This story is a narrative taken from a transcript of an interview with a 34-year-old divorced mother.  It contains graphic, explicit descriptions of illicit sexual activity.  You will understand why this woman wishes to have her identity withheld.

Zone Master

------ Chapter 1 ------

I couldn't help myself.  I kicked my cheating-ass husband out of the house and filed for divorce after I caught him fucking the babysitter.  And it didn't happen just once.  We had been married 13 years and have an 11-year-old daughter. When I first married him, I would never have used the word "fuck", and I didn't like him to use it.  I preferred the phrase "making love".  Even saying "having sex" was better.  But there was no other word for what he was doing, and that was fucking the damned 19-year-old babysitter!  After I kicked him out and then he moved in with one of his female co-workers, I found that he had been fucking her to!  I had no idea at the time.  But as I reflect back on the events of the last six months, I am still not sure which way is which.  I do know that I have learned a lot about myself since then, though I am still not sure exactly what to make of things.  From loneliness and hurt to self exploration to the Internet, I have learned that I am not alone, that life has many twists and turns, many choices, and many options.

I've been on the Internet in the past few months; I've seen what kind of kinky things are out there.  I can just hear it now, what many of you are thinking.  Some would say, "Join him, and make it a threesome."  Others might say, "Fine, get your own young stud on the side."  So many options, but I didn't feel like any of those.  I thought we had a good marriage, and I intended on us being faithful to each other.

Oh, don't think I haven't thought about finding a hot young stud, with a large cock and lots of stamina (I would never have talked like that 13 years ago!).  Heck, I've thought about it all.  I've seen what the Internet has to offer.  I have looked at a lot of options.  I thought about playing the field, doing the dating scene, putting out a personal ad, going out, all those things.  I thought about finding a sugar daddy, an older (I'm 34) wealthy man whose wife doesn't give him what he wants.  I've thought about going out and letting myself get picked up by an attractive stranger.  But none of that appealed to me.  Don't get me wrong, I still want companionship, and I love and want sex.  I just didn't want the negatives that came with any of those ideas.

So, instead of focusing on the negative of my cheating ex, and instead of finding a new partner so soon, my daughter Kimmy and I have become best buds.  Here we are Kimmy and I, just the two of us.  She had felt rejected by her dad moving in with another woman, and became more quiet and withdrawn, but that was changing.  We've spent a lot of time together the last 3 months.  Walks in the park, "girl" movies at home on the sofa, fun times at "family" restaurants.  We go out on dates, but instead of a romantic restaurant, we get pizza or a burger, and then we might go to that chick-flick, or I could take her to the fun & games hangout, play mini-golf, or just walk the mall.  Fun things.  Mother/daughter kind of things.  At least, until I started showing.

But I am getting ahead of myself.  Two weeks after I kicked the jerk out, I found out that I was pregnant again.  Great timing!  Even though I have only one daughter, I was pregnant one other time, but had a miscarriage.  SO, not only am I a single mom now, I am a *pregnant* single mom.  What a loser.  How many people are going to think that I am the one who cheated?  That my ex left me because I got knocked up by whoever-it-was that I was having an affair with?  Trust me; I have only had sex with my ex.  It's "his" baby.  At this point I almost wish it were someone else's.  At least then it might have a daddy.  Kimmy had a hard enough time with me kicking her dad out, and then finding out that he was having an affair with two other women.  Why does an 11-year-old have to go through that?  Now I would have to explain to my little sweetheart that Mommy is going to have another baby, even though daddy has been gone.  It's hard enough for a married woman.  

After a miscarriage, you get kind of gun-shy.  You get your hopes up.  All your friends congratulate you, at least they did when I was married; I didn't even want to face them, now.  Even strangers smile at you.  And then, bam, you lose the baby, and not only are you heartbroken, your friends are at a loss of what to say.  Here's a tip.  You don't have to say anything.  Just drop by, and bring me a movie and some take-out food.  Sit on the sofa with me and watch a romantic comedy or even an action-adventure movie with me.  Be my friend.  Just be there, that's all.

But, who knows, maybe I would end up having another baby, but what would I do as a single mom with an 11-year-old and a baby?  At least the ex will have to pay child support, and half the day care.  But I was a stay-at-home mom until Kimmy was 6 and went off to school.  Even then, I made sure to be home from work when she came home from school.  Being a single mom has changed all that since I am no longer a SAHM, so we make up for it with our "dates", and with movie nights on the sofa.  I had no plan about what to do in the next 6 months.

I am getting ahead of myself again, and rambling.  No one wants to hear other people bitch and moan.  I just couldn't help myself.

I mentioned that I am 34.  I always thought I was a "plain Jane."  Oh, I am not ugly by any means, but I am not a knock-out.  I am your typical girl-next-door, 5' 5" tall, straight dirty blonde hair, cut short, just above my collar.  In high school it was butt-length; I was a Drum Major then.  Not that I was popular, it's just that I knew how to march well.  I am also your typical "pear-shaped" woman.  Small on top with big hips.  I never really lost all the weight I put on with Kimmy and even with a miscarriage put on a little more weight that was hard to take off.  I now weight about 135#, which is an extra 10 pounds on my butt, hips, and tummy.  I haven't measured in a while, but I would probably be 36(AA)-30-40, not much to look at, unless you like little tits and big hips.  I should be 34-26-36.

There is one thing about being pregnant and having babies, and that is my bust line sure improves, being filled with milk.  That's what gets me to the story I'm telling.  That's what started it all.  I'm not sure where to begin.  I just couldn't help myself.

After I put Kimmy to bed, I sometimes spend time pampering myself.  Taking luxurious baths, you know that kind of thing.  I found out about shaving pubic hair from the Internet and the local lingerie shop, and learned how to keep it neat and trim.  Sometimes I take a bath, shave my pubes, and then go to bed with a bottle of baby oil, and rub some onto my clean-shaven skin.  Smooth as a baby's butt!  It feels really good, and helps relax me, helps me sleep better, and relieves some stress of the day.  It's tough as hell being lonely.  Sometimes I rub it on my nipples, and squeeze them while I finger myself.  With the rat gone, the kitty still needed some attention, even if I have to give it to myself.  I guess I pretty much started masturbating myself to sleep.  How lame is that?  It can become rather addicting.
 
------ Chapter 2 ------

I usually sleep either in a nightdress or a night shirt that comes just above my knees.  I don't like anything around my waist at night and don't want to wear panties to bed.  The nightdress has buttons, which I unbutton to rub oil on my breasts, but the night shirt is just like a long t-shirt, so I pretty much quit wearing it.  I mainly want my shoulders and arms warm at night, so I've now taken to wearing a shorty t-shirt.  It covers my shoulders and the tops of my arms, and only comes down to the bottom of my rib cage, so it’s easy for me to squeeze my own nipples when I play with myself.  It's gotten so bad that I actually look forward to going to bed, so that I can play with myself.  It's the only sex I get, and I have come to crave it.

If any of you have been in a similar position, you know how it goes.  You build up a tolerance to whatever you are addicted to, and want more and more.  So it has been with me.  Where I once was content just to put my hand on myself, to touch and comfort myself, I then had to make myself climax every night.  Then I started getting more and more involved.  I bought a snake-bite kit to put on my nipples, to keep them "sucked" while I fingered myself.  I want to try it out on my pussy soon, and see what that does to me.  But I digress.  I bought myself a small pink "pocket rocket" vibrator at the lingerie store, and started using that on my smooth, oiled pussy.  It always gives me a good climax.  I got bold and bought a big blues waterproof fake penis vibrator, almost life sized.  I sometimes use it to fill my pussy while I use the pocket rocket on my clit.  That really gets me off!  

Based on what I saw on the Internet, I tried something new a week ago.  I did the usual, took a nice bath, got my pussy nice and smooth, and played with myself a little.  Basically got myself ready for sex.  I have a bar and a bottle of Purpose, a hypoallergenic cleaner that I use on my body, especially my nipples, navel, pussy, and butt crack.  I feel safe with it, that it won't harm those sensitive spots, and it gets me squeaky clean.  I then use coconut or baby oil on those places, to keep my skin from drying out.  Maybe I should do a TV commercial for Purpose and Johnson's Baby Oil!  I don't think they want a single mom going on TV and saying how good their product is for sex, though.

So, what did I do next?  I went to bed, only wearing my crop top.  My belly was starting to get big and it hardly covers anything any more.  I toweled dry, then took the baby oil, rubbed a little on my titties, rubbed some on my pussy, and squatted down and rubbed it in my butt crack.  I certainly don't want my butt hole drying out from the bath and getting itchy!  I put on my crop top, took my pocket rocket and baby oil, and went to bed.

