                         CultWatch Response
                          Volume I, Issue 6

From the Editor
by Gerald Bliss

That Dangerous Dabbling

Many "cult-bashers" talk about "dabbling"  (trying a few things from a
magazine article or  book and reading a few more  books) as being "the
first and  least dangerous step  into Satanism". But  is it the  least
dangerous?

Not  according to  Steven Daniels,  a probation  and parole officer in
Green  Bay,  WI  (as  quoted  in  the  November  27, 1988 Appleton, WI
Post-Crescent, as reported by  Maija Penikis). "Teen-age dabblers" are
the least sophisticated,  but account for a great  deal of crime. They
are mostly white, intelligent, alienated, bored and somewhat affluent.

"They surround  themselves with a  barrage of heavy  metal music whose
lyrics  are  filled  with  drugs,  fantasy,  suicide,  violent  sex --
primarily against women."

"Self-styled"  occultists account  for 28%  to 35%  of the sociopathic
serial killers.  "They pick and choose  whatever they want out  of the
satanist beliefs to  give themselves 'permission' to be  as brazen and
bizarre  as they  want to  be. They  are the  dangerous ones," Daniels
said.

Also not according to Sandi Gallant, an officer with the San Francisco
Police  Department.  In  an  article  from  the  Nov. 16, 1988, Juneau
(Alaska) Empire, she  is quoted as saying: "I  am less concerned about
cult  groups  acting  together  than  I  am  with the individual who's
dabbling in  satanism on his own,  looking for a way  to justify doing
sick things."

Why  do certain  witch-bashing ministries  say that  dabbling is  less
harmful? Because  the people they consider  "experts" as being "former
witches" were  dabblers. These people  are very invested  in believing
that they weren't very deep into satanism. An article in Cosmopolitan,
a book by  Zolar or Paul  Huson (most  of  this type of  thing we call
"Witchcrap", but  it is still very  dangerous if believed), a  copy of
the Necronomicon (a  hoax, but a dangerous hoax),  and they think they
can  call themselves  "Witches" and  start throwing  around terms like
"White Witch" if they really think they are basically good.

To us here  at CWR, the only difference between  the "dabbler" and the
"self-styled occultist"  is that the  latter has gotten  more serious.
There is  no training, no  actual study, no  belief system other  than
what the person selects from dubious, sensationalized materials.

We  have been  using the  term, "legitimate  witch". While  we make no
claims as to  what is and is not legitimate  (determining this is what
Goddess gave each of us brains  for), here are some guidelines. All of
these are basic concepts, and there will be exceptions.

        1. Legitimate  witches do not  charge for lessons,  other than
        paying  for renting  the  teaching  space and  making whatever
        copies  are necessary,  etc. This  is written  into the  Craft
        Laws.

        2. Legitimate  witches do not publish  how-to books containing
        harmful  or  manipulative  spells.  Major legitimate published
        witches  include  Raymond  Buckland,  Marion Weinstein, Margot
        Adler,  Scott  Cunningham,   Doreen  Valiente,  Starhawk,  and
        Stewart Farrar. This list excludes legitimate Ritual Magicians
        (such as Israel  Regardie), since Ritual Magick is  not a form
        of our religion (and many do  not practice RM as a religion at
        all).

        3. Legitimate witches do not teach the Craft to minors without
        informed parental permission. They seldom teach minors at all,
        since there are legal problems even with written permission.

        4.  Legitimate  witches  never  ask  their  students for blind
        obedience,  and usually  encourage inquisitive  examination of
        everything they are taught.

        5. Legitimate witches  do not break the laws  of their country
        of residence, with exceptions sometimes being made in areas of
        civil disobedience and matters of conscience.

This is  a start. There  will be exceptions,  and there are  many more
things that  most trained, experienced, legitimate  witches do/are. If
you  have questions,  contact us  here at  CWR, and/or  refer to  Kerr
Cuhulain's "A Law Enforcement Guide  to Wicca", available from CWR for
$10 ppd.  CWR will soon  be publishing a  variety of brochures  on the
Craft for further information.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

In This Issue...

