   ==----...╔═════════════════════╗...----==
  ===----...║                     ║...----===
 ====----...║ .--==Ditto Box==--. ║...----====
=====----...║     tutorial by     ║...----=====
 ====----...║  cracked.anarchist  ║...----====
  ===----...║                     ║...----===
   ==----...╚═════════════════════╝...----==

I'm sure that many of you have wanted at one time or another to
eavesdrop on someone, but have discovered it hard to keep quiet
or keep the mute button down the entire time.  Well, with some
basic tools you can make your own 'mute' button, which is far
easier to operate (i.e. no holding a button down).

To do this, you need the following:
 
    * Phone (get a two piece one made of plastic)
    * 1" Screw (One that is a good electric conductor, no
      coatings)
    * Electrical Tape
    * Screw driver
    * Soldering Iron or auto-drill (to make holes in phone)
    * Insulated Alligator clips (at least 4" long)


NOTE: This box is ugly as hell, and so if you're living in your
parents house, don't do it to the good phone ;)

Now then, once you get the materials, it's time to begin.
First, take the screws out of the phone so you can open it.
If you can't find a screw, check under stickers and table pads.
If all else fails, use a knife to open the phone with
brute force, trying your best not to break anything.

Next, locate the microphone.  There should be two wires leading
from it; red and black.  Cut the red wire in half and strip 
both ends.  

╔═══════════════════════════════════════╗
║  ===--.Diagram of face of phone.--=== ║
╠═══════════════════════════════════════╣
║   _________________________________   ║
║  /                             /   \  ║
║ /   ___     red wire          / ear \ ║
║ | ()---\__/ /_______         | piece |║
║ \      \______________        \     / ║
║  \_____________________________\___/  ║
╚═══════════════════════════════════════╝


After this, wrap one of the exposed ends of the wire around the
pointed end of the screw, and cover the entire exposed end,
along with where it touches the screw, in electrical tape, all
the way up to about 2 mm before the fat part of the screw.
This is important, as it won't work properly if the two ends of
the wire you cut touch.

Now, on the other end of the wire you cut, wrap the exposed
section around one end of the alligator clip, and cover that
exposed end, and where it meets the alligator clip in electrical
tape.  Again, this is important.

After that, heat up the soldering iron.  When it is hot, make a
hole in the phone in such a place and size that you can snugly
fit the screw, and pull out one end of the alligator clip so
that it dangles 1-2 inches below the screw.

╔══════════════════════════════════════╗
║=-.Diagram of hole in side of phone.-=║
╠══════════════════════════════════════╣
║  __                          ______  ║
║ /__\                        /|____|\ ║
║|/  \|______________________|/______\|║
║|                __                  |║
║|---------------(__)-----------------|║
║|_______________|_||_________________|║
║                | || screw            ║
║                | ++                  ║
║                |                     ║
║                ^ alligator clip      ║
║               / \                    ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════╝

Now, use some electrical tape to secure the screw in place, so
it doesn't fall back inside the phone or out of the phone.  Put
the screws back in the phone and voila!  You've made a ditto box.

Now, to test it out.  Plug the phone into the wall and make
sure you get a dial tone.  If you don't, then you need to make
sure all points except the dangling end of the alligator clip
and the fat end of the screw are COMPLETELY covered in
electrical tape, and that you didn't solder the circuit board
accidentally.

To use it, just wait until someone picks up the phone, then
pick up the ditto box phone.  When the alligator clip isn't
clasped on or touching the screw, no noise is transmitted
through the phone.  To talk, just clamp the alligator clip on.

╔══════════════════════════════════════╗
║    =====----...Muted...----=====     ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════╣
║  __                          ______  ║
║ /__\                        /|____|\ ║
║|/  \|______________________|/______\|║
║|                __                  |║
║|---------------(__)-----------------|║
║|_______________|_||_________________|║
║                | ||                  ║
║                | ++                  ║
║                |                     ║
║                ^                     ║
║               / \                    ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════════════════════╗
║  =====----...Un-muted...----======   ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════╣
║  __                          ______  ║
║ /__\                        /|____|\ ║
║|/  \|______________________|/______\|║
║|                __                  |║
║|---------------(__)-----------------|║
║|_______________|_||_________________|║
║                | /|                  ║
║                --++                  ║
║                  \                   ║
║                                      ║
║                                      ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════╝


Additional, optional steps:
  Neon box add-on
  Beige box add-on