      F I D O N E W S         Volume 18, Number 08             19 Feb 2001
     +----------------------------+---------------------------------------+
     |  The newsletter of the     |   ISSN 1198-4589 Published by:        |
     |    FidoNet community       |   "FidoNews"                          |
     |          _                 |   1-714-639-0377     1:1/23           |
     |         /  \               |   1-714-532-1586     1:103/301        |
     |        /|oo \              |   BinkD supported both above          |
     |       (_|  /_)             |                                       |
     |        _`@/_ \    _        |                                       |
     |       |     | \   \\       |   Editor: Warren Bonner               |
     |       | (*) |  \   ))      |           editor@fidonews.org         |
     |       |__U__| /  \//       |           wdbonner@pacbell.net        |
     |        _//|| _\   /        |                                       |
     |       (_/(_|(____/         |                                       |
     |             (jm)           |   Newspapers should have no friends.  |
     |                            |                    -- JOSEPH PULITZER |
     +----------------------------+---------------------------------------+
     


                        Table of Contents
     1. HEADLINE  .................................................  1
     2. CHAT WITH THE EDITOR  .....................................  2
        ### Ol'WDB Column ###  ....................................  2
     3. GUEST EDITORIAL  ..........................................  4
        +++++ GUEST EDITORIAL +++++  ..............................  4
     4. ARTICLES  .................................................  6
        <<<<< IAN MOOTE ARTICLE >>>>>  ............................  6
     5. COLUMNS  .................................................. 10
        <<<<< FRANK'S COLUMN >>>>>  ............................... 10
     6. RECIPES  .................................................. 11
        +++ Yummm-Yumm +++  ....................................... 11
     7. GETTING TECHNICAL  ........................................ 12
        +>+>+> TECHNOSTUFF <+<+<+  ................................ 12
     8. POET'S CORNER  ............................................ 13
        ***** Poets Corner *****  ................................. 13
     9. HUMOR  .................................................... 15
        ><+>< HUMOR ><+><  ........................................ 15
     10. ADVERTISE YOUR FREE SERVICE/EVENT  ....................... 17
        < RECEIVED E-MAIL >  ...................................... 17
     11. NOTICES  ................................................. 18
        ((( NOTICES )))  .......................................... 18
     12. FIDONET BY INTERNET  ..................................... 19
     13. FIDONEWS INFORMATION  .................................... 24
        ***FIDONEWS INFORMATION***  ............................... 24
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 1                   19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                 HEADLINE
     =================================================================

     When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious
     privilege it is to be alive--to breathe, to think, to
     enjoy, to love.
                                            Marcus Aurelius




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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 2                   19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                           CHAT WITH THE EDITOR
     =================================================================


     Subject: SENIOR CITIZEN

     I'm the life of the party ...  even when it lasts until 8 p.m.

     I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.

     I'm usually interested in going home BEFORE I get to where I am going.

     I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, beano,
     antacid........

     I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.

     I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.

     I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a darn word you're
     saying.

     I'm very good at telling stories.....over and over and over and over.

     I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine.

     I'm so cared for: long term care, eye care, private care, dental
     care, VA Clinic care, and Vet's Cemetery awaiting....

     I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, children,
     politicians, and panhandlers on every corner...........

     I'm positive I did my part of the housework correctly before my mate
     retired.

     I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place, if I can't find
     it no one can.

     I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.

     I'm having trouble remembering simple words like.........

     I'm often looking in the refrigerator wondering what I was going to
     get.

     I get to the stair landing, and rest a moment, then try to remember if
     I'm going up or down stairs.

     I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies....

     I'm anti-everything now: anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise,
     anti-inflammatory, and anti-gravity for sure!

     I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.

     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 3                   19 Feb 2001


     I'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors......absolutely
     nothing!

     I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days, they all
     look like teenagers.

     I'm in the initial stage of my golden years: SS, CD's, IRA'S,
     AARP.....

     I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive
     at 150?

     I'm supporting all movements now ...  by eating bran, prunes, and
     raisins, supplemented with "Carter's Little Liver Pills".

     I'm a walking storeroom of facts..... just state anything and I
     will tell you what that reminds me of, and back when!

     I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN enjoying my second childhood and I think I am
     having the time of my life!!!!

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 4                   19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                              GUEST EDITORIAL
     =================================================================


     From: "Frank Vest" <flv@texoma.net>
     Date: Monday, February 12, 2001 10:26 PM

                     Is there a Fidonet Policy?
                           By Frank Vest


      It's been argued that Fidonet is governed by a Policy known as P4.
     It's been argued that Fidonet is organized by a Policy known as P4.
     It's been argued that Policy 4 (P4) is outdated. It's been argued that
     P4 should be done away with. It's been argued that P4 is the Policy of
     Fidonet and should be followed. It's been argued....

      Let's forget arguing for, against, the existence of, the need for,
     does it, should it, would it, could it and all that. Let's look at
     reality. Policy 4 exists. It is a document. It was the Policy of
     Fidonet. It's isn't the Policy of Fidonet anymore.

      WHAT!!  How can I say that P4 isn't the Policy of Fidonet?!?

      I'll answer that and prove it.

      Reality is that any Policy must be enforced in order to be a Policy.
     True, there may be occasions where a person will "slip" through Policy
     or violate Policy and get away with it. But, a Policy must be
     enforced. When a violation is discovered, action must be taken to
     correct or the Policy is nil. Violations of P4 are happening as this
     is being written. They are known and no correction has been taken.

