                             ________________________________
                           /|                               |
                          / |                               |
                         /  |~~~By Professor TaXi Tennmeg~~~|
                         |  | ~~~The Former TZA Presents~~~ |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |   THE STUPID IDEAS HANDBOOK   |
                         |  |           -Formerly           |
                         |  |    The Little Book of Bad     |
                         |  |            Ideas              |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |          Version 7.1          |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |         Copyright 2001        |
                         |  |   §§§Taggerboy Literature§§§  |
                         |  |                               |
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                         |  |                               |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |                               |
                         |  |_______________________________|
                         |  /                               /
                         | /                               /
                         |/_______________________________/
         
          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~DISCLAIMER~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I, TaXi, am not in any way responsible for anything you try. This stuff is merely educational, but you might want to try anything but the Book Bomb. Once again, don't come to me complaining about how you're grounded, or about how you no longer have a left hand because of the Book Bomb, because it's not my fault. Also, if the paint from the Paint Bomb gets on you, it IS poisonous and it is a sunuvabitch to get out of clothes. Oh, and by the way, even though this stuff is harmless, if you fuck something up and blow up your dog, don't cry to me. I don't see how anything besides the above could blow something up, but, you know, just for insurance, and everything. Thank you.

Table of Contents:

1.Intro
2.Blow Up a Book!
3.Make a Fireball Part I:Ligterball
4.Make a Fireball Part II:Creamerball
5.High-Place Sub-Divisions
5A.Flour Bomb
5B.Smoke Bomb Rocket
5C.Rotten Eggs
5D.Glow in the Dark Terror
5E.Fizzling Panic
6.How to Hide Computer Disks
7.Booby Trap the Door to your Room
8.Fuses
9.Sparkler Bomb
10.Unlisted Numbers
11.Smoking Hands
12.The Simpsons
13.Paint Bomb
14.Vending Machine Fun
15.How to Pee Blue

                      1111111111111INTRO1111111111111

Hello, this is the Prof. I would like to tell you that everything in this book is harmless, except the Book Bomb. DO NOT TRY IT! I learned the hard way! However, even though all the other stuff is pretty harmless, do not go sticking your hand into a fireball, that is just stupidity. Remember, this book is just educational, COMMON §EN§E NOT INCLUDED. The Former TZA and Taggerboy Literature would like to thank Jordan "Devil" Beauchemin, Matt "Big Dog" Holmes, Megan Tuccitto, Brian "Edge" Cooney, David "Toxin Flame" Meehl, Andrew "The Iranian" Moriarty, Shawn "Ace" Fedler, Robbie "Shirt" Cox, John Allison, Chris Marino, Jeremy Novak, Tim Augeri, Mike Arboscello, Nathan Fieldsteel, Geoff Smythe, Abdullah the Butcher, Brandon Williams, Justin Quinlan, and Austin "Pyro" LaVoie.

                2222222222222BLOW UP A BOOK!2222222222222

THIS SHOULD NOT BE TRIED UNLESS FOR SELF-DEFENSE, and why would you use it for self-defense in the first place? Anyway, take a tsp. of blackpowder, gunpowder, and epoxy. Get a book that you don't care about. Get a bunch of pyrotechnical fuses. Open the book. Poke one hole in the middle of the page every 20 or so pages. Put the mixture in each page with a hole. Put the fuse up through the hole so it touches the mixture. Close the book. Wind the fuses all together, light, and run like hell. DO NOT EVEN DO THIS!

        3333333333333MAKE A FIREBALL PART I:LIGHTERBALL3333333333333

Get a lighter. Hold down the gas button for about 2-10 minutes. Let go of the button. Light the lighter. If it works like it should, all the gas from the lighter in the air will ignite from the flame. Another method is to make your hand into a fist and leave a little hole open at the top. Put the lighter in your hand and push the gas button so the gas will go into the hole in your hand. After 2-10 minutes, open your hand and light the lighter. It will look like the fireball is in your hand!

