him from "China Reconstructs". 
431 It worked wonders for his health but he now barks with an 
432 oriental accent.
433 
434                       GRAND DRAGON MASTER
435 
436 
438 ==============================
439 
440 
441 
442        Andy:
443 
444            External sock fuzz balls are created when 
445        toes, attempting to excape from shoes, scrape 
446        inside sock material. The reason the balls are
447        not on the inside is because you have your socks 
448        on inside-out.
449 
450 
451             Don't tell the Albanian Firebrand that I told 
452        you this, but the answer to his question is...
453         "To blow up basket balls". 
454 
455 
456                         Grand D.
457 
458 *************************************************************
459 GDM *********************************************************
460 Hrothgar:I have just remembered an interesting item in a letter from
461 someone living in Switzerland (member of club I belong to). They said that 
462 in Switzerland, indeed in most of Europe, you must pick your child's name 
463 from a list of approved names! Being Americans, they were exempt but it was 
464 mentioned to them when they had their kid a few months back. Considering the
465 name they gave their kid I _almost_ agree with the approved name list idea.
466 (They named him "Kodiak Starwolf Firesmith", Firesmith being their last 
467 name. Isn't that a TERRIBLE thing to saddle a kid with?)
468 ____________________________________Leonard_________________________________
469 <<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->>
470 Greetings and salutations.  I have noticed that this message
471 system can be easily described to my non-computer friends as
472 a long roll of toilet paper sitting on a table next to a
473 single pen.  Every so often someone comes along, scans back along
474 the roll, and reads until the end, then writes some additional
475 comment with the pen, then returns the roll back to its resting
476 place.  No significance to this comment... I just thought
477 that you might like to hear the metaphor in my mind about
478 this thing.  Today is an odd-numbered day, yet I have nothing
479 profound to say.  Why?  Must be because I was up too late
480 last nite.  So, I'll shuddup.  Sorry about your dog.  Dog's
481 already have zen, you don't need to give it to them.  FIrst
482 mistake.  (Or last, it's hard to tell.)  Definitely an
483 appropriate action, to try to clap one hand above a dog.  They
484 can't do it.  Puts 'em into shock, it does.  Then, their
485 poor little doggie mind gets blown.  Oh well, so much
486 for dogs.  Catch most of you later....
487 -- Merlyn (your favorite sign-off phrase here)
488 <<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->>
489 ~~~~~Now I know a good reason for long, long, very long school years~~~~
490 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~NO MINDLESS VACATIONERS!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
491 ~~~~MIKEY, MIKEY:  Save us from this:  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
492 ~~~~~~~~~~~DO NOT CHANGE THE DISK UNTIL EPIPHANY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
493 THIS IS ANDY AGAIN Y~THANKS FOR THE INFO ON THE SI~OCK BALL ~A~S I CHECKED A
494 ND INDEED I DO HAVE THEM ON IN-SIDE-OUT. I HAVE THOUGHT OVER THE AIR QUESTIO
495 N AND WILL GET BACK TO YOU ON IT.
496 HAVE YOU EVER NOTIV~CED HOW THE WORDS 'THICK AND RICH' ARE OVER USED?
497 HAS ANYBODY TASTED SHAMPOO TO SEE IF IT IS RICH? I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW.
498                 Andy Roony
499 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
500                          MONTANA SUNSHINE
501 
502      She sits upon my mantle
503      My little crystal-glass duck
504      Montana sunshine glitters
505      Iridescent rays upon her breast
506      And when she breaks wind
507      It shatters my mind
508                                    The Unknown Poet
509                            (doing a terrible Richard Brautigan impression)
510 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
511 Certainly an interesting metaphor, toilet paper. And it does apply to your
512 writing, Merlyn, since most of it seems to have been entered in the manner
513 that toilet paper is used. Your writing really wipes me out!