      What violations, you ask?

      P4 states that to become a Node in Fidonet, one must read and agree
     to abide by Policy 4. There are those in Fidonet that have stated
     publicly, and even bragged, that they did not read nor agree to abide
     by P4 in order to get their Node number. In fact, there is a Region in
     Fidonet that, from the talk, will give a Node number to anyone that
     asks. Reading P4 and/or agreeing to abide by it doesn't matter. This
     is known and not corrected.

      P4 states that that a certain hour of each day be set aside for
     transfer of Netmail only. This is known as ZMH (Zone Mail Hour) and is
     coordinated to have each Node in Fidonet available for Netmail
     transfer at the same hour each day dependent on time zones. This is
     violated by Internet only Nodes since they aren't available for
     dial-up connections. It is further violated by others that allow
     transfer of other than Netmail during the ZMH. This is known and not
     corrected.

      I'm sure there are other violations that are know and ignored. The
     point is, that if P4 is ignored when desired and enforced when
     desired, it can not be a Policy for Fidonet and is no more than a
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 5                   19 Feb 2001


     document.

      So, where does that leave us?

      Simple. it leaves us without a Policy or any way to "govern" this
     organization except by the "cooperation" of the Nodes that are in
     Fidonet.

      I will be so bold as to state that, from this point on, there is no
     Policy for Fidonet. Each Node in Fidonet can create a Nodelist and
     submit it to anyone that is willing to incorporate it into their
     mailer's Nodelist compiler. Any Node that wishes to add another Node
     to Fidonet can do so by simply submitting a segment to anyone willing
     to accept. There are no ZCs, RCs, NCs or any other *Cs in Fidonet.
     Restrictions are non-existent and anyone can do anything that they
     please. If someone doesn't like what is being done by someone else,
     remove that person from "your" Nodelist. No Node can be denied a Node
     number for any reason no matter how valid, legal, illegal or whatever
     if someone is willing to add them to their Nodelist. Duplicate Node
     numbers?? Well, "Life's a bitch", complain to the non powers that be.

      Now, I'd suggest that some of the, still active, software authors get
     busy creating new software that will provide a "control" file to let
     Nodes filter out unwanted connections and such. Crash, Direct and
     other versions of Netmail will probably need work as well. The
     Fidonews is not controlled by any one person as Editor, so if you wish
     your own Fidonews, create it and distribute. Maybe a new software that
     will allow direct connects to the Internet for Netmail and, somehow,
     mesh the Fidonet Node addressing system to the Internet addressing
     system so that any person that has access to the Internet can get
     through to Fidonet Netmail. I'm sure that there are other things that
     will be available now that P4 is gone.

     Have fun. And remember, There are no rules unless you allow them.

     Regards,

     Frank

     Fidonet - 1:124/6308.1 Web Page - http://texoma.net/~flv/

                             ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~end~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 6                   19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                 ARTICLES
     =================================================================


     -------- Original Message --------
     Subject: FidoNews submission.
     Date: Tue, 13 Feb 2001 17:44:05 -0500
     From: Ian Moote <diogenes@nas.net>
     Organization: True Blue Computer Services
     To: editor@fidonews.org

              If You Could Make A Difference, Would You?
              ==========================================

     Nearly all of you can, but the statistics say that 97% of you won't
     and don't.

     I was inspired to write this "article" by one of those formula
     Judao-Christian "inspirational" stories that appears in the FidoNews
     nearly every week.  Specifically, it was the story in volume 18 number
     3 about the boy with leukemia who, with his dying breath, asks the
     firechief if he's a fireman yet.

     That's so sad, eh?  Quite the tear-jerker.  Oh well.  He's dead.  Next
     message.

     Awww -- did that offend you?

     Don't worry about it.  This kid probably never existed anyway.

     But there are _real_ leukemia patients out there who _are_ dying, and
     many of them are children.  What would be your reaction if you
     discovered that you could save the lives of _real_ leukemia patients!?
     YOU!  And what if that would only cost you one to three hours of your
     personal time every month?

     If you're like the lower 97% of the general population then please
     save yourself some time and just skip to the next article / message.
     If you consider yourself a member of the top 3% of the population then
     you may find something of interest within.


     Leukemia --------

     Leukemia is a cancer of the bone marrow and blood.  We all know what
     bone marrow is but few people realize that bone marrow is actually a
     body organ, just like the heart, liver, or spleen.  Bone marrow is
     responsible for producing a number of the components of our blood,
     such as the red cells which carry oxygen throughout our bodies, the
     white cells which fight infection, and the platelets which clot blood.

     When the bone marrow becomes cancerous it begins to uncontrollably
     produce malformed and functionless cells.  Yes, this is a bad thing
     and you do eventually die from it.

     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 7                   19 Feb 2001


     The prefered method of treatment seems to be to poison the diseased
     person.  Toxins are injected into the body in an attempt to kill off
     the malignant marrow cells.  The goal of treatment is to force the
     cancer into "remission".  If the cancer remains in remission for a
     number of years then the patient is considered "cured".