I started off tweaking my nipples, like I always start.  I lie on my back on top of a thick, folded towel, and drop a few drops of oil on each tit.  Then I slowly circle my nipples with my fingers, the way a lover would, until I ache to have them tweaked, so then give them a hard squeeze, both at the same time, getting a few drops of colostrum, that early mother's milk that comes in after 12 weeks of pregnancy.  Now, I'm ready.  I keep one hand on my titties, and grab the oil with the other.  I pour a little in my navel as a reserve pool, and then dribble some directly onto my mound and my clit, and then pool some into the palm of my hand.  I hold still while I feel the sensation of the oil running down my smooth pussy lips until it dribbles down to my perineum, that area between my pussy and my butt-hole.  Now it's time to go to town.  I take my palm full of oil and press it down onto my pussy.  First I cover all of my pussy with oil, and then I go to work on my labia, rubbing them, pulling them, sliding my fingers between them.  I rock my hips as I deeply rub my pussy.  I take the fake penis and fuck myself with it, imagining that a hot lover is driving his cock deep inside me as I furiously finger my slick, smooth, oily pussy.  Then, with the large fake cock deep inside me, I take the pocket rocket and vibe my clit until I explode it a shattering climax.  Or, at least that's what I usually do.  This night, as I mentioned, I tried something new.  

After I had fucked myself pretty well with the dong, but before I made myself cum, I put the snake-bite cups on my titties.  It really sucks them well, too much so actually, unless I am really hot.  I have to work up to that, and this night I did.  So with both nips were being sucked big time by the vacuum cups, I put some oil in my other hand, lifted my legs high and apart, up towards my shoulders the way a lover would, rocked my hips back, and slid my left hand up behind my butt, and started rubbing oil all over my butt-hole, while I slowly fucked my pussy with the big blue cock.  Finally, I took the pocket rocket, and went to work on my clit, while I slid my middle finger as far as I could up into my butt-hole.  It felt very warm on my finger, and it also felt good.  With my oiled finger up my butt, and big blue filling my pussy, my little pink friend buzzing by clit, I made myself cum really hard.  I mean really hard.  After I came down, I worried that Kimmy might hear me.  That's all I need, my 11-year-old daughter walking into my room when I am right in the middle of a hard climax!  I normally don't keep my door locked, and if she comes into my room, which isn't very often, it's usually 2 or 3 in the morning.  My routine is to wait after she's been in bed a couple of hours, and is in a deep sleep.  When I pulled the snake bite cups off, I noticed they were full of breast milk, which dribbled down my sides when I removed the cups.  I wiped it up with my fingers, and tasted it.  Just as I remembered from when Kimmy was little, it was sticky and sweet.  Still being the early milk, it was darker and thicker than what comes in after the first few days after your baby's born.

So, what did I do next?  The next day, when Kimmy was at school, I went to the lingerie shop and bought myself a butt plug!  One of these days, I may have to try to get the big blue dong up my butt while little pink buzzes my clit.  After some more Internet searches, I have learned to give myself an enema before my bath time, to clean out my butt before I start sticking my fingers, or other things, up my ass.
 
------ Chapter 3 ------

In less than 6 months, I wet from a mild mannered, happy (so I thought) wife with a normal married woman sex life, to a total sex addict!  Of course my sex was only with myself.  As I mentioned, there were always negatives to bringing other people into the equation, especially when I considered my Kimmy.  Maybe I should call myself a masturbation addict.  I have even taken to occasionally tying my own feet to the bed with my legs spread, as I finger and toy fuck myself to climaxes.  I keep getting more and more deviant.  It's easy to picture myself tying my legs to the bed, filling my pussy and ass with toys, binding the toys with ropes, and then cuffing my own hands to the headboard and letting my toys fuck me, with only my hips free to move.  Or getting on my hands and knees, filling my ass and pussy, cupping my tits, and then vibing my clit until I explode.

But all that changed one Friday night not long ago.  I was doing my usual bedtime routine.  I usually start off lying on my side, wearing only my crop top.  When I play with my tits, some milk starts to leak out.  After my preparation of my enema and bath, I lie on my side.  I start by rubbing oily hands on my smooth pussy and ass.  I can reach one hand behind me, or in between my legs, and rub myself while I play with my tits.  As I mentioned, the past week or so I have spent more time on my tits.  I will usually put the butt plug in my ass.  Sometimes I will even slide big blue in my pussy, but now I like to start with just a little rubdown of my pussy, the butt plug in my ass, and then spend time on my titties.  Now that they are a little fuller, I rub and squeeze them more.  Before I was flat-chested with only nipples to show.  Now that I have a little milk, I actually have some tits.  I like having tits.  I am a woman after all.  So I squeeze them, hold them, fondle them, with my eyes closed, working my hands up towards my nips, which are larger than ever.  They're even fatter than the tips of my little fingers now, thanks to milk and snake-bite kits.  I used to love to have my ex suck on them.  Having nothing but nips, my nips are extremely sensitive, and they love being suck and played with.

Of course, there was a year-and-a-half when they were baby Kimmy's milk supply.  Truth be told, they were daddy's milk supply, too!  But that was a long time ago. Now, they are my new play toys.

So, here I am, divorced, fat, pregnant, milky, and horny as hell.  I put my daughter to bed, watched a little TV, and then went through my routine.  I brushed my teeth, took my clothes off, gave myself a warm water enema, took a bath, toweled off, put a little bit of baby oil on my pussy and ass, and went over to the bed.  What a creature of habit I have become, or what a masturbation addict.  Do they have 12-step classes for that?  Not that I want to change.  But what will it lead to?  Oh, not that I do it every night, but I do it as often as I can get away with.  I actually look forward to it!

I walk over to the bed, wearing only my shorty crop T.  Totally exposed from the ribs down.  I put my towel on the bed and the baby oil on the nightstand.  I open the drawer, and pull out my locking bank box (I don't want Kimmy accidentally stumbling on to Mommy's treasure chest.) and take out my purple butt plug, big blue and little pink, and place them on the bed.  I get on my hands and knees, and slide the butt plug in my ass.  It goes in easily and stays in securely.  I lay down on my left side with a small pillow under my right knee for support.  I rub my pussy lips with big blue for a few minutes, getting my smooth and slick pussy nice and ready.  I lift my right leg long enough to slide the dong deep inside my pussy, and turned on to the lowest, slowest vibration setting.  Not enough to really get me off, but enough to feel good, especially if I rocked back and forth a little.  I remember when I was fat with Kimmy, how my ex would fuck me from behind, and how good it felt.  I imagined that I had a lover behind me, filling my pussy with his big fat cock.  It was now time for some titty play.

Sliding both hands under my shirt, I started slowly rubbing my semi-swollen boobs.  I learned how to milk them a long time ago, when Kimmy was little.  Squeeze them slowly at the fullest part.  Work my hands on them really well.  Slide my fingers up towards the nipples.  I gave my nipples a good hard tweak and a pull, and rocked back onto my imaginary lover.  I grab hold of both tits, and slowly squeeze towards the nipples.  At the base of my nips, I squeeze and pull outwards.  I feel the first drops of warm breast milk run down my boobs, and wish that I had a lover to suck me.  I even imagined one lover behind me, his large thrusting manhood filling me up, and another one in front of my, sucking my tits for all he's worth.  I used to ride my ex's cock while he lay on his back, rubbing my clit into his groin as his cock impaled me.  He would squeeze my milky tits and catch the drops of milk in his mouth, then lift his head up to breastfeed from me while we made love.  What the heck, I breastfed him while I fucked his cock!  It feels so good to express my milk this way, all the while slowly rocking back and forth on my cock and ass plug, listening to the rhythm of the rainfall on the roof and windows.  Lost in my own world of self-pleasuring sex.  I couldn't help myself.

"Mommy?"  With my eyes closed and my dreams taking me over, the first "Mommy" didn't quite register.  I thought I imagined it.  Mommies get used to waking up easily when their children call, but I wasn't asleep.  I was lost in my desires.  I couldn't help myself.  