- Matamoros Cult Killings, by Kerr Cuhulain

- Reviews by Rowan Moonstone

- Plight of the Pagan Policeman, Part V

- and whatever we can squeeze into 6 pages of text...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Matamoros Cult Killings
by Kerr Cuhulain

We  have  received  quite  a  collection  of  articles  from  numerous
newspapers  on the  Matamoros incident.  They run  the entire spectrum
from good to bad. Many of  these papers are contradictory, calling the
Matamoros  cult  members  Satanists,  Santeros,  or  practitioners  of
Voodoo,  and then  refuting this   in an  adjacent article  by another
reporter. What really  happened down there? Was it  a Satanic cult? If
not,  who started  these rumors?  We do  not propose  to go  into many
details of the  incident here. Basically, this group  was shipping 450
kg (1000 lb) of marijuana per week into the United States and believed
that their rituals  would protect them from prosecution.  Here is what
some of the experts had to say about the Matamoros cult in the papers:

Sgt. Jesse  Hernandez, Fort Worth P.D.  Gang Intelligence Unit (tracks
ritualistic crime): "And from all indications these killings are going
to be part of Palo Mayombe." 1

Dr.  Raphael  Martinez,  administrative   officer  at  the  Dade/Miami
Criminal Justice  Council (a Miami-based expert  on Santeria and other
folk religions): (In speaking about  this cult's apparent use of human
body parts  in their rituals) "...  are definitely part and  parcel of
Palo  Mayombe.  ...To  compare  these  people  with  practitioners  of
Santeria  or even  with practitioners  of Palo  Mayombe is like saying
that what Jim Jones did in Guyana is a good example of Christianity...
When these beliefs fall into the hands of already sick people, they do
really weird things." 2

Det. Jaime  Escalante, investigator for  the Homicide Division  of the
Houston P.D., reported  that drug smuggling was often  related to Palo
Mayombe. 3

Joseph  Murphy,  theology  professor  at  Georgetown  University: "The
killings at Matamoros have as much to do with Santeria as Christianity
has  to   do  with  Jonestown.  Human   sacrifice  is  a  psychopathic
occurrence, not Santeria." 4

Dr. Charles Wetli,  deputy chief medical examiner of  Dade County, FL,
commenting on Santeria: "The basic  tenets are not ones that encourage
human sacrifice." 5

Wade Davis, a Boston anthropologist and Voodoo expert, discounted that
the Matamoros cult was practicing  voodoo, which also does not involve
human sacrifice. 6

Even  Tom Wedge,  author of  The Satan  Hunter, has  gone on record as
saying that the Matamoros killings were not related to Satanism. 7

What did the  Matamoros cult members believe? Well,  from the evidence
at the scene and the intelligence  gathered so far, it would seem that
they  based their  beliefs on  Palo Mayombe,  a Cuban spirit religion.
This  religion was  created when  slaves from  the Bantu  tribe in the
Congo brought their tribal beliefs to Cuba, where it was combined with
the  Catholic  beliefs  of  their  owners.  This  belief  is  far more
succinctly  explained  in  Migene  Gonzalez-Wippler's  book, Santeria:
African  Magic  in  Latin  America  (Original  Products, New York, NY,
1973).

The paraphernalia  recovered at the  scene in Matamoros  included four
cauldrons (one large and two small) which can be identified from their
contents (some of  the victims' brains, blood, human  and animal bone,
turtle shells,  chicken and goat  heads, gold colored  beads, etc.) as
ngangas, a form of charm used in Palo Mayombe. Also found was an altar
with ritual candles, broken glass, cigars, chilis, and bottles of cane
liquor, also consistent with Palo Mayombe.

Where this group differs from Palo  Mayombe groups is in the source of
their  human body  parts. Where  these parts  are normally obtained by
Mayomberos (followers  of Palo Mayombe) from  graves or purchased from
medical supply houses, the Matamoros cult members kidnapped and killed
to obtain them.

The paraphernalia and statements of the accused in no way suggest that
they were  Satanists. Their rituals and  paraphernalia do not resemble
any Satanic  ritualism that has  been reported to  date. Nor was  this
group  practicing  Santeria,  another  faith  formed  by syncretism of
African tribal beliefs  with Catholicism. In the case  of Santeria, it
was Yoruba (Nigerian)  tribal beliefs that were involved.  Nor is Palo
Mayombe related  to Voodoo, a  religion formed from  the syncretism of
Nagos, Ibos,  Aradas, and Dahomean tribal  beliefs with Catholicism in
Haiti.