     In severe cases sometimes the leukemia patient doesn't have enough
     healthy marrow left to be treated successfully.  In this case the only
     option is to kill off _all_ of the bone marrow in the diseased person
     and replace it with healthy bone marrow.  This replacement bone marrow
     comes from a healthy human donor.  The problem is that bone marrow,
     being an organ, is easily rejected by the body and so a great deal of
     care must be taken to find an appropriate donor.  The most likley
     donors, IIRC, are blood siblings.  The next most likely are people
     from your blood family, the closer the better, then from your
     community/country.  The farther removed from you, genetically, a
     potential donor is the less likely it will be that he will be able to
     provide an acceptable marrow donation.  It is rare to find a potential
     "match" outside of one's ethnic group.


     Unrelated Bone Marrow Donations -------------------------------

     And this is where that 97% of you come in.  The Red Cross keeps a
     registry of potential bone marrow donors which it calls the "Unrelated
     Bone Marrow Donor Registry".  The procedure to be entered into the
     registry varies depending where you are.  Up here in Canada the Red
     Cross (now the Canadian Blood Services) likes to see you make several
     whole-blood donations before they register you as a potential donor.
     When you want to become registered then you need to provide a seperate
     blood sample for screening.  This initial screening establishes your
     HLA's and other factors which are used to determine potential matches.

     At this point only enough information is obtained to determine if you
     are a _potential_ candidate for any particular marrow transplant.  If
     you are ever actually selected as a potential match then you will be
     called upon to provide one more sample so that it can be determined
     whether you are an actual match to the potential recipient.


     The realities of bone marrow donation are:

     1. Chances of a match are so rare that you'll probably never be called
     even as a potential match.  IIRC, there's only a 1:4 chance of you
     being able to provide acceptable bone marrow for your own blood
     sibling.

     2. The operation to actually extract the healthy marrow from the donor
     is apparently somewhat painful.

     3. More than one donation may be necessary before the patient's body
     accepts your marrow.

     4. If you're ever called upon then it may be necessary to put your
     life, family, and job on hold in order to provide the donation.
     Generally speaking you and the recipient will be in adjacent operating
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 8                   19 Feb 2001


     rooms at the time of donation, and because matches are so rare it is
     conceivable that you may have to travel half-way around the world to
     make your donation.

     5. After all is said and done it may turn out that your marrow just
     isn't a close-enough match and the recipient repeatedly rejects it. As
     matches are so rare this will almost always result in the inevitable
     death of the recipient.


     Plateletapheresis -----------------

     But bone marrow donation is an extreme scenario.  Leukemia is usually
     treated with chemotherapy.  "Chemo" kills off much / most of the bone
     marrow, but not all of it.  The idea is that the malignant marrow will
     likely be killed off and that any surviving marrow will be healthy.

     This treatment usually works, but is not without its side-effects.
     Killing off the bone marrow results in reduced production of red,
     white, and platelet cells.  Platelets are the cells which clot the
     blood and stop you from bleeding to death whenever you get a paper
     cut.  Because of their reduced platelet production, chemo patients
     require platelet transfusions to maintain their platelet count.

     These platelets can be taken from whole blood donations, but that can
     be somewhat wasteful as it requires four units of blood to produce one
     unit of platelets.  Other components of the blood will be used for
     other purposes, but it's rare for all the separated components to be
     used.  A more efficient method of obtaining platelets is from
     dedicated platelet donors.

     Platelet donation is a lot like giving blood.  The only real
     difference is that it's a lot more time-consuming.  In a platelet
     donation only the platelets are extracted from your blood using a
     centrifuge.  Your blood, minus the extracted platelets, is returned to
     your body.  Your body replaces platelets so quickly that you can
     donate platelets every ten days.  Such a small proportion of platelets
     are extracted that your body doesn't even miss them.  Some donors
     regularly make double donations, depending on circumstances.  (Just as
     an example, double-donations are common around Christmas time).

     The only real problem with donating platelets is, as previously
     mentioned, the amount of time required.  You can be hooked up to the
     centrifuge for 1.5 to 2 hours at a time.  After you consider travel
     and sign-in time you're usually talking about three hours altogether.
     The Red Cross makes every attempt to spread donations across as many
     donors as possible.  If you have a fairly common blood type and are
     CMV+ then it would be a bit unusual for you to be called more than
     once a month.

     Platelet donations have a short shelf life.  Platelets are harvested
     on an "as needed" basis for specific patients.  Platelet donations,
     therefore, are much more serious than whole-blood donations.  While
     both are certainly important, whole-blood donations (except for
     autologous, O-, or other special donation types) generally go into the
     general blood supply once they're processed; one disqualified unit of
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 9                   19 Feb 2001


     whole-blood is not normally missed.  If you miss, cancel, or are
     disqualified from a platelet donation then a leukemia patient will
     quite possibly not receive his or her treatment.

     If you can donate blood then you can donate platelets.  The screening
     and qualification process is no different.


     Whole Blood Donations ---------------------

     If you don't have the time or the bladder-control to donate platelets
     then donate whole blood!  Most North Americans will require human
     blood products at some time in their lives, but only 3% of the
     population donates blood (a statistic which personally doesn't
     surprise me in the least).

     Qualifications:  Very basically, 18 - 60 years of age, fairly healthy,
     not a homosexual or bisexual male, no familial history of
     Creutzfeld-Jacob disease, not an IV drug user, not a recipient of
     blood products or dura mater grafts.  Yes they take smokers and women
     who have had children.  [:)  You can donate a unit of blood every 56
     days.  (Just consider:  in the time it takes one person to donate one
     unit of blood, a platelet donor has donated up to five units of
     platelets and _saved_ twenty units of whole-blood for other uses!)