514 [(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)[(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)]
515 AS A GRE~AT AMERICAN, DAVID LETTERMAN, WOULD SAY,
516     HARD TO BELIEVE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HARD TO BELE>~~IEVE.
517      HOW~~~~WHY DO PEOPLE TYPE THEN ERASE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ALL THESE FOOL PROOF THINGS
518 HAVE ONE PROBLEM, THEY DON'T TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THE ENGINUITY OF FOOLS.
519 
520 
521 
522 REMEN~MBER ALL YOU LAST MINUTE SHP~OPPERS,
523 NO MATE~TER HOW HARD YOU LOOK FOR SOMETHING, AND PRICE COMPARE.~,
524 IT WILL GO ON SALE SOMEWHERE AFTER YOU HAVE BOUGHT IT.
525  
526                 -MURPHY
527    */*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*
528     HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM ED WHALEN AND CHANNEL 6.
529 HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO
530 
531 ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
532  WELL WELL WELL. SINCE I HAVE FOREVER RETIRED MY ALIAS AS MERLYN AND HAVE DONATED IT TO MY FRIEND AND COMPANION I HAVE BEEN 
533 SEARCHING FOR A NEW ALIAS. I HAVE FOUND ONE. YOU MAY ALL CALL ME
534 -MYRDDIN EMRYS. YOU MAY CALL ME BY BOTH OR EITHER ONE. IF YOU DO ANY RESEARCH (WHICH I DOUBT YOU'LL BOTHER) YOU MAY FIND SOM
535 THING FAIRLY INTERESTING ABOUT IT. 
536 
537 MERLYN- GREETS AND SALS TO YOU TOO. WILL CALL FRIDAY. IN THE MEANTIME HANG TIGHT AND STAY DRY. NO MORE TUBIN' TILL THE WEEKEND
538 (JUST A LITTLE MIND PLAY?)    
539 
540 ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''MYRDDIN EMRYS'''''''''''''
541 '''''''''''''''''''''''
542 
543 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
544   GRAND DRAGON MASTER, eh?  SOUNDS LIKE A TYPICAL BOURGEOIS TITLE...ANOTHER
545 CAPITALIST CUR, GIVING AWAY ALBANIAN STATE SECRETS.
546                                            MOHAMMED WASSIR
547                                        (The Albanian Firebrand)
548 P.S. THE MEN IN THE BLACK TRENCH COATS WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR SOON,
549 BUDDY!!!!
550 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
551 
552 Alex:  My roommate has a Swampscott Dory.  He had it made to order, so I think
553 it's the only one Schooner Creek made.  We sail mostly from the boat dock at
554 48th and Marine and from Rooster Rock.  No name on the boat.  We also spent
555 a week sailing in the San Juans last year.  Fantasic experience.  If you
556 haven't tried it, I'd highly recommend it.      DP
557 ******************************************************************************
558 Well friend i~I researched your Myrddin Emrys and I think I see what you mwean. I shall promid~se to keep your secret fromm~
559 all if that is what you wish. Your secret shall remain safe with me.
