
1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask...
2 ************************* INSTALLED: 29 JUL 85 **********************
3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System)  Mike Day System operator
4 ************************************************************
5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION
6                     PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM.
7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned
8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public.
9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is
10 privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which
11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be
12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved)
13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the
14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the
15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace
16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up.
17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
18 ************************************************************
19 
20 &*_#*%_@#)*%_@#)*!)_@*%!_)*%!@_)%!+@_(%+!@_*%)_!&!)_@(%!@_)%*_!)%!_)%)_!%_)%*!_)%*_!)%*_%*_!)#%*@_#%*@#_%@#%*@
21 Mikey: I have tests Wednesday and Thursday, so I wouldn't be able to pick up the new copylink disk until
22 Thursday night. If that suits you, fine. What are the changes in this new version? Still no luck on the VT100
23 stuff. When I get the new copy, I will go back over to Chuck's to test the jr again. I will 'custom' a COM2:
24 version before I go. I hope that is all it is...otherwise? Good job on the Tandy! I'll see if the school
25 district is interested in buying a copy (they have two Tandy's and the only software is Vidtex (yuch)).
26 Kosta: Nerd has the file? I haven't been able to get on today, bust busy busy. I bet those guys are fooling
27 around with the computer (as if I 
28 didn't know)
29 _Leonard_: Did you ever get that YMODEM file? Can you bring your fancy cable to the PCS pizza-feed on Thursday?
30 Voyeur: Three more disks for you: Just when you thought you had all your files sorted!
31 Mikey again: How many archive disks this time? Gee, I never got $$$ from all my cohorts last month...
32 I also have a couple questions about this AMODEM stuff, and before I forget, what is this LNW80.ASM file on here???
33 Doctor: Any clandestine meetings with 'classy' valedictorians in the works?
34 _*%#_@*%_@#*%_)#@&%^_)@#*%_)@#* L'homme sans parity - en haut de disque %%_)*%_%*_@#%)*@_)#%*@_)%*@_#)%*@#%@#%@%*@%
35 
36 ::: war haters in general, the point that war is bad, is given, so please do not make yourselves so redundant ::: finis
37 
38 
39 
40 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
41          NEOHAMA
42 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
43 
44 
45      Chapter 2
46        One Heck Of A Solution
47 
48 
49      As I was thinking about how to save my skin, I goot a heck of an idea.
50 If I could live in a spaceship, it would end my problems. All I had to do 
51 was design it to provide enough food and air to live on. 
52      But I had a massive problem. Without gravity, the food I was growing 
53 would float about. I can just see a cow 100 feet off the ground; or a plant
54 on the celing. How could I get artificial gravity?
55      I studied gravity and found out that nobody know why gravity exists.
56 Or even why it works. I was up all night thinking about it.
57 
58 
59 _<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<
60        NEOHAMA
61 _<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<
62       Hey all you c/64 users...
63 If ya want a ML program to plot one pixel on a bit mapped screen (8192 sa)
64 I've got one made. I know it's not much but if you want it, leave me a 
65 message. I'll print the PEEK's, Start & End adresses.
66          ltaer Neo
67 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
68 
69 don't mind me, I'm just going to hit the 'rewind' button for a minute...
70 kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta  kosta kosta kosta
71         "So, jealousy was it?  Now I know neither of us are faulty.  Your jealousy over Mary
72 is what sent me away," Kosta noted.  "And mine has brought me back, although far less skill-
73 fully, to topple you through Agent Gaudy Minsky.  Both attempts were mutually quite self-
74 destructive, and only one of them looks to have succedded."  Kosta then drooped his head.
75         After taking a moment to think over their past weeks actions, L'homme said, "And 
76 we see just how little we have truly accomplished....  We'll step out now, I realize that 
77 there must be matters you would like to settle before we must be off.  I'll leave you to
78 your farewells, alone."
79         "Some time alone...  Yes, that's what I need...  what we need right now, some time
80 alone," stammered Miss Lamb as she nervously worked over a few papers on her desk.