     So the next time you read one of those inspirational tear-jerkers in
     the FidoNews, stop and ask yourself how you spent your free time
     today. Answer yourself honestly.  Then take that answer and use it to
     determine whether you fit into the 97% who stand by and wank, or the
     3% for whom lip service is just not enough.

     "If you could make a difference, would you?"


     Ian Moote 1:244/140


     * Disclaimier:  The author is not a doctor or nurse, and is not in the
     employ or affiliated with the Red Cross or the Canadian Blood
     Services. The information provided is from the author's own personal
     experience and recollection and is provided as introductory
     information only.

                         ~~~~~~~~~~end~~~~~~~~~~



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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 10                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                  COLUMNS
     =================================================================


                     By: Frank Vest <flv@texoma.net>

                             It's a Web Page
                                    Or:
                            Fidonet Statistics
                               By Frank Vest


     In playing Reporter for the Fidonews, I'll take topics for many places
     and search for them if need be. This one came across my desk from a
     friend and I thank him for pointing me at it. :)

     There has been chatter, discussion and even some down right bickering
     about statistics in Fidonet. Sometimes it over how many did what, who
     wants this versus that and such. Sometimes it's interesting to me,
     sometimes not. One topic that might be of interest to many is the
     growth/decline of Fidonet through the years.

     I'm not sure if this Web Page was designed with this purpose in mind,
     but I found it interesting just the same. Point your Web Browser to
     "http://goodolddaysbbs.etowns.net/fidonet.htm" and look this over. The
     page is not fancy, but it does track the growth and decline of Fidonet
     from the beginning to current year.  The stats are gathered and sorted
     into Zones and there is even a percentage of growth/decline section.
     Where possible, the Nodelist from as close to the first of each year
     tracked was used. In some cases, that wasn't possible and a later
     Nodelist was used. This is noted in the stats.

     One of the things I found interesting was that between the year 1984
     and 1985, Fidonet actually lost a couple of Nodes. Imagine that! :-)

     Ok, I'll shut up now and let you get to this page. Remember:
     http://goodolddaysbbs.etowns.net/fidonet.htm

     With best regards,

     Frank

     Fidonet - 1:124/6308.1
     Web Page - http://texoma.net/~flv/

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 11                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                  RECIPES
     =================================================================

     By: David Pileggi
     To: Public
     Re: Hushpuppies
     ----------------------------------------------------------------------
                                HUSHPUPPIES


      Qty   Measurement       Ingredient
     ___--  ----------------  ----------------------------------------
     1-1/2  cup               cornmeal
         1  cup               flour
         3                    eggs, beaten
         1                    onion, grated
     2-1/2  cups              milk, hot
         1  cup               corn kernels
         2  tsp               baking powder
         1                    red pepper, chopped
         2  Tbsps             jalapeno pepper, chopped
     1-1/2  cups              cheddar cheese, grated
         2  Tbsps             butter, melted
                              oil (for frying)


       In a mixing bowl, combine the cornmeal and flour.  Add the
     beaten eggs to the cornmeal mixture.  Stir. Add the onion, milk,
     corn, baking powder, red pepper, and jalapeno pepper.  Stir.  Add
     the cheddar cheese and melted butter.  Blend well to form a stiff
     batter.

       In a pot, heat enough cooking oil to fry the hushpuppies.  Drop
     the batter into the hot oil by the spoonful.  Fry until golden
     brown.  Drain on paper towels.


     Recipe from:  "Roger's Cajun Cookbook" by Vernon Roger, published
                      1987

      * Origin: The World Within (1:106/4725)

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 12                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                             GETTING TECHNICAL
     =================================================================


     Sorry folks, no sources for this section this week...

     ED.
                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 13                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                               POET'S CORNER
     =================================================================

                      ***** DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL *****

     Her hair up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow
     Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go

     But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home
     Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone

     But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say
     What to tell her classmates, on this special Daddy's Day

     But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone
     And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home

     But the little girl went to school, eager to tell then all
     About a dad she never sees, a dad who never calls.

     There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet
     Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats

     One by one the teacher called, a student from the class
     To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed

     At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare
     Each of them were searching, for a man who wasn't there

     "Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out
     "She probably doesn't have one," another dared to shout

     And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say "Looks like
     another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day."

     The words did not offend her, as she smiled at her friends
     And looked back at her teacher,who gently told her to begin

     And with hands behind her back, she slowly began to speak
     And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique

     "My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away
     But I know he wishes he could be with me on this very day

     And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know
     All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so

     He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike
     He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite

     We used to share fudge sundaes and ice cream in a cone
     And though you cannot see him, I'm not standing all alone

     'Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart
     I know because he told me, he's forever here in my heart"
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 14                  19 Feb 2001


     With that her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest
     Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress

     And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears
     Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years

     And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the
     crowd She finished with a voice so soft, but it's message clear
     and loud

     "I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star
     And if he could he'd be here, but heaven's just too far

     But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away."
     And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day

     And to her mother's amazement, she witnessed with surprise
     A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their
     eyes

     Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt
     inside Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side.