Unfortunately, many of those involved in both the investigating of and
the  reporting  of  this  incident  are  apparently  ignorant  of  the
existence of  these faiths, never  mind the differences  between them.
They therefore fall back on  their limited knowledge of occult related
crime, obtained  from TV, the newspapers,  and the many self-appointed
"experts" out there. As a result,  they came out with statements which
the press reported as follows:

Lt. George Gavito, Cameron County Sheriff's Dept. (investigator at the
scene): "They prayed to the devil so the police would not arrest them,
so bullets would  not kill them and so they  would make money." 7 This
is mostly true, except that they were not praying to the devil.

Carlos  Tapia,  Cameron  County  Sheriff's  Deputy:  "Apparently  Sara
(Aldrete) was  leading a double  life; as a  witch in Mexico  and as a
dean's honor roll student at Texas Southmost College." 8 Again, almost
true, but Aldrete did not practice Wicca.

Helen  Kilroy  (mother  of  victim  Mark  Kilroy):  "I think that (the
suspects) must  have been possessed  by the devil." 10  Obviously this
woman is not an expert witness on this subject.

Judy  Strader  (18-yr.-old  friend  of  Aldrete's  at  Texas Southmost
College), claimed that aldrete wore a  necklace with a pentagram, 11 a
fact played up in several articles. However, all of the other students
interviewed  stated  that  Aldrete  wore  "medallions"  and  said that
Aldrete would not allow anyone to touch them.

The Associated Press articles picked  up on these remarks, and earlier
articles (April 12-13, 1989) had  numerous references to the Matamoros
group as "a satanic cult of drug smugglers" or "voodoo practicing". It
is also in the AP articles that Sara Aldrete is repeatedly referred to
as  having been  called "the  witch" by  cult members.  In fact,  they
called her  "la bruja". This is  often translated from the  Spanish as
"the witch", with witch being used in  the manner in which it is often
defined in common English dictionaries. It is more properly translated
in  this case  as "the  sorceress", a  point that  AP missed.  Someone
familiar with  the works of Carlos  Castaneda might have picked  up on
this, though.

Some  articles  speculate  that  cannibalization  was  taking place at
Matamoros, probably due to the  fact that the cauldrons (ngangas) were
found just outside  of the hut where the  homicides took place. Again,
lack of knowledge  of Palo Mayombe beliefs leads  these speculators to
try to interpret  what they see in terms of  their popular beliefs and
urban legends.

Predictably,  several of  our anti-Pagan  friends have  jumped on  the
bandwagon to try to use this incident to sell their Satanism theories.
It is interesting to note that many of these people are apparently
confused  by Matamoros,  since it  does not  fit neatly into their
definitions of  Satanic systems. They claim  that this incident is
Satanic,  but had  to admit  that there  were major discrepancies.
Horn's statement is typical:  "Where there's drugs involved, often
you will  find Satanism. What is  odd is that the  bodies were not
cremated."

All  of these  individuals made  similar comments.  The fact that this
cult  didn't go  to fantastic   lengths to  destroy the  evidence goes
against  the theories  being  taught  by fundamentalist  "occult crime
experts"  at  present.  If  the  average  "satanic  cult" takes as few
precautions as these suspects did,  then there certainly can't be many
around or we'd have found them all over the place by now. This is what
true experts, such as the FBI's  Kenneth Lanning, have been saying for
some time.

In fact,  the most revealing  comment with regards  to these alarmists
and sensationalists  comes from Lindell  Bishop, Director of  Criminal
Justice for  the Central Texas  Council of Governments  in Benton, TX:
"If we didn't do anything else  but go into the business of conducting
seminars on satanism, we'd do a booming business." 12

The  staff   at  CWR  concurs  wholeheartedly   with  this  sentiment.
Anti-Paganism is a large and lucrative business!

Footnotes:

1. Dallas Morning News, 4-13-89, "Cult leader sought in U.S., Mexico",
by Lee Hancock

2. Dallas  Morning News, 4-13-89, "Use  of body parts common  in Cuban
occult religion", by Lee Hancock

3. Corpus  Christi  Caller   Times,  4-15-89,  "Mexicans   descend  on
Matamoros in search of missing relatives", by Joel Williams

4. New York  Newsday,  4-14-89,  "Human sacrifice  link irks  Santeria
flock", by Michael Powell

5. ibid.