81         "Remember," said L'homme, "we'll be right outside.  Waiting."  Kosta simply nodded
82 in acknowledgement to L'homme's offering of solitude for he was speachless.  L'homme lead
83 the way out the door, followed by Agent Fellows, with the situation well in hand.
84 Despondantly, Kosta closed the door behind them...  There was silence.
85 
86         Mary walked slowly across the emptied office to Kosta.  "I'll never forget what
87 you meant to me," she said in a hushed voice.
88         Kosta was not sure of what to say, what to do until Mary tenderly placed her arms
89 around him and gave him a lingering kiss, holding onto him tightly.  In an instant he
90 realized and recipricated her actions.  He had hoped, foolishly, that it was a sign of
91 something he could look forward to, even now.
92         Slowly she loosened her hold on him although he still held on.  Her hands moved in
93 a way that he was unable to notice.  "And I'll never forget what you have done to me by
94 having left," she said coldly.  "You bastard!" she sobbed.
95       Then she very carefully planted the cold metal blade of her letter opener squarely
96 within Kosta's back, drawing them both toward her.  "I've given up pretending."
97         With that Kosta's body straightened, then began to crumble to the floor.  His grasp 
98 on Mary's dress became weak, the fabric passing between his fingers.
99 
100         Somehow the sound of Mary's voice accompanied by the sound of a body falling
101 brought L'homme and Fellows back to the inner office's door, it flew back open.
102         The scene was picturesque, and couldn't have been any clearer; Mary Lamb standing
103 still over the body of former NET Agent Kosta, crimson glistening from the blade in her
104 quivering hand to match that of the pool that began to spill onto the plush carpet.
105         "Do you get the impression, L'homme, that we were watching the wrong person all
106 this time?"
107         "You just keep an eye on Mr. BMW, I'll take care of things in here," he snapped back
108 at Fellows.  "And just where in the dickens is..."
109       "Alright, don't anybody move!  I've got you covered!" cried the voice as
110 the man
111 came spilling into the room with his .38/.45 cal. revolver/automatic waepon drawn in his
112 left/right hand.
113         "...Farley?" finished L'homme.
114         "Speak of the devil!  I think I just found him for you," added Fellows with a grin.
115 
116 kosta  kosta  kosta  k.sta  .osta  kost.  kos.a  kosta  ko..a  ko.t.  k.s..  .o..a  k....  .....
117 
118 1313131313131313131313131313131313131313131313131313131313131313
119 [K_ST APTAJ @DXJD LXPDO XE_PC @DRF^ AEDX@ JDIFA EDFED XMDLX 
120 DF\VX JPCLN _A[\D D_\XJ AHBD_ PXDPT ADVXF LP[LD _FPDF EDRAM 
121 PDPXD PTXEA DNCVC YRADX MDJAC [_@IF LZDP@ TFE[\ HBK_O XEPCD 
122 SXGRI DRFOA DPXDJ A\CFL DFLDP TADXJ XCLFQ CPFXL [LD_F LDEX\ 
123 ADSCU [LHBD _C@LI DS@XG RIDRF OADPX DJAPG JL[L_ DRCPA J[\@D 
124 _\GNT DR@C_ PAJDV AJTC_ VE[\\ HBK_S TFRAD XLDPT A_D[K _\FEE 
125 FX@L[ KLD_Y AEPDR GNOL_ DZXIE VAA@I DCLID CRR@H [BD_P TCPDL 
126 XLEA@ LEA[\ HBK_R @A[_S FEDN@ XXRFI ZA[LD _CZAL PDCPD RCJZA 
127 [OYR@ HB@?? 
128 13131313131313  03:05:48  131313131313  07/30/85  13131313131313
129 
130 """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
131   Police report that a yet unidentified man was found dead in the north-east 
132 section of town.  Aparently the victim had been stabbed to death and the body
133 was later dropped off in the remote section of town where it was later 
134 discovered by a routine security check in the warehouse district.  More reports
135 as information is made avalible.