     "I know that you're here with me" to the silence she called out
     And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with
     doubt

     Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had
     just been closed....

     But there placed on her desktop, was a beautiful, fragrant pink
     rose

     And a child was blessed,if only a moment, by the love of her
     shining bright star...

     And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far.

                                               anonymous

                          ~~~~~~~~~~end~~~~~~~~~~




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     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 15                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                   HUMOR
     =================================================================


     Customer:  This coffee tastes like mud!
     Waitress:  Well, it was ground this morning.
     ~~~
     Bumped into Bill Clinton on the street outside McDonalds this
     morning... I said " Pardon Me", to which he replied, "it'll cost ya!".
     ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

     The Meaning of words:

     Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly
     Gates.

     St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys in now, but our computer's
     down. You'll have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can't
     go back as humans.  What'll it be?"

     The first priest says, "I've always wanted to be an eagle, soaring
     above the Rocky mountains."

     "So be it," says St. Peter, and off flies the first priest.

     The second priest mulls this over for a moment and asks, "Will any of
     this week 'count', St. Peter?"

     "No, I told you the computer's down.  There's no way we can keep track
     of what you're doing.  The week's a freebie."

     "In that case," says the second priest, "I've always wanted to be a
     stud."

     "So be it," says St. Peter, and the second priest disappears.

     A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to
     recall the two priests.  "Will you have any trouble locating them?" he
     asks.

     "The first one should be easy," says St. Peter.  "He's somewhere over
     the Rockies, flying with the eagles.  But the second one could prove
     to be more difficult."

     "Why?" asketh the Lord.

     St. Peter answered, "He's on a snow tire, somewhere in North Dakota."

                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


     A retired gentleman went into the Social Security office to apply for
     benefits. After waiting in line a long time he got to the counter. The
     woman behind the counter asked him for his drivers license to verify
     his age.
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 16                  19 Feb 2001


     He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home.
     He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left
     his wallet at home. "Will I have to go home and come back now?" he
     asks.

     The woman says, "No, just unbutton your shirt."

     So he opens his shirt revealing lots of curly silver hair on his
     chest.

     She says, "That is proof enough for me," and she processed his Social
     Security application.

     When he gets home, the man excitedly tells his wife about his
     experience at the Social Security office.

     She said, "You should have dropped your pants, you might have
     qualified for Disability, too."

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     HORSE SENSE

     A horse can't pull while kicking.
        This fact I merely mention.
     And he can't kick while pulling,
        Which is my chief contention.

     Let's imitate the good old horse
        And lead a life that's fitting;
     Just pull an honest load, and then
        There'll be no time for kicking.

                                     Anonymous

                   ***************

     OUR LIPS AND EARS

     If you your lips would keep from slips,
        Five things observe with care:
     Of whom you speak, to whom you speak,
        And how and when and where.

     If your ears would save from jeers,
        These things keep meekly hid:
     Myself and I, and mine and my,
        And how I do and did.

                                         Anonymous

                       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~end~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



     -----------------------------------------------------------------
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 17                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                     ADVERTISE YOUR FREE SERVICE/EVENT
     =================================================================


     By: Albano De Manuel
     To: Warren Bonner
     Re: WELL oK!
     ----------------------------------------------------------------------
     Hola Warren!

     El S bado 10 Febrero 2001 a las 12:00, Warren Bonner escribi  a David
     Gonzalez:

      The idea is perfect but the translation is bad, you understand
     everything whenyou read it but that Spanish is very sad :( I can't
     make the translations always but if you ever need any translation into
     Spanish tell me and I'll do ;)Hey, the idea is good ;)

     Saludos desde Pucela,

     Albano de Manuel <-> albanodm@adenet.es FidoNET ........ 2:348/105.106
     FiC BBS telnet://ceu.fi.udc.es:4444 FidoNET .......... 2:341/14.91
     http://conecta2.thebbs.org/pucela_bbs Noticias BBS, FidoNet, Soft Fido

     ...   Castilla y Leon, un solo corazon ! ... Tadj Mahall 1.1 ---
     FMailX 1.40g * Origin: -=> Rafa STD <> telnet://213.96.212.205 <>
     91.5447282 (2:341/14.91)

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~END~~~~~~~~~~~~


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 18                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                                  NOTICES
     =================================================================


     Subject: FidoTel
     Date: Mon, 12 Feb 2001 11:50:59 -0500
     From: IS1 Talley <ltalley@anzio.navy.mil>
     To: "'editor@fidonews.org'" <editor@fidonews.org>

     Hi Warren,

     Would you mind posting the following in Fido News please?
     ---------------------------------------------------

     To all users and mail movers that access FidoTel: Unfortunately,
     FidoTel (www.fidotel.com <http://www.fidotel.com> , ftp.fidotel.com
     <ftp://ftp.fidotel.com> , telnet.fidotel.com, binkp.fidotel.com) went
     down approximately 2 weeks ago (by the time you read this).  This is a
     temporary problem and will be repaired on or before March 5th.  An
     unforeseen problem has likely caused my ISP to crash the connection. I
     am unable to service the repairs at the moment due to my obligations
     while serving the U.S. Navy and currently operating at sea.  Details
     will certainly be forthcoming through FidoTel internal bulletins once
     the system is operational.  I apologize for the inconvenience.  I
     would also like to start a petition to have a public execution of
     "Murphy" who has obviously taken residence in my home during my
     absence.