6. USA Today, 4-13-89, "A perverse  twist on ancient rites", by Jeanne
DeQuine

7. Sunday Oklahoman, 5-7-89,  "Mexican ritual slayings underscore need
for cult cops", AP news story

8. Corpus Christi Caller Times, 4-12-89, "Missing Spring Break reveler
among victims", by David Hanners

9.  Corpus  Christi  Caller  Times,  4-14-89,  "Remains of 13th victim
discovered", by Eloy O. Aguilar

10. USA Today,  4-13-89, "Cult godfather hunted", by  Julie Morris and
Steve Marshall

11. same as Footnote 3

12.  Corpus  Christi  Caller  Times,  4-14-89,  "The Smoking Gun?", by
Shelley Emiling

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Reviews
by Rowan Moonstone

The Edge of Evil- The Rise of Satanism in North America by
Jerry Johnston, Word Publishing, Dallas, 1989

At  first glance,  I wasn't  too  hopeful  for this  book. Any  volume
dedicated to  Sean Sellers with  a forward by  Geraldo Rivera has  two
strikes against it to begin with.

Fortunately,  my  fears  were  not  borne  out  at  all.  Johnston has
traversed the country looking for research in this book. In the course
of  his travels,  he has   talked with  police officials,  health care
professionals, authors, and teens in trouble. The picture that emerges
overall is  one in which the  alleged international Satanic conspiracy
does not exist,  but one in which there are  a great number of lonely,
unhappy  teenagers looking  for acceptance  and a  sense of belonging.

However,  there were  still things  in it  that disturbed  me greatly.
First and  foremost was the  list of sources  which Johnston considers
reputable.  I would  hardly recommend  Passport Magazine  to anyone as
excellent research material. Although  Johnston takes great issue with
the purported "W.I.C.C.A.  Letters" and rightly labels tham  a hoax of
the first  water, he goes  on to believe  the Satanic ritual  calendar
published in the same volume. This calendar is so extensive that if it
were to be  truly followed, there would be Satanic  rituals on one out
of  three nights  of the  year!

Other sources  cited as credible  by Johnston were  Chick Publications
magazine  Battlecry.  Chick  has  published  some  of the most extreme
anti-Catholic hate  literature on the  market today, and  his research
has been called into question by such authorities as Gordon Melton and
Christianity Today. I hardly think these are sterling recommendations.

By far  the most ludicrous  story is taken  from Larry Kahaner's  book
Cults That  Kill in which  a supposed former  cult member talks  about
killing cattle in  a Tulsa, OK field. Obviously,  the author has never
dealt with cattle. Recently I had an experience of picking some lilacs
from around  the outside of a  pasture in which were  cattle that were
not familiar with  me; I was shortly forced to  leave the area because
of the  hostility of the  livestock. I was  afraid they were  going to
come through  the barbed wire  fence to trample  me. I cannot  imagine
cattle standing still to be butchered by strangers. A single cow might
be killed,  but the remainder  of the herd  would stomp the  intruders
rather thoroughly.  As for the 200-foot  boom that was supposed  to be
mounted on the top of the van which allowed the cultists access to the
field without  leaving footprints... the  sheer physics of  a 200-foot
boom that could  lift a 1500 lb. cow off  the ground would necessitate
that the van be more massive than a tractor trailer rig.

Johnston even  went to Oklahoma  to interview a  Witch. I WISH  he had
come to Oklahoma  City, where I was living at  the time. The lady that
he spoke  with was a solitary  with seemingly little knowledge  of the
Craft and, as a result, came across  as a bit of a flake. Perhaps this
is  just Johnston's  writing, but  I wish  he had  sought out  someone
knowledgable in the Craft.

I cannot  recommend  this  book  whole-heartedly,  but  neither  can I
condemn it outright. The best I can  say is... read it with a grain of
salt  and a  healthy dose  of skepticism.  And check  the sources (and
their sources, and...)


Satanism,  Is  Your  Family  Safe?  by  Ted  Schwarz  and Duane Empey,
Zondervan Books, Grand Rapids,MI; 1988

Unlike most Christian books on the  subject of Satanism, this book has
a great  deal  of  things  to  recommend  it.  On  the other hand, the
historical research is  so sloppily done that it  cases doubt upon the
veracity of the findings of the authors.