136 """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""30"
137 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
138   The piper approached the strange-looking machine that Trainor seemed sp
139 proud of.  Disciplining his instinctive recoil, the piper forced himself to
140 admit that it was really attractive -- in a roccocco sort of way.  After all,
141 he mused to himself, decorations could be used to enhance the form of objects.
142 Why was it necessary to keep the object after the decoration had been carried
143 to the point where the object was overwhelmed?  Really, why should he have
144 any objections to stained glass observation windows?  And, after all,
145 reproductions of carved roses in stainless steel really did not look quite 
146 so out of place with the brass cherub blowing a long, straight trumpet
147 while balanced on one foot on the radiator cap.  Gently reaching out, the
148 piper touched the machine while Trainor beamed his approval.  A strainge
149 tingling warned the piper of leashed energies contained within this machine.
150   Gently fingering a bas relief along the door, the piper looked at Trainor
151 who seemed genuinly proud of his machine.  Glancing down the piper looked
152 at a scened embossed in a panel.  Startled, he glanced closer at the scene
153 that he had been tracing with his fingertips -- a woodland scene, a group
154 of young ladies who, refusing to be overcome by the excess heat, were
155 opting for the coolness of varying degrees of nudity -- a strange, hairy-
156 legged creature playing some sort of instrument -- a ...
157   Hastily, his face burning, the piper turned away from the scene graphically
158 depicted on the machine.
159 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
160 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=======:::::=====
161 gaaax!
162 (sorry about that...brother playing with keys..oh how I hate enter only!)
163     Zephyr sat there on his table, hurt at Trainor's utter unwillingness to let
164 him come along.  
165 (Error again.  change to:)
166       I sat there on my table, hurt at Trainor's utter refusal to let me come
167 with him in his pell-mell vehicle.  The words rang in my ears, and a small and silvery tear slided down my face.
168       I shopped down to the floor of the Inn, past some people I didn't know that well with swords and axes, and
169 waited for someone to open the door to enter or leave.  Someone left the inn, and I left, too.
170       I came upon the Pell-Mell.  Why, it was all I had expected it to be.  It
171 was utterly marvelous!  The design was so perfect!  It was a masterwork in 
172 itself.  It was just beutiful.  I hopped over to Trainor, who began to sneeze 
173 again, bidding me go away.  I backed off a bit, and then spoke saying "This Pell-Mell, I love it!  It's the most 
174 wonderful device I've ever seen.  I love the design, it's perfect." Trainor beamed ans Emu, Piper, and Scarlett 
175 Lion beoan to stare at me as if I were a candidate for a noose.
176     "Ho *sneeze!!* Small bunny.  Listen, I can't take you along." 
177     "Please!" I said, looking at Trainor with soulful eyes. 
178     "N-*Sneeze!* No."
179     I cried, Then I looked at Trainor and said "Then take this, to remember 
180 me while you are gone." I handed Trainor my very last Truffle.  He took it.
181     "*Sneeze! *sneeze!* SNEEZE!*
182     An idea struck me.  Maybe he wasn't really allergic to me at all.  I began 
183 to back away.
184     ">sneeze!< >SNEEZE!< >Sneeze!<"
185     I moved so far away that he couldn't possibly be irritated by me.
186     "Sneeze! Sneeze."
187     That was itt! I hopped straight into the air in truejoy, a feeling like joy
188 only better. (No, it's not a typo, it'S really spelled together: truejoy.) 
189     I took the truffle away and threw it as far as my little arms could, which
190 was just out of allergy range. 
191     Trainor sniffed, and smiled, saying "So I'M not allergic to you after all,
192 so I guess you can come along!" 
193     "Thank you!" I said.  I hopped onto his shoulder as he bent down to me. 
194     "So, you like my machine??"
195     "It's lovely!  Simply lovely!  Wonderful! Beutiful!"
196     Trainor smiled.
197 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::===Zephyr:=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====
198 Trainor:  Please don't get rid of me like this.  I won't encumber the adventure and I'll take good care of
199 myself.  Really!  Just wait and see!"