     Shannon Talley
     1:275/311
                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     By: David Gonzalez
      > e-mail.......: davegh@tutopia.com http://skynetbbs.8m.com
      >                sysop@skynetbbs.8m.com
      >                FidoNet......: 4:930/1
      >                4:930/0 NC:930,
      >                4:93/0  RC:93
      >                Telnet.......: skynetbbs.thebbs.org
      > =============================================================
      >  * Origin: SkyNet BBS FidoNet: 4:930/0 Telnet:
      > skynetbbs.thebbas.org (4:930/1)

                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 19                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                            FIDONET BY INTERNET
     =================================================================

     ------------------------------------------------------
     *Fidonet-related sites

                       . -- -- -- -- --- -- -- -- -- .
                       |    FIDONET-RELATED SITES    |
                       ` -- -- -- -- --- -- -- -- -- '
                          Last update:  February 7, 2000

     FidoNet
     Homepage:     http://www.fidonet.org
     FidoNews:     http://www.fidonews.org   [HTML]
                   ftp://ftp.nwstar.com/fidonet/fidonews/
                   ftp://ftp.sstar.com/fidonet/fnews/
     Echolist:     http://www.baltimoremd.com/echolist/
     Echomail links: http://www.osirusoft.com/fidonet/fidoip.html
     SDS Files:    http://fidobbs.dk/download (Web Access to SDS)
     FTSC page:    http://www.ftsc.org/
     General:      http://www.writebynight.com/fidonet.html

     Zone 1:       http://www.z1.fidonet.org
       Region 10:  http://www.r10.org
         Net 102   http://home.earthlink.net/~kayshapero/net102.htm
         Net 103:  http://www.webworldinc.com/club103/
         Net 203:  http://www.geocities.com/Area51/8687/net203index.html
       Region 11:  http://oeonline.com/~garyg/region11/
        Net 2410:  http://www.vector.11.com/net2410/
       Region 12:  http://sparkys.dyndns.org
       Region 13:  http://www.net264.org/r13.htm
         Net 264:  http://www.net264.org/
         Net 275:  http://www.homershut.net/~mahoover/net275/
       Region 14:  http://www.ouijabrd.com/region14
         Net 282:  http://www.rxn.com/~net282/
       Region 15:  <vacant>
       Region 16:  <vacant>
       Region 17:  http://www.region17.net
         Net 140:  http://www.nwstar.com/~net140
       Region 18:  http://techshop.pdn.net/fido/

       Region 19:  http://bise.tzo.com/r19
         Net 124:  http://www.dallasinet.com/net124
                   http://texoma.net/~flv
         Net 130:  http://www.startext.net/homes/net130
         Net 393:  http://www.chatter.com/~wb/

     Zone 2:       http://www.z2.fidonet.org
                   ftp://ftp.sstar.com/fidonet/zone2 (Z2 nodelists etc.)
       Region 20:  http://www.fidonet.pp.se (in Swedish)
       Region 23:  http://www.fido.dk (in Danish)

       Region 24:  http://www.swb.de/personal/flop/gatebau.html (German)
                   http://www.was-ist-fido.de/
         Fido-IP:  http://home.nrh.de/fido/ (English/German)
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 20                  19 Feb 2001


       Region 25:  http://www.literary.freeserve.co.uk/net2502/
       Region 26:  http://www.nemesis.ie
          REC 26:  http://www.nrgsys.com/orb
       Region 27:  http://telematique.org/ft/r27.htm
       Region 29:  http://www.rtfm.be/fidonet/  (French)
                   http://Welcome.to/skynetbbs/
       Region 30:  http://www.fidonet.ch  (German)
     ? Region 33:  http://www.fidoitalia.net  (Italian)
       Region 34:  http://www.pobox.com/cnb/r34.htm  (Spanish)
           REC34:  http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/4552/
       Region 36:  http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/7207/
       Region 38:  http://public.st.carnet.hr/~blagi/bbs/adriam.html
       Region 41:  http://www.fidonet.gr (Greek/English)
       Region 42:  http://www.fido.cz
     !    Net422:  http://www.fido.sk (Slovak/English)
       Region 50:  http://www.fido7.com/  (Russian)
        Net 5010:  http://fido.tu-chel.ac.ru/  (Russian)
        Net 5015:  http://www.fido.nnov.ru/  (Russian)
        Net 5028:  HTTP://5028.nordnet.ru/
        Net 5030:  http://kenga.ru/fido/  (Russian & English)
        Net 5049:  http://www.n5049.z2.fidonet.org  (English/Russian)
        Net 5074:  http://www.z2.n5074.fidonet.net
     ??  Net 5085:  http://www.fidonet.uz/ (Russian)

     Zone 3:       http://www.z3.fidonet.org

     Zone 4:
       Region 80:  http://fidobrasil.8m.com  (Portuguese)
       Region 90:
         Net 904:  http://members.tripod.com/~net904 (Spanish)

     Zone 5:       http://www.eastcape.co.za/fidonet/

     Zone 6:       http://www.z6.fidonet.org
       Region 65:  http://www.cfido.com/fidonet/cfidochina.html
                   (Chinese)


                          Fidonet Via Internet Hubs

     See also: http://www.osirusoft.com/fidoip.html

     a @ preceding an individual's name implies a virtual email
     address. The email is translated as follows
     firstlast@osirusoft.com will automatically route to the
     appropriate individual's email.  Anyone in this list will
     also receive routed notice of this feature.  In my case, it
     would still be joejared@osirusoft.com, but you get the idea.