560          
561                  Hablu Kahn.
562 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
563                                        
564      HROTHGAR, YOU ARE QUITE CORRECT ABOUT THE POTENTIAL FOR EFFECT THIS
565 MEDIUM HAS, BUT I DON'T THINK THAT THIS INDIVIDUAL BBS HAS MUCH EFFECT BE-
566 YOND THE MINDS OF ITS USERS (AND IN SOME CASES, NOT EVEN THAT, AS THE NEW
567 GENERATION OF ECCENTRICS AND EGOMANIACS COMING TO THE INN DEMONSTRATES).
568      SO YOU WORKED FOR THE "UNDERGROUND" PRESS IN PORTLAND!  WAS IT THE IN-
569 FAMOUS WILLAMETTE BRIDGE?  I USED TO READ A NUMBER OF SUCH PUBLICATIONS
570 (SUCH AS THE BERKELEY BARB AND THE L.A. FREE PRESS) UNTIL THESE BECAME MERE
571 TRASH.  THE STATE OF "ALTERNATIVE" PRESS IN AMERICA IS PITIFUL, AS MOST SUCH
572 PAPERS HAVE DISSAPEARED (THANK YOU, AGNEW!).  I STILL READ MOTHER JONES,
573 THOUGH.  WERE YOU A "NATTERING NABOB OF NEGATIVISM"?
574      THOMAS PAINE, EH?  I WASN'T AWARE THAT ANYBODY READ HIM THESE DAYS!  HE
575 IS STILL VERY RADICAL, AND I'M NOT AT ALL SURPRISED THAT HIS WRITINGS ARE SO
576 HARD TO FIND.  HAVE YOU READ "COMMON SENSE" OR "ESSAYS ON THE RIGHTS OF MAN"?
577                                        
578      POPS, THANKS FOR THE COMPLIMENTS (TWICE, EVEN!)!  YES, PRAVDA CAN BE
579 VERY DULL, ESPECIALLY BY COMPARISON TO THE FLASH AND GLITTER OF AMERICAN
580 NEWS.  BUT IT'S NICE TO KNOW WHAT THE OTHER GUY IS SAYING, EVEN IF YOU DON'T
581 BELIEVE A WORD OF IT OTHER PEOPLE DO, AND YOU MUST BE PREPARED IF YOU WISH
582 TO ARGUE A POINT.
583                                        
584 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]PAM.[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
585 ^H     ?
586 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
587 ***************************************************************************
588    mickey 
589      Ever wonder why people get so
590 excited over right to death issues
591 with cooker spaniels without living
592 wills.
593      Do cats have to sign nine liv-
594 ing wills to terminate heroic life
595 suppport ? Should terminally ill
596 whales be intubated and put on Bear
597 ventilators ? Should bears?
598      Should people who are full of
599 questions and empty of answers be
600 hiven national TV exposure.
601 
602 ////////////////////////M.B.A.E.E./
603 //////////////////////////////////////^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
604 ......................................EXIT
605 
606 "HI HOW ARE YOU I'M HAVING A GOOD TIME "
607 *************************************************************************
608 IT MAY VERY WELL HAVE BEEN THAT THE COMPRESS COMMAND WAS IN ACTION, OR
609 MAYBE IT WAS THE TRUNCATE COMMAND? OR POSSIBLY THE MULTIPLE DELETE?
610 IT CERTAINLY WASN'T THE COPY COMMAND, NOR COULD IT HAVE BEEN THE CLEAR
611 ALL COMMAND. IT IS DOUBTFULL THAT IT WAS THE RECOVER COMMAND, OR THE 
612 INSERT COMMAND TOO. LOAD AND GO CERTAINLY WASN'T IN USE, AND PROTECT
613 COULDN'T HAVE BEEN USED. THE ERROR RECOVER AND SPEED CHANGE COMMANDS
614 COULDN'T HAVE BEEN IN USE EITHER, NOR COULD IT HAVE BEEN THE MULTIPLE
615 CHANGE OR COLUMNER CHANGE. SO THE ONLY THING IT COULD HAVE BEEN IS THE
616 COMPRESS I GUESS. HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO
617 ***************** CISTOP MIKEY *************************************
618 P.S. SEASONS GREATINGS
619 ******************************************************************
620 MIKEY:  Your spelling is "greating" on the nerves!  Repeat after me:
621   I, Mikey Day, being of willing mind and fingers, hereby resolve as
622     my one marvelous reform effort for 1984, and of course beyond, to
623     work my favorite dictionary to its very binding, and to persuade
624     my very fingers to follow the guidance thereof, until spelling
625     and typing on my own BWMS have become models for all who herein
626     venture.  So help me, Digital Research!
627 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
628 GOOD GRIEF!  ONLY 3 LINES LEFT!  WHAT'S A PERSON TO DO!  OH WELL, NEXT DISK!
629 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]PAM?[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