200  :::::=====:::::======:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::======:::::====:::::=====
201 [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/]
202   From a small window at the back of the inn a face peered at the large metal
203 contrivance.  A smile stole on to lips that had been still too long.  He smiled
204 broader as the group began to look over the machine, some with hesitation, some
205 with excitement.  Having some interest in large metalic devices he reached to 
206 retreve his cloak from the back of his chair.  Perhaps a little closer look.
207 No starry-eye adventurer this one, but a look wouldn't hurt.
208 [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] [/] THE TIN MAN [/] [/]
209 -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
210 Why, aren't you The Tin Man...  From, uh, OZ?
211 Hee hee, I couldn't resist.  Glad to see back..
212 _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ abacab_-_-_-_-_-_-_
213    Gee, he got more lines on this disk than he did in the whole movie.
214 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
215 Hey Milchar: I'll have a new version
216 of the terminal program for you the
217 next time we meet.  Maybe buffering,
218 maybe not...
219 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
220 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
221          Digitalian
222 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
223 Otay Zephyr....C'mon & use one name
224 instead of twenty-thousand!!!
225 Otay Sranul....C'mon & use one name
226 instead of thirty thousand!!!
227 Otay Mudge<the otter>...C'mon & use 
228 forty thousand!!!
229 Otay Cat...C'mon ***oh well I think
230 I've begun to press the point!!
231 Anyway I gotta make my mark here...
232 
233 
234 ^"^"^"^"^Chapter 1^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
235 
236 If anything I wanted was worth 
237 having, I tell you, Reagan would
238 have an intestinal heart attack!!!
239 oh well...my coice was made
240 and the new '85  Ferrari was it!!
241 She drove 15000 horses and 
242 everything but the sun roof was
243 turbo-charged...OOPS
244 wwwwoooooossssshhhhhhhh
245 woooooooooossssshhhhhhhhh!!!!
246 boom
247 
248 :::::the telecomm bulletin is as
249 follows...
250 the year is 3085 and the world
251 of automobile engineering is gone
252 totally replaced by space travel
253 <in case you were wondering all 
254 automobile manufacture companies
255 now make space vehicles>
256 :::::more news as it comes
257 This babe could KILL the Porche
258 91777!!! That was the crucial stock
259 fighter that won the indianapolis
260 500000 and it was only going a qua
261 rter of the capable speed! Although
262 it was fast it wasn't as fast as 
263 my baby!!
264 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^b^"
265 ^"^"^"^"^DIGITALIAN^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^
266 
267 
268 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
269       NEOHAMA
270 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
271 
272 
273       Chapter 3
274 Another Solution...
275 
276       As I was thinking about how
277 to get artificial gravity, I stumbled
278 across the subject "Centrifical
279 Force" and just for the heck of it
280 , started reading.
281       It told allabout how a spinning
282 object makes a "Gravity-like force".
283 That would be a good answer. All 
284 I had to do was set a cylinder-like
285 spaceship spining, slowly increase
286 the speed it was spinning until it
287 was just right. All my problems 
288 were solved... EXCEPT money
289 
290 
291 To Be CONTinued
292 __<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_
293 
294        NEOHAMA
295 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_
296 Cistop Mikey: Please oh please d
297 ete this entry aws well as the 
298 one by Digitalian.  I finally 
299 found a decent name that is
300 not being ridiculed and some
301 person blows it away! PLEASE!
302 :::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====:::::=====
303 *%_#*%_)@#*%_)@#*%)_@*%_)@#%)_@*%)_&@#^)_@#*)%_*@#)_%&@#)_%*@#_)%*@#)_%*@_)%*@
304 "Enough joking!" NET agent Parity screamed! "Don't you realize that one
305 of our fellow agents lies bloody at our feet!" Never is all of the missions
306 Fellows and Parity had been in together had L'homme ever acted so enraged.
307     "Farley, take Miss Lamb into the other room and keep her and Beamer
308 covered. Call Ian via comset, let him know we have regained Kosta, and have
309 him send in the cleanup units. Fellows, I want you to help me with Kosta."
310 Parity spoke like a man possessed. His actions were hurried yet even in the
311 semi-panic that permeated the room, Parity seemed to know what he was
312 doing. "We have to get him out to the car Fellows."