     Also, as information is provided to me, I will be adding a
     latency field to each node, which is defined as the maximum
     time between when the message is received, and when it is
     sent on to other nodes, or available to be sent onward,
     defined in minutes. A latency of ! implies that there is an
     immediate response, and an attempt to deliver immediately
     after processing, or a "MinuteMail System", as it were.
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 21                  19 Feb 2001


                v-email flag firstnamelastname@osirusoft.com
                | email address or
     Node#      | Operator          | Facilities (*) | Speed,| Basic Rate
                |                   |                |latency|
     -----------+-------------------+----------------+-------+------------
     Zone 1     |                   |                |       |
       10/3     | Brenda Donovan    | FTP,UUE,BinkP  | 384K,30| n/c
       10/345   @ Todd Cochrane     | FTP,BinkP,VMOT | T1,!  | n/c
       13/25    @ Jim Balcom        | FTP            | 56k   | $20mo.
       18/500   @ Ross Cassell      | FTP, BinkP     |128K+,!| n/c
      103/5     @ Mark Luetger      | BinkP          | 384k,!| n/c
      103/153   @ Michael Box       | BinkP          | aDSL,!| n/c
      103/301   @ Joe Jared         | BinkP,FTP,NFS  | 384k,!| n/c
      103/401   @ Warren Bonner     | BinkP          | aDSL,!| n/c
      105/8     | Russ Johnson      | FTP,BinkP,VMoT | 384k  | n/c
      105/72    @ Larry James       | FTP, BinkP     | aDSL  | $50/yr
      106/1     @ Steve Loupe       | BinkP, FTP     | 128k  | ???
      106/6018  | Lawrence Garvin   | FTP, VMoT      | aDSL,60| n/c
      107/453   @ Jeffrey Estevez| FTP,BinkP,VMoT,UUE| 56k,60| $10 mo.
      140/1     @ Bob Seaborn       | FTP,BinkP      | T3,30 | $5/$16
      167/133   | Stephen Monteith  | BinkP          | 128k+ | n/c
      211/417   @ Korombos          | BinkP,UUE,FTP  | T1    | n/c
      220/10    | groberts@nexusbbs.net |BinkP,FTP,UUE|1.5M+ | n/c
      218/109   @ Matt Munson       | BinkP,UUE      | 33.6k | n/c
      246/160   @ Mason Vye         | FTP, UUE       | 56K   | n/c
      249/116   | Carl Austin Bennett | FTP, UUE    |ADSL,60 | n/c
      280/169   | Brian Greenstreet | FTP            | 33.6  | $2mo.
      342/3     @ Richard Dodsworth | BinkP,FTP      | 128K+ | n/c
      395/670   | Arthur Stark      | BinkD,FTP      | CABLE | n/c
      379/1     @ Dale Ross         | FTP, BinkP,UUE | 256K+,! n/c
      396/1     @ John Souvestre    | FTP,VMoT       | T1,10 | $5/mo
      396/45    | Marc Lewis        | UUE            | 33.6  | $26/yr
      396/48    | Ben Ritchey       | UUE:BFDS       | 33.6k | n/c
     2604/104   @ Jim Mclaughlin    | FTP,VMoT,UUE   | 33.6  | $1mo
     2613/404   @ David Moufarrege  | BinkP,FTP,VMoT | 128k+,!| n/c
     2624/306   | David Calafrancesco  | VMoT        | 33.6  | n/c
     3407/4     @ jyates@bsdi.ldl.net | UUE,FTP            | 28.8  | n/c
     3632/84    | Robert Todd    |FTP,VMoT,UUE,BinkP | 57.6k | n/c
     3651/9     @ Jerry Gause       | FTP,VMoT       | 33.6  | $3/$6
     --------------------------------------------------------------
     Zone 2     |
       20/11    | Henrik Lindhe     | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
       31/1     | Gabriel Plutzar   | BinkP          | T1+   | n/c
      203/600   | Mikael Karlsson   | UUE            | 64k   | n/c
      221/360   @ Tommi Koivula     | BinkP,UUE      | ???   | n/c
      236/205   @ Michael Kaaber    | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      246/2098  | Volker Imre       | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      280/1601  @ Jeroen VanDeLeur  | FTP,UUE        | 64k   | n/c
      292/620   | Eddy Missoul      | VMoT, UUE,BinkP| 64k   |N/C
      292/624   | Steven Leeman     | UUE          | 64k     | N/C
      292/907   | Bart Verhaeghe    | BinkP,VMoT,UUE | 64K   | n/c
      292/2003  | Eric Vaneberck    | BinkP          | 768k  | n/c
      301/1     | Peter Witschi     | BinkP          | 768k  | n/c
      332/807   | Roberto Mascolo   | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      335/535   @ Mario Mure        | BinkP,VMot,UUE | 64k   | n/c
      335/610   | Gino Lucrezi      | UUE            | 33.6  | n/c
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 22                  19 Feb 2001