       4444444444444MAKE A FIREBALL PART II:CREAMERBALL4444444444444

Start a campfire or bonfire. Take a bunch of that coffee creamer powder stuff that your parents put in coffee. If none is available, use flour. Though relatively harmless, it can be dangerous if done by a stupid idiot person. Toss the creamer into the air above the fire.
When one little powder-crystal is ignited, it will start a chain reaction and make a big fireball.

             5555555555555HIGH-PLACE SUB-DIVISIONS5555555555555

       These are various mischievous fun things that should be used from high places. 

5A) The Flour Bomb: Take a wet paper towel and pour a given amount of baking flour in the center. Then wrap it up and put on a rubber band to keep it together. When thrown it will fly well but when it hits, it covers the victim with the flower or causes a big puff of flour which will put the victim in terror since as far as they are concerned, some strange white powder is all over them. This is a cheap method of fun and for only the cost of a roll of paper towels and a bag of flour you and your friends can have loads of fun watching people flee in panic. 

5B) Smoke Bomb Rocket: All you need is a bunch of those little round smoke bombs and a wrist rocket or any slingshot. Shoot the smoke bombs and watch people yell since they think it will blow up! 

5C) Rotten Eggs: Take some good eggs and get a sharp needle and poke a small hole in the top of each one. Then let them sit in a warm place for about a week. Then you've got a bunch of rotten eggs that will only smell when they hit! 

5D) Glow in the Dark Terror: Take one of those tubes of glow in the dark cyalume and pour the stuff on whatever you want to throw and when it gets on the victim, they think it's some deadly chemical or a radioactive substance so they run in total panic. This works especially well with flour bombs since a gummy, glowing substance gets all over the victim. 

5E) Fizzling Panic: Take a baggie of a water/baking soda solution and seal it. (Make sure there is no air in it since the solution will form a gas and you don't want it to pop on you.) Then put it in a bigger plastic bag and fill it with vinegar and seal it. When thrown, the two substances will mix and cause a violently bubbling substance to go all over the place.
         
          6666666666666HOW TO HIDE A COMPUTER DISK6666666666666

Get a book you really don't care about. Get a pair of scissors and cut a section of the book out. This works for both floppy disks and ZIP disks. The dimensions for a floppy disk are as follows: Length: 3.5 inches
          Width: 3.5 inches
         Height: 1/8 inch
ZIP disk dimensions: Length: 3.7 inches
                      Width: 3.7 inches
                     Height: 1/4 inch
It is always a good idea to cut away a little more paper than needed. Put the disk inside the empty section. Make sure you put the book in a crowded bookcase with a lot of books, and memorize where the book is. There, now only you know where your secret disk is! This is a handy little tool I use myself to hide certain documents and other files. I recommend trying it; it's pretty cool.

       7777777777777BOOBY TRAP THE DOOR TO YOUR ROOM7777777777777

Get some of those little things that you throw on the ground and they go POP! Get a stool. Make sure you are doing this from the inside of your room and the door is closed. Get three of the poppers. Stand on the stool and wedge the poppers in between the doorframe and the door. When your parent or guest opens the door, falling bombs will give them quite a surprise!

                       8888888888888FUSES8888888888888

SLOW BURNING FUSE
2 inches per minute
Materials needed:
-Cotton string or 3 shoelaces
-Potassium Nitrate or Potassium Chlorate
-Granulated sugar
Procedure:
-Wash the cotton string or shoelaces in HOT soapy water, then 
Rinse with fresh water
-Mix the following together in a glass bowl:
   1 part potassium nitrate or potassium chlorate
   1 part granulated sugar
   2 parts hot water
-Soak strings or shoelaces in this solution
-Twist/braid 3 strands together and allow them to dry
-Check the burn rate to see how long it actually takes!!
(From The Anarchy Cookbook)
                          
                   9999999999999SPARKLER BOMB9999999999999

This thing is so easy to make. Get about 20 sparklers. Tie them together and light one. It doesn't go boom, it goes FWOOSH! Even so, don't hold it in your hand. Light it and put it down and stand 10 feet back.