"Mommy, can I sleep with you tonight?"  This time I heard it loud and clear, and opened my eyes to see Kimmy standing right in front of me.  How long had she been there?  Was my rocking motion enough for her to notice?  My rocking was slow and subtle, and the sound of the vibe was muffled by being deep inside me, as well as by the rainfall.  I couldn't even hear it.  Before I could answer, Kimmy had pulled the covers down and had crawled into bed beside me.  Children do this all the time, sleep with their parents.  She had done it several times since I kicked her daddy out, but always in the middle of the night.  This was too early for her.  Now, what?  Well, I'm her Mommy, so I have to stop what I'm doing to help her out, to comfort her.  She'll be back to sleep soon, and maybe then I can finish what I started.

I am still on my left side and she puts her forehead against my lips, and I softly kiss her.  "I love you, Kimmy."  "I love you, too, Mommy."  I settle back down, trying to empty my mind of sexual thoughts, but the motion of the vibe keeps reminding me.  I'll just roll over and turn it off.  If she asks, I'll just tell her that my belly itches.  My thoughts are interrupted once again.

"Mommy, why is the front of your shirt all wet?"  "Well, Kimmy, you know how Mommy's nurse their little babies, right?"  "Right."  "Well, you know Mommy has a baby in her tummy?"

"Yeah."

"Well, my body is making baby milk, and sometimes when I lie down on my side, some of the milk leaks out."  

"Oh."  

"You used to nurse from Mommy's breasts, til you were over a year old, and started eating food.  You were too little to remember it now."  I gave her another kiss on the forehead.

"Does it always leak out like that?"

"When I lie down it does.  Mommy's often wear nursing bras with pads, because when their breasts get full, and when they need to nurse their baby, the milk will often start coming out on its own.  That's kind of what's happening now."  I reached down and got a few drops on my fingertips, and put it to my lips.  "Would you like to taste it?"  "You sure?" she asked.  "Yeah, sure, it's OK" I replied.  I took a few more drops and she licked it off the ends of my fingers.

"It doesn't really taste like milk.  It's warm, and kind of sweet."  She smacked her lips, tasting the last bit and getting her lips dried off.

"It's just what Mommy's little girl needs."  I smiled at her.  "Kimmy, you can nurse from Mommy just like you did when you were little.  You’re not too old.  I'd like you to.  Would you do that for Mommy?"  I lifted my shirt, put my hands on her head and shoulders, leaned over, and moved her face in front of my right tit.  "What do I do, Mommy?"

"Just take the nipple in you mouth and suck on it.  Here."  I grabbed my tit and squeezed, isolating the nipple and putting it in her mouth.  "Put your tongue underneath, and suck in rhythm."  What a case I am, lying here, mostly naked, breastfeeding my 11-year-old daughter.  Her body is pressed up against my pregnant and naked belly.  It felt really good to be nursing her.  It wasn't a 'Mommy duty' like when she was a baby, but it certainly was a bonding experience, and, horny as I had been, it felt sexy as hell to have my nipples sucked on by a real, live human being again, with warm lips and a rough tongue.  "Take all you want, sweetie, just don't bite me."  I closed my eyes, stoked her hair, and basked in the sensation.

To make matters worse, I still had a plug in my ass and a vibe in my pussy.  Now I can't roll over and turn it off, but I am afraid Kimmy will notice the vibrations.  Thinking quickly, I shifted my weight slightly, reached down between my legs and turned it off, but it's still halfway up my sopping wet cunt.  "Sorry, sweetie, Mommy had to scratch an itch."  Damn, that was so lame.

After a few minutes of this, I pulled her loose, shifted my weight and fed her my left tit.  I put my hand on her back and pulled her close to me.  "I love you, Kimmy.  I really like nursing you.  I wish we never had stopped doing this, but had just kept on.  You're my sweet girl. Kimmy."  She didn't say anything.  I put her left hand on my right tit, and cradled my nipple between her thumb and first finger.  She naturally took hold of it and played with it as she sucked.  It felt so good to me.  It was a good bonding experience with Kimmy, but I was starting to get horny again.  Soon enough, Kimmy drifted off to sleep.  I was too horny to sleep.  I needed to cum in the worst way.

With Kimmy asleep, I quietly rolled over and slipped out of bed, and made my way into the living room, taking care not to lose my butt plug.  I did have to take out big blue.  Once in the living room, I lay back on the sofa, and fucked my self as hard as I could with big blue, while holding little pink on my clit, set on maximum vibe.  Oh, I wanted to be fucked in the worse way; my fantasies were running wild.  I wanted a man with a large cock pounding me, slamming that rock hard dick hard and fast into me, feeling his balls slap against my ass.  I was a goner.  I would have been ready for anything.  Rape?  Fuck me up!  Gang bang?  Bring it on!  I was lost in my desire for an orgasm.  I got one, and it was a good one, but I felt empty.  I dozed off.  Twenty minutes later, I put my toys away, crawled back to bed, and snuggled with my little girl, her back to my big belly, my hand on her hip.  Strange thoughts ran through my head in the twilight, but soon it was Saturday morning.
 
------ Chapter 4 ------

By now you may think that I am a sicko, a perverted mom, but I didn't do anything other than comfort and nurse my little girl.  What's wrong with that?

As the morning sun crept through the Window shades, I reached over and ran my fingers through Kimmy's hair.  "Good morning!" I said in a sing-songie voice, as if nothing had happened.  "How'd you sleep last night?"  "Good," said my little sleepy head.  I thought about what to say; I wanted to say something before she did.

"Kimmy," I started off, hesitantly, but then I thought, 'I'm her mom, I don't need to appear hesitant, or anything other than happy with her.'  I kept stroking her hair.  "It was fun to have you sleep with me last night, and it was really cool to breastfeed you again after all these years," I said with a big smile.  "I really enjoyed that."  She looked at me.  "Me, too, Mommy."  I wondered if she really meant it, or if she was just agreeing with her mom.  "My breasts are really full this morning," I exaggerated.  "I think you got my milk flowing.  I would really like you to do it again."  I pulled her close to me, and fed her my tits, one at a time.  I couldn't help myself.  Once again, I put her hand on my free tit, and just as a baby does, she played with that one while sucking on the other.  Soon, she drank me dry and had enough.  I remembered that except for this crop-T that was now covering only my shoulders, I was buck naked!  Kimmy, of course had on her nightgown.  I had taught her to sleep without panties, as a woman's crotch needs to breathe and not be covered up when you’re in bed.  "How do you like that, Kimmy?"  

"I like it, Mommy.  It tastes kind of sweet, and it feels special to be snuggled with you.  Do you like it?"

"Oh, yes, Kimmy, I like it a lot.  It does feel good to be all snuggly, doesn't it?"  "Yeah," she said, nodding her head.  "Plus, it feels good to Mommy to have you suck on my nipples."  "Really?"  "Yes, really."

"What does it feel like?"

"Well, it's kinda hard to describe, except that it makes me feel tingly all over, in a good way."  She had kind of a puzzled look on her face.  "Here, I'll show you.  Now, you're not old enough to have boobies yet, but even 11-year-old big girls like you have nipples."  "OK, yeah," she said.  "So, close your eyes and let Mommy show you what it's like.  I'll teach you; we'll make a game out of it."  "OK."

"Lie on you back and close your eyes."  "OK"  "Now, I'm going to do some things and you tell me if you like it.  You know how you like it when you lie down with your head in my lap and I scratch your back for you?"  "Yeah."  "Well, it's kinda like that, only better.  Now be real still, and tell me how it feels."  I take my right hand, and slowly and lightly, draw little circles on her chest, through her nightgown, being careful not to touch her little nipples, which have only just started to bud.  "That's nice," she said.  "I like that, Mommy."  "Good, but there's more."  I spend a little more time giving her a soft and loving massage on her tummy, chest, and shoulders, and neck.

"Now, I need to lift your nightgown up."  "OK."  I take the hem of her nightgown and gently pull it up to her waist.  She lifts her hips to let me pull it out from under her bottom.  How cute.  My slick and shaved pussy looks just like her hairless little girl pussy.  Her tummy sure doesn't look like mine, though!  I circle my hand around her little belly button, a nice little 'innie', slowly working my hands underneath her nightgown towards her chest.  She hasn't said anything else yet, but just lies there, breathing softly and deeply.  I lift her nightgown up, exposing her little pink nipples.  The only traces of 'boobs' she has is that her pink areolas are puffed up a little bit, just enough that if she were wearing a t-shirt or unlined swimsuit, you could see the bumps of her nipples.  I circle the nipples, first in large circles, then in progressively smaller circles until I am drawing tight little circles around her pink bumps.  "Does that feel good to you?"  "Yeah," as she nods her head.  "OK," I say in a fun, cheerful voice.