On the positive  side, Schwarz and Empey seem to  have a good grasp on
the  fact that  there is  a great  deal of  hysteria surrounding  this
issue. On page 8 they write,  "In recent times, Satan, like the Bible,
seems  to have  become a  scapegoat for  the bigots,  the crazies, the
troubled and the lost. Many otherwise well-educated individuals define
whatever  they fail  to understand  as 'satanic'."  They also  readily
recognise the fact  that the Christian religion has  had it's share of
problems, to wit:  "History, of course, is filled  with Christians who
have  misinterpreted  the  Bible.  They  have  justified  such acts as
slavery, the supression of women, and the denial of other human rights
by either  quoting the Bible out  of context or simply  creating Bible
passages where none existed." (pages 71-72)

But for all their fine words, the two authors then buy into the theory
of a Satanist  behind every tree and rampant  ritualistic child abuse.
They go  deeply into detail  on a case  involving a family  called the
"Cambridge"  family,  but  refuse  to  give  any  details of the case,
assuring  the  readers  that,  "Although  extensive  documentation  is
available  concerning  ritual  child  abuse,  drug  abuse, and murder,
charges  have not  been filed  due to  technicalities relating  to the
statue of limitations, the unwillingness  of witnesses to testify, and
similar difficulties." As I have  pointed out frequently before, there
is NO statute  of limitations on murder. Another  point to consider is
the fact that  IF these heinous crimes took place,  it would seem that
the  victims of  them would  want the  perpetrators caught and stopped
before  someone   else  got  hurt.  The   excuses  seem  entirely  too
"convenient" for my taste!

Finally,  there is  the point  of the  absolutely unexcusable research
concerning  the  origins  of  Voodoo.  "Voodoo  began  in  France with
peasants  conbining concepts  from the  Knights Templar,  the Catholic
Church, & remnants  of the Druid Teachings" (p.  35). Nothing could be
further from the truth. Any interested person who cares to do the most
basic research  can find out  that Voodoo is  a mixture of  the Yoruba
religions  native to  Africa and  Roman Catholicism,  which originated
during the  slave trade. The only  connection it has to  the French at
all is the  fact that many of the  slaves were bought and sold  on the
French held islands of Haiti, Martinique, and other Caribbean islands.
Voodoo has almost nothing in common with Druidism.

While Schwarz and Empey do offer  some valuable advice to parents with
teens who may  become involved with the occult  as dabblers, and while
they do  point out that the  only "occultic" crimes for  which we have
hard  evidence have  been done  by teens  who come  from dysfunctional
families, I do not feel that this book would be useful to CWR readers.
The authors'  scholarship is entirely  too much in  question for their
findings  to  be  accepted  without  a  great  deal  of  corroborating
evidence.

                --------------------------------

CWR Publications

Kerr Cuhulain's "A Law Enforcement Guide to Wicca" is now in print. It
is  a professionally  produced publication  of approx.  40 pages.  The
first  printing  is  almost  gone,  but  we  have  printed another run
already; don't miss it! Only $10.00 ppd.

CWR will be  publishing an expanded version of  Rowan Moonstone's "The
Origins of Halloween", with additional source material. The price will
be $1.00 ppd., with volume discounts. Order now!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

EX-CULTIST SOUGHT BY TEXAS AUTHORITIES

CWR  has received  several articles  from Texas  concerning one  Marti
Johnston,  who  is  associated  with  the  Cult  Awareness Council. In
January, 1989, at a meeting in  Anahuac, TX, she spoke of witnessing a
child sacrifice of an 8-year-old girl  from the Tomball, TX area eight
years earlier. Shortly after this presentation, Tomball police officer
Leroy Michna sought contact with  Ms. Johnston in connection with this
alleged crime.  When his attempts  were unsuccessful, he  obtained the
help of Harris County Assistant D.A. Casey O'Brian. In an article from
the  Daily  Pasadena  Citizen,  Feb.  25,  1989,  O'Brian is quoted as
saying,"It  was referred  to me.  I  attempted  to get  hold of  Marti
Johnston.  For whatever  reason she  won't talk  to us.  We don't know
where she is."