313      "But L'homme, it's too late. Kosta is kaput. Mary has seen to that."
314      "No it is not too late! Now help me or God forgive what I'll do to
315 you!"
316      "Ok, ok L'homme." Fellows knew when to back off. They had worked together
317 long enough to know each other's limits. L'homme had reached his emotional
318 limits now; nothing could be gained and everything lost by pressing matters.
319 The agents worked quickly, bundling up Kosta in blankets from a nearby bed-
320 room, and carrying him to their car outside the Lamb mansion. As they pulled
321 out, an unmarked van drove up to the front of the house. Fellows could
322 see in the rear-view mirror the Butler, Mary and her would-be suitor being
323 herded into the back of the van under the watchful eye of Eugene Farley.
324      Kosta is kaput, isn't he? Fellows pondered this while he drive through
325 the streets of San Francisco towards NET's Bay Area medical facilities, a
326 division of the Mt. Siani West Medical Group.
327      Ian would take care of everything at the house. Eugene would head up
328 the news-blackout. The neighbors will think this is another one of Mary's
329 party-coupes. Mary was famous for her elaborate party-preparations. NET
330 would find a way to answer all the questions. All the questions but one...
331      What did happen to Kosta? Did he survive his ordeal by blade? Did the
332 agents get him to the hospital in time? No one really knows except agent
333 Parity, and he isn't talking; and Kosta, and he is no-where to be found.
334 Maybe he isn't to be found because he simply isn't anymore... L'homme refused
335 to discuss the matter with Fellows or Farley, going out of his way to change
336 the subject whenever it was brought up.
337      "We need a rest guys. I suggest we take in the sights of San Francisco.
338 Fellow? I understand you are quite the expert on this city. Something about
339 1000 oddities and 1000 delight?"
340      "Oh-boy oh-boy oh-boy!" palpitated Farley.
341      "Settle down boy!" Fellows laughed. "Allow me to be your guide to this
342 beautiful city. Remember this is the queen of the Pacific!"
343      "Gawd no!!!" Parity and Farley said in unison.
344      "Just kidding, ha ha...Just kidding."
345 
346 			-	-	-	-	-
347 
348 Kosta? Let him rest in peace for now. Everyone will remember him, in the back
349 of their minds, and in the front of the conscience. Someday maybe, but for
350 now............
351 _*_$#*_)$*^_)#$*^_)#*#_$)^*#$ L'homme sans Parity *%_)*%_@)#%*_@%*_@%*@%*@%*%
352 sorry for typos- ch /is/in/ ch /he drive/he drove/
353 07070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070707070
354 FDSFR RDIFE VXEAD XMDOX EPCDF LDCDE GFPCY RAD\C LLAJD EXDTA DSFRR DYADC
355 
356 YRADP XHBJA PGJLD FMDTA DA^AJ DSFET AE[\D _SADC PDLAP DJAEV ANPDP TADIA
357 
358 CIDXJ DLACJ [C_IA CI[LH B_TAL NAD\U DNCJA DMXJD PTADY XIU[\ D_LXS DXLDP
359 
360 XDPTA DLA]P DZJAC PDLAP DCI^A LPGJA [MHB_ PTCPD \ACLE DUXGD KXETG C[MHB
361 
362 07070707070707070707070707070707070 July 30th, 1985 20:34:00 070707070707070
363 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
364 It was a dark and stormy night.  The old house creaked.  "C R E A K ! !", it 
365 went.  The only light was from a flickering candle.  I walked slowly down the 
366 hall, my eyes drifting warily from side to side.  I told them to stop wandering
367 around and get back in my head.  Approaching the door, I heard a faint beep of
368 a faintly beeping computer.  My knees turned to jelly.  Scooping them up, I put
369 them in a plastic bag for later.  I knew what was behind the door even before I
370 opened it.  As it opened, a musty odor flew out.  Then it screamed and ran down
371 the hall.  A tall figure was in the room, lit only by a computer screen.  The 
372 glasses and the dark hat it was wearing confirmed my deepest fears...  It was 
373 a Jeffslime.  I tried to run, but I realized my knees were in my pocket.  I was
374 doomed.......