I take my finger and put it to my lips, licking it, getting it slightly wet.  (Why did it occur to me to do that?  Then it hit me.  That's what my rat hubby used to do to me that I liked so much.  Why am I doing this?  I don't know.  It just felt so natural.)  I put my moistened finger on her puffy little right nipple, circling that little bump in a small little circle.  I licked my finger again, getting it wetter this time, and this time, I put a little more pressure on her nipple, bending it, pushing it, before finally taking hold of it and pulling it up, the slipperiness of my saliva preventing me from grabbing it too hard.  I realized that I was doing to her just as I had been taught; this is what my ex did to me to get me ready for sex.  Was I getting my daughter ready for sex?  I didn't think so; I was teaching her what it was like to be a woman and to enjoy breastfeeding.

I place my right hand on her left breast, if you can call it a breast.  OK, I put my hand on the left side of her chest, my first two fingers on that bumped-up nipple, slide my fat-girl hips down lower on the bed, lean over, and place my mouth over her right nipple.  My lips just barely touch her skin, and I flick her nipple with my tongue.  Kimmy said nothing, although she takes a quick deep breath when I place my lips on her nipple, and suck it up into my mouth.  It is so small, although it is bigger than my ex's.  Yes, I would occasionally suck his nipples when we made love, I mean when he fucked me.  My right hand plays with her left nip while my mouth sucks her right one.  Instinctively, I lower myself on the bed, and place my left hand underneath her back, and pull her little body up towards my mouth.  I am doing to my little Kimmy exactly what my ex used to do to me!  

But this is all just a game to her, I remember.  Mommy is just showing her some things.  I was NOT trying to seduce my own 11-year-old daughter!  I pulled her over on her right side and sucked her left nipple as I played with her right one using my left hand.  My right hand is behind her back, pulling her close to me.  I stop sucking, and spend a few minutes looking at her little girl chest, drawing more circles on her with my fingers.  I remember when I first got boobs, I was 12 years old.  When I wore a training bra, it made me look totally flat.  Even as an adult woman, I choose bras that have some padding, so that I won't look like a boy when I put a shirt on.  My crummy ex said he liked my little titties, and even bough me some large size training bras that fit a 34-36" chest.  Looking back, I think he just wanted to humiliate me, and I didn't know it.  Back to Kimmy.  This is a game, remember?  I put my hands on her waist, and pushed her away.

"Well, Kimmy, what did you think?  Did you feel like a Mommy nursing her daughter?  Did you feel anything?"

"I... It did make me feel kinda tingly all over... kind of a, like, funny feeling.  It really did feel kind of good, though.  It felt nice.  I liked it."  "Good," I said in a cheery voice, now maybe you know why Mommy likes nursing you.  It feels good, and it's really snuggly."  I gave her a big hug and a squeeze, well, as big a hug as I could lying on my side in bed with my preggo belly.  We lay together for while.  I really wanted to play with my own nipples again, but didn't dare.  Plus, I am still mostly naked.

"Mommy?"  "Yes, honey."  "How come you're having a baby when daddy's not here?"

"Well, hon, you know sometimes people's dogs have puppies when there's no daddy dog around."  "Yeah"  "You've seen how dogs mate, right?"  "Yes."  "You know boy dogs have their boy-dog thingies, right?"  "Yeah."  "Well, the boy dog mounts the girl dog and puts his boy-dog thing inside the girl dog, and squirts his baby seeds in the girl dog.  Then the boy dog goes away and the girl dog has puppies."  "Oh, OK."  I didn't know this was going to be a sex-ed class today.  "Well, before daddy went away, he put his boy thing in me and squirted his baby seed in me, and that's why there's a baby in me.  The same thing happened before you were born."

Kimmy nodded her head.  "OK," she said.  "Do all boys have baby seeds?"  "Once they're grown up, they do.  That's how babies are made.  Boys put their boy thing into the girl and squirt their baby seeds inside her.  Or, I should say, men and women, but boys and girls can do that once they're old enough."  "Am I old enough?"  "Not yet, honey.  Girls have to get their periods first.  And you sure don't want to be having a baby when you're young, so you make sure and don't have sex with a guy until you're married, because that could make a baby."

"How does the seed get up inside, Mommy?  Is it like the guy pees or something?"  "No honey.  A man's thing is normally small and limp, but when a man is around a woman, and they are making love together, his thing gets pumped up with blood and gets big and stiff, kind of like a large thumb, or something like that, except even bigger.  Then he puts in inside the woman's vagina, and he does his baby squirting thing."  "How does that happen?"  "Well, when a man and a woman do that, it feels really good to both of them, kind of like how it feels good when you're breastfeeding, only a whole lot better, and because it feels so good, it just kinda happens automatically, and squirts the baby seed inside her."  Kimmy made a funny face with her mouth and made an "HMMmm" sound.  "It's like when you see something really funny, or someone tickles you, and you laugh automatically, without even thinking about it."  I reached out and tickled her sides, and she jumped back, clinched her elbows to her side, and laughed out loud.  "Kind of like that," I said, "automatically.  Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, I guess.  I'm still not sure how it happens."  

"Would you like me to show you?"  "OK."  I am about to pass the point of no return.

"Now, as I said, a man's thing, it's called a penis, is normally really small and limp, not much bigger than a Vienna sausage.  But," and I got this gee-whiz, bright idea smile on my face, "like I said, when a man gets excited by a woman when they're making love, it gets..." I reached under the covers and found big blue "as big as this!" and I held up all 8-1/2" of big blue, right in front of her.  She gasped and her eyes got as big as saucers.  "Oh, my God!"  I smiled, and said, "that's right, honey, this is actual size.  Your daddy was actually this long, but thicker, a little bigger around."  Kimmy sat there flabbergasted.

I continued with the sex-ed class.  "Now, you know how we girls have a little slit down there, where you go pee."  She nodded her head.  "Well, that's our vagina, and on a grown woman, the slit is bigger, and that's where a man's penis goes in, and that's where a baby comes out.  It can stretch out big enough for a baby's head, and that's as big as a softball."  I'm speaking quite eagerly now.

"So, here's how it works.  A man and a woman start snuggling, and kissing, and hugging, and they start getting excited about it, like in the movies."  Kimmy nodded an understanding look and said, "OK."  "When that happens, and the woman gets excited, and wants to make love to the man, her body starts making a slippery fluid in her slit, her vagina.  Just like when you run around and get hot and your body starts making sweat, except that this is only in your vagina, and it's really slippery, to help the man's penis get inside her, and it's also what the baby seeds swim in."  Kimmy's eyes are big and she is just looking and nodding her head.  I am really starting to get into this.

"Now, to help each other get ready, the man and woman do things to each other to help them feel better.  The man will suck on the woman's nipples.  You already know that feels nice, and the woman will kiss and suck on the man's penis."  "What?? You're kidding!"  "No, honey, it's one of those things men and women do together when they are making love, to help each other, and to make each other feel really good... and to make babies," I said, remembering what this conversation is supposed to be about.  "Like a popsicle."  I said, and I took big blue and starting licking it up the entire length.  I looked at my daughter while licking the shaft, smiled, and said, "Men really like this!" raising my eyebrows.  "And this."  I put my lips on the head, kissed it, licked it, and then slowly started sliding the shaft into my mouth.  I eagerly and sloppily sucked on it for a minute, and then took it out of my mouth, looked at Kimmy, and said, "It helps to get it really wet, and besides, a man really likes it when you do this.  Of course, we girls like it too, cuz it's a lot of fun."  I took it deep in my mouth one more time, getting it coated with as much as my spit as I could.  It was almost dripping.

"Now, watch this!"  I laid on my back spread my legs, and put big blue lengthwise between my pussy lips.  It didn't occur to me at the time that I was exposing my pussy to my own daughter, for the first time.  I didn't look at her to see the shock on her face.  "The woman lays down, spreads her legs, and the man gets on top of her, in between her legs, to where they can kiss each other, and puts his penis just like this."  The head of big blue was right on my clit.  "Then, he pushes it inside her, and it feels like heaven to both of them." And with that, I plunged big blue all the way into my slick, wet pussy, pulled it out, and pushed it back it again, even turning it in circles.  I gasped, closed my eyes, and gave the dong several long strokes.  I started fucking myself in rhythm, gasping with each plunge, leaned my head to the left, opened my eyes to look at my 11-year-old, and said, "Ooohhh, this feels sooooo goooood.  Sooooo goooood.  MMMMmmmmmmmm."  I was past the point of no return, past the final threshold.  I was fucking myself with a fake cock with my 11-year-old daughter inches away.