Authorities in  the Tomball area say  there are no reports  of missing
girls dating from the time period in which Ms. Johnston claims to have
seen the  child abducted and killed.  "We have no homicide  to link it
to. Why she would make those claims  and then be hesitant to talk with
authorities is  reason to question  her motives," said  O'Brian in the
Houston Chronicle, March 6, 1989.

Johnston's location  is known to  Dorothy Seabolt of  the Houston Cult
Awareness Council, according to the Chronicle article, but Ms. Seablot
refuses  to  disclose  Ms.  Johnston's  location  because  of fear for
Johnston's life. She claims that  Johnston has received death threats,
and has had  to move numerous times in the  past to avoid being killed
by cult members.

We here  at CWR are most  happy to see the  police investigating these
claims.  If there  is evidence,  lets find  those responsible  for the
crime and  pub them behind  bars where they  can hurt no  one else. If
there is no  evidence, let's defuse the hysteria  before somebody gets
hurt.

For further information on this case, refer to the following newspaper
articles:

"Crowd Hears About  Satanic Cults", Anahuac (TX) Weekly,  Feb. 8, 1989
"Assistant DA Wants to Talk to Cult Expert", Humble Echo (Channelview,
TX) Feb.  22, 1989
"DA Seeking 'Sacrifice' Information", by Virginia Hahn, Daily Pasadena
(TX) Citizen, Feb. 25, 1989
"Tale  of  Child's  Ritual  Slaying  Vexes  Lawmen",  by Bill Disessa,
Houston Chronicle, March 6, 1989

----------------------------------------------------------------------

PLIGHT OF THE PAGAN POLICEMAN
PART VI
by Kerr Cuhulain

The other day I went looking for a Sergeant to affirm the affidavit on
the back of  an appearance notice that I'd issued  to a party that I'd
arrested for  theft. Very briefly,  this involved plunking  it down in
front of  someone the rank  of Sergeant or  higher, taking an  oath on
religious scripture (eg: Bible, Koran,  etc.) or making an affirmation
(no  scripture  required).  Being  a   Wiccan  officer,  I  affirm  my
affidavits. This practice is rather rare, since Wiccan policemen are a
rather rare commodity  these days. Consequently, I often  find that if
the NCO  that I plunk  my affidavit  in  front of doesn't  know me, he
won't  know the  correct wording.  So  I  have a  copy of  the correct
wording  on  the  back  of  my  appearance  notice  book  and  a small
contingency package for those special situations.

As luck would have it, the  only Sergeant available then was one newly
assigned to our division and one who  didn't know me. He'd never had a
Pagan officer plunk  an appearance notice for affirmation  in front of
him before.  I therefore had  to explain at  length the procedure  and
reassure him that this was not  some practical joke. Satisfied at last
that this  was a legal  procedure under the  Oaths Ace, he  signed the
affidavit.  He  did  not  ask  me  what  my  beliefs were and I didn't
volunteer the information. He then left the room.

Now  while this  was happening,  a Corporal,  also newly  arrived, was
watching  this procedure  from across  the roe  of NCO's  desks. As  I
walked away with  my completed affidavit he said,  "Well! Can you beat
that! There ARE some agnostics in this department!"

I stopped to squint at him.  "Meaning me?"

"Uh...yes."

"What makes you think that I'm an agnostic?"

"Well...uh...you don't believe in God."

I picked  up  the  Websters  dictionary  on  the  Sergeants  desk and,
flipping it open read the definition of agnostic to the Corporal: "one
who holds the  view that any ultimate reality (as  God) is unknown and
probably unknowable." I  then continued, "What makes you  think that I
don't believe in something other than Jehovah?"

"Do you?"

"Yes."

The Corporal now  had a puzzled expression on  his face. He stammered,
"But...you must be an atheist. There isn't anything else."

I flipped to another page: "Atheism:  `a disbelief in the existence of
deity.'  There  are  plenty  of  other  deities  out there. What about
Buddhism, Islam, Sikhism...?"

"Oh, but those are false faiths."

"What's real then?"

The Corporal  puffed himself up  and adopted his  best sermon for  the
pulpit  posture. He  then said:  "I'm a  Catholic. The  source of  our
problems is  that people have  turned away from  the Bible. I  believe
that the  problems of the  world today would  all be solved  if we did
what it tells us to do in the Bible."