375                                                 The Doctor-for Guido.
376 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
377 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
378 Doctor: I'm sure Guido will love his publicity.  One question, if you have
379 
380 time to enter that, why not some of your own stuff?
381 Max: Weeelllll.... sounds okay, but if I can ever get my act together long
382 enough to sit at the keyboard for a few hours, I've got this jim-dandy of a
383 terminal program idea going.  Not much of it will be original, but it will be
384 in a package that is compatible with EVERYTHING, i.e. new punter protocol for
385 those boards that I haunt, the text line upload and tone autodialing of
386 MEBterm, etc.  A hodge-podge of my other programs, so to speak.
387 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milchar +++++++++ July 30, 1985 ++++++++++++
388 %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
389 07/27/85, 0912: Robotics section of NET recieves (at long last!) vital IC's
390 used in the construction of IM series androids.  Only three this shipment, but
391 they are immediately installed in available androids.
392 07/27/85, 1036: Three newly completed IM series androids shipped out of
393 Robotics section.
394 07/27/85, 1040: <Malfunction of navcomp onboard shipping comp.  Cargo reported
395 loose on sub-level fourteen.>
396 07/27/85, 1123: <Break-in detected- location, Ian MacHinery's private library
397 on the fourteenth level.  Security units dispatched.>
398 07/27/85, 1201: <Security reports private library undamaged, but three items
399 have been removed.>
400 07/27/85, 1217: <Security reports android IM17 found on bottom of out-of-order
401 turbolift shaft.  Only pieces remain.  Item one from private library recovered.
402 Maintenance sent to clean up mess.>
403 07/27/85, 1222: <Armory reports missing submachine gun, standard issue.>
404 07/27/85, 1256: <Android found in Botanical Garden #3, shorted out due to
405 sprinkling system.  Was trying to dig a hole in the turf.>
406 07/27/85, 1327: <Semi-automatic fire reported on level thirteen.>
407 07/27/85, 1417: <Item two from library found, left carelessly in a corridor.>
408 07/27/85, 1422: <Android found in main libary, destroyed by gun fire from
409 several security personnel.  The android had fired at several bookshelves of
410 valuable information.  Item three from personal library found.>
411 ....
412 To: Ian MacHinery
413 From: 06 on behalf of the Archives Department
414 Subject: Errant Androids
415    Sir, as you can see from the report on your desk, your special-model IM
416 androids have caused a bit of a mess.  To explain, I shall have to relate
417 what I have gathered from the Robotics Department.
418    First, an android is very impressionable for the first few hours after
419 activation.  What it sees and hears can have a very strong effect on what it's
420 actions are.
421    From the evidence, I would say that these three androids were affected by
422 what they saw in your personal library after the transport vehicle broke down.
423 Perhaps stronger measures may be taken to prevent such occuring in the future.
424 The three items that the androids removed (a copy of Alice in Wonderland, 
425 Issue #94 of The Adventures of Bugs Bunny, and your Second-Annual Mr. T's
426 Super A-Team Coloring Book) have been replaced.  Only the small matter of 
427 damages to the main archives section remains, the damage of the other two 
428 androids being negligible.  The total is, sir, $17,393.68.  The bill will be
429 sent to you by the end of next week.
430  
431 Respectfully yours, 06.
432 %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
433 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^""^"^"^"^"^"
434        Digitalian
435 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
436          Chapter 2
437 
438 I drove my selective turbine driven jet pack down to the central station
439 on the space walker....and there was the ride i was waiting for. We rode
440 into Lynn Kirby XXXX used jets and she was right on the middle turntable...
441 as beautiful as ever! I stood in awe--open mouthed like I would have stepped
442 on my new welded grip dentures!
443 Anyway good ole' Lynn walked over <his face red like he just made a 3 million
444 spectocredit account that flew away like a prehistoric red-breasted robin!