I stopped just long enough to look at her and say, "Kimmy, you are going to see just how good this feels to Mommy.  Don't worry, because it's all natural, it all feels really, really, good."  My breaths are heavy and rapid.  "I am going to wiggle around, make lots of noise, and may even shake, but don't worry, because it all happens naturally and I do it because it Feels So Good!  OK?"  "Okay."  She sounded a little hesitant.  "Put your hands on me, Kimmy."  "Where?"  I took her hands in mine, and put one on my tummy, and the other one my left nipple.  "Now, hold on to Mommy and see just how much I like this.  The more noise I make, and the more I move around, just means that I like it all that much better.  It's OK, Kimmy.  Just like when a puppy gets really excited and wags its tail, and wiggles around, and barks and whines, all because it's happy and excited.  Well, Mommy is just like that puppy right now.  All excited"

With her two little hands on me, I took the dong, and slowly started fucking myself with it once again.  I took it out and rubbed it all over my pussy lips and clit.  "It feels really good when a man does this to a woman."  I started moving the dong over my swollen lips while rubbing my clit, which was getting me really excited.  I turned the vibe on and shoved it up my cunt, fucking myself furiously while rubbing my clit.  I was bucking my hips and thrusting my pussy up to meet the fake cock.  I wanted so much to be on my side, getting my pussy filled with a real cock from behind, my lover's arms wrapped around me, squeezing my milky little tits and kissing the nape of my neck.  I am lost in my fantasy, fucking myself silly and about to cum.  While my right hand fucks my pussy with big blue, my left hand rubs my hot clit.  I am about to go over the top.  

There is just one more thing I need.  I take my right hand and put it over my daughter's right hand.  "Squeeze my nipple, Kimmy!"  I told her.  "Please!  Squeeze it, pull it, twist it" I pleaded with her.  "Kimmy!" I commanded, “Milk me! MILK ME!!!"  I yelled out that last one as I was bucking like crazy and about to cum, while squeezing Kimmy's finger on my nipple.

I think Kimmy must have freaked out by what was happening.  I was so lost in my fantasy that I had almost forgotten that it was my 11-year-old daughter that had her hands on my tit.  Except that I did know; I had just had her suck my tits, had given her an explanation of the facts of life, and was now giving her an X-rated exhibition of an adult woman, her mom, masturbating herself to orgasm, not to mention that it ecstasy I had just asked her to milk me.  I just couldn't help myself.

Maybe it was because I had prepared her in advance.  Maybe it was because she was being a good girl and just doing what Mommy said.  Perhaps she was too freaked out and just did what I asked because she didn't know what else to do.

She grabbed my nipple, and squeezed it, and pulled it.  That was the last straw, and I exploded in climax, my body tensing and tightening and jerking, while I was moaning and crying out...

I had stopped fucking myself with big blue, and was only gently rubbing my slick, shaved pussy, still coming down from my climax.  My breathing was starting to catch up, as my breaths were still short and heavy.  I put my hand back on Kimmy's to get her to stop tweaking my nipple.  I just had her place her hand on my breast and hold it there, while I held her hand.  I put my other hand on my right breast, and gently caressed it.  I took a deep breath, opened my eyes, and looked over at Kimmy.  Whatever would I say?

We stared in each other's eyes for a moment, neither of us speaking.  Finally, I said, "I love you, Kimmy.  Thank you for being here and helping me.  That felt really, reaaaaallly good."  I almost asked her if I scared her, but I didn't want to give her a chance to say that it did.  I rolled over on my side towards her, and motioned for her to lie down in front of me.  Her back was to me, and I gave her a good squeeze and a hug.  "Kimmy, I'm glad you were here with me for that.  I don't need to hide from you the things that make Mommy feel good, or wondering why Mommy is pregnant."  Still holding her, I tickled her, and she squirmed and giggled.  "You see, it's a lot like being tickled, in that your body does things on its own, wiggling around and stuff like that, except that it feels so good that you almost don't want it to stop."  I give her another good hug.  We laid there for 20 minutes or so, even dozing off.

"Hey, how would you like to go out for breakfast?"  "Sure, Mom," She replied.  I scooted my fat body back, pulled her over to face me, and said, "But first, you need another Mommy breakfast."  I pulled her head to my breast, and fed her my tits, one at a time, to nurse from me again.  The whole time I was stroking her hair, rubbing her back, patting her hips.  It was totally nonsexual; just another mom breastfeeding her daughter.  "I should have never stopped nursing you, Kimmy; this is so special, so snuggly, so cuddly and warm.  I really love you, sweetie.  It's just that people started saying that I needed to stop after you were a year old.  You didn't want to, you know.  You used to fuss at me when I wouldn't let you nurse.  I'll never stop nursing you again, Kimmy.  I want to nurse you every day, to love my girl in this special way."  She let go to look at me.

"But aren't I too old for this, Mommy?"  "Not unless you think you are," I said.  "Now that I have milk again, there's no reason at all to stop.  It's a special bonding time for us, and I really love it when you nurse from me.  It's so special, so relaxing, so loving."  This continued until she had nursed from both sides.  

So, let's get dressed and go to IHOP; what do you think?"  "Sure, Mommy, that would be great."  She bounded out of bed to get ready, as did I.
 
------ Chapter 5 ------

I got up, took a shower, washed my hair, and my toys.  It was only on washing off my boobs that I thought about last night and this morning; about breastfeeding my 11-year-old and masturbating in front of her, even having her pull my nipple when I was cumming.  I sloughed it off and went to get ready.  I looked at myself in the full length mirror, holding my pregnant belly, not wanting to get too attached lest I miscarry again.  My body looked fat, not just pregnant.  My hips, thighs, and ass were too big and my boobs were too small.  Only the added fullness of my pregnancy game them any substance at all.  I played with my nipples and thought of my snake bite cups, of Kimmy sucking on them, and how I wanted them to have constant attention.  My thoughts were turning to things I had seen on the Internet; suction cups, nipple stretchers, piercing, a whole gamut of ideas was drifting through my mind.

"You ready, Mommy?"  Kimmy was calling to me from the hallway.  "Just a minute, sweetie," I called back to her.  I slipped on a red, sleeveless maternity dress, with large flower prints on it.  It came to just above my knee, and almost made me look pretty.  I finished brushing my hair, put on a headband and some sandals, and went out to meet Kimmy to go to IHOP.

She was already in the living room waiting for me.  I looked at her and thought that my little girl is growing up.  Her hair is long and straight, the way mine was at that age, down almost to her waist, though it was somewhat darker than mine at a light brown.  Being a young girl, she is also more tanned than I, as I am a real 'white girl', and very pale.  Her hair parts in the middle and makes a nice frame for her face.  She still has some of that little girl fat, not in a fat-girl kind of way, but just enough to have a small amount of that little girl plumpness.  She has yet to develop hips, and if not for the long hair and girlie tennis shoes with lace-top socks, she would look like a real tomboy.  She was wearing blue jean shorts, about the size of gym shorts, and a yellow t-shirt with green trim around the collar, sleeves and hem, that came exactly to her waist and just met her shorts.  What a cutie she is.  The shorts make her legs look long for her size, which I guess they are.  When she stood up to go out to the garage with me, I noticed one more thing that kept her from looking too boyish; her budding nips.  I hadn't really noticed it before, but the t-shirt definitely had two little bumps on the front.  Oh, to be a young girl again.

We had a nice breakfast of pancakes, eggs, and toast, and had a nice visit, and afterwards, I took us for a walk in the park, as they have some nice hike-and-bike trails that are open enough to be safe for single girls and women.  After a while, we sat on a park bench, and she began to question me some more.  "Mommy, do women really put a man's thingy in there mouths and suck on it?  Isn't that gross?"  I looked at her and smiled.  "Yes, honey, we really do.  Of course you want to make sure it's nice and clean first!  It really feels good to the man and its lots of fun for the woman."  "Really?"  "Sure.  It's fun because you know he likes it so much, and besides, it's fun and sexy to feel it growing bigger.  It gets really stiff, but the skin is still really soft.  It feels really nice, and it especially feels nice when he slides it up inside you.  Oh, boy does it feel good.  Sometimes, though, you may just want to play, or maybe you don't want to make a baby, or maybe it's your period, so you let him put it in your mouth the way he would put it in your vagina."