      344/201   | Julio Garcia      | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      346/3     @ Carlos Navarro    | UUE            | ???   | n/c
      382/100   | Sinisa Burina     | BinkP,ifcico   | ???   | n/c
      406/555   | Ofir Michaeli &   | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      406/555   | Marius Kaizerman  | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      423/81    | Milos Bajer       | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
      465/204   | Va Milushnikov    | BinkP          | 33.6k | n/c
      469/84    | Max Masyutin      | VMoT           | 256k  | n/c
      480/112   | Adam Sarapata| FTP, VMoT, UUE,BinkP| 128k  | n/c
      550/4077  | Serguei Trouchelle| UUE            | ----- | n/c
     2411/413   @ Dennis Dittrich   | UUE,BinkP      | 64k   | n/c
     2446/301   @ Lothar Behet      | BinkP,VMoT,UUE,FTP | 64K   | n/c
     2474/275   | Christian Emig    | UUE            | 64k   | unkn
     5030/115   | Andrey Podkolzin  | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
     5100/8     | Egons Bush        | BinkP          | ???   | n/c
     5020/1159  | Gennady Kudryashoff | UUE          | 33.6  | n/c
     --------------------------------------------------------------
     Zone 3
      633/260   @ Malcolm Miles     | FTP,BinkP      | 64K   | n/c
      640/954   | Rick Van Ruth     | FTP,VMot,UUE,BinkP| 56K| n/c
      774/605   @ Barry Blackford|BinkP,VMoT:10023,ifcico,FTP |33.6| n/c

     --------------------------------------------------------------
     Zone 4
      801/161   @ Renato Zambon     | UUE            | 33.6  |n/c
      905/100   | Fabian Gervan     | VMoT,UUE,BinkP | 128k  | n/c
      902/18    | Javier Tejedor    | UUE            | 33,6  | n/c

     --
     * FTP   = Internet File Transfer Protocol
     * VMoT  = Virtual Mailer over Telnet (various)
     * UUE   = uuencode<->email type transfers
     * BinkP = front end mailer for TCPIP networks
     * NFS   = Linux Networking
     ----------------------------------------------
     Fidonet oriented news servers

     news.osirusoft.com
     news.tardis.net

     Fidonet oriented chat rooms.

     room #fidonet  5PM (PDT 11AM GMT) Sundays
     irc.osirusoft.com  (Peers wanted)

     ----------------------------------------------

     Please send updates, corrections and suggestions to
     Joe Jared, 1:103/301, joejared@osirusoft.com.  All email addresses
     here for purpose of corresponding with fidonet members about
     obtaining a feed.  Improper use of the virtual email addresses, and
     most especially, email addressed to blockme@relays.osirusoft.com
     will be considered a request to be blocked by my open relay spam
     stopper at http://relays.osirusoft.com


     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 23                  19 Feb 2001


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 24                  19 Feb 2001


     =================================================================
                           FIDONEWS INFORMATION
     =================================================================


     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --  FIDONEWS STAFF - -- -- -- -- -- -- +
     |                                                             |
     | Editor:     Warren D. Bonner, 1:1/23, editor@fidonews.org   |
     | Webmaster:  Jim Barchuk, jb@fidonews.org                    |
     | Columnist:  Joe Jared, 1:103/0, joejared@osirusoft.com      |
     |             (Fido Via Internet Hubs column)                 |
     | Columnist:  Ol' WDB, 1:103/401, fidonews@netscape.net       |
     | Humor:      Chuckles & Grins, emailed to editor             |
     | Sites Bio:  Frank Vest, 1:124/6308.1                        |
     |             (The best site of the week)                     |
     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- +

     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -  EDITORS EMERITI - -- -- -- -- -- -- +
     |                                                             |
     |       Tom Jennings, Thom Henderson, Dale Lovell, Vince      |
     |       Perriello, Tim Pozar, Sylvia Maxwell, Donald Tees,    |
     |       Christopher Baker, Zorch Frezberg, Henk Wolsink,      |
     |       Doug Meyers                                           |
     |                                                             |
     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- +

     "Fido", "FidoNet" and the dog-with-diskette are U.S. registered
     trademarks of Tom Jennings, P.O. Box 410923, San Francisco, CA
     94141, and are used with permission.

     Fidonews is published weekly by and for the members of Fidonet.
     Fidonews is Copyright (C) 2000 by Warren Bonner, though authors
     retain rights to their contributed articles.  Opinions expressed
     by theauthors is strictly their own.  Noncommercial duplication
     and distribution within Fidonet is encouraged.  Authors are
     encouraged to send their articles in ASCII text to:
     Warren Bonner at one of his addresses above.


     The weekly edition of Fidonews is distributed through the file
     area FIDONEWS, and is published as echomail in the echo FIDONEWS.
     These sources are normally available through your Network
     Coordinator. The current and past issues are also available from
     the following sources:

     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -  FIDONEWS AVAILABILITY - -- -- -- -- -- -- +
     |                                                                |
     |         Freq FIDONEWS @ 1:140/1, or 1:396/1                    |
     |         ftp://ftp.sstar.com/fidonet/fnews/                     |
     |         ftp://ftp.nwstar.com/fidonet/fidonews/                 |
     |         http://www.fidonews.org                                |
     |         email subscription: majordomo@fidonews.org             |
     |                         (subject: help body: list)             |
     |         ftp mail: ftpmail@fidonews.org (subject: help)         |
     |                                                                |
     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- +
     FIDONEWS 18-08               Page 25                  19 Feb 2001


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