445 and he said "boy you can't think of how much I'd like to sell you that...but
446 I don't think you're old enough."
447 "here's my ID."I said as I waved my digital age unit ion the tip of his nose.
448 "OKAY!!!" I'll tell you he lit up like a torch!!
449 I hopped in and revved the jets up...and the thing felt so good I wanted to 
450 go right then!!
451 First I threw my account spector at him and he stuck it on the side of the jet 
452 and poink! the cost was his!
453 OOPS!
454 
455 woooooosssssshhhhh
456 
457 woooooosssssshhhhhhhh
458 
459 r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rrb....
460 BLAM!!!
461 :::::telecomm bulletin is as follows
462 The year is 3085.
463 The date is 6/45
464 <of course the seasons change when in outer space, okay?>
465 it is summer...as always
466 and another record has been broken for the dry spell...
467 305000789 days without rain<or even a sign of it>
468 It's gonna be a scorcher today:
469 solar winds up to 7800 MPH
470 now check your nuclear reactors today..we need weather watchers!
471 :::::more news as it comes
472 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
473           DIGITALIAN
474 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
475 
476 
477 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
478        Neohama
479 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
480 
481 
482 
483       Hey Mudge er Sranul er Cat er Zephyr...
484 I think it's pitiful that you got mad enough at digitalian to call pranks
485 on his mother (you must be the real low life). It's also pitiful that
486 when HE called you, you said that
487 Sysop had delaeted his entry about you. (Which is a FLAT DOWN lie)along with
488 everything else you say.
489 
490 You couldn't even admit yoou were Mudge, Zephyr.. etc.
491    I'm digitalian2 but now have changed my name. Digitalian(1) was Lone 
492 Ranger but will never use that name again. (We can admit it.. you cant)
493 
494 
495 P.S. (Who ever wrote the first one)...
496 Please write another TWIT Test.
497      
498              Yours Truly Neohama (digit2)
499 _>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>_>
500 _<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<_<
501 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^
502 HQave fffuuuunnnn!
503 <Whoever you are!>
504 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^
505 -+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
506   E A R T H  W I N D  &  F I R E
507   * * * * *  * * * *  *  * * * *
508 +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
509 
510 Okay people...I'm one of the few
511 lucky members of Visional Software
512 group and I am extremely sorry to
513 tell you that DIGITRON BBS had
514 to be taken off the air because of
515 prank phone calls at all hours--
516 DAY OR NIGHT!
517 If you were wondering...Don't call
518 or We'll have your calls traced.
519         10-q
520         ttyl
521 -+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
522   E A R T H  W I N D  &  F I R E
523   * * * * *  * * * *  *  * * * *
524 +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
525 
526 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
527   looking over the device quite carefully, so as not to miss any detail,
528 the depictions on the exterior of the craft found me easily detained as i 
529 would contemplate the possible ramifacations of the scenes before my 
530 startled eyes.
531   another sneeze came from behind me, the sneeze of discomfort.  i turned 
532 to face trainor, asking if there would be anything i could do to make
533 the unpleasant situation any more bearable.
534   "nay, i believe i shall have to ride out this storm, whatever the cause
535 may be.  it all seems so confusing"
536   as i had turned to face trainor, the hooded shawl that covered the entire 
537 upper portion of my body was allowed to fall open in its place.  trainors
538 gaze met with the fine embroidery that decorated my sturdy tunic, there was
539 the unmistakable image of the standing lion, forward paws outstreched in mid
540 air.  frustraction of the inability to aid him made me turn back to his
541 splendid machine where i found zephyr.
542   "it is very much a shame that we won't be able to take along this fine 
543 animal," i commented to the crowd in general.  "i find it to be so...
544 so very beautiful.  do you know, zephyr my dear, that you have the smoothest
545 pelt that i have ever felt?"
546   "oh thank you very, very, very much fine lady!  i pride myself in the 
547 grooming of my fur, appearances are everything to us smaller creatures,
548 you know!"  the exclaimation uttered from the rabbit very happily as it 
549 twiched its warm ears.