"Huh?"  She had a very quizzical sideways look on her face.  "You see, sweetie, a man's baby seed is warm and slippery, and full of protein.  It has kind of a sweet-and-salty taste to it.  It's a very loving thing to have a man do that."  I almost started to tell her that her daddy used to fuck my mouth, oh, not in those words of course, but I stopped myself.  The less said about her daddy, the better.  If not for Kimmy's sake, I would have wanted to find a man already, but who wants a single pregnant woman anyway?

Kimmy interrupted my thoughts.  "Wow, adults do some funny things.  I just thought it was a bunch of kissing and stuff.  I guess I never really thought about it.  It seems kind of weird."

"Was it weird to watch me last night, Kimmy?"  "A little, but you kind of told me what you would be doing, but it was still kind of weird, Mommy.  I wasn't sure what to think."

"Well sweetie, it may have seemed kind of weird, but it's something you hadn't seen before, and didn't know about.  But it's important for you to know why Mommy has a baby in her, and why..." I almost mentioned her daddy again, "Why it feels so good to Mommy.

"Kimmy, I was serious when I said that I want to keep letting you breastfeed.  I really liked it, and it's a special time for the two of us.  Plus, now that my milk is coming in, I am going to need to empty it out several times a day."  "Really?"  There was that puzzled look again.  "Yes, really.  Mommy's breasts make milk again, now, and if I don't let you nurse then they will get really full and start to hurt.  I could get a breast pump and pump it out that way, but I would much rather let you do it, OK?"  I was exaggerating a little bit, as my milk really wasn't flowing as much as I said it was.  But there was some there, and I knew that the more I nursed her, the more milk I would produce.  "Um, OK, I guess, but it still seems that I'm too old."  "You're never too old, as long as Mommy has milk.  Lots of mommies do this, nurse their older girls, it's just that you don't see it or hear about it.  You hardly ever even see mommies nurse their little babies, but just about every mommy does.  What I really like about it is the closeness we share we you nurse from me.  I really like that."  At that, I took stood up and took her hand, to walk some more, this time back towards our minivan, me waddling along, and Kimmy bouncing along.  There was so much more I wanted to tell her and show her.  I was enjoying being her sex-ed teacher, and I needed to think about the next lesson, which would either be that night, or the next morning.

When we got back to our minivan, I got in the back seat, and told her to breastfeed some more.  I unbuttoned to top of my dress, pulled it off my shoulders, and sat topless in the back seat while my daughter suckled on me, drinking my milk.  I thanked her, gave her a kiss on the cheek, and told her I love her.

That night, after a normal afternoon and early evening, we cuddled up on the sofa and watched '13 Going on Thirty' while we had popcorn.  After dinner, but before the movie, I pulled my dress over my shoulders and had her breastfeed me for her dessert.  I was getting very used to this.  After the movie, I exposed my self yet again, and cradled her in my arms as I nursed her.

"You know what I like to do at the end of a long day?" I asked her.  "I like to take a special luxury bath.  How would you like Mommy to give you a special luxury bath tonight?"  "OK."  "I'll get the bath ready, and you go get yourself ready."  "OK. Mommy."  I went back to the master suite, and started the bath in our garden tub, putting my special oils and bubbles in it, and getting it just right.  The last thing I did was strip naked and sit in the tub. 

"Bath's ready, come and get it!"  Here came Kimmy bounding in wearing her bathrobe.  "Come on in, silly," I told her, "The waters' great."  She seemed a little surprised that I was in the tub, but she got right on in and sat down facing me.  "Now, let me show you how a lady takes a special bath."  I proceeded to be my daughter's bath servant.  Oh, we splashed and we played, and were very girlie and all, but I made sure and take my softest washcloth and bathe her from head to toe.  I took my time, and lovingly caressed and bathed her, not just running the washcloth over her, but soaping my hands with Purpose, and cleaning her entire body.  I cleaned her armpits, and spent plenty of time washing her chest, and especially her puffy little girl nipples, pulling her body back onto mine as I caressed her.  I took plenty of time to explain to her how a lady cleans herself and why.  I played with her navel, getting it nice and clean, and washed her back with loving care.  I told her to turn around and face me.  I was leaning against one end of the tub and she was leaning against the other.  I took her feet, and tenderly washed her feet, and in between her toes.  Instinctively, I kissed her toes, and even kissed them, not even thinking about it.  

I took her feet and put them on either of me.  She was laying back, her butt on my knees, and her crotch almost against my preggo belly.  One leg at a time, I slowly worked my soapy hands all the way up her legs, just stopping at her little girl slit.  Her labia were clean and puffy, like a little girl's should be, soft and close together.  All the while I was explaining to her about those special things a lady does to make a bath a relaxing, luxurious time.  Now I had to teach her how to clean herself.

"A woman's slit is a special place, Kimmy, and you must keep it clean.  Not just in front, but in back, too.  Of course you pee in front and poop in back, but there's so much more.  When you're married, your husband puts his penis in there, and spurts his baby seeds, his semen, inside you.  Your natural body fluids lubricate you and carry his seed up to your womb.  Of, course, when you have a baby, the baby has to come out of the same place.  I taught you a long time ago to wipe front to back when you go potty, but take time to clean yourself in the bath, like this."  It never occurred to me that I was seducing my daughter, and that maybe I shouldn’t be.  Everything felt so natural and good.  

Rinsing my hands, I took the liquid Purpose, and pumped some directly onto her little mound.  I then pumped some onto my fingers and slowly ran my fingers over her little girl pussy, palming my hand on my daughter's cunt as she sat spread-eagle in my lap.  Before long I was running my fingers in between those puffy little lips, showing her how to make sure and get herself clean, to get any pee or sweat or lint and stuff out of there.  "There's another reason to keep clean," I stated.  "What's that, Mommy?" she said softly.  Up to this time, she had been very quiet, saying little more than an "OK" or "Uh-huh" while she nodded her head.  I was hoping she was enjoying this as well as learning something.  I was enjoying it, a little too much maybe, but everything felt so good.

"You know how I told you how women like to kiss a man's penis?"  "Yeah."  "Well, women like to have their vaginas kissed, too.  And just like you want a man to keep his penis clean, cuz that's where he pees, you need to keep your vagina clean for your husband to kiss it.  When you love someone, there is no place on your body you want to keep from them, and there's no place on their body you won't want to kiss."  "But, Mommy, I won't be getting married for a long time, I'm only 11!"  "I know, sweetie, but this is good practice to become a good habit as you get older.  You have to pee and poop, and so you want to keep yourself clean every day, just as you brush your teeth to keep them clean.  Pee and poop would start to get smelly and that's kind of yucky isn't it?"  "Yeah!"  "So just remember what Mommy is teaching you about this, and make it a lifetime habit.  Besides, it feels kind of nice, doesn't it?"  "Yeah.  It feels good when you rub your hands all over me."  I smiled my cheeriest big smile, and said in my happiest voice, "Good! Now I have to clean your backside.  Turn over on your hands and knees."  She complied and here I was sitting in the tub, with Kimmy's knees on either side of my legs and her butt in front of my face.

I got some warm water and poured it over the small of her back, he buttocks, and into her little crack.  With loving hands I kneaded and rubbed her tight little buns, and the back of her thighs.  I cleaned the inside of her thighs, and my fingers once again ran around and between her girlish pussy lips and then all the way up to her tight little butt hole.  I took some more of the liquid Purpose, and pumped in onto the top of her crack, and watched as it ran down to her anus.  I pumped a generous amount of the liquid onto the first two fingers of my right hand, and spread it over her cute little bum hole.  "I clean out my bottom every night when I take a bath, so it's nice and clean, and you can to, just like this."  I pumped a fresh load onto my index finger, started at her perineum, slid it up to her anus, and slipped my finger inside, up to the first, and then the second knuckle.  I rotated my finger twice and then pulled it out.  Then I did it again.  "There," I said, "nice and clean, just like your Mommy's."  Well it would have been if I had given her an enema, but that wasn't in the cards tonight.

"Here," I said, and pulled her back, to where I was sitting sideways.  She was still on her hands and knees; her knees to the right of my legs and her hands to the left.  I slipped my soapy, oily, slippery right hand between her legs, and started to rub her slit with the side of my forefinger, my thumb pressing against her cute little butt hole with every stroke.  At the same time, I was pulling her body towards me, so that my tits were on the side of her back and her tummy was up against my pregnant belly.  While keeping up the motion of my hand against her pussy, I took my left hand and started to play with her little tittie buttons.  I slid the first two fingers of my right hand lengthwise into her little slit, and pressed my thumb against her anus, exactly the way my ex used to do to me.  He called it cradling the world in his hands or something like that.  At the same time I was tweaking her little girl nipples.  All this happened naturally and easily.  It was not until the next Monday approached, that I realized that anyone else would have thought that I was having sex with my own daughter; that I was finger fucking her.  I didn't look at it that way.  I was just naturally loving my little girl.