   10101010101010101010101010UNLISTED NUMBERS10101010101010101010101010


There are a couple of different ways of doing this. Let's see if 
this one will help: Every city has one or more offices dedicated 
to assigning numbers to the telephone wire pairs. These offices 
are called DPAC offices and are available to service reps who are 
installing or repairing phones. To get the DPAC number, a service 
rep would call the customer service number for billing information 
in the town that the number is located in that he is trying to get 
the unlisted number of. (Got that?) The conversation would go 
something like this: "Hi, Amarillo, this is Joe from Anytown 
business office, I need the DPAC number for the south side of 
town." This info is usually passed out with no problems, so... if 
the first person you call doesn't have it, try another. REMEMBER, 
no one has ANY IDEA who you are when you are talking on 
the phone, so you can be anyone you damn well please! (heheheheh!) 
When you call the DPAC number, just tell them that you need a 
listing for either the address that you have, or the name. DPAC 
DOES NOT SHOW WHETHER THE NUMBER IS LISTED OR UNLISTED!! Also, if 
you're going to make a habit of chasing numbers down, you might 
want to check into getting a criss-cross directory, which lists 
phone numbers by their addresses. It costs a couple-a-hundred $, 
but it is well worth it if you have to chase more than one or two 
numbers down! 
(From The Jolly Roger Anarchy Cookbook) 

     11111111111111111111111111SMOKING HANDS11111111111111111111111111 

Find a matchbook or match box. Cut off the striking strip and soak it in water overnight. The next day, let it dry out. Then burn the strip. You will be left with a brown, sticky substance. Ignore the black ash that's left over. Now place the brown substance on your hands. Find a crowd of people and rub your hands like you're cold. Your hands will be smoking. This is great not just for friends, but a great way to meet people in general.

      12121212121212121212121212THE SIMPSONS12121212121212121212121212
I moved this to the bottom because when you print it it comes out half on the page and half off.
                         

        13131313131313131313131313PAINT BOMB131313131313131313131313

Don't do this crap! To make a paint bomb you simply need a metal 
paint can with a refastenable lid, a nice bright color paint (green, pink, purple, 
or some gross color is perfect!), and a quantity of dry ice. Place 
the paint in the can and then drop the dry ice in. Quicky place 
the top on and then run! With some testing you can time 
this to a science. It depends on the ratio of dry ice to paint to 
the size of the can to how full it is. Please don't do this.

  14141414141414141414141414VENDING MACHINE FUN14141414141414141414141414

To really mess up a vending machine, you could put dog shit in the coin return slot or the slot where people reach in to get their food. You could put put foreign coins in the pay slot, or put coins from places like Chucky Cheese's or a similar toddler fun center. You could put marbles in an M&M's bag and leave it in the slot. Or you could fill a chip bag with grass, leaves, shit, ect. and leave it there. If it is a drink dispenser, get a bottle, dup out the real drink, fill it with something different of the same color, and next time they open the machine and leave it open, put it in when no one's looking. Some ideas are piss to a lemonade, vodka to water, or wine to a cranberry drink or some other red drink. Doing any of this crap can get you arrested, though.













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  /     \        (#########)   |\/\/\/|     /\ /\  /\               /\
 |       |      (#########)    |      |     | V  \/  \---.    .----/  \----.
 |  (O)(O)       (O)(O)(##)    |      |      \_        /       \          /
 C   .---_)    ,_C     (##)    | (O)(O)       (O)(O)  <__.   .--\ (O)(O) /__.
  | |.___|    /___,   (##)     C      _)     _C         /     \     ()     /
  |  \__/       \     (#)       | ,___|     /____,   )  \      >   (C_)   <
  /_____\        |    |         |   /         \     /----'    /___\____/___\
 /_____/ \       OOOOOO        /____\          ooooo             /|    |\
/         \     /      \      /      \        /     \           /        \
      15151515151515151515151515HOW TO PEE BLUE15151515151515151515151515
This is harmless, and it will go away after a day or so. Go to your local pool store, and buy some of those detector tabs that people put into a pool to detect pee. Take one with water, and you will be peeing blue for a day! COOL!                                        

  

 