550   "yes, very much a shame..."  i placed the rabbit with great care back 
551 down on the solid earth.  just then a strong gust of wind blew over the 
552 the crowd that had gathered outside the inn.  my shawl had been waved by 
553 this wind and had turned inside out.  the reason for its being so warm for
554 me was no longer hidden as a look of panic filled the gleam in zephyr's 
555 tiny eyes, the inside of my shawl lined with the skins of his brothers.
556 yes, it was so very warm now, even in this breeze.
557 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  the scarlet lion  &&&&&&&
558 
559 ***********************************************************************
560 I'm back to spy from a long absence.  I mourn for Kosta.  Jack and Kosta
561 now have tennis partners at the great court in the sky.
562 **************************************************************kathyd****
563 
564 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
565   The piper, keeping his eyes averted from some scenes that he found personally
566 rather too graphic (after all, shouldn't some things in life be left as
567 mysteries?), walked over to Trainor who seemed to be recovering from his fit
568 of sneezing.
569   "Isn't it about time we got going?" the piper asked.  "Your machine seems
570 to be attracting attention -- and one of the major things I have learned on
571 my adventures is that attention usually brings an unpleasant aftermath."
572 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
573 :::::=====:::::=====
574 Scarlet Lion: *gasp!*
575  Scarlet Lion: (again) But I thougxht I was coming.  Trainor'Ss not 
576 allergic to me, it's my truffles.  I threw them away and he stopped
577 sneezing.  That was a while ago!
578 Piper:  I'm game.  
579 Trainor: *resting on your sshoulder*
580 Let's GO!
581 :::::=====:::::=====
582 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
583          Digitalian
584 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
585 Oh jes' thoughtI  I might mention that
586 EARTH WIND & FIRE is the team name
587 for me & Neo, Otay?
588 
589   Now to leave upon the pedistal another mark
590 ^"^"^"^
591         CHAPTER 3
592 
593 "It's all yours,"he said in a dreary grim voice...I didn't know what was up,
594 but something was fishy.
595 I really got worryied about him!
596 Anyway, I went home to sprite:1.
597 ">click< >r-r-r< What's up Digit?"he squeaked
598 His small but husky body wiggling as his Laser Discs flew in and out of place.
599 "You look discouraged"he said
600 I looked at him. He was a MESS!
601 "What happened to you, Sprite:1?" I asked.
602 He sat for a minute and clicked.
603      ">R-R-R-R< uhh...uhh..>click< he-he well...ummm"
604 He had guilt written all over his transistors...So I ran into the kitchen.
605         ***ARRGHHH***
606 Here laid all the instant spaghetti capsuls....EVERYWHERE!!!
607 ">blip< >r-r-r< >CLICK!< He-he...I uhh...my robotic food processor mechanism
608 went what you call 'bananas?'"he squeaked in a very low voice.
609 :::::telecomm bulletin is as follows
610 OOPS...no news today!!
611 It's a habit...sorry!
612 :::::no news if it doesn't come!
613 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
614           Digitalian
615 ^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"^"
616 *%_#@*_)%*@#_)%*@#)_*%_@#)*%_@#)*_)&^_)*@#)_@#)_^&#@_%(@#_)%*@#_)*%^@_#&^_@*@_#
617 TOP to BOTTOM...
618 Mikey: Will you be at the PCS meeting tomorrow? Will you be bringing CL disks
619 and/or Archive disks?
620 Piper: I'll probably be trying to contact you Thursday afternoon or Friday. I
621 am getting through some tests right now and I am putting most of my energy
622 into their completion. Until then...
623 Leonard: I hope to see you there.
624 Voyeur: You too I hope. I will have the disks that we have spoken of before.
625 Milch: Any further word on Honors stuff?
626 Kosta: Yes we will miss you. Say 'hi' to Jack, if indeed you and he are at
627 the same resting place. How strange both men met their fate by the hands of
628 a woman. Something to ponder this day-in-age.
629 *_%#*@_)%*_%)*_@#)%*@_)*%@_#%*@ L'homme sans Parity %*_*%_#@)*%_#)@%*_@#)*%@#_

TOTAL NUMBER OF LINES = 629 