After a couple of minutes of this, I took the shower head and rinsed off her smooth, oiled, naked body with clean warm water.  "Now I'll show you how ladies keep themselves smooth and clean.  When you get older, you start to get body hair.  Well, body hair is fine for a man; but we ladies keep our bodies shaved and sexy looking."  I looked down at my out-of-shape body.  "Well, maybe not so sexy, but clean and trim, anyway."  "I think you look pretty, Mommy."  "Thank you, sweetie," I said as smiled at her and stroked her cheek with my fingers.  I took some soap and my razor and showed her how I shave my underarms, explaining all the why's and what-for’s.  Then I sat on the edge of the tub, and with my legs spread and my feet in the water, I did the same with my legs, going all the way up.  "We also get hair right here," I said, putting my hand on my mound.  "Pubic hair, dark and curly,"  Because of my belly, I really couldn't see myself.  "It's known as pussy hair, because we call our vaginas our pussies.  I'm not sure where the name came from, probably because of the soft, curly hair, but to really be smooth and sexy we keep it shaved, the same as our armpits and legs.  So, just a few minutes ago, I was cleaning your pussy and your anus, which is your butt hole.  Here, will you hold this mirror for me?  Thanks."  I gave her a hand-held mirror to hold, and positioned it so I could see my pussy.  I lathered up and began shaving.

I had to reposition the mirror several times to try and reach it all.  Finally, I asked her to do the last little bit, to the sides of my pussy lips, telling her to be careful.  I spread my legs as far as I could and leaned back, giving her full and complete access to her mother's pussy.  As she carefully shaved the sides of my pussy, I closed my eyes and remembered those good old days when my ex did this for me, which always ended with him eating me to a wonderful climax, and then fucking my brains out with his fat cock.  It felt nice to feel someone else's fingers on my pussy.  It was the first time anyone but my ex, or my doctor, had touched my pussy.  I was starting to get excited.  I couldn't believe it; I actually wanted to take hold of her and pull her mouth to my clit!

I shook myself back to reality, and took the opportunity to talk about babies as I had her rinse me off with the shower head.  She had just finished shaving my pussy, with her face inches away, and was looking at the place where she was born.  We talked a minute or two about how our vaginas, now being referred to as our pussies, have to stretch to let a baby out, but that they can still stretch out, and how we can exercise our crotch muscles with Kegel exercises.  I also likened it to the way mommies' tummies stretch out, like how our butt holes stretch out for a large poop.  I didn't talk about putting toys, or cocks, up my ass.  I do have my limits.  Or at least I did.

"OK, now I want you to shave my bottom the same way, since I can't reach it."  "OK, Mommy."  I turned around, got on my hands and knees, and placed my ass facing Kimmy's face.  I lathered up my crack, and gave her instructions on how to shave my crack without cutting me.  After she rinsed me off, I told her to clean my anus and pussy the way I did hers.  I reached back and pumped a generous amount of Purpose on each of her hands and then dumped a big load at the top of my crack, feeling it run down over my asshole.

Soon I felt Kimmy's fingers on my ass.  She worked the soap around my asshole, and I told her to go ahead and put her soapy fingers inside, just the way I did with her.  I must admit it felt good to feel someone else fingering my ass, and I was really starting to enjoy it.  "Kimmy, clean Mommy's slit and crack the way I did yours.  I would really like that."  Kimmy slid her fingers lengthwise between my pussy lips.  I could tell that I was slippery, and not just from any soap or bath oil.  With her thumb presses against my anus and her fingers sliding between my cunt lips, I was getting very hot.  I didn't want her to stop.  I put my head down on the side of the tub, closed my eyes, and with one hand starting tweaking my nipples.  "Kimmy, don't stop," I told her.  "Keep doing that for a few minutes.  You can do it harder or faster if you want.  I really like it."  Oh, it felt good to have someone besides myself fingering me, pleasuring me.  I was about to lose it.  "Keep going, Kimmy, Mommy is going to climax again, like I did last night.  Don't stop!"

I started rocking my hips back and forth, then reached my hand down and rubbed my clit until I came.  I kept saying, "Yes, yes, yes.  Oooh, yes, mmmmm," as my body shivered, until my climax subsided.  I put the palm of my hand on hers, causing her to stop rubbing me.  "Thank you so, much.  That felt so good."  I turned around, reclined against the back of the tub, took Kimmy to my side, and had her nurse from my tits again, as they were starting to leak from the excitement.  Again, it all felt so normal, so natural, so loving.  I let the water drain, and gave us each a final rinse with the warm, fresh water from the shower head.  We toweled off and then it was time for bed.  I took her hand and mine, and we walked together to my partner-less queen-sized bed.  The thought of putting her in her PJs and tucking her in bed never crossed my mind.
 
------ Chapter 6 ------

I sat on the side of the bed next to Kimmy.  Both of us were freshly bathed and buck naked.  "Ladies also do a little after-bath care, Kimmy.  When you were a baby, I used to give you baby oil and baby powder, so it's kind of like that.  If fact, I still use baby oil to keep my skin smooth.  Would you like me to show you?"  "Sure, Mommy."  "First we put just a dab of powder on your armpits; not much, cuz at your age you don't need much.  When you're older, you may want to use a little more.  Now, I would say lie down across Mommy's lap, but I don't have a lap these days.  So, here, lie down on your tummy with this pillow under your waist."  So, there she was, my 11-year-old daughter, naked and ass up on my bed, as I was preparing to powder her bottom.  What happened next flowed naturally.

I started by putting a little baby oil in my hands, and rubbing into her butt cheeks.  Before long I was fingering her pussy slit and asshole as I had done in the bathtub.  She only said, "That feels good, Mommy" a couple of times, and then only made soft cooing sounds, but she was definitely rocking her hips, and pressing her pussy down onto my hand.  I couldn't believe it; I think she was getting sexual pleasure from this, and she didn't even know it.  Fleeting thoughts began to race through my mind; fantastic thoughts.  Nasty, decadent thoughts.  I wanted to have sex with her, and I wanted her to eat my pussy until I was delirious.  I had to compose myself.  I had never even had a lesbian thought in my life, or even a hint of lesbian desire, and I had never thought of my daughter in a sexual way.  I had to clear my mind.

What am I going to do?

I did what came naturally.  I pulled her towards the edge of the bed, with her hips still on the pillow, to where her legs were hanging off the edge of the bed.  I knelt down on the floor with my face inches from her ass.  During this, I never once took my hand away from her pussy.  I kept up the pace of sliding my fingers between her pussy lips with my thumb on her anus.  I felt the tiny nub of her little hidden clitoris.  She pressed herself down onto my hand, Then, I pulled my thumb slightly away from her anus and drooled on it,  move my hand up towards the front of her and slid my thumb up inside her cunt, where I know nothing had ever penetrate before.  With my thumb in her cunt and my fingers pressed up against her little budding clit, I lifted her higher off the bed, resting my elbow on the mattress.  Only her head, shoulders and forearms were on the bed, her feet were now resting on my shoulders.  I pulled her towards me and began licking from my own thumb in her pussy to the tight, tiny pucker of her little girl asshole.  Eagerly I licked her anus, probing my tongue and slurping it around.  I wanted to give her her first orgasm.  I wanted to fuck my own 11-year-old daughter, I wanted to fuck her until her little body shook and trembled and spasmed with shameless lust.  I wanted to devour her little pussy.  I took my hand out of her pussy, lay down on the bed, and then pulled her over on top of me and wrapped my arms around her waist.  Her legs were spread on either side of my head, and my face was buried in her little cunt, her head resting against my fat belly, right up against my now pushed out navel.  Greedily and hungrily I licked and lapped and probed her virginal pussy.

I loved doing this, but she was too heavy for my out-of-shape body.  I rolled over and put her on the bed on her back, knelt down and put her legs over my shoulders and my mouth back on her pussy.  This time, I slid my index finger into her ass and my thumb up her cunt while I lapped at her baby clit like a hungry bitch.  I reached my free hand up and started squeezing her tiny little titty buds, pulling them and stretching them.  Looking back, I can see how someone would say that I raped my own daughter.  I didn't see it that way.  I was loving her, teaching her, caressing her, pleasuring her.  I was gladly, eagerly, pleasuring my daughter Kimmy.