"What  about Lebanon?",  I  replied,"or  Northern Ireland?  You've got
different  Christian  sects  running  about  saying,  `My  way  or the
highway', and bumping each other off."

The  Corporal had  a condescending  smile on  his face  as he replied:
"That's just  the point! It says  right in the Bible,  `Thou shalt not
kill.'"

"It says  in the next  chapter to go  into Canaan and  kill everything
that you find there," I shot back.

"It does?"

"Yup."

I started to  leave at this point  , having reports to  be written. He
was rapidly leafing through his Bible to see if I was right. I grabbed
some papers from my briefcase and  started for the report writing room
door. He called after me: "Wait a minute. Do all of you non-Christians
use the affirmation thing?"

"Nope.  Some of us use the Chicken Oath."

"The WHAT?"

"The Chicken Oath."

The Corporal was starting to turn purple.  "This is a joke, right?"

I walked  over  to  my  briefcase  and  extracted  some papers from my
contingency  packet.  These  papers  were  excerpts  from  the British
Columbia Courts Operating Manual.  These excerpts listed the following
real and  legal oaths used by  the occasional Oriental who  ends up on
the witness stand in my province:

"7. CHINESE NON-CHRISTIAN OATHS:

"A)  PAPER OATH (Civil)

"The  witness  writes  his  name  on  a  piece  of paper and takes the
following oath while burning the  paper: `The evidence which you shall
give to the Court shall be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but
the truth, or your soul shall be consumed by fire as is this paper.'

"C)  SAUCER OATH ( Civil and Criminal)

"The witness, on  taking the stand, kneels down,  and the Clerk places
in his hand a China saucer whereupon the witness breaks it against the
box. The  Clerk then administers  the following oath,  `You shall tell
the truth,  the whole truth; the  saucer is cracked and  if you do not
tell the truth, your soul will be cracked like the saucer.'

"D) CHICKEN OATH (Civil and Criminal):

"The witness  is handed a piece  of paper with the  following writing:
`Oath made by (witness signs his  name). Being a true witness, I shall
enjoy happiness and my sons and  grandsons will prosper forever. `If I
give false evidence I shall die  on the street, earth will destroy me,
and I shall forever suffer in  adversity, and all my offspring will be
exterminated. In burning this Oath, I humbly submit myself to the Will
of  Heaven which  has brilliant  eyes to  see. The  _______year of the
Reign  of ______________  the day,  the _____________  Moon.' (witness
signs his name.)

"The  witness having  signed his  name twice,  and a  cock having been
procured, the Court (and Jury)  adjourns to a convenient place outside
the  building where  the full  ceremony of  administering the  oath is
performed. A block of wood, an axe  or knife, not less than three punk
sticks,  a pair  of candles   and Joss  paper being  obtained, Chinese
candles are stuck in the ground and lighted. The oath is then read out
loud by the witness, after which he  wraps it in Joss paper as used in
religious ceremonies. The witness then lays  the cock on the block and
chops its  head off, then sets  fire to the oath  from the candles and
holds it until it is consumed."

I've omitted  the criminal version of  the "paper oath" and  a "candle
oath", but you get the point. The  Corporal looked as if his world was
collapsing  around his  ears as  he read  this. I  suppose that he had
imagined that the  legal system was exclusively Christian  and that he
was surrounded by Christian officers at work.

"This is real?"

"That's affirmative."

"Seriously?"

"No sh*t."

I started to  leave again, but he  called to me one  last time. "Wait!
Wait! What do YOU believe in then?"

I paused in the doorway.  "You really want to know?"

"Yes."

"Objective, professional and fair police work."

"No! No! I mean what do you BELIEVE in?"

"Oh that."

"Yes."

"Mom."

"Pardon?"

"Mom."

"Your Mother?"

"Nope. Ours."

"I don't understand," he said, a thousand yard stare on his face.

"You  got  that  right,"  I  said  as  I  turned  and  left  the room.

Fortunately, not all Catholics are as  intolerant as this guy seems to
be. I wonder  what he'll do some day if  he makes Sergeant and someone
asks him to affirm an affidavit? Maybe they'll ask for a Chicken Oath.
That I'd like to see!

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