I made her cum.  

It was her very first climax, and I gave it to her as a gift.  

I heard the whines and moans coming from her throat.  I felt her lift her hips and push them to my mouth, which made me tongue her even more aggressively.  Her pushing came more rapidly, until her entire body tensed up and then started spasming.  Shaking.  Shuddering.  Her body jerked several times, tensed one last time, and then relaxed.  I immediately slowed down, and began tenderly, softly kissing her, just barely swirling my tongue around her little cunny.  A moment later, after I sensed she had finished, I crawled up on the bed, lay on my side, pulled her up next to me, and began kissing her.  Not the usual quick little mother to daughter peck, but a full lover's kiss.  A full mouth lover's kiss, complete with my tongue opening her lips and teasing her tongue and teeth.  I kissed her as I caressed her pussy and titties, running my hand from her crotch to her torso and back.  I kissed her with lips still wet from her own girly pussy juices.  I kissed her and then I rolled her over on her side, her back to my belly.  It would have been a perfect spoon if not for my baby-filled womb.  I hugged her tightly, and told her how much I loved her, how sweet she is, how special she is to me, how much I really loved her.

We were both about ready to fall asleep, so I rolled her back facing me and let her nurse from my tits some more as we both drifted off to sleep, while I petted and stroked her naked body, but not before I told her again how much I loved my little girl, and how glad I am that she is my little girl.  We slept, naked together, cuddled in a loving embrace.  When we awoke Sunday morning, I immediately fed her from my milky tits, while I fondled her own little nips.

We had things to do on Sunday.  She finished her homework, I did household chores.  We washed the car, and I loved the way she looked in a wet t-shirt and cotton gym shorts, her little buds showing through the shirt and the way the shorts clinged to her cute little ass.  She dried off and played with her friends, while I went to my bedroom, got on my hands and knees in bed, and fucked myself to a hard climax with three toys, one in my ass, one in my pussy, and a vibe on my clit. 

That night, after supper, we cuddled up on the sofa and watched 'Sleepless in Seattle'.  Afterwards, we both stripped naked, and I nursed her, and fingered her smooth little girl pussy and ass while she suckled from me, and then went to bed.  Together.  Naked.  Once again, I fondled her puffy nips, and rubbed my fingers on her soft little pussy.  Yes, I made her cum.  Then I licked her pussy clean, gave her a wet full mouth lover's kiss, and then nursed her to sleep while rubbing her smooth naked body.

The next day was a school day.  I packed her lunch, told her I loved her, gave her a kiss and a love pat on the butt, and sent her off to the school bus.

After she left, I sat down on the sofa to reflect back on the events of the last few days, and how the events of the last few months led to this.  I didn't look upon my daughter as my lesbian lover.  I was still heterosexual.  I still needed and wanted a man, I just didn't want a new husband right now, and didn't want to think about a lover or an affair.  What we were doing wasn't even sexual.  OK, it was definitely sexual when I licked her pussy the first time.  But what we did I saw as normal mother-daughter love.  I am teaching her, instructing her, guiding her.  I am doing this in a way that won't leave her devastated or broken hearted by the typical high school boyfriend.  You know, you go to bed with a guy because you think you love him and he loves you, then he tells his friends and suddenly they all want a piece of your ass.  Your boyfriend drops you, and the girls call you a slut.  At least that's the way it was when I was in high school.  I didn't go down that road.  My ex is the only man I've had sex with.

My daughter will learn about her body, and about sexuality, from the one who truly loves her the most, me.  We will continue to enjoy a normal, healthy mother-daughter relationship, which now includes us sleeping together, me breastfeeding her, and us pleasuring each other's bodies.  What's wrong with that?  We love each other.  Kimmy is not my lesbian lover.  She is my 11-year-old daughter, and we love each other very much.  That love now includes sexual pleasures as well.  It's all very loving and natural.  

Somehow, I need to find a way to tell Kimmy that depth of our love for each other is not to be shared with other people.  Just think what the school would do if they found out.  Probably put me in jail with a scandalous trial, and take her away from me for good.  And for what?  For loving and teaching my daughter?    How many grown women wish that their mother had told them the whole truth about sex?  Most of them.

That being settled in my own mind that Monday morning, what did I do?  I went shopping, waddling all the way, and bought a couple of Mommy tops.  One says 'Breastfeeding - It does a body good' and the other one says, "I love my little girl."  

I also found two new shirts for Kimmy.  One is pink, and written across the chest are the words, 'I love my Mommy'.  The other one says 'Mommy's milk is the best'.  After that I went to the lingerie shop and bought myself the cutest new top.  Not a maternity top, but a pink t-shirt.  There is a logo on it, like the international symbol outline figure that they put on some women's restroom doors.   You know, two little vertical bars for legs, the silhouette of a full dress, and then the silhouette of a head with shoulder length hair.  Underneath the woman's figure is a box.  Printed in the box are the words 'I Like Girls'.

This way we each have a shirt we can wear in public, and we each have a pink one that we can wear at home.

I went home, stripped naked, put on my new 'I Like Girls' shirt, sat down in front of my full length mirror so I could watch myself in my new top, and fucked myself silly, making myself cum at least three times, and getting milk stains on my new shirt.  

I had to wash it, as Kimmy and I wore our new pink shirts to bed that night.  

A week later, I miscarried again.  I had to go to the hospital and get cleaned out with a D & C.  Having no babysitter anymore, and not wanting to send Kimmy to her dad as his shack-up slut, I kept Kimmy out of school on Friday and brought her with me to spend the night in the hospital with me.  I was so full of mixed emotions.  I cried because I had lost another baby.  I was relieved because I didn't know how I was going to raise a baby and an 11-year-old as a single mom.  I cried some more.  Kimmy was great, holding my hand, and asking me questions, and telling me that everything was OK.  I hated for her to see her mommy like this, distraught and crying and all.  That weekend, after going home, I stayed in bed alot, but didn't feel up to touching myself, for obvious reasons.  I did squeeze my tits enough to milk them into a towel; it helped me to feel better.

The next week was pretty uneventful, except that I was pretty listless.  I got over the soreness, and healed OK, but inside, I was confused and lonely.  Kimmy came home from school, and we usually just had a simple meal, and she did her homework and played with her friends.  She was very kind to me, holding my hand as I watched TV, and doing most of the kitchen work.  

But I needed her to do more.  I needed her to breastfeed. We soon settled back into a routine of us both stripping naked, and me nursing her and fingered her smooth little girl pussy and ass while she does.  I love it, and so does she.  Now, I nurse her when she comes home from school, once more on the sofa, and then again in bed.  I always touch her smooth naked body when she does.  I nurse her every morning before we get out of bed, and then once more before she leaves for school.  She can suck me as often as she wants to.

I love giving her pleasure.  I love teaching her; and I love how close the two of us are now.  I wouldn't trade that for anything.


------ Appendix ------

If you read through the entire story, then perhaps you noticed a change of tone from the beginning to the end.  In the first chapter, she is almost apologetic, saying that she couldn't help it, being down on herself, describing the negatives about her life and the predicament she was in, being divorced, pregnant, with an 11 year old to take care of.  By the end of her interview, you can clearly see that she is in denial about her relationship with her daughter.  She keeps describing it as "normal" and "natural" but you would be hard-pressed to find any psychologist, or any mainstream American who would describe their relationship as normal.  A relationship that she knows could land her in prison. She is not quite defensive, but definitely in denial, claiming more than once that she has not made a lesbian lover out of her daughter.  Two females who have a sexual relationship, as she does with her daughter, even though they may be bisexual, are lesbian lovers to each other.

She also claimed several times that her actions with her daughter were not sexual, and that she did not rape her daughter.  Rape is a strong term; there is no doubt, however, that she seduced her daughter out of her own needs and took advantage of her daughter's trust, love, innocence, and youthful naivety.  She had sex with her daughter not because her daughter needed it, or had even thought about it, but because she needed a sex partner.

>From apologetic and reluctant, to defiant and proud, she made a sharp transition in just a few short months.  What will happen in the coming year?  Would she and her daughter become permanent lovers?  Would she become bolder and bolder in her exploits?  Will she get caught and sent to prison?  Perhaps I can get another interview out of her in the not-to-distant future.

Zone Master
zone2win@yahoo.